Hello my fellow readers and welcome to my first ever oneshot! Please bear with me, I'm not very good writing these but I thought I'd give it a go. A bit of angst and romance but please don't be angry with me at the end if you didn't like it. Thanks for all the support from all my fans. Let me know what ya think!
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto!
-X-
"Neji, I l-love you."
They were both fourteen years old when she confessed, back when they were still genin and the concept of love was nothing more than mere desire for most people their age. However, for Tenten, her love was much more meaningful and significant than just a silly infatuation. Since their academy days, the Hyuga prodigy had always earned himself an army of loyally, faithful fangirls who did nothing but over obsess his good looks and overflowing talent. They would gush praises at him, try to woo him with the most expensive gifts and beautify themselves in the hope of one day, the boy might notice them. But of course, Neji never glanced their way. The girls wanted to be with him and the boys wanted to be like him. It was rather pathetic, Tenten observed as she watched the simpering expressions her female classmates would bestow upon the young Hyuga. She remembered scoffing at their disgraceful behaviour for no proper kunoichi would rhapsodise their feelings over some boy so publicly. It wasn't that the brunette didn't admire the white-eyed prodigy, it was just that she had enough common sense and decency to not communicate her feelings to every single person within a five-mile radius. Plus, she was more focused on becoming a strong, dependable kunoichi, like her idol the legendary Sanin, Tsunade. Neji was extremely attractive, yes, especially for a ten year old boy and there was no doubt that his skills were unparalleled. His hoard of fangirls knew nothing else about the boy and therefore their feelings, in Tenten's opinion were shallow and insincere. They only liked him for his exterior and inherited abilities. However, the bun haired girl admired him for so much more. He was inspiring to watch, his determination and motivation emanating in everything he did. Whereas the other kids would be playing and running around the courtyard during their break time, Neji would always skulk off somewhere quiet and private to train. Some days, Tenten would follow him and watch from afar as he attempted to hone his skills. He was truly astounding to watch – practicing a single move or position, over and over again until it was nothing but perfect. Watching Neji train as hard as he did encouraged her to work harder in order to fulfil her dream.
It wasn't long after that they were placed on the same team, much to Tenten's delight and the anger and disappointment of Neji's fan cub, alongside the class failure, Rock Lee and their new, over enthused sensei Maito Gai. The brunette was absolutely thrilled at the prospect of getting to know the Hyuga prodigy better and hopefully improve her skills alongside him. Although it was much more difficult breaking his cold and icy façade than the weapons mistress had thought. Neji preferred individual effort compared to teamwork and he often berated Lee for his lack of skill as a shinobi. Even though he was never as cruel to her as he was to most people, she knew she was nothing but a nuisance to him, like a sack of dirty laundry he had been fetched to pick up. He trained in isolation, working tirelessly until he was on the verge of collapsing. He was a mystery that she was determined to decipher and so Tenten set out the task of trying to befriend her inhospitable teammate. The only thing that they shared in common was their increasing annoyance at Gai's and Lee's ridiculous antics. Whenever the two began rambling on some ludicrous idea or self-imposed rule, Neji and Tenten always share exasperated groans and irritated expressions. It wasn't much, but it was something. She knew that the strains within his family was the cause for all of his bitterness but she didn't why. During the first year of being a team, Gai would always propose group training (much to Neji's aggravation) and the four of them would spar and exercise in order to increase their strength, speed and accuracy. Over time, it was obvious that their sensei blatantly favoured Lee and the two would go off by themselves and perfect Lee's Taijutsu. That left Neji and Tenten alone and though she suggested training together, he declined and continued to work on his own. However, it wasn't long after that he asked her to help him practice and Tenten couldn't have been more pleasantly surprised. It was more like an order than a request, coming from Neji, but she daren't refuse him. And so, every day she would get up at the crack of dawn and spar with her teammate. The first couple of months were hard on her and she noticed there was a major difference between them in strength, speed and stamina as the weapons mistress attempted to keep up with Neji's vigorous training regime. It annoyed her, in the beginning to know she was much more inferior than he was, but she shouldn't have expected any less. Yet, she there was one area that she outshone him in and that was weaponry and accuracy. The brunette had said yes to training with the white-eyed prodigy in hoping she would learn a thing or two from him but she never expected that he would learn a thing or two from her. It was beneficial for the both of them; Tenten could use a variety of new weapons, perfect her techniques and try to keep on par with her teammate whilst Neji would have to learn how to evade multiple attacks at once, increasing the range of his Byakugan and speed.
It wasn't until a year later that the Chunin Exams were being held in Konoha and Tenten was more than ready to prove herself capable as a Chunin and show that her time training with the great Hyuga prodigy had not gone to waste. During that time period, they had become much closer friends and her crush deepened and the admiration she felt for him burned. Even though the Chunin Exams saw her ineligible to proceed from the preliminary rounds to the finals, Neji still asked her to train with him in order to perfect the Kaiten. Tenten couldn't have been more thankful for that moment because even though she hadn't won, he still believed in her skill, but the shocking, new developments didn't end there. Halfway into the month of his training he told her about the strained relations between the branches within the Hyuga Clan and the death of his father. Tenten was stunned, shocked but appreciative that he trusted her enough to tell her and she knew that it was his way of letting her know that he at least regarded her as a friend. He was still distant and withdrawn but Tenten knew, more than anybody else, that despite his hostile exterior, the boy had a heart. The finals of the exam took a turn for the better, however she was more than astonished to witness Neji defeated to Naruto whom they all deemed a failure. She was eternally filled with gratitude towards the hyperactive blonde as his victory over her once glacial teammate unlocked a new, kinder and more compassionate side of Neji that she knew had always been there. He became much more reliable and pleasant to be around and he began to mend his relationships with Lee and Hinata. He would accompany his teammates and sometimes members from the Rookie Nine to friendly dinners and lunches and though sometimes he would train with the head of the Hyuga clan or Hinata, the bun-haired girl knew he preferred training with her. Tenten felt so honoured that she able to witness this change in him and if anything, her love for him increased. She wasn't sure what motivated her to tell him. She wasn't even sure if he felt the same way. If anything, the only thing he saw her as was a teammate and a friend. Yet, deep down, Tenten hoped that maybe he might feel something for her. After all, he had never been too severe towards her and she knew held great respect towards her as a kunoichi. But she could no longer contain it. She needed to tell him and he needed to know.
It had been a long, strenuous day. The couple had been training for six hours straight in the gruelling heat and by the time the sun began to dip behind the mountains, they were both utterly exhausted. Tenten hadn't really been planning on confessing her love for the Hyuga prodigy right after a difficult sparring session but the urge in her was too strong. Neji had turned to leave – bag slung over his back and muscles sore and aching from overexertion. He was ready to go home and have a well-earned rest and he would have kept walking if he hadn't heard four words uttered from his teammate behind him that froze him in place. She had confessed to the ground, her eyes downcast as she spoke so softly she wasn't sure whether or not he had heard what she had said. However, when she glanced upwards, Tenten knew the boy had listened for he was unmoving. All at once, she could feel the panic seize her and her heart thudded painfully against her chest. Blood roared in her ears and she clenched her sweaty palms as she mentally and physically braced herself for his answer. It was unbelievably terrifying and Tenten could feel her body preparing itself for the 'fight of flight' situation. Her mind was in a frenzy as it began whirring with possibilities to his reaction. Would he be disgusted? Would he turn around and never talk to her ever again? Could he possibly feel the same way? Would it now make everything awkward between them? She felt utterly foolish, having this sort of a reaction as though she was about to be attacked at any moment by an enemy shinobi. Yet, somehow, being at the mercy of the man of whom she had just confessed her love to, was doubly terrifying.
Neji turned around slowly, expression unreadable as his beautiful, ivory eyes bored intensely into her frightened, chocolate orbs. Time, itself, seemed to stop and Tenten felt her breath come to a complete halt as he stared at her. He was truly flawless as she gazed right back into his undeniably handsome face. She wanted nothing more at that moment than to reach her hand up to his face and stroke the smooth skin on his cheek, however she was paralysed and unable to move. After a few more moments of tormenting silence, she watched as the corners of his lips curved downwards and she could feel her muscles constrict as she awaited his verdict.
"I'm sorry," he spoke softly but clearly, eyes never leaving hers.
Reality came crashing down around her and Tenten felt as though a white-hot, branding iron had been stamped onto her crumbling heart as the apologetic words were uttered from Neji's lips. She wouldn't cry, not in front of him, but her body began to tremble as she tried to compose herself.
"Oh," was all she could manage before diverting her gaze away from his.
She had been a fool. He didn't love her. Neji didn't love anybody and now she had just entirely humiliated herself in front of the only man she loved. If this was love and if this was heartbreak, she did not want it. Tenten looked up just in time to see an emotion she could not catch, flicker within the depths of his eyes. He stared at her blankly before turning back around and heading home, leaving her alone at the training grounds. She wasn't sure how long she had been standing there immobilised, until she crumbled to her knees and began to cry. The pain of rejection was shooting through her body and stabbing every nerve within her being. The weapons mistress wrapped her arms around her torso as she began to shake uncontrollably. It was growing dark and the tears still flowed from her eyes. Lee found her, crying her eyes out over a boy who she knew would never return her feelings. He took the brunette in his arms and cradled her, pressing her head against his chest as he attempted to wipe away her tears. It was unnerving, to see Tenten break down like this and Lee wished with his entire heart that she would one day find happiness. He knew of her feelings towards their teammate and he also knew just how independent and stoic Neji was. Lee knew Neji cared for his female teammate but it would take a few more years to realise just how much he appreciated her. The stars were beginning to shimmer through the wisps of cloud and though it was a beautiful night, it couldn't have been less perfect for Tenten. Lee took her home and placed her in the comfort of her bed before leaving, promising to check up on her in the morning. Tenten did not sleep that night, instead she laid wide awake, sorting out her options: she could never show her face to Neji ever again, she was embarrassed and the sight of him would surface a wave of unbearable pain she did not want to face. She could ignore him, pretend that she doesn't know him or she could do what she does best and put on a smile, pretend like it never happened and get over him.
Tenten chose the latter. She was a kunoichi, after all, and she would soon be presented with deadly situations filled with impossible decisions. She needed to be strong and she wasn't about to let her feelings for Neji make her weak. She would show him and the rest of the world that she was unaffected and that she would be able to get over him. So the next day, Tenten showed up to training as usual and she noticed Neji was rather surprised to see her there. Her heart stung painfully at the sight of him but she steeled herself and they trained as if yesterday hadn't happened. Lee had caught up with her later in the day and insisted that they talk about what happened last night. Tenten refused. She told him that she was going to let her love for Neji go and that they were only ever expected to be teammates and friends. The green-clad boy desperately pleaded with her to not give up her feelings for the Hyuga prodigy, promising that one day he would come to his senses and claim her but Tenten disregarded him. If she wanted to become strong, she needed to banish these feelings of weakness and train hard if she wanted to be a skilled kunoichi. Lee saw her hard, unbroken resolve and he regretfully and unwillingly gave in. She made him swear that he would never say a word of this to Neji and that she was going to go about it as if nothing had ever changed.
Four years went by and Lee had stayed true to his word. Tenten had also permanently ridded herself of any romantic affection she had previously felt towards the Byakugan user. If anything, he was her best and most loyal friend and she was content. She had made the right decision by abandoning her love for Neji and focusing on her dream. She was now a respectable Jounin alongside both Lee and Neji. She had worked hard and trained fiercely under Neji's tutelage and she was one step closer to becoming Konoha's top weapons specialist. The years gone by had seen both of Tenten's teammates develop into fine, young men. Lee had discarded his bowl-cut for something much more fitting and he was hailed as Konoha's top Taijutsu Master. Neji, had only grown even more devastatingly handsome as years of gruelling training chiselled his lean body into something much more defined and muscular. They were an unstoppable team and they were destined for even greater things to come.
-X-
"Tenten, I love you."
He had confessed to her when they were both eighteen years of age. They were now the ranking of Jounin and the concept of love was formidable. Neji was positive about many things in his life but the thing he was most certain of was his feelings towards his female teammate. To this day, he still remembered her heartfelt proclamation of love back when they were still young and carefree. He had rejected her then because he didn't have time nor patience for such trivial feelings. He was focused on becoming stronger and he wanted her to reach for the same things. He knew of her feelings long before her confession but he hadn't realised how difficult it was to rebuff her advances. Neji had cared for her more than he wanted to admit but he knew that if Tenten wanted to achieve her dream, she would have to discard her feelings for him aside and focus on the task at hand. He knew it would crush her but it was necessary if she wanted become the shinobi she wanted to be. He was more than surprised when she had shown up to training the next day, and though she hadn't spoken a single word, the white-eyed prodigy knew that she wouldn't let what happened come in the way of what she desired. He was happy they were still friends and within a year his efforts had paid off and he was promoted to Jounin while Lee and Tenten were made Chunin. It was a big step forward for the three of them and Neji couldn't have been prouder. He was close to his goal at becoming the strongest Hyuga and the most formidable fighter within the Leaf Village. Tenten still had a ways to go but he personally trained her and made time for her in order to achieve her best. Yet, he couldn't shake away the fluttering feeling in his chest whenever her skin came into contact with his or when he made her smile. It was confusing and irritating at the same time but Neji thought nothing of it.
When they were sixteen, the Hyuga prodigy came to realise that he was attracted to Tenten. He did not go into denial for he had been in denial for the past year. Every time he saw her, it was like he was seeing her for the first time and he couldn't help but marvel at just how beautiful she was. He found himself making feeble excuses to be around her and touch her. He would endure team dinners with Gai and Lee competing against one another in ridiculous eating contests just so he could sit next to her. He would extend the long hours of training just so he could spend more time with her and he would often correct her poise and technique just so he could feel her smooth skin slide under his as he nudged her body into position. But now they were eighteen and Tenten and Lee had joined Neji by making Jounin and he couldn't have been prouder. They were almost there and the past two years saw Neji's feelings intensify into love. He had always assumed that Tenten still held those same feelings towards him even after all this time. She didn't show it as often but he knew she greatly admired him and preferred him over any of her other friends. He decided it was time to tell her how he felt and finally they could begin their lives together as a couple. They had almost achieved what they had set out to do as children and in a years' time they would have completed it.
He had pulled her aside before training one morning. He hadn't realised how nervous he was until he was staring into her beautiful eyes and holding her wrist to keep her from moving. He had never felt this way before and he was somewhat excited and exhilarated and the words were almost jumping out of his mouth. Even though she was wearing the same attire and she looked the same as she did every day, this morning she looked even more enticing than she ever had. The way that the strands of her hair caught the morning sunlight and shimmered like golden silk or the way that her long lashes brushed innocently against her cheekbones or how her slender body curved gloriously and prompted him to encircle her with his arm. She seemed a little surprised when he told her he wanted to talk before they began sparring but made her way over to the great oak tree where he stood and listened patiently.
"Tenten, I love you."
He had said the words positively and clearly and his eyes never left hers as he confessed himself to her. He could feel the nerves beginning to buzz around inside his stomach as he watched for her reaction. This was not what Tenten was expecting and she just stared at him, expression unchanging.
"What?" she spoke after a moments silence and dropped her hand from Neji's grip.
"I said I love you," the Hyuga prodigy repeated firmly, his heart beating so rapidly he thought his chest would explode.
Tenten felt herself frown and she folded her arms tightly across her chest.
"Neji, whatever joke this is, it's not funny."
The words stung but Neji gazed at her determinedly and advanced towards her saying, "It's not a joke, Tenten. I love you."
The weapons mistress couldn't believe her ears. He was serious. There was no emotion in his expression that betrayed what he was admitting to her. She didn't know what to say.
"No you don't," she told him as she took a step back, holding up a hand as if to warn him from moving closer.
"I promise I do, Tenten," he told her huskily as he stepped forward and he heard her gasp as her back was pressed up against the trunk of the tree.
"Neji, I –" Tenten never got to finish her sentence because her lips were somewhat occupied by Neji's.
He had kissed her and his body couldn't have prepared him for the sensation that it brought him. He felt as though his stomach had burst into flames and that his entire being had been pulled apart and then put back together in a matter of nano-seconds. One hand was solidly placed on the bark next to her head while his other hand trailed across her collarbone before curving around her neck to deepen the kiss. All too soon, he felt a hand on his chest push him away in a rough shove and he stumbled back slightly before gazing at his teammates expression. She was glaring at him in anger and her entire body was tense and rigid. He could feel the pain and hurt spread throughout his body and it was at that moment he realised he had it all wrong.
"You don't love me."
Tenten's expression softened ever so slightly at his words. No, she didn't love him. Not in the way he wanted her to. Neji didn't need a verbal answer to know he was right, her features said it all and he felt as though the world had just been yanked from under his feet. It was a pain like he had never experienced, worse than any physical pain he had ever possibly endured. A hole was being drilled into his heart and his lungs began collapsing on him and he was finding it difficult to breathe.
"I'm sorry," he heard her say, and the memory of him saying those exact words to her years ago imprinted clearly in his mind.
She didn't need to explain it to him. He knew why. He had been a complete fool. Foolish enough to think that she would remain in love with him after he crushed her hopes with the same two words she had just spoken to him. He had hurt her beyond belief and he was the only one to blame for the pain he was going through now. He wondered if this is what Tenten had gone through when he had rejected her all those years ago. If so, he wondered how on earth she was able to survive seeing him day after day with this much hurt flowing through her. He didn't know what to do. So he ran. He ran away from her disappearing into the forest. He didn't know where he was running but he knew it was to get away from her, from the pain, from the love he felt and for once his composure cracked and he could feel the hot tears streak down his cheeks and his legs burned as they carried him far away. His heart was being ripped into two leaving a portion with him and the other with her. She didn't love him and he had done this to himself and he deserved it. Because no matter how much you love someone, everyone has their limits and sometimes love doesn't wait.
A/N – Oh my god please don't hate me! I know it wasn't a happy ending and I'm sorry but I really liked it. I thought it was a good idea to show that sometimes you might love someone so much that when they shatter you, you can never quite love them the same again and that is what happened here. Poor Neji I feel so bad for him. Let me know what you think and fav, follow and review! Also check out my other stories The Laws of Logic, Paper Memories and Falling for the Extraordinary which will be updated soon!