Laurent shook his head, his face kind. "Look at it this way, Bella. You're very lucky I was the one who found you."
"Am I?" I mouthed, faltering another step back.
Laurent followed, lithe and graceful.
"Yes," he assured me. "I'll be very quick. You won't feel a thing, I promise. Oh, I'll lie to Victoria about that later, naturally, just to placate her. But if you knew what she had planned for you, Bella…" He shook his head with a slow movement, almost as if in disgust. "I swear you'd be thanking me for this."
I stared at him in horror.
He sniffed at the breeze that blew threads of my hair in his direction. "Mouthwatering," he repeated, inhaling deeply.
I could hear the growls ripping and echoing around my head as he touched my shoulder. The cold touch reminded me of him, and as the wind shifted to bring his scent to me my knees buckled. I didn't feel the ground smash my kneecaps; the tears that flowed were not from physical pain.
"Thank you then."
"Excuse me?" He lowered himself to my level and raised my chin so I met his crimson eyes. When I didn't say anything, comprehension flooded his expression. "They're not coming back, are they Bella?"
I launched myself at him, throwing my arms around his shoulders and letting go of all my carefully placed restraints. I was never able to open up to someone about Edward, even Jacob. If I was going to die anyway, I might as well die with that weight off my heart at last.
Laurent put cold hands on my back, hesitantly rubbing as I sobbed. Why he didn't just bite and get it over with was beyond me. My neck was right there. "Back away now Bella, before he strikes." My hallucination Edward kept demanding things of me that I no longer had the will to do. I didn't care that I was leaving behind Charlie and Renee and Jacob. I just didn't want to hurt anymore.
After a few moments, I quieted. I leaned back and Laurent let me sit on my legs. He held my face and wiped some of the wet from my cheeks. He smiled a little. "I hate it when my food is upset."
I laughed a little as I heard more growling from my mind. "Why is that?"
He shrugged a little. "I guess it's because when I was turned, I was unthinkably happy." When I cocked my head to the side, he went on. "I had fallen in love with a vampire, much like you did. She did not return the feelings, but I was infatuated so strongly that I followed her everywhere. I realized afterwards that she always knew I was there, but at the time I thought myself quite cunning and slick.
"After a few weeks of this, she confronted me. She turned a corner one night, but didn't walk any further down the street so when I turned I ran into her face on.
" 'Come with me' she said and walked off. I followed instantly." He leaned in to me, making me lean away. I quickly lost my balance and was flat on my back on the meadow floor, hands above my head. He gracefully situated himself so all I could see above me was his face. I didn't feel any weight of him, though.
"She brought me to a small apartment." His face came closer to mine. I closed my eyes, and his scent and voice flooded my head with the vision of that night, and drowned my hallucination out. I could see it was if it were painted. The only difference between his story and my imagination was she and he was replaced with Edward and me.
"She started to touch me." A cold finger ran its way across my abdomen. It tickled, but in a new, alien way. His hand wormed its way under my shirt so his entire hand lightly traced my abdomen and ribs. I could feel him shivering as I shivered.
He leaned in closer, and once his lips were next to my ear he whispered, "She started to undress me." As the words passed his lips, his hand went higher. The tips of my fingers went tingly. He traced the under wire of my bra for a second before pushing it up. My breathing became ragged, almost panting.
"She started to kiss me." His lips met the flesh of my earlobe. He trailed down my neck, across my shoulder and up my collarbone. His hand made its way to the small of my back and lifted up so that I was hugged to him.
"And then, in my moment of pure ecstasy," he licked from my collarbone back up to the side of my neck. Unconsciously, I draped my arms around his neck. I could feel his teeth cut flesh, his venom pour into my bloodstream, but the pain was different that I imagined. It was painful, but at the same time it was pleasurable too.
He started to growl as I hugged him to me. I could feel my life draining from me, I could feel myself screaming, but I was still in that small apartment with Edward.
Before I was lost completely to my fantasy, Laurent broke away from my neck. The burning sting of his venom, now free from the suction of Laurent's thirst, instantly started to fight its way through my bloodstream.
And then Laurent was gone. My hands were left, shaking in midair in a hug like position.
I screamed dully as the pain of the venom overwhelmed the pleasure that Laurent was giving me and the numbness death was bringing. Death and immortality hung over my system like a delicate scale. One had to win out, but it was uncertain which one.