AN
I do NOT own Naruto or ShikaTema
However I do own the 3 teens who are calling Shikamaru Sensei. Watch out for them. They may or may not be reoccurring. ;-)
Kids
Shikamaru twiddled his fingers in the nearly empty hospital hallway. Temari had been admitted 17 hours ago and frankly, Shikamaru was growing anxious. And tired, but mostly anxious.
'Do these things always take this long?' Shikamaru thought as his eyelids drooped slightly.
Shikamaru sighed deeply. His mother told him a couple days ago that he "took days to come out" and "hurt like fucking hell". Shikamaru guessed his mother was exaggerating about how long it took but, since Yoshino was never one to swear, he assumed she was right about the pain. In fact Kurenai, who had also given birth at one point in time, said even the strongest of women scream during child birth.
…
Then why wasn't Temari screaming? Screw that, why wasn't she even swearing or doing something equally Temari-like? She could at least make some sort of noise, just to ensure she was still alive. But damn her. Stubborn women refused to show any sign of weakness.
Shikamaru squeezed his eyes shut, in deep thought and worry.
Then suddenly…
SPLASH.
He was soaking wet. As Shikamaru looked up, he came face to face with a teen. A brownish-red headed and green eyed teen. A smiling, brownish-red headed and green eyed teen. Did this kid have any idea what he had done?
"Fumio," Shikamaru started in a slightly irritated tone, "if you were still 12, I would have demoted you back to the acad-"
"Lighten up Sensei! I'm just trying to save you from getting a beating at home! Falling asleep when your wife is giving birth might make said wife angry," Fumio defended.
Shikamaru, slightly embarrassed, mumbled, "I wasn't asleep."
"Yeah. And I have green eyes."
Just then, a boy with jet black hair, dressed in standard ninja attire, appeared. "Thing is, Fumio, you do have green eyes."
"They're greenish-blue."
"You sound queer."
"That Isamu," Fumio pointed his finger at the black haired boy, "is exactly the attitude that creates bullies. With more people like you around the world people will stop expressing there thoughts and just stop talking, thereby isolating themselves, thereby possibly being at risk of depression, thereby possibly committing suicide. And one more thing: there is nothing wrong with a fine male specimen like myself demonstrating his intelligence by specifying the exact, yes exact, shade of his eyes."
Isamu suppressed the urge to grin. "You still sound queer."
"Go die."
"Now you sound like Reiko."
"Who sounds like me?" A girl, with a paper bag in her hand, asked. As she walked towards them, her sort of wavy black hair swayed. Her eyes were green and her expression curious. She was dressed in a simple black t-shirt and fitting pale blue jeans. Her headband was tied around her tiny waist, while her two teammates wore theirs on their foreheads.
"You're a slut." Isamu accused instantly.
Reiko's forehead wrinkled. "Dot dot dot."
"Just look at yourself!"
"You're showing more skin than I am," Reiko answered with a light laugh.
Isamu gasped. "How dare you lay your eyes on my beautiful body?" he spoke in a squeaky voice.
Fumio chuckled. "And you call me queer."
However, Fumio went unheard as Isamu continued. "Well, I should expect this much from a," he suddenly went into a whisper, "sex addict"
By this point, Reiko was obviously irritated. "How the hellam I supposed to be a sex addict if I'm a virgin?"
Isamu placed his palm on her shoulder. "The first step is to admit you have a problem."
Reiko scowled and slapped Isamu's hand off her shoulder. Then she turned to Shikamaru and asked, "So how's Temari?"
Shikamaru sighed lightly and answered, "No news yet."
Isamu copied his sensei and sighed. "My apprentice isn't born yet."
"Umm, we agreed the first kid is my apprentice." Reiko corrected.
"No we didn't."
"Yeah, we did."
"Just take the second one."
"Umm, but we agre-"
"JUST TAKE THE SECOND ONE."
"…fine. Whatever."
"Why'd you agree so quickly?" Isamu asked suspiciously.
"Maybe because I'm not obnoxious."
"Maybe because you want to RAPE him! We all know the second one will be a boy!"
"What the fu-"
"You're a pervert."
Reiko's eyes narrowed as she glared. "Go die."
At that point Isamu burst out laughing. "Calm down Reiko! I'm just kidding. You're so gullible."
Reiko however was not so amused. "Screw you."
Shikamaru, by now, was just tired of their arguing. "So where did you go Reiko?"
Reiko was surprised at the sound of her sensei's voice. "Oh, I went to buy a snack."
Fumio's eyes widened, "That's a snack?" he pointed at the enormous paper bag in her hand.
She merely shrugged.
Just then, a hospital room opened and Ino burst out. "You guys can come in now!"
Instantly all 4 of them ran into the room. And there was Temari, lying in the hospital bed, with two tiny bundles in her arms, smiling.
"Congratulations! You have twins. By the way, the girl is older by one minute." Ino congratulated.
It was several hours later and mostly everyone was gone. The only remaining were Shikamaru, Reiko and Temari (duh). Temari was sleeping peacefully in her rock hard hospital bed. One of the babies was in Shikamaru's arms, asleep. Reiko was rocking the other one in her arms.
"Hey kid, it's getting late. You should get home. Your parents are probably worried."
Reiko glanced up for a second. "Nah. Besides, these kids are going to idolize me when their older, so it's kinda my job to make sure their father doesn't die of boredom and their mother doesn't die of exhaustion. Wouldn't want them growing up orphans."
Shikamaru grinned at his student's logic.
"So…sensei.
"Yeah?"
You should probably get a chastity belt. Or invest in condoms."
Shikamaru's eyebrows rose instantly. "What!?"
"You always said you wanted 2 kids, a girl then a boy. And you have that. Just stay protected, you know, helps not to make any mistakes."
And Shikamaru just sat there, grinning awkwardly.
There's nothing wrong with this. No. Just talking about his intimate life with his 17 year old student. Besides, she's like his daughter.
Oh shit. That's even worse.