Warning: I was high enough to see the stars when writing this. Thought it was funny so I decided to post it. If you think I should contine then review
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"Godammit Sherilock!" I heard Jawn call from da hole. "Get back hear now!"
But how can I go back when da smell. Da smell of smells wraps around my nose and is moving my forward. It a new smell dis one. No apples of crunch or smoothi chocolate. No no dis one is da one. Mmm. "Sherilocck!"
"Jawnnnn," I says "I seee it Jaaawn!"
And I did. Dat beauiful brown piece on da floor. Smells like something new. I crawl forward. Mmm.
But then. I hear it.
BNAM BOMN BOANNNNNN
"RUUUUUN SSHEEEERLOCKKKK!" Jawn squealed and went back in da hole.
I gape and scrawll the othda way and barely managed to get under da big sitty when I see da loud children running past me. More steps follow "Ma!" I hears the annoying one screah. Her loud vocce makes me cringe "Facking Greg and his friend are ruining ma make up!"
"Shut da fuck up Molly!" Her ma with da voice says "Tryin watch da doctor." I hear the squeakerss squeak in laughter. Mollay gruts and stomps da floor and leaves and I hold onto da seat so I don't become a fly.
"I luv this little game of ourss" says da friend and they tip toe across the kitchen to follow da sis. It silent again. I breath and count to 1234 and run across da dirtay floor and grabbed the brown shat color beautiful thing while ignoring Jawns screaming. Mm. What a tecture this is. I place the thing on ma back and run even faster then them kids do across the floor. Wings i feel i have. The earth starts to dance and I hear da brat screach "MAAAAAA" and I shake and my babay falls. I grunt in annoyance and pick up da goldren crusty again and run, now ignoring both Jawn and da brats screachin.
"You nugger!" Jawns voice rings as I enter da home. "You tryin to die!"
I drop my goods onto da floor "Jawn look" I say and in awe sniff it. MMmm heaveanly. Jawns sniffs too.
"Ohh," he sniffs in pleasure "Whadda treat" and da bastard licks his lips and opens his mouth. I jump him and we roll on da floor and with my 3rd arm hold em down while 1 and 2 blocks his moves 4 and 5 punch him.
"Jawn you idioit!" I yells then gets off of him befors he retaliates. I run and sit on my bae and stare as Jawn looks offendedd.
"You an your shat!" he says like a Molly and scripples off to his tube.
I look at my baby and study it. I sniff and molest it. It half cold half hot so only an hour old. I sniff closer and smell many scents so it humanized made by seasonings. Dark brawn with crustys of black edges suggest it was cooked in grease. I lick it and spices spice myself. But it taste so goooood. My crumb, my boo, wa very itty bitty. Mas. there was more outtaside so i mus-
"Ello slug." I hears a fagot call me. I turn around and protectivly cover ma thing. "Brought dinner or naw?"
"Sawlly." I says. "No. It mine. Studying." I move closer to my thing. Sawlly rolls her eyes. "Ands I not a slug. I a high funtion roach."
"I dosen't care." she said anoyed "I'm hungry peaceees." she crawls to da exit and I watch as she sits down and just stares. Doing hers safe thing i dunno. Sawlly thinks she da smartiest of us all. She stares and counts even though you cans clearly hear dem peasants in another room screachin. After a whiles I see her slowly tip a toe outta. I too turns around and picks up my bae once again and carry it to my bottle caps. My room. I throw her in dere and crawl toward Jawns tube but half a way dere I hear a loud piercin scream from da brat again.
"Oheeeermygawd!" da ho screams and Is peer out da hole and see Sawlly frozen undero her. I chuckle as I see da fear and horrors go onto sassssy Sawllys face and conitune crawling "MMMAAAAAAA! Ma!"
It werent long till I heard da crunchin of Sawlly.
Finally.
"Wut was dat?" Jawn says as I approachedd.
"Sawlly got plssshhed" i lafe.
"w-Wut!" says Jawwn. Ufgh a here we go. "Dat not funny Sherilock don't cha care of our peeps! Sawlly was a smarten and kind lady who was a roach by boday but a ladybugg by mind oh gawd. They killing us allll Sherilock! Ya see! Disss disss is why we mustnt go out till the darkening of the darkest dark!"
"Jawn." I says as he breaths in and a out all mad like.
"Yas?" He grrs.
"Shat up." I saw and crawl next to him. Jawn da fungus opens his mouth again but I grabbed my hair leg numba 4 and cover his mouth. "Come wiff me Jawn. I needs to collect more of dem crumbs."
Jawm blinks fast and astares at me in surpise? "Sawlly was a jusdt squashed." He hushes
I lose a brain cell "So?"
"She wast a just murdered by them tall humaines and a now, a won miunte later, ask to go bacq out for some of dem crumbs. Oh u machine!" He rants like a rat.
"Oh Jawn. Cmon. It taste gewd no? You want some cmone. Let figure outta what it issss, solve da mystery." Impossible to tern down this for whaaat!
He squares himself "No." I hear dem finality in his voice.
Whadda turd. So it is possible.
I roll my eyes and walk toward the whole that transport us to anuther world. "SHerilock!" I hear from behind me. "Sheerilock!" I round da corner and run for it. Dem humans have a gone awry and I make it under that square heat. A stuve dem call it.
ooOooh. I stare as I see a couple more giant baes seating around. Yassss. I run to da big mama and waste none of time and carry this heavy muthafucker on my back and run back. But my speed of lightening is gone by the weught of the sun on my back. Den I feel some BAUM BAUN and i feel my heart a stop in time. "Euw." I hear dem word echoes from the friend of Graham say. I look up as I feel dem disgusting child come closer to me hold ing a blank.
He kept shoving the blank in my face every inch I turn what da fuck. I can still hear Jawn screaming "SHERRILICKK" in da background.
"Cmonn u lil shit get onnn hurray before Mollay comes round." That waz all the convincacing i needed and crawled on.
"Da faq u ho!" Jawns screams fade as this duche turns the corner and flicks a them knobb and brightening lights a blinden me ooh! Da paiinn!
BLOOP! SWOSH!
I fall in dis water. Swim! I comaud my mind palace. Swimm SWIMMING I AM SWIMMING IN A HEAVENLY WHITE LAKEEEEE.
I swim like a lozer in the water "AAAAAHHH!" I hear my bro ho screams. Didn't even notice Jimm-boy left.
SPLASH!
"SHERIILOCK!" i hears the Jawn gargle next to me and jumps on one of the blanks. I too a join him.
"Boring." Da faggorita says high above us. "Daddys had enoufh a now!" and slaps something nexts to da connected box. We then start spinning a wilddllyy woooooooo!.
"JAAAWN!: I sayyss
"SHERRRILOCKKK!" cries my lil Jawn and down we go into dis hole as we hear the child laugh like a queer and we go into a blackity blanket of a mustard black.