Why

The question screamed its self in my head over and over again. Why was my life ruined.

Why did I need to pay for something I didn't do.

Why do I have this life.

My cold uncovered feet scratch against the hard ground as I supported myself on a wall. My fingers numb as the winter breeze made me pull my coat tight around me. My legs slowly give out as my eyes tried to stay open.

Goosebumps ran across my skin like wildfire. My finger unconsciously rub my ears, feeling the soft, red and black earrings under them. They were old but unique. They was simply beautiful. Mama had given it to me a few years ago. They were past down on from generation to generation. Unfortunately, she had to go too soon.

It was October, the 23rd, when my life changed faster then you could flick a light one. It was just me and Mama. Mama had been feeling ill all week but no one knew when the doctors would show up.

She didn't like being the reason papa would never go to work. So of course she convinced papa that she would be fine and that she really wanted to spend some alone time with me. I'll tell you now it was a stupid idea.

I was sitting opposite to mama. Mama's back was resting against the headboard as her fingers rubbed against her ear. I must have got the habit of rubbing my earrings from her. She had told me that she got that habit from grandma.

I was talking about how much I love designing when I felt her normally warm hand that seemed to turn cold, fragile. She held mine as her eyes looked different, more...dull. A tear fell from her eye. I was now panicking. Mama was so full of life. She always looked on the bright side of things. To see her cry would be as if you saw someone licking a tree.

To see her afraid was to see a lion belly dancing. She curled her other hand around mine as her earrings were gently drop into the my palm of my small hand. I looked up at my mother to see her smiling face but body unmoving.

Her hands slowly enclosed mine as they fall limp. Her once red blush had now gone pale white, as with the rest of her body. It was silent for a few seconds, Not a sound could be heard.

I swear I felt my own heart stop. I stayed frozen. Just as frozen as mama's lifeless body.

As realized what was happening, my face went as white as a ghost. My body rushed towards her as I screamed for papa. But no. No one was around. All because I wanted to see mama. Wait... She wanted to be with me.

Me

I slowly realize this is all my fault. If Papa had stayed home he would have known what to do. My legs rush around the house looking for medicine or anything to help mama.

At midnight papa came home to see me cradling mama, screaming like there was no tomorrow. I screamed for him to get a doctor but papa stood unmoving as tears trickled down his face.

He fell to the ground and sobbed and sobbed til I couldn't bare it and ran out of that warm house that has now became dark, cold and full of memories I want to forget. No... NEED to forget.

But I knew I couldn't leave papa there. He would be too lonely. so I wondered back home after a few hours only too see the front door wide and open.

I called papa's name, Newmorise times but all I heard back was my Echo. Everything was different. My heart rate picked up when I saw the couch flipped over.

I event into papas and mama's bed to see everything empty and clean. I eventually new what had happened but I didn't want to admit it.

Papa left me.

Left me behind.

Left the memories behind

Left mama behind

Left everything

That's not how I ended on the middle of a sidewalk

No.

After papa had left me I hand out at the hospital a lot. Watched all the ladies work on a man who had a heart attack. I figured out how I could have saved mama.

Every night I would stay In the library shelves. Until one lady caught me. She first thought that I was a patient that ran away. I asked that same lady if she could teach me all about hospitality and stuff.

She took me in ever since and I love her for that. I ended up telling her about papa and mama. I ended up being like her own daughter. But Chloe the most Annoying person in the world hurt her finger everyone was scared because Chloe's father was not the nicest person.

Apparently he lost his wife because Chloe said his wife was cheating on him. So when I walked into her room to check it out. I looked closely at her hand and they only damage I saw was one of her nails where chipped.

"Um Chloe there is nothing wrong with your hand."

And then all of a sudden she screamed for daddy dearest. I tried calming her down but she kept screaming as if she was about to be attacked by a lion. Even if she was, I think that it would be scared away by her screams.

her father thought that I was trying to kill her. So he kicked me out and threatened me if I ever stayed at the nurses house again he would kill her in front of me.

All the doctors told him otherwise and that I was one of their best doctors and that I was just a child. The president loved his daughter more. That's how I'm on the streets. I can feel my body slowly going into shut down mode.

And for once I'm happy.

Maybe I'll see mama soon.

but instead of seeing a white light, i saw a golden, yellow-ish light. maybe my soul in floating towards the sun.

but before i collapse. i hear someone whisper

"I'm here to help you"

then the darkness swallowed me up before i could respond to anything.