Chapter 1: Meeting You
6-year old Santana Lopez is tough for a kid her age. She doesn't ask for her help unless she really needs to. She refuses to cry even when the dark scares her because she knows she doesn't have anyone to wipe the salty liquid away. She knows that her parents are almost never home and that sometimes, the giant house she lives in can be pretty lonely. She knows that if she looks out the window, she'd see parents and their children. So she doesn't do that because she doesn't want to feel that horrible feeling that makes her want to cry. It feels like something's wrong with her heart. She knows that it feels like it's breaking so as much as possible, she avoids the windows, scared of the feeling. But one day, a day she will never regret, she feels so sad that she looks at the window and looks longingly at the playground near the house. She decides to go and promises to herself that she'd be back home before sun down.
She's a little afraid of the world outside because her parents always told her that she has everything she needs inside the house and that there's no need for her to go out. The outside world is full of monsters they say. But monsters don't exist. Santana knows this because she got up one night and threw her closet doors open and found nothing but clothes inside. Still, she's scared. But she's also lonely and the sound of the children laughing sounds really nice. So she shakes her head and straightens up her back and sneaks out of the massive Lopez house.
The first thing she thinks of when she steps outside is that this world is noisy. But Santana embraces the sounds having been alone and quiet for hours at home. Her small hands form fists as she marches to the playground. One more thing about 6-year old Santana is that she's smart. She'd watched people cross streets on the flat screen TV so many times that she knows how to. Still, she's cautious, afraid of getting hurt.
Finally, her wide, curious brown eyes take in the playground. She watches as mothers kiss the red thingy on their kids' knees and elbows and wonders in awe when the kids giggle, forgetting it hurts. She watches as big kids climb bars and smaller kids pops out of the slide. The merry-go-round is full of kids and someone's older sister is pushing it making the children shriek in joy. Finally, her eyes land on a lone child in the sandbox.
It's the first time she laid eyes on Brittany.
Santana feels something foreign inside her. Her hand goes right above her heart, wondering why it's beating so fast when blue eyes meet hers. Her stomach is going all funny. But she momentarily forgets the weird stuff happening inside her when she recognizes something in those sparkling blue eyes. The girl is lonely too, she thinks. She slowly moves toward the girl, feeling like the way she does when she looks out the window. Santana decides that she hates that look. It seems so out of place on a pretty face. The girl is looking at her, surprised. She stands up and brushes off the sand from her dress. She's taller than Santana and she has the most beautiful blonde hair Santana has ever seen. The brunette felt like she's looking at the sun when the girl smiles at her. Suddenly feeling shy, Santana looks down, blushing.
"Hi." She mumbles out.
"I'm Brittany Pierce. Nice to meet ya." Brittany says. Santana looks up and sees Brittany looking at her, waiting.
"Santana. Santana Lopez." She extends her tiny hand to Brittany the way she sees her father do so many times at the hospital when he meets someone. Brittany smiles wide when she utters her name and she takes that as a good sign. Now, she's looking at Santana's hand curiously. "You're, uh, supposed to shake it." Brittany laughs and Santana feels embarrassed. She's about to put down her hand but then she feels Brittany's hand grasp it tightly. It feels wonderful to be touched like that. Sure her Papi would pat her on the head and her Mama would kiss her on her forehead. But Brittany's hand is warm and steady in her hand. Papi and Mama's touches feel cold. It's more of a routine than affection. Unwilling to let go but shy, Santana lets go of Brittany's hand.
"Why are you alone?" The question instantly makes the smile on pretty Brittany's face disappear and Santana regrets it. "Sorry." She mumbles out.
"No. It's okay. The other kids say that I'm stoopid and that they don't like to play with stoopid people. I don't really know what it means but I don't like it." Brittany's face drops and Santana instantly hates that look on her. So she takes off her shoes and sets it neatly beside the sandbox and jumps in it. Brittany's drying to make a castle but the sand won't hold because it's too dry. She opens her backpack and grabs the water bottle she took from the fridge before she set out on her journey. She pours the contents on the sand. She then gathers the sand and forms the shape of a small but fat tower. She compresses it, doing her best to form the shape. It comes out a little lopsided but when Santana reaches for the small red flag beside the small shovel and pail and sticks it into her makeshift tower, Brittany beams at her. She notices a missing tooth but Santana can't help it. She smiles a big smile.
"You 'ave a missing tooth too!" She points at Santana's gaping hole. "Did ya give it the tooth fairy? I did and I got a dollar for it!"
"What's a tooth fairy?" Santana asks confused. Brittany gasps dramatically and Santana can't help but feel like she's missing something big judging from Brittany's horrified look.
"Didn't your mommy tell you what a tooth fairy is?" Brittany asks out of pure curiosity. She watches Santana's eyes turn older and she wonders briefly if she time travels. She's about to ask when Santana smiles sadly at her.
"Mami's almost never at home and when she is, she's always busy." Brittany's mouth drop open to form an 'O'.
"So that's why you're sad!" She exclaims. Santana has no idea why Brittany suddenly knew but she's more interested in the tooth fairy thing.
"So, what's a tooth fairy?"
"Oh, yeah! You put your tooth under the pillow before ya sleep. But first, you have to make sure that you sleep really well coz if you wake up, the tooth fairy will disappear. But if you sleep really, really well, tooth fairy will take your tooth and replace it with a dollar." Brittany smiles proudly.
"Really?"
"Really, really."
"Okay, I'll do that after I lose another tooth. I threw away the old one."
"Yay! And then we can save money and built our own big castle!" Santana chuckles. It feels nice, she decides, to be surrounded with smiling faces even if it's just one. Brittany's smile is more than enough.
"Stana?"
"It's San-ta-na, Blitty." Brittany giggles.
"You got mine wrong too! It's Britt-any." They try each other's names for a while until Brittany comes up with a solution.
"Can I just call you S? And you can call me B. So it's easier." Santana agrees after a couple more tries, finally giving up. Brittany is overjoyed, jumping into Santana's arms.
"We're friends then!" The blonde says. Friends, Santana thinks, sounds really warm and good.
"We're friends." She says quietly. Not really knowing what to do with her arms, she settles with sitting still until Brittany pulls away. After that, they play their little hearts out.
Santana thinks that smiling so much is weird but she can't stop herself. She wonders if this is what it feels like to have friends and to have fun. She wonders if this must be what he kids in their massive flat screen TV must be feeling. Either way, she's glad that she decided to go out into the world.
It's almost sunset when they begin cleaning up.
"Mommy says that I have to be home when the sun turns orange."
"You mean sunset?"
"Right." There's a sad look that crosses Brittany's face and Santana is quick to make it fade away by grabbing Brittany's hand. Nonetheless, it returns when blue eyes land on her.
"What's wrong, B?" Santana asks, a little worried that she might have said or done something wrong.
"Will I… Will I see you again tomorrow?" Brittany asks, timidly. Santana thinks it over. It's Tuesday tomorrow and her parents will most probably be gone. So she smiles at Brittany and nods. Brittany lets go of Santana's hand and instead raises her pinky finger.
"Pinky promise that I'll see you again tomorrow?" Santana hooks it with hers.
"Pinky promise." Brittany begins to pull her finger away but Santana holds strong. "Only… Only if you pinky promise that you'll wait for me." Brittany's blue eyes soften and she smiles her big toothless smile that Santana is sure to dream about tonight.
"Pinky promise."
Santana hates lying. Bad things always happened to the people on TV who lied. And because she doesn't want a missing limb or a long nose, she tries and cleans the entire house and tried to wait for her parents. She's already halfway to passing out when she hears them at the door. Tiredly, she stumbles her way to the front door. She opens it slowly, suddenly nervous. Mrs. Lopez looks utterly surprised to see her peeking shyly from the other side of the door. She enters and picks up Santana.
"Oh, mija. Why are you still awake?" Santana welcomes the contact with open arms as she buries her face on her Mami's shoulder.
"Santana?" She hears Mr. Lopez's voice beside her.
"She was waiting for us. And why does the house look unusually clean? Did Jenna come today, mija?" Santana shook her head. She waited for her Mami to set her down.
"I cleaned." She muttered. "I have somethin' to tell you but… but I don't want you to be mad." Mr. and Mrs. Lopez shared a look, a little worried. Mrs. Lopez bent down to Santana's level.
"What is it?" She says softly to the sleepy girl. Santana looks down at the ground.
"I was at the playground today." Before her Mami could say anything, she continued on. "But I was home before sunset. I didn't stay for very long. I brought water and even the sandwich Mami made for me. I was really careful. I'm sorry." She says, guiltily. "But I met a girl, Papi, Mami. And I pinky promised to meet her there tomorrow."
"Mija, we specifically told you not to go out." Mr. Lopez says sternly to which Mrs. Lopez agreed. "We wouldn't know what to do if something ever happened to you."
"I know that and I was extra safe. This house is too big sometimes, Papi. And those little kids seemed to be having so much fun." This time, Mr. Lopez's eyes turned soft.
"Oh, mija. You know we're working for your own good, right?" Santana nods at her Mami's statement.
"Can I please go back tomorrow? I'll be really, really careful. Pleeease." Santana begs.
"You're 6, Santana. You can't go there alone. And nobody can take you."
"Jenna's coming tomorrow and since I cleaned the house, she can take me to the playground. Please, Papi. Please, Mami. I pinky promised." The last word gets caught in a yawn. Santana rubs her eyes and that does the trick. Unable to resist and feeling guilty, Mr. and Mrs. Lopez sighed simultaneously.
"Alright, mija. BUT you have to promise me something." Santana brightens up and smiles her big smile.
"Anything, Mami."
"Jenna's only taking you there. She's going to give you your lunch. She needs to leave early tomorrow so will you please ask your friend's mom or guardian to take you home?" Santana nods excitedly. "Alright. Time for bed, it's long past your bedtime." This time, Mr. Lopez picks her up, hugging the little girl close to his chest, trying to convey how sorry he is for having to leave her alone at home.
"I love you, mija. I'm sorry I can't be around much." Santana sleepily smiles. She rarely hears her Papi talk to her so she treasures these moments.
"It's okay. I love you too, Papi."
Santana dreams of a dog, a backyard, her parents, and Brittany. She dreams peacefully.
Brittany is a bouncing ball of energy the next day. She's up and about as soon as the sun rose. Right now, she's bouncing on her sleeping parents bed, trying her very best to wake them up.
"Mom, mom, mom, mom, mom, mom!" She exclaims and then takes a breath. "Dad, dad, dad, dad, dad, dad!" She hears her parents groaning and her dad pulls the covers up.
"Honey, your daughter…" He mumbles.
"Oh no, she's your daughter too." Mrs. Pierce groans out.
"Engel, it's too early." Mr. Pierce mumbles out. Brittany pouts and her parents don't have to look at her to know that she is. Brittany stops jumping on the bed and slumps down, sitting in between them. Mrs. Pierce sighs.
"What got you up so early, sweetie?" Pouting, Brittany looks at her.
"I have ta go see S." Mrs. Pierce smiles as she pats the space beside her. Mr. Pierce's eyes are closed but there's a smile on his face.
"Oh? And who might I ask is this S?" She says. Brittany's smile is dazzling.
"She's my friend!"
"And is she nice?"
"She is! And she's really smart too. She built me a castle coz I was sad. But, Mommy, she's sad too and I don't like it when she's sad so can we pretty please eat breakfast now?"
"Don't you think it's a little too early, honey?" Mr. Pierce says, wrapping the little girl in his arms. Brittany willingly burrows into her father's arms.
"'S warm." She mumbles. "I pinky promised S that I'd be waiting for her and we don't go back on promises right Daddy?"
"Mhmm." Mr. Pierce hums, smiling at his wife. Their child's innocence is simply too adorable to resist so he hoists Brittany on his shoulders and bounds out the door to the kitchen. Brittany is squealing joyously and Mrs. Pierce is laughing.
"You guys go play, I'll cook breakfast so my baby can meet up with her friend."
"Down! Please." Brittany says happily. Mr. Pierce complies and Brittany runs to hug her mother's leg.
"Thank you, Mommy." Mrs. Pierce chuckles and bends down to kiss her daughter's forehead before heading to the kitchen.
Brittany trusts Santana. And yeah, she only met the other girl barely a day ago but the blonde can't help but feel like she's someone she can trust. So Brittany trusts Santana but she can't help it. She's a nervous bundle when her mom takes her to the park. They sit down on a bench nearest to the sandbox.
"Calm down, Engel. She'll come." Her mom tells her. Brittany relaxes beside Mrs. Pierce.
"Mommy?"
"Hmmm?"
"What if she doesn't show?"
"Oh, my dearest. She pinky promised right? Trust that she'll come."
Fifteen minutes later, Santana is still nowhere to be found. Brittany at this point, is close to crying. She stands up on the bench and desperately scans the playground. There's an awful feeling inside her and she puts her small hand over her beating heart.
"Mommy, my heart's not going dum-dum." Mrs. Pierce looks softly at her daughter. "S will come. I know it." Brittany says but she sounds like she's convincing herself. She stands on her tippy toes just in case she's not seeing everything. She sees different kids. She sees happy kids, and the kids who called her stoopid, and the kids who sometimes smiled her.
And the she sees Santana and Mrs. Pierce watches her break into this really huge smile.
"B!" She hears the brunette exclaims, instantly seeing her. Brittany jumps from the bench and runs as fast her legs can take her towards S. She launches herself into Santana's arms. The brunette, still not knowing what to do, stands as still as she can. She can feel something nudging her above where her heart is and she smiles.
"I can feel your heart, B." Brittany pulls away, her cheeks a rosy color.
"It stopped going dum-dum, you know. I thought I wouldn't see you again." Santana smiles.
"Silly, B. I pinky promised, remember?"
"I know but you were taking soooo long." Brittany whines.
"I'm sorry. But I'm happy you waited."
"Of course, I'd wait, I pinky promised too, remember?" Jenna watches the exchange and thinks that this must be the most adorable thing she has ever witnessed. She had never seen Santana smile so fully. Truthfully, she was scared for the little girl. God knows that dull eyes don't belong in the body of a 6-year old.
"B, there's a taller version of you coming toward us." Santana says, cautious. Brittany giggles, spotting her mom.
"That's Mommy, S."
"Oh." Mrs. Pierce immediately drops down to their level and looks at Santana. Santana bashfully looks down at her feet the way she does when she's nervous.
"Hello." She mumbles.
"Hello. You must be S."
"Santana. Santana Lopez." She mumbles, sticking out her hand.
"You're supposed to shake it Mommy." Brittany says. "S told me so." Mrs. Pierce chuckles and grasp the tiny hand inside hers.
"Nice to meet you, Santana. I'm Brittany's mommy. Susan Pierce."
"Hullo, Mrs. P."
"Take care of my little girl, okay?" Santana nods, smiling at the older woman. Mrs. Pierce smiles back and turns to talk to Jenna. She agrees to taking Santana home and when Jenna tells Santana, the brunette smiles and it reaches her eyes.
"I'm going to work now Brittany, Santana. You guys stay where the caretakers can see you, okay? I'll pick you guys up before the sun turns orange."
"Sunset!" Brittany exclaims. Santana beams proudly at her and Brittany blushes.
"Right. Keep safe." Mrs. Pierce waves at one of the caretakers in the playground.
"We will, Mrs. P." Santana says softly.
"See ya later, Mommy." She hugs her and Santana briefly wonders if it's warm in Mrs. P's arms. The older woman pats her on the head and Santana smiles brightly.
They meet Quinn sometime during lunch.
Brittany and Santana are sharing their lunch beside their half-finished castle. They decided to take break when Brittany's stomach grumbled and Santana giggled. Brittany wanted Santana's Chinese takeout and Santana wanted to try what "bey-con" tastes like so they decided to share. Santana is wiping the rice off of Brittany face when a green eyed girl comes up to them.
"S? Is she an alien?" Brittany whispers to Santana who's looking at Quinn like she's waiting for the other girl to jump at them.
"Hello, I'm Quinn Fabray. Can I join you? The kids over there are stupid." Santana tenses at the S word. Brittany's face drops and her eyes turn sad. The brunette hands her lunchbox to Brittany who looks at her, confused. The small brunette stands to her full height. She's a couple of inches shorter than Quinn but her glare is withering. But Quinn is stubborn. The little blonde crosses her arms and raises an eyebrow. Santana's brown eyes are burning with a feeling that makes her want to set something in flames.
"Okay, one, you DO NOT say the S word around here."
"What, the word stu—…" Santana takes a warning step forward and she's angrier than ever.
"No one who plays in our box is an S word." She wavers. "And B doesn't like the word." She mumbles. Quinn's eyebrows shoot up, taking a peer on Brittany who's behind Santana. The blue-eyed girl did look upset.
"Hi." Quinn says softly. Brittany looks up at her, her blue eyes teary. She looks so sad that Quinn instantly gets what Santana was saying. The brunette is watching her warily. Brittany stands up. She's easily the tallest of the three. She takes Santana's clenched pinky with hers and she responds by squeezing it.
"Hi." Brittany says tentatively.
"I'm sorry." Brittany smiles.
"I know. I'm Brittany Pierce. S can't say my name properly and I can't say hers so we're S and B." Santana relaxes.
"Santana Lopez." Santana says.
"Quinn Fabray. I guess you can call me Q?" Of course, Brittany beams with excitement.
"B, S, Q! Like barbecue!" She exclaims. Santana smiles and lets Brittany pull Quinn into their box.
Quinn learns days later that Brittany believes in the stuff she used to believe in. The girl believes in unicorns and tooth fairies and elves. She'd like to say it's stupid but every time she comes close to it, Santana glares at her. And yeah, Quinn doesn't like a sad Brittany probably not as much as Santana hates it but still.
She learns that Santana's a very sad kid and sees how when Brittany smiles, Santana's a little less sad. She learns that Santana's the mean one and Brittany's the kind one which makes her wonder how they're friends. But then she watches them smile at each other and Quinn thinks that maybe it's possible. So she decides to stay with them because they feel better than home does. Santana learns her story later and ever since then, the brunette's a little nicer.
So all in all, Brittany's the nice and happy one. Santana's the mean and protective one. Quinn's the bossy and observant one. How are they friends? No one knows.
It's a couple of weeks later when Santana first bleeds.
The trio was minding their own business like usual. They were building castles and telling scary stories that would always make Brittany grasp Santana's hand almost painfully. They were about to eat their lunch when Brittany insisted that they wash their hands first. Quinn and Santana, knowing that they won't be able to refuse, simply nodded and let themselves be dragged to a faucet. It is then that a fat kid, a mohawked boy, and another fat kid approach them. The boy with the weird hair cut blushes when he sees Quinn and Santana raises an eyebrow.
"Azimio…" Santana hears Quinn mutter, her green eyes glaring daggers at the big monster. "He's a really big S word." She whispers to Santana. "He's really mean." The look on little Quinn's face tells Santana that he did something to her. She tenses but Brittany on the other hand does something completely different. She smiles widely, the way she does when she's about to meet new people, and bounds in front of the big, fat kid before either Quinn or Santana can warn her.
"Hello. Are you lost? Did an elf trick you? They can lie really well you know." The silence that follows after Brittany's statements kills Santana. And then the laughter comes.
"Dave, did ya hear that?" Azimio says in between laughter. Brittany's shoulders shake and Santana's fists clench in response. Dave laughs along but the other boy backs off when Quinn glares at him.
"Uhh, guys…"
"Sup, Puck? I know ya wanna laugh, this kid really is stupid." Azimio obnoxiously says. Brittany's head bows and she doesn't see Azimio advance toward her and push her down to the ground. Quinn rushes to Brittany's side, silently letting the infuriated Santana to handle the idiots. Santana takes one look at the tears on Brittany's face and something snaps inside her. She doesn't understand what's happening but she knows that she needs to hurt this Azimio. She lunges at him blindly and manages to scratch his face.
"OUCH!" Azimio shrieks. Dave, terrified, refuses to be beaten by a girl. His beefy arms grabs Santana's waist and throws the thin girl to the ground.
"S!" Quinn and Brittany's voice chorus. But Santana doesn't hear them. Everything is red and she attacks again, this time throwing a punch to Dave's face. The boy crumbles to her feet. Acting purely on instinct, Santana turns to Azimio and kicks him between his legs just like what the people on TV do. Sure enough, tears run down the mean kid's face and he can barely breathe. It feels oddly good and for a second she's terrified of what she just did. But then she hears Brittany sniff and that changes.
Santana turns to Puck who raises his hands defensively. He seems to get the message and besides, he didn't laugh the way the other two did. So Santana settles on glaring at him.
"Nobody," she hisses. "Nobody calls Brittany stupid. Because she isn't." She spits out and Puck nods his head vigorously. He drags Azimio and Dave away. Santana immediately turns to Quinn and Brittany. Quinn is helping Brittany up.
"B? Are you okay? Did you get hurt?" Brittany is unresponsive. She's staring at something downward and Santana wonder why is her left knee hurting. She looks and there's red. She gaps at it and she realizes that that must be what Brittany is staring at. Quinn gasps beside Brittany and immediately runs to her backpack.
"B?" Santana says, worried. But Brittany takes her arm and leads her to the nearest bench and pushes her to sit down. Blue eyes are so sad and it something clutches Santana's heart. Quinn appears beside them, a wet towel in hand. Brittany grabs it and dabs it as softly as she can on Santana's bleeding knee. Still, Santana winces when the cold towel hits the wound.
"Owww." She mutters. Brittany looks at her, worried. Tears are streaming down her pale face. She kneels in front of Santana and blows the wound. Surprisingly, the pain eases and Santana relaxes. Brittany cleans the wound quietly. When Quinn hands her a bandage, Brittany applies it.
And then she kisses Santana's knee.
Heat flares from the point where Brittany's lips touched her and spreads to her entire body. Santana blushes scarlet. Her black and white world bursts into a thousand different colors and life courses through her body. She feels something tug at her heart and her stomach feels like there's something flying in it. The pain vanishes and Santana is completely at a loss. It's an amazing feeling, she decides, to be kissed by Brittany.
"Mommy always kissed my wounds every time I got hurt." Brittany explains. "You got hurt, S. You're bleeding because of me." Brittany's head bows and fresh tears take over. Quinn glares at Santana, silently telling the other girl to do something. Santana doesn't need to be told twice. She jumps out of the bench and bends to peer at Brittany's face.
"Hey. It's okay." Santana says, a little desperately.
"It's not." Brittany argues. Santana is at a loss for words. Nobody ever cried because she got hurt. So instead she takes Brittany clenched hands and pulls her up. She squeezes Brittany's hand until it relaxes. And she places it above her wildly beating heart. Brittany feels the strong dum-dum and she sniffs.
"You're okay?" Santana smiles and uses her other hand to take Brittany's pinky in hers.
"I'm okay."
During their entire life, Brittany and Santana treasures five kisses, five very important moments. This is one of them. Let me tell you the rest of their story.
A/N: I was in the middle of Shine when this story popped into my head. Tell me if you liked it or hated it. But please, no flames. :) Title's from Lady Antebellum's If I Knew Then. On the other hand, OMG, the Rumor Has It and Someone Like You mash up is breathtaking. Someone give them an Emmy!
(For her. Hi. I just want to say that I'm waiting for the day that I can finally believe you when you say that you're proud of me.)
For the rest of you people, see the review button? I'm waiting for you. ;)
Brittana,
theangel1710