Homura Reacts to Fanfiction, Part 1!
A/N: Welcome, one and all, to Weis-I mean, Lucin-I mean...err, I'm not used to making new things. Welcome, one and all, to Homura Reacts! Yes! I am FINALLY writing for this fandom, and it shall be amazing. For those of you not familiar with me, you may recognise me from my other fics Weiss Reacts and Lucina Reacts. Judging by the title, it wouldn't be inaccurate to assume that this'll be exactly like those fics- reacting to fanfiction and everything else.
Which means the typical canon-raping insanity typical of these fics. Read at your own peril. We will be ignoring the events of Rebellion and going with Reactsverse canon for obvious reasons (a bit hard to make a comedic fanfic about Madoka if she's a goddess who technically doesn't exist, no?)
DISCLAIMER: Puella Magi Madoka Magica belongs to Studio Shaft, otherwise Madoka, Homura and Hitomi would be doing Azusa, Mio and Mugi cosplays. (With Kyubey donning Wolf!Ritsu hats!)
All mentioned franchises and characters belong to their respective owners.
It was a peaceful day in Mitakhihara. All was well and all was perfect in the world, especially in the world of one Homura Akemi.
Until one fateful morning, down at the Kaname Residence.
"AAAAAAAHHHHH!"
The first thing that jolted Homura from her peaceful slumber was the sound of Madoka's screaming.
Not the nicest thing to hear at eight in the morning, all things considered. Especially for Homura.
"Madoka!" Homura's eyes shot open quickly, looking around, her hand flying instinctively to the back of her arm where her buckler would be, before remembering she wasn't in Puella Magi form. "...what's going on? What the-"
"H-Homura..." Madoka backed away from the computer, shaking her head, horrified. "W-what did I..."
The black-haired girl immediately took her aside, staring at the computer screen.
"Madoka, what did you..."
Homura was rendered speechless by the contents of the screen, of course.
It was a narrative of some sort, from initial inspection. That in itself was not unusual- Madoka loved reading stories on her computer, after Hitomi had gotten her into it. She was particularly fond of that one web novel about a girl with superpowers involving the control of insects and other such small creatures, Homura had noted from her web history.
This was completely different.
For one, this story was about her and Madoka. Specifically, her doing incredibly lewd things to Madoka, involving chocolate syrup, for some sick and perverted reason. She couldn't take her eyes off the part where Madoka squealed in pleasure, either- the thought of which Homura was forced to shake out of her head, as much as she enjoyed it.
The black-haired girl blinked, blushing profusely. She felt the warmth spread on her cheeks, a strange feeling for her.
This would only be the first of many.
She opened her mouth, as if to protest, but nothing could come out; her embarrassment was far too overpowering
"H-Homura...w-what is that?!" The pinkette squeaked out, hiding underneath a blanket. "I-It's so...I-I don't...
What were you do -"
"You don't need to know, Madoka." Homura stated firmly, mastering herself and regaining her composure. "I'll tell you when you're old enough. Like when you're twenty-three."
"...w-who...who would write something like that?!" Madoka cried, shocked. "...a-are there people out there willing to embarrass us? Is someone trying to blackmail us?"
Homura immediately scanned the room for hidden cameras of any sort that would catch their reactions- taking a look at Madoka's various plushies, ranging from tiny dog plushies to ones of that bear-like mascot from that one store Homura swore was everywhere nowadays, on the ceiling and even the computer itself.
None were to be found.
'Wait.' Homura thought carefully. '...of course. Clearly, only one person would dare do something so perverted.
Sayaka Miki...you've gone TOO far. I know you and I have been at odds for a while, but to hurt Madoka...I cannot allow it!'
Homura's expression hardened and her fist clenched.
"Madoka, I will be right back." She stood up, strolling over to the bedroom door. "I...believe I know who created such a story.
I'll have to have some words with them."
Madoka reached after her. "Homura, don't do something too horrible! It wasn't that-"
The door slammed behind the black-haired girl as she left.
"...bad." The pinkette sighed. "...Homura, you don't need to do things like that just because they embarrass me..."
Meanwhile, at the Miki Residence...
Kyoko sighed, popping open a pack of Pocky and shoving one stick into her mouth, resting her legs on a coffee table.
"Heh. Life's good, eh, Sayaka?"
The blunette sighed, grumbling. "Kyoko, please, I just cleaned that table..."
"Whoops." Kyoko lifted her feet and put them back on the floor, rubbing the resultant smudge off with her sleeve, chuckling and grinning. "No biggie? See? All gone!"
"Not the point." Sayaka shook her head. "Dammit, Kyoko, just because you live here doesn't mean you have to treat it like a pigsty..."
"Well, excuse me, princess, but some of us didn't have the luxury of living in a house at all-"
Suddenly, the front door fell down with a thud to reveal an irritated Homura.
She was decked out in full Puella Magi gear and what looked like a sawn-off shotgun in her hands. The black-haired girl looked around, glaring at both girls, and patted her buckler firmly to garner their attention- not that kicking the door down hadn't already.
"Akemi?" Kyoko raised her eyebrow. "What the hell are you-"
"Shut it, Sakura." The black-haired girl shot her fellow a glare, before looking over at Sayaka. "Miki, what did you do to Madoka?"
"Huh?" Sayaka looked confused. "What are you-"
"Don't play innocent with me, I know you wrote it!"
"Innocent?" The blunette glared at her. "Homura, you're talking nonsense! What are you talking about?"
Homura closed her eyes and sighed irritably, shaking her head vigorously. "Just...Just get me to a computer so I can show you the thing you clearly did!"
...
"Wow." Sayaka raised an eyebrow, impressed. "You've got a good memory. How'd you memorise such a long web address-"
"Shut up, Miki, you knew I'd memorise it." Homura interjected harshly, showing her the story. "There. Recognise it now?"
Kyoko took one look, before her mouth opened in shock, the Pocky almost dropping out if it hadn't been caught with her free hand.
"That...is one dirty story."
Sayaka blushed profusely. "Well...I-I mean...wait...why do you think I wrote it?!"
"Because...actually, now that I think of it, blaming you was somewhat irrational, even if we were at odds once." Homura noted, nodding slowly.
Kyoko facepalmed, before staring at Homura. "You mean you kicked down our front door-"
"MY front door, Kyoko." Sayaka corrected her. "The one I have to explain to my parents, by the way-"...because you thought Sayaka, the most innocent of all virgins-"
"D-does that really need to be brought up?!" The blunette snapped, blushing.
"...wrote a story about you and Madoka getting all touchy-feely to make you feel embarrassed?" The redhead continued, giving Homura a quizzical look.
"Wait, how do you know she's a-" Homura started.
"You don't need to know." Kyoko snapped.
Sayaka looked away, ashamed. "S-shut up, Kyoko..."
The black-haired girl filed that away for future reference, before clearing her throat and continuing. "Anyway...I...I only reacted so harshly because Madoka was embarrassed."
"Oh. So you're worried about your girlfriend now, is that so?" The redhead grinned, watching Homura stare at her for a second before shaking her head rigorously.
"S-she's not my girlfriend!"
"Keep talking like that and maybe it'll be true, Akemi." Kyoko scoffed, shoving another Pocky stick into her mouth. "Anyway, I can tell you none of us wrote that kinda crap."
"I see." Homura sighed, putting her shotgun away and transforming back to her civilian form. "Thank you for the clarification.
And sorry about the door, Miki. If you excuse me, I have a person to be looking for."
With that, she walked out of Sayaka's bedroom.
"Hey!" The blunette yelled after her. "You still have to fix my door, you know! The one you kicked in!"
No response.
"Dammit." Sayaka sighed, exasperated. "And I already have to deal with you, Kyoko..."
"Least I don't kick down doors like some action hero." Kyoko scoffed, before pointing the pack of Pocky sticks in her hand towards her housemate.
"Want one?"
Later, at Mitakihara Park...
"...Tomoe, where are you?" Homura sighed, looking around as she brought up the story on her phone- that she most certainly did not remember because she enjoyed reading it- and sat on a bench, waiting for the senior magical girl of Mitakihara to show up.
"Tomoe? Where-oh, good grief, Mami."
The roar of a motorcycle could be heard nearby. Homura sighed in exasperation as she looked to her left, where the sound came from.
Indeed, a motorcycle was rumbling up to her. It was custom-made, with a snowflake symbol Homura did not recognise, and plated with gold and chrome coverings and an engine even the most obsessed of bikers would kill for.
And upon it was a voluptuous blonde girl, leather jacket and aviator scarf perfectly perched on her, with her eyes hidden behind shiny black shades, her golden curls flying in the wind behind her as she swerved the bike to a stop. She climbed off it, strolling towards the black-haired girl who was staring at her.
Mami Tomoe, resident senior magical girl of Mitakihara, raised her shades and looked over at Homura, shooting her as cool a look as she could muster.
"...you like my new look? I think it makes me look perfectly dashing." Mami announced proudly, dusting her leather jacket off.
Homura's eyes narrowed irritably.
"...what kind of silly look is that?! What are you, some kind of delinquent?"
Mami frowned, before taking her jacket off to reveal her normal gothic bustier, sighing.
"You could stand to be a bit more cheerful, Homura." Mami reminded her. "You know we're no longer a bunch of undead liches."
"To this day, I still don't know how you and I pulled that off."
"Nobody needs to know." Mami cut her off, slinging her leather jacket over her shoulder and undoing her scarf. "Anyway, why'd you call? You're not one for parties."
"I need you to explain to me what this is." The black-haired girl showed her the story in question, allowing Mami to examine it closely.
"Hehe...oh dear." The girl chuckled. "It seems you have a bit of a situation here, no? Chocolate syrup and...oh my-"
"E-enough talking about it!" Homura snapped. "What is it and who wrote it?!"
"...oh, right. You never had time to become a fan of anything, did you?"
"A...fan?" Homura pondered the meaning of the term for a moment; she knew what it was, but she'd never found the time to enjoy TV shows, books or anything of the sort.
"Heh. I'm personally a 'Creamy Mami' and a 'Magical Momo' fan." Mami chuckled, before whipping out a tea cup and a thermos, pouring herself some tea. "That story you're reading now, it's a fanfiction."
"A what?"
"A story, about characters people like, written by fans." Mami clarified calmly.
Homura gave her a flat look. "I'm do not comprehend."
"...if I were to write a story about, say, a book character I liked, that would be fanfiction." Mami explained, sighing. "Homura, you've seen fans before. Remember that convention we went to?"
"You mean the one where that strange girl in the red cloak mistook us for...she called them cosplayers?" Homura scratched her head, understanding slightly more.
"Yes. Those are things made by fans. You- well, we- have fans."
"Who would want to watch us?" The black-haired girl inquired, confused.
The blonde girl looked aside, eyes narrowed.
'For a sharp girl with almost years of experience over me, Homura really is dense.'
"We're magical girls with cool powers."
"And if I recall, we were also liches." Homura reminded her.
"People enjoy suffering." Mami shrugged. "You've seen Hamlet, right?"
"Ham...let?"
Mami sighed. One of these days, she'd need to take Homura out to see a film or something. The girl really needed to get out more.
"...okay, you people need to get educated. Especially Madoka." The blonde girl climbed back onto her motorcycle. "Climb on."
"Huh?" Homura stared at her. "Mami, what are you doing-"
"I'm going to introduce you two to the world of fanfiction!"
"If all fanfiction is this lewd, then I highly refuse-"
"It's not and as your sempai, I order you to read it with me." Mami interrupted her.
"That's not how it works-"
"Homura." Mami uttered firmly and harshly, in a tone which Homura recognised as the one she would take when she wasn't going to take any more talking back.
She immediately shut up.
"Good." The blonde smiled. "Now, let's get going, shall we?"
"...I already have a feeling I won't like the road you're leading me down, Mami."
Mami frowned slightly. "Oh, Homura. Have a sense of adventure, will you?"
With a twist of her hand causing the engine to rumble and Homura to tightly grip her sempai's waist, Mami began to drive off to the Kaname residence.
And thus began an introduction into the world of fanfiction and all other sorts of pursuits a normal person would follow.
One which Homura would later come to regret.
To be continued...
A/N: Well, that was...off. If you're still here, come back for part 2, when Madoka and Homura react to more fanfiction!
So, I hope you enjoyed that, leave your ideas, comments, suggestions, reviews, criticisms and thoughts, and I hope you have a GREAT day! Until next time!