Hi! So the original title was 'Fix you' and there was a Coldplay epigrpah to this fic and everything, but I then decided that that was too much because this story isn't intended to be sad and mournful. It came to me because I was in the middle of a conversation about how engineers and builders tend to get frustrated with things that they can't fix, things like emotions. I hope that you enjoy it!
Disclaimer: Me no own.
Dedication: It's not exactly a dedication, but thanks to everyone who made sure I didn't kill my computer when it wouldn't let me upload this earlier.
Fix You
When Jake Mason was five years old his aunt died and the family parties were held in his grandmother's house, where he happened to live.
When Jake Mason was seven years old his curfew lightened and he started to realise how drunk his relatives really did get at these things, and how adults didn't drink "apple juice" after all.
When Jake Mason was twelve his uncle smashed a fireplace and Jake put it back together with common kitchen ingredients, toothpicks and a few shots of espresso to keep himself together during the twelve hour process. He also stained some of the glass so that flying birds would flash against the floor as firelight danced.
When Jake Mason was twelve years old his mother deamed him too powerful, too good at fixing things, and he was sent to camp.
"The Easter Robot?" Jake asked Beckendorf with a smile once Harley was out of the cabin.
"Hey," Beckendorf said defensively. "The jerks in Cabin 5 told him that the Easter Bunny wasn't real. I had to cover. Keep the holidays good for him."
Jake laughed. "You're great."
"What good's being able to fix things if hearts and people and dreams stay broken?" Beckendorf said in one of his moments of deep, deep wisdom. Jake couldn't find something intelligent to say before Harley ran back in the cabin yelling 'Beckendorf, Beckendorf!'
Beckendorf walked away calling "Yes little man?" but his advice stayed with Jake.
"Shit, shit, shit," Beckendorf said. He was holding a wailing Harley in one hand and trying to get a raging automaton under control with the other.
"I've got him," Jake said swooping in and grabbing Harley by the waist. Harley screamed during the handoff.
"Harley I'll be with you in a sec, I just need both hands to wrap this up," Beckendorf promised.
Jake carried Harley out of the forge and to the Big House. He got wacked on the back and spat on and nearly bit three times.
"Do you mind?" Jake asked plopping Harley down on the Big House patio railing. "What is your problem?"
"My knee's broken," Harley wailed.
"What are you saying?" Jake said.
Harley screamed it louder.
"Your knee's broken?" Jake said. It was barely scratched, but it was bleeding. And though Beckendorf was the best when it came to caring for six year old campers as far as Hephaestus went, Jake knew enough to know that blood got a kid's head all messed up and panicky.
"Here, let me fix it," he said patting his cargo pants pockets until he found the first aid kit his grandmother had sent in the mail ages ago after she'd heard about his setting-self-on-fire incident. He pulled out a band-aid and slapped it onto his kid brother's knee.
"There," Jake said. "Do I need to kiss it or something?"
"No," Harley said. "It's fixed."
"You're just scared of catching cooties from my association with Nyssa," Jake said.
"Nuh-uh. Jake fixed it," Harley said.
It may not be the Easter Robot Cover of 09, but the thought did make Jake rather content.
"Life saver," Silena hummed as Jake handed her the old ring.
"No problem," he said.
Silena examined it under various angles and lights.
"I can't believe you managed to reset that stone…" Beckendorf put an arm around her.
"Original frame and everything," Jake said.
"Amazing. Was it harder to work with an antique than it would have been with a regular ring?" Silena asked.
"Yup. Where did you get it anyways?" Jake asked.
"It was Grandmère's," Silena said. "My dad was disowned, but she managed to sneak me into her will."
"Nice," Jake said.
"It looks good as new!" Silena beamed. She wrapped her arms around him. He felt the tiny diamond press into the back of his neck. His arms closed around her awkwardly.
"I told you he could fix anything," Beckendorf said.
Silena pulled back, flashing that perfect smile that made all the other, normal guys at camp swoon and managed to get his brother into worlds of trouble.
"Well I'm glad I put my faith in both of you," she said.
"This dragon's going to be the death of me," Beckendorf said slapping his work gloves down on the dinner table. It wasn't considered rude at Cabin 9 to bring anything other than yourself to dinner, not like it was in Jake's rather well-mannered Southern family. Their plates and glasses were used to rubbing shoulders with wrenches, duty belts, rolled up plans, and even steel-toe boots that Mr D had said to take off as to not dirty the dining hall with.
"You're making serious progress though," Jake said.
"Define 'serious'," Beckendorf grunted.
"The dragon hasn't bitten anyone in a week," Harley said.
"That's true, little man," Beckendorf said poking the already squirmy kid in the side.
"You've done a lot of cleaning in the main hard drive," Jake said. "Managed to get the rust off the spine. Replaced the claws. Got the eyes to light up again."
Beckendorf was nodding. "Yeah. Yeah, I guess. Thanks man. You're good for morale."
"If he can't fix my bunk like he promised to a month ago, at least there's that," Nyssa agreed bitterly. Beckendorf laughed the kind of deep laughter that had the entire dining hall giving them looks.
"Hey," Beckendorf said. He had a very shy Harley with him.
"I've got to go, Will asked for my help. Cabin 7 did something to their lighting and..."
"Well then even Will can wait ten seconds, or you can send Christopher," Beckendorf said. "I've got a job for you."
Jake would've told him to fuck off, but Harley was there and they had a strict no-swearing-around-the-kid policy, with a no-matter-how-many-times-your-shit's-blow-up clause.
"You know how I have that job coming up?"
"With the cruise ship?" Jake asked. "Yeah."
"I may be leaving tomorrow," Beckendorf said. "May."
"Kay," Jake said.
Beckendorf cocked his head towards Harley. "You're in charge of fixing this little guy's dreams if they turn bad."
Jake was suddenly glad he'd stuck around. "Sure, no problem."
"That okay with you, little man?" Beckendorf asked Harley. "You're going to be able to sleep when I'm gone?"
Harley nodded.
"Alright," Beckendorf said. "To bed with you Harley, and Jake, you can go save Will's ass."
"Not his ass, his lighting," Jake specified.
"Well we're in one hell of a situation," Will said. Jake nodded. They were sitting on a hotel room's balcony. He could hear demigods all around them -on other balconies, in the room behind them; whispering about battle plans, about how hopeless it all looked, about whether or not so and so had been seen, praying, hoping that Percy had another plan to pull out of his butt and save them with…
"Yup," Jake said popping his 'p'.
"Beckendorf dead. Lee dead." Will choked. Jake shuffled a bit, unsure how to make that choking and interior confliction and pain stop. "Us in charge…"
"That puts our cabins into one hell of a situation more than anything," Jake said. Will laughed a bit.
"I was just wondering how we were going to follow up guys like that," Will said. He clasped Jake on the arm. His fingers were long and strong, worn by hours poured over guitars, pianos, bowstrings and whatever else. "Thanks for the laugh, man. I think Hephaestus is going to be fine," Will said.
Jake's stomach twisted. Not only because he didn't believe Will and because he hadn't eaten in hours, but because Will of all people was the one saying this. For all the poetry that had been forcefed to him since birth and all the great literature that his cabin quoted and bathed in, Will wasn't sensitive. He wasn't touchy-feely. He didn't do bullshit for the sake of bullshit, bullshit for the sake of chearing someone up, or any other kind of bullshit. He was a serious guy who said things for real if at all. He believed in Jake.
"I'm not too concerned for Apollo, myself." Jake said.
"And that's your problem," Will laughed on his way back inside the hotel room. "But don't worry. Seriously, man. You'll fix it. You'll fix your cabin."
Nyssa was sitting on her bed cross-legged, examining her hands.
"What's up?" Jake asked. "You called dibsed on that welding job for Cabin 5 but you didn't show. We had to give it to Christopher. And I got to fix Maimer for Clarisse..."
"I'll do the next one," Nyssa said faintly.
Jake tilted his head. "What's wrong?"
She kept examining her hands. Like most Cabin 9 kids, Nyssa's hands were in miserable condition. Rough, calloused, most of the skin was dead and staying that way.
Nyssa clamped them together and looked up.
"Nothing," she said shrugging her hair out of her face. She didn't do loose, floppy hair. Something was up.
"That's not what that looks like," he said. He sat down on her bed. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing."
"Nightmares?"
"Nothing."
"Code Red?"
"I said nothing Jake," Nyssa snapped. "And no, I'm not on my period. Girls aren't just moody when they're on their periods and guess what, we don't even get fucking moodier than you men do, we just have regular human emotions it's just that men are such dumbasses that they hop on the first excuse they can find to dismiss us."
Jake blinked.
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean it that way," Jake said. He honnest to gods hadn't. "I just wanted to know if I had to go raid the kitchens or something. Men are dumbasses now?"
Nyssa rubbed her thumbs agains the sides of her hands.
"Not all of you, I guess," Nyssa said.
"Who is? And what's wrong with your hands."
"They're disgusting."
"What?" Jake asked.
"They're gross, look at them."
"Not any worst than mine," Jake said raising his palms to show her. Jake had a recent burn on his, and coal marks from an earlier project. "What's the problem?"
"The problem is that it doesn't matter if your hands suck," Nyssa said. "You're a guy. If you're buff and muscly and calloused and scarred it's fine. It's cool. It's manly. People bat their eyelids because of how dreamy it is and you can proceed to sleep with the entirety of the female population."
Jake shifted uncomfortably.
"But I'm not," Nyssa said bitterly.
"You're not allowed to be buff and calloused?" Jake asked. "Nyssa, what..? Since when do you think that, or buy that crap? Who told you that?"
Nyssa didn't say.
"Nyssa," Jake said. "Nyssa who told you that you weren't the greatest girl ever? Because you know that's true, right? You're strong and capable and chill and down to earth and fearless and smart and creative and I always thought that the girls looked better than the guys in our cabin. Besides, that's completely sexist. Who the fuck told you that?"
She clamped up.
"Nyssa, give me a name," Jake practically hissed.
He wasn't exactly thinking clearly. He just knew that someone had insulted his sister and her ability to both kick ass and be a girl, and that to fix it he had to make that motherfucker pay. He also knew that that motherfucker was currently on the basket ball field and that he'd broken his jaw in the Titan War, so maybe that's where Jake should punch.
He did. And Ryan Bowyer, son of Apollo, screamed. He flailed and punched Jake in the eye. Jake grabbed the collar of his orange camp shirt and pressed him against the basketball net.
"That's for being a bag of dicks," Jake said. "Don't you ever talk to a girl again until you learn some common sense. Especially not my sister, you got that?"
"Jake!" Will pried Jake away from Ryan. Actually, Jake had no way to know it was Will but he… well, he recognised the fingers that were pulling him away. More Apollo kids were taking care of Ryan and making sure that he didn't charge Jake or bleed out.
"Jake, what are you doing," Will said. "Since when do you go punching people around?"
"You would too, if you heard what he'd said to Nyssa."
Will looked at Ryan.
"What did you tell that girl?" Will asked.
"Nothing," Ryan said through a mouthful of blood and a shitload of pain.
"He told Nyssa that she wasn't a real girl," Jake said. "Because of her work in the forges. He told her to leave the forging to the real men and that she should work on her hair."
"Oh, come on," Will said. "Bro…"
"He didn't have to punch me!" Ryan said.
"You didn't have to say that either," Will said. "Look at that, I hang out with a gang of opportunists. Opportunists that should maybe back away from each other before things get ugly..? Yes? No? Maybe?"
Jake shot Ryan one more look. He was still mad enough to break the kid's jaw if it wasn't done already, but… well, Will was there. He had a tempering presence.
"I'll go. Just... fix his jaw," Jake told Will.
"Nah, man. You fix things whenever they break. I chose. Plus I'm kind of a bag of dicks too," Will said. He patted Jake's back. "Let's get you to the forge so you can calm down."
Jake's stomach was in absolute knots.
"Kay," he managed to say.
Will lead him away.
"Verdict, doc?" Jake asked softly, trying to be funny and lighten the mood.
The rough and stern looks simultaneously given to him by Nyssa, Will and Chiron told him that he hadn't managed to do so. Truth was, he was still pretty shaken up about the dragon attack himself. He knew that he wasn't Beckendorf, that the dragon wouldn't like him as much as it had adored his brother, but to have been attacked like that...
"Fractured sternum, collapsed lung, sprained hip, fractures on both femurs and the left tibia, dislodged kneecap, severe burns that are currently healing, bruised humerus -that's your funny bone-, dislocated shoulder, broken ribs, chipped molar, sprained wrist from your landing, broken nose and possibly a concussion and/or pierced liver," Will enumerated. Nyssa whistled. Will went on, "If you weren't already so busted up Jake Mason I would slap you for the complete recklesness you treat your person with. Some of us would appreciate it if you kept yourself in one piece, preferably the piece you're already in too."
Jake's stomach squeezed.
"Don't worry Will," he said. "I… I'll be good. Take it easy. Take my ambrosia every day... fix myself up in no time."
"I don't intend to give you a choice," Will said fiercely.
For the next few days Jake got to enjoy several things. The perks of having your meals delivered to you in bed, the unquestionable privilege to sleep in, exemption from Ancient Greek classes, getting babied by his cabin mates and visited by all of camp (most of which came with sharpies and intentions to sign Jake's multiple casts), being high on nectar 99% of the time as attempted pain control and the fierce protectiveness that Will Solace dished out to his patients.
"He's even more protective about you," said a grumpy Nyssa, tucking Jake in for the night. As shitty as gender roles were, Jake was starting to notice a motherly protective urge about Nyssa. She was grumpy that Will wouldn't let her readjust Jake in his bed, change his bandages, tuck him in, feed him…
"Nah," Jake said. "It's just that we're not in a war. He's not rushing from one patient to another. That's it"
"Or that you're the patient this time," Nyssa mumbled. She insisted on 'nothing' when Jake asked her what that was supposed to mean.
"I've never seen an injury like this mend this quickly," Will said. He was examining Jake's sternum. The latter was shivering, and not just because of the cold on his bare skin.
"Told you I'd fix myself up," Jake said.
"Don't get too smug there," Will said. "You're still a fixer-upper."
"I've always healed quickly. My mom kissed my knee better when I was five, and the next day I scored the winning goal in a soccer tournament," Jake said.
Will kissed Jake's dislocated shoulder and Jake nearly jumped out of his skin.
"There. I'd kiss the rest, but that would be a lengthy and not necessarily appropriate process. Gotta go check on Katie Gardner now- toodles, Mason."
Jake could barely gather his wits to say 'later', and if he was mobile in any way he'd smack himself for his stupid rection (and then for having so much trouble explaining to Nyssa a few hours later why she had to button his shirt up for him).
"No, you don't understand," Jake said. "I'm about to murder someone."
"Good thing you're in no shape to do such thing, then," Will said.
"Not funny," Jake said. "I'm bored, I'm tired, lonely, understimulated, the cabin's stuffy, I miss humanity. Hear that? I miss people. That's where we're at right now!"
"I told you, the risk of you hurting yourself if you go out there is huge," Will said. "Not one I'm willing to take."
"I've seen you snort Oreo crumbs!" Jake said.
"Yes, but your wellbeing is different than a bet after one too many mystery shots," Will insisted.
Jake fumed for a few seconds.
"Then you can take me out yourself," Jake said.
"Beg your pardon?" Will asked.
"Walk me around camp, down by the beach," Jake said. "To the dining hall, by the forge, in the strawberry fields. I don't care but do something Will, I'm losing my mind."
Will chewed his lip. "I think that we have a wheelchair that could adapt to the angle of your legs."
"Perfect!"
"And your cabin is one of the few with a wheelchair ramp…"
"Exactly, it's meant to be," Jake said.
Will bit down on his lip for a long time.
"You'll be in a lot of pain after."
"So be it," Jake said.
"You know, if you're lonely, I'll gladly spend time with you in here," Will said. "Gods know I spend enough time at the range already."
Jake blushed.
"Nah, the fresh air is great too."
"Ah. Okay." Will said.
"But I'll take that offer too," Jake blurted.
Will grinned.
"See what you can do about flattening your hair, Mason. I'll be back with the chair in a second."
Jake could've hugged him (which would have gotten him into a shitload of trouble and been totally counterproductive given his cause, but whatever). He got to get wrapped in a blanket and pushed around Camp in a wheelchair that kept getting stuck in sand, have real conversations without his entire cabin listening in about everything from stupid to meaningful to existential, watch a sunset with the sun god's oldest son (which may explain why Will's face looked right at ease with the crazy purple, orange and red lights) and he didn't even have to put on real non-pyjama pants for it.
"Do I look good?" Nyssa asked.
"You look great," Jake said. She looked nervous. Jake had never seen her nervous about how she looked, but she was spinning in front of a mirror and checking every single angle that anyone could look at her from and she was probably going to get dizzy and pass out.
"My hair's weird," Nyssa said. "I wore it up all day and now it's weird."
"No it's not, you look great."
This is what dates did to people. Geez.
"Yes it is. There's a bump."
"Well get over here and let me fix it," Jake said.
She surprised him by actually accepting the offer.
Will was spoon feeding Jake. Usually he didn't need it, his arms were getting better, but he was exhausted.
"Jake, Jake, Jake," Harley wailed, running into the cabin.
Jake nearly spat all of his soup over himself.
"What's up bud?" he asked.
"My dragonfly broke and I don't know why," he said handing Jake his favourite toy.
The dragonfly was a present that Harley had built for his mother with one of the traiterous brothers that none of them talked about anymore. Beckendorf had had to explain to him gently that maybe flying dragonflies weren't something that hospitals were used to having in them. He'd made up all sorts of crap about how maybe the magic technology of automatons interfered with medical equipment, so now the eight year old resorted to dragging the dragonfly around and programing it so that Harley saw more of it than he did of his shadow.
"I think it's the curse," he said nearly crying. "I think it's broken because of the curse."
"No, no, no," Jake said. "You've just had it for a while. It's just old. The machinery and wiring inside and whatnot. Pass me Shane's magnifying glasses? They're hanging on his bunk."
He found a paperclip on his bedside table and put the glasses on. His wrists were shaky, but he focused on keeping his fingers straight and opening the tiny latch that showed the dragonfly's delicate machinery. He probbed the system with the end of a paperclip and suddenly the wings started hovering and the automaton took off. Harley snatched it out of the air and held it against his chest. He screamed thank you and ran out right away, leaving Jake to scream 'close the hatch!' after him before dropping back on his pillows, tired.
Will had a grin on his face.
"You laughing to me because of the glasses?" Jake asked.
"No way, man," Will said. "Those you pull off. I just... love it."
"Love what?"
"How you can fix everything. Make anything work. Stabilise the world. Give sense to nonsense. Structure shit."
"I thought that you Apollo kids were too artsy-fartsy to believe in structure," Jake said.
"No way," Will said. "Music is structure. Certain keys, certain chords, a certain way to make certain noises to trigger a certain emotion in certain people. Dance is all about choreography. Colours go together for a reason. Words and rhyme patterns and verses too. We just believe in chaneling organisation, not imposing it, you know?"
"Sure," Jake said.
"But even then, we don't get enough. There's still a lot of randomness, a lot of dirty stuff. It's why we have to result to art," Will said. "But you're permanent. I like that about you."
There was a lot of weight in that last sentence and giving antecedants, plus Will's recent shpiel on organisation and meaning... Besides. Will smiled, and Jake's heart fluttered.
Suddenly Jake felt guilty. About the fluttering. And for the faith that Will put in Jake, who as it turned out what really bad as being organised and sensable and even at fixing things. His little brother's toy was one thing, but the only thing that was completely his was unfixable and broken beyond repair as far as Jake was concerned- that something being himself.
He had nothing against gay people like Will, of course not. But he wasn't supposed to be one. Especially not according to his family. His real family, not his dad's side (families including Greek gods tended not to be too fussy about sex). He'd grown up in his grandmother's basement, living under his mother's rule but especially hers. She had a very good black-on-white idea of how the world worked and in that world, Jake was going to become a succesful nuclear engineer (the richest kind apparently) and make her a happy, comfortable great-grandmother before she was going to die (and her great-grandbabies wouldn't be coloured, they wouldn't be raised on any funky pro-health diets and they'd have Joseph or Mary as middle names). His mother probably had somekind of similar idea. His aunts, uncles, cousins... Jake wasn't supposed to be the way he was. Will could do whatever he wanted. So could Butch, Kayla, Mitchell, Malcolm and whoever else around Camp would make his grandmother activate Pray Mode. But not Jake.
How dumb was it that after taming automatons, ancient technology that was just about a fossil, rehabilitating magic golden bulls, creating nanotechnology and building some of the most succesfull explosives in Greek Fire/mortal chemistry amphibious technology, he was stuck with a huge ass flaw in himself that he was empty-handed against.
"I never meant to say that artsy-fartsy was bad," Jake said blushing. "I mean we - I mean, the Hephaestus kids- we have to be creative too. Come up with solutions, new ideas, designs… and like, you do too. Like, your songs at camp fires are great, like… really great…"
Will laughed. "All it took was ten minutes of work and you're too beat to talk."
"Yeah," Jake said nervously. "Yeah it's the exhaustion."
"If you're overdoing yourself Mason, I swear to all things Olympian and pure…"
"I'm not, I'm not," Jake said. "I'm just tinkering."
"What with?"
Jake held up the watch that Will had left there last time he'd come to check on Jake.
"Oh gods, don't waste your energy on that," Will said. "I busted it up during the War. It's beyond repair."
"Shut up for a minute."
Will looked offended for a second, and then he realised that the cabin's silence was broken by the tick and tocking of the watch.
He grinned.
"You fixed it?" he asked.
"Sure did," Jake said.
"They're not kidding when they say that you can fix anything," Will grinned.
Jake moved what he could uncomfortably, as if twitching a bit would make him more at ease.
"Here, you can take it back," Jake said.
"No way," he said. "I've proven myself to be untrustworthy with family heirlooms. You can safekeep it for me, how's that?"
"Right, because I've shown how good I am at staying safe," Jake said.
"Whatever," Will said closing the watch around Jake's wrist. "Doctor's orders, Mason."
Will was sitting next to Jake, bedridden as ever. He was starting to get addicted to nectar, it was the same concept as mortals and painkillers, so he was getting laid off bit by bit. According to the chart that Will had made, today Jake was supposed to be able to handle having no drugs in him but every nerve in Jake's supposedly-mostly-healed body said otherwise.
"Pain is mental," Will said. "You know that. You've already played Capture the Flag with a broken ankle at least once. I mean, who hasn't?"
"Me," Jake said.
"Really? What kind of demigod…?" Will shook his head. "Whatever. Just… part of the game is distracting yourself."
"I'm bedridden," Jake said. "What the fuck am I suppose to do?"
Will gave Jake a look.
"Oh gods I didn't mean to say that."
Will threw his head back and started laughing.
"I'm glad that you fixed the cabin," Nyssa said as they walked to the dining pavillion. They wouldn't be on their way to the dining pavillion if cabins 7 and 10 hadn't just staged and intervention and forced them away from the Argo II blueprints, out of the forge and were currently escorting them. Leo had insisted to be carried out, so three Apollo kids had him hoisted up in the air.
"Huh?" Jake asked. Since his accident, sometimes his hearing was still funky.
"I'm glad that you fixed the cabin," Nyssa said. "You know. Broke our curse. Got us out of that mess. We haven't had an accident in days…"
"I didn't do anything," he said. "I just gave the cabin leadership to Leo."
"Maybe," Nyssa said. "But you had to give it up."
"I never wanted it."
"Whatever, Jake," Nyssa said shaking her head. "Sometimes you have to know when to let someone else handle things, when to let someone else take control and be right. That's what you did with Leo."
"Faster, peasants!" Leo called down to the Apollo kids who were carrying him. "Mush, mush!"
"Which crazy as it may sound, I think is the best thing that's happened to our cabin since August," Nyssa said.
"MUUUUUUUUUUUSH!"
"Crazy," Jake nodded with a smile.
New Year's was probably the most celebrated demigod holiday. Christmas was fantastic and magical and nostalgic of course, and Easter implied chocolate. Halloween was great but you were toast if you didn't like dressing up, seeing as monsters weren't so much of a novelty around camp. Birthdays were fun, but they could involve some sketchy memories of getting The Half Blood Talk when you turned twelve, or ginormous and random prophecies. Valentine's Day was risky seeing as half-bloods were always losing people close to them and that couples could never get privacy on Valentine's Day (thanks to a focus group of Cabin 11 campers). April Fool's day was a public hazard, the food was just as good on Thanksgiving as any day… But New Year's... New Year's implied that if you were going to die, the number on your gravestone would be one digit higher. It implied survival and ergo awesomeness and ability and luck and probably a few awesome moments at camp.
So boy, did the party get going. And for one night, Chiron was absolutely blind so the Cabin 12 kids? They weren't shy at all. They pulled out all the food, all the drinks, all the lights and music.
Sure, there was the bummer about Percy being gone, but even that didn't seem like a big deal tonight. New year, new luck, new finds- right? Even Annabeth seemed to be enjoying herself, dancing with Piper and Katie and some other girls. The Argo II wasn't even the first thing that she'd asked Jake about when they chatted earlier, and given how tunnel-visioned Annabeth could get (they'd both spent years at camp together), that was a good sign.
As an added bonus, Jake was still on crutches, so for once there was an excuse when the Aphrodite girls came to tell him to dance. Plus Silena wasn't there to try and make the Cabin 9 kids enjoy the party, so they were all at peace and relaxed in their corners.
Except for Jake.
He'd somehow ended up alone in a corner with Will Solace, Clarisse La Rue, and a googly-eyed couple that the Aphrodite kids had recently created (Miranda Gardener and some kid named Cody from a cabin with an uneven number- that's all Jake knew). Eventually Clarisse got disgusted and moved on, the couple had spent too long without checking up on each other's tonsils and left; so Will and Jake were alone.
"Charming," Will said. "Young love at its best."
"And its horniest," Jake said.
Will laughed. "They weren't that bad."
"They were."
"Okay, they were that bad. If I'm ever that bad in a relationship, shoot me okay?"
"Okay. Return the favour?"
"Okay."
"Okay."
"Okay."
"We're screwed if we ever end up dating each other, though." Will said casually. Jake nearly spat up his drink.
"What are the chances of that happening though?" Jake asked.
"I dunno," Will said teasingly. "Personally, I wouldn't mind placing bets on it..."
Jake couldn't take it anymore. He'd been expecting food and drink, booze if he was that lucky, the chance to hit people with his crutches and maybe help Shane secure that blond girl from Athena that he'd been eyeing forever- not this tremendous guilt. The guilt of... of flirting with a guy. A guy that could be happy with any number of guys, but who was wasting his time on a completely undeserving Will.
"Excuse me," he said before walking out of the party, dumping his drink in Christopher's hand on his way out so that he could use his crutches better.
Jake was halfway across the center green when he heard Will calling his name. He froze and turned around as Will crossed the green up to him.
"What are you playing at, Mason," Will said shaking his head. "What are you playing at?"
"I'm not playing at anything," Jake said.
"You are," Will said. "You have to be. I've been flirting with you for weeks. Months, actually. And never once did you turn me down or tell me to stop. You flirt back, too. You give me looks, you smile at me at meals. I don't believe in the friend zone and the rest of that crap, I really don't. I don't deserve anything, nobody owes me shit, everyone's allowed to say yes or no and whatever else they want to say. But I do believe that people should be honest with each other. So what's your problem? Do you want me to stop? Are you not interested? I'm getting mixed signals and honestly, I'm just tired of being confused. Care to fix that for me?"
Jake's mouth felt dry. There was something genuinely broken and confused and hurt in Will's voice, and he was at a total loss.
"Good," Will said. "Good, good, good. Great, just great. I'm not even worth an answer to you."
"You are," Jake blurted. "You are but I don't- I don't have an answer."
"Then don't make me ask questions," Will said. "Just... you should've told me to back off a long time ago."
"You should've figured it out for yourself," Jake said. "You don't want me Will. I'm... I'm broken."
Will blinked.
"You're broken?"
"I didn't stutter," Jake said.
Will squinted.
"You're from Georgia, aren't you? Small town? And you're one of the few half-bloods to get christened in some sort of Church?"
Jake nodded to all of those criterias, and Will swore.
"Jake, Jake... don't do this to yourself. Trust me, it's not worth it, it's not a good idea to... oh, man... Listen to me. You're not broken, you're gay. Or bisexual, or pan, or demisexual or whatever."
What the fuck did demisexual mean?
"I don't know who told you that any of that was a problem-" Will said.
"Nobody did." Jake said. He was ignored.
"-But I'm going to punch them harder than you punched Ryan," Will said. "I can fix that for you, Jake."
"And if I don't want to?" Jake said. "And if I'm not gay?"
"Then you sure act like it around guys who flirt with you," Will said. "Which, personally and despite my strict non-belief in stereotypes, I find suspicious."
Jake blushed and hoped that it was too dark to see.
"Well then I'm suspicious and that's that," Jake snapped before turning away and walking back to his cabin.
"Fine," Will said. "Fine. But don't expect me to keep playing until you stop being stubbord and make a decision or realise who you are and what you want in the world. Even if it's a hard one. Even if it's easy. Don't expect me to just wait around while you gauge things out, because I'm pretty busted too and I don't have time to wait until I find someone to make me better."
That was a terrifying possibility, but not nearly as terrifying as the possibility of Jake being that person for Will.
"You're alright, Jake. The only way you're broken is that you think you're flawed," Will called out again. Something in his voice made him sound as if he was desperately searching for more things to call, more reasons to make Jake wait and listen. But no. He turned back to the party.
Jake walked too fast, he was too flustered and frustrated, his mind was racing with all the things that he could have said instead of all the things that had come out of his mouth... His crutch got stuck in a root by the hearth -not nearly as bright since Hestia had stopped visiting- and he tripped and fell and hit his head against the stone hearth.
The countdown to the New Year's had been at 'seven'.
Jake was laying in bed again suffering from a case of déjà vue that was so severe, it may be terminal. And of course since the Argo II's construction was in full swing, Jake had kicked Leo and Nyssa out as soon as he'd been conscient so that as much of the work force could be out there at the same time.
So he was surprised that anybody was coming into the cabin midday... until he saw that it was Will. Oh.
"Knock, knock," Will said.
"Who's there?" Jake replied weakly. He was nervous as fuck, but Will didn't look super comfortable either. His hair was a mess and his blue eyes seemed... dulled down.
"You know, I was really guilty once they found you. I shouldn't have let you walk out there alone on crutches," Will said. "Sorry."
"It's not your fault, I'd done it before. Besides. You were mad."
"Yeah, and try as I might, I guess I was too mad to remember what I said that night," Will said. "I hope that it wasn't too bad."
"Nah," Jake said. "But you were mad."
"Yeah, that I remembered," Will said. "I was the medic who treated you."
"Oh," Jake said. That Nyssa hadn't told him. "I have a concussion."
"Yeah, I know. Like I said... I was the medic who treated you."
"Oh. Right."
"You're on your last day of bedrest, right?"
"Right."
"Any symptoms?" Will asked.
"Only the throwing up on the first day."
"Which is probably because of your history of concussions," Will said.
"You didn't come here to talk about my brain wiggling around in my skull," Jake said.
"No, but I'm surprised that you remembered that," Will said. "What a concussion is..."
"I do listen when you talk," Jake said. "Which is why... Look, I'm really sorry Will. I know you've been flirting and I've been leading you on and then I ran away the other night. It was a pretty lame thing to do."
"Yeah," Will said. "Yeah, it was. I guess... I don't know. I got really scared at the idea that you didn't think of yourself as a great person. And then I got a bit offended too, probably. I mean, if you don't like gays I'm screwed."
"That's not what it's about."
"I know," Will said. "You know, my mom wasn't happy when I came out."
"She wasn't?"
Will shook his head and he sat down at Jake's side.
"No. But I think that she was especially mad because she knew that I'd have to fight against people to be who I am," Will said. "After the first guy, she came around. So don't worry about your family, okay? Worry about you and where you're going, whether or not you're happy."
"But that still leaves me to worry about the first guy," Jake said.
"It does," Will said.
"That's a lot to worry about," Jake said, sitting up.
Will grinned, "I can fix that."
And he leaned in for a kiss. A really awesome kiss, not those crappy spin-the-bottle game kisses that always ended up happening at various camp events. Not like that time he and Katie had kissed on a dare. Not like his first kiss, behind the elementary school with Lizzie Buccanan. Like a real kiss that Will's various literature snipits could describe as fireworks, sunshine, fire... A real intense kiss with rough fingers toussling his hair or slipping down his neck. One that Jake got into as well. His hands slipped up the sides of Will's shirt- just the sides.
Will pulled away from the kiss just enough to talk. He and Jake were only inches apart and judging from how entwined their limbs were, that wasn't changing. "Cabin door's open. Windows too."
"I can fix that," Jake said. With a push of a button near the headboard, curtains were drawn around Jake's bunk and that was that.