Hello. This is my first time writing fanfiction so I hope it went well. Sorry for spelling or grammar mistakes. The talent leaves the room!

Red and warm blood is running down his arm. Feeling the sensation Hiro feels overwhelmed by its beauty. Taking the razor he makes another gush on his tigh. He feels more alive than he ever felt and the pain makes him forget all the nightmare he has just woken up from. No, not a nightmare. A memory which he will never forget. He can still remember their dirty hands on his body, telling him what a good boy he is while stuffing their dicks in his mouth. How they were hitting him after they were done. He was just 12 when all this happened.

" Hiro, are you okay?"

At hearing his brother's voice muffled by the bathroom's door he wakes up from his reverie. He doesn't want to face his beloved brother. He doesn't want to be seen like this, dirty and bloodied, by the one he loves the most in this world because Tadashi doesn't deserve to be bothered by someone so useless like Hiro.

"I'll be out in a sec!"

Hiro waits 'till he hears that his brother went back to bed to start treating his cuts. He cleans and the blood and takes the blade with him when he wents out.

In the bedroom he sees Tadashi in his bed smiling sleepily at him. Hiro can't stop himself from envying the way his brother smiles so carefree. Tadashi has a perfect life. He goes to one of the famous college and works on his degree in robotic engineering. He has a lot of friends and he is admired by all his peers.

Hiro is just a nobody that wastes his days doing nothing. His only passion is illegal bot fighting. It's true that he finished highschool at 12, but sometimes he asks himself if it weren't better to just don't attract attention on himself.

"You took a long time in the bathroom. What were you doing."

Lying comes easily to Hiro.

"Taking a dump."

Without another word Hiro goes back to sleep.

After two weeks without cutting from that night Hiro can say that he almost feels at peace. This particular day he is working on improving his little robot that brings him a lot of cash. While working on the last details Tadashi comes barging in managing to scare Hiro shitless.

"Hiro, do you want to come with me to see my college?"

Hiro can't process what his brother was saying while he was flashing him such a happy smile but after ten seconds he realized what his brother wanted. He wanted to convince him to attend his college, to make him realize that he can use that potential for something else instead staying all day at home, but Hiro doesn't want to go. He doesn't want to meet his friends and see how well he can manage without him because he is just a useless thing.

Gazing at his brother he realizes that he is 'still waiting for an answer.

"I don't think that your school for geeks is for me."

"Come on, I know you'll love it. Plus, I know you want to see on what I've been working on."

With great reluctance, Hiro finally agrees.

Hiro doesn't know how he was convinced to try to be accepted at his brothers college. Maybe it was because of Tadashi's friends or maybe seeing his new project which made him realize how far behind he was, but, most certainly, it was because of the prospect of seeing Tadashi every day and spending time with him. He really loves him, but not an innocent love. No, his kind of love is the one that makes him lust for his own brother, but he knows that he doesn't deserve him. He is too broken, too useless for him. He was just a damaged shitty brat that can be pushed by everyone. This makes him remember how three of the students that attended the same highschool raped him. For them he was just a scrawny little bitch whom they fucked 'till he couldn't move, but he never told Tadashi and his aunt. He was to ashamed of himself and too scared. He endured for three months the abuse until he graduated.

Hiro forgot that Tadashi is in the same room as him so he jumps out of his skin when he hears him talking.

"Do you need help?"

Hiro gazes down at his blank paper, trying to think of something that he can present for the exhibition. If his invention is not good enough he won't be accepted.

"No."

"If you don't have any idea, try to look at it from another perspective."

Mulling over Tadashi's words, Hiro looks at his small robot. What makes it special is the fact that it can disassemble and assemble at will. That's when it hits him. He starts writing down with fervor.

Tadashi is watching him amused for awhile than turns back to the book he has been reading.

The night before the exhibition finds Hiro wide awake. He is too anxious to sleep. He gazes at his brother studying his sleeping form. He can't help but admire his face. He is just too perfect for Hiro. He watches how Tadashi's muscle contract when he changes his position. He has nice and defined muscles making Hiro wonder when he has the time to work out. Looking at his own arm he can't help but hate how scrawny is. He hates how he looks so fucking fragile.

Feeling bold, Hiro gets out of his bed and pads softly to Tadashi's. He lifts the blanket and gets on and cuddles close to his brother. Tadashi opens his eyes and sees his cute brother trying to get closer.

"Can't sleep?"

"No. Too anxious."

Tadashi hums and starts petting Hiro's black hair. This makes Hiro slightly relax. He looks up at Tadashi.

"I love you."

Tadashi hums and replies.

"I love you too."

Suddenly Hiro brings his face closer and kisses Tadashi. He just touches his lips with his softly. Tadashi freezes and can't help but watch Hiro. Quickly Hiro moves away to see his brother's reaction. Tadashi doesn't know what he sees in his eyes but it's enough to make Hiro initiate another kiss, this one more needier. He closes his eyes and responds to his brother's sloppy attempt at kissing. Their kiss becomes hungrier and Tadashi takes lead softly coaxing him to open his mouth, with his own tongue. He shyly grants him access and Tadashi explores his warm mouth. They pull away when breathing becomes a necessity. Hiro's big black eyes peer at Tadashi's own filled with lust.

After regaining his breath Tadashi changes their position and climbs on top of Hiro, using his hands as a support. He kisses Hiro's soft lips again, his hands snaking under Tadashi's shirt touching everything making sure to remember how they flex when he touches in the right places. They part again Tadashi removes his own shirt after removing Hiro's. He starts kissing a trail down his neck. Hiro has never felt so good before. Tadashi's soft kisses leave him feeling hotter and hotter. He can't help but moan when Tadashi takes one of his nipples in his mouth, moving to the other one after taking his sweet time. Hiro feels himself already leaking precum , his cock straining against the soft fabric. With shaky hands he tries taking them off but Tadashi tries to help him. When he raises his hips to take them off, his thigh brushes against Tadashi's cock making him shudder.

"Not fah..ir. Hah, you 'still hah…ve your pants on."

After he gives Hiro a small kiss, Tadashi discards his own pants, sighing with appreciation at not being restrained. Hiro admires his length and he shyly lets his hand to touch the tip. A small moan of pleasure leaves Tadashi loving the way that Hiro touches him.

With strength he doesn't know he posses, he exchanges their position. Hiro kisses him deeply and after they separate he kisses a trail down softly but he doesn't stop like Takashi did. He goes until he faces Takashi's hard length. He gives an experimental lick to the head and enjoys the way his whole body tightens. He slowly licks his way up on an underside vein and pushes his tongue in Tadashi's slit making a bead of precum appear which he happily licks. After another lick on his length Hiro brings his mouth at the tip and slowly works its way in his mouth. He doesn't stop when the tip hits the back of his neck making use of his nonexistent gag reflex. When he reaches the base, Tadashi puts his hand in Hiro's hair makink him hum around his cock. Hiro holds his hips from trusting in his mouth and he goes up leaving just the tip in his mouth. He gazes over at Tadashi that looks at him with lust and love making Hiro's heart beat faster and making him more excited.

Hiro starts bobing his head up and down sucking on Tadashi's shaft with new found energy. Soon he can feel how the cock in his mouth swells announcing Hiro that Tadashi is close.

"Hiro…I'm coming."

Hiro's mouth is filled with Tadashi's cum, drinking it greedly, not letting a single drop spill. After he is done Hiro frees his brother's cock with a lewd pop. He peers up and sees Tadashi trying to regain his breathing. They make eye contact and Tadashi brings up to kiss him hard, tasting himself in Hiro's mouth. He let's his hand travel down to his little brother's cock to jerk him off. He swallows every moan that Hiro makes and plays with his dick going from fast to slow, then fast again making him come hard on his hand and stomach.

After riding his orgasm, Hiro falls next to Tadashi on the bed, while Tadashi reaches for the tissues box to clean the mess on his belly. After he is done he faces Hiro with a sleepy smile.

"I love you."

"I love you too."

This time it has another meaning.

Hiro can't believe that he received the acceptance letter. He is really happy holding it in his hand and letting his aunt hug the life out of him, telling him how proud she is. Tadashi is watching him with a soft gaze, pride evident in his eyes. After he is released by his aunt, he comes and gives Hiro his own hug, whispering in his ear.

"We are going to celebrate at home."

Hiro tries to control his blushing looking down after he is released. He jumps when he suddenly hears the fire alarm, the people around him panicking and running to the fire exit. Outside, Tadashi is nowhere to be found. He looks frantically for him and sees him running towards the building on fire. He also starts running after him screaming to stop when his brother enters inside and the next second Hiro is sent flying by the explosion, Tadashi's form engulfed in flames being the last thing he sees.

The next day Hiro wakes up in the hospital, his aunt crying next to him and telling that Tadashi is dead. Tadashi's funeral passes by in a blur. He can't feel anything. He is dead inside. His sunshine, his hope, his love died and he can't bring himself to even cry in front of Tadashi's friends. His friends tell him to stay strong but what's the point. He just nods mechanically to make them feel reassured.

When he arrives home and enters the room, he and Tadashi used to share Hiro simply broke down when he saw his brothers belongings. He can't take this anymore. He can't go on without Tadashi, the only being that made him feel so loved and special.

With eyes blurry with tears he looks for his razor blade. He finds it quickly and just holds it in his hand. This action makes him strangely calm. Realizing that the blade is not enough he looked in the drawer where the pills are. He took all the sleeping drugs he could find and takes them with him in the bathroom. He stares at the mirror taking in his sad eyes and defeated face. He looks so broken. Fresh tears roll down his cheeks. He already misses Tadashi. His voice, his smile, the warm look in his eyes, his touch, his everything that made him Tadashi.

Hiro swallows all the pills without water. He lifts the blade and places it at his wrist. He drags it up his arm basking in the release that the pain leaves him with. He does the same for the other arm and continues to do so until he has five parallel scars on each arm. He climbs in the tub after he takes his pants off where he also slashes his thighs. Soon another ten scars are added to the collection. He takes his time looking at his bloodied arms. Alone in the tub he can't help but think about aunt Cass and Tadashi's friends. Tadashi. His mind is invaded by the memories he has of Tadashi. Soon. Soon he will see Tadashi and tell him how much he loves.

Hiro quietly slips out of this world with a smile thinking about his beloved.

End.