Mike's POV

If Chief Swan ever found out about this, I was a dead man. Bella Swan was drunk. I had never seen her so drunk before. Scratch that, I had never seen her drink anything that contained alcohol before.

Jenny Donnel's birthday party was a perfect opportunity to loosen her up with some alcohol, I'd thought. Maybe, with some alcohol, she would finally see that I wasn't that bad and that I deserved a chance.

But right then I found myself wishing that Bella Swan had refused to drink. I was surprised to see how alcohol worked on her shyness, which was now completely non-existent.

She commented on everything, grumbled about Edward saying, "The bastard just dumped my ass in the woods," and chattered about werewolves and vampires, which proved she was off-her-ass-drunk, and practically laughed at everything.

Jessica laughed just as hard with her, if not harder. She never seemed to laugh with Bella around. She'd push her lips together and cast eye-rolls and annoyed 'why are we hanging out with her again' glances toward me every three seconds. Well, it shouldn't have surprised me. Jessica was just as drunk as Bella.

They'd laughed when Lauren gave them a fucked-up-morons look, they'd laughed when I said 'pudding' they'd laughed when someone had offered them a drink, hell, they had even laughed when nothing happened at all.

That and the too loud banging bad music kinda killed my mood, and the person who was holding Bella safely on his lap, Jacob Black. Ugh, why did she have to take him with her? Yeah, it probably was safer for Bella. She wouldn't drunkenly trip over her feet ever three seconds if he held her in his lap. But I still hated it.

I hated the way he stroked her hair, held her hand, and softly laughed with her, even if it wasn't funny at all.

Although he didn't say anything, and looked quite uncomfortable, he shot every single guy daring to look at Bella a glance that said, don't you even think about it.

Lauren took advantage of Bella's current state, and asked how things were between her and Jacob. Like anyone was interested, like anyone wanted to know if she was still free to take.

'Tsk .Nhummm. Me and Jake?" Bella giggled her drunk giggle and tapped Jacob's muscular chest. Damn him. Is there even a gym near Forks, I thought?

"Things are going well, huh Jakey?" Jakey, ugh. Barf.

"Yeah, really well," he repeated her words, nodding.

Really well huh? The way he looked at her, like this damn planet revolved around her, that wasn't just going really well. That was going all love-dove-perfect! But sober Bella always said they were 'just friends,' nothing more. She'd always been a bad liar.

She half-turned in his lap and nuzzled her face in his neck. He wrapped his arms around her. I scowled at him, but he didn't seem to notice.

"Hrrmm Jake, I really like you, you know," she murmured in his neck. "You're so hot."

Everyone stared at her. Lauren rolled her eyes and mouthed 'tell me something I don't know', Angela just looked at them with a knowing smile and Jessica didn't bother holding back a huge, lopsided grin. Jacob grinned like he'd just won the lottery.

"I really thought I was going to hate this wolf-stuff, but now you're so hot, I think I don't mind," Bella said.

Wolf-stuff? Was that the name of his gym, I wondered?

"In both ways," she continued, laughing again, her cheeks flushing red and her eyes sparkling. She turned to us. "That's what the whole pack has, they're so hot and they all walk around shirtless a lot because otherwise they'll burst out of their clothes if they phase, it's really like poof!"

What? She threw her arms in the air as a visual aid.

Jacob's eyes widened as he tried to cover her mouth to stop her from talking.

"Y'know," she said in a muffled voice. "Have you ever seen him shirtless?"

Jacob's hand fell in Bella's lap, his eyes wide with what looked like caution and shyness? Or shame?

Pff, you'd have to be named Jacob Black to be ashamed of that body.

"Bells, you are not taking my shirt off," he cautioned.

She ignored Jacob and looked at us, a mischievous look in her eyes. I scowled. Jessica looked like she was going to drool and the rest looked interested. A wide grin lit up Bella's face even more.

"C'mon Jakey, show 'em!" She began tugging his shirt up while he lamely protested.

"I'm not taking my shirt off in public, Bells."

Without any visible effort he pulled his shirt back down.

Bella pouted. "Please? Pretty-pretty-pretty-pretty-pretty-pretty-" as she continued the R turned into a W, making her sound like a whiny child, "Pretty please?"

She widened her big brown eyes and hung her head a little bit. It created an adorable begging-puppy-look. Jacob chewed on his lower lip and his protest melted.

That girl knew too well how to hit the right spots. I didn't want to know how many times she used his weakness like this.

"Alright," he said as he gave in, a little bit hesitant.

I deepened my scowl, but nobody seemed to feel like protesting. In fact, the girls seemed a bit too eager to see him shirtless. Hmph. I watched with jealousy as she tugged his shirt over his head.

I had known he had broad shoulders and big biceps. It scared the hell out of most of the guys, including me. But this was just unfair.

His broad shoulders were the beginning of long, muscled arms and his russet chest was smooth and muscled. His abs were Photo Shopped like perfect, all eight of them. Eight!

And even though he was sitting, no fat appeared anywhere on his entire body. I tried my best not to stare, unlike Jessica, Lauren, Katie and actually all of the surrounding girls, who were staring lustfully at him. Even Angela, who was devoted to Ben, was staring with disbelief.

I don't know what was written on my face, but it was probably mirroring my thoughts which shouted unfair!

I thought my mouth had popped open, but I wasn't sure.

"Told ya!" Bella looked around triumphantly.

Jacob seemed utterly shy, his usual grin nowhere to be seen. I bet he was blushing but his dark skin didn't show much and the dimmed light in the room didn't help either, though the thought of him being embarrassed made my grin evilly. He tried to snatch his shirt back, but Bella held it firmly.

"Nahnahnah, you ain't gettin' your shirt back," she said sternly, but a smile betraying her amusement.

'Ain't' was not a word Bella used often, and it confirmed her current state once again.

"Bella," he whined, but she wasn't paying attention anymore. She hushed him absently with hand on his mouth.

"Jake, get me another drink," she ordered him. He hesitated, but after receiving another stern glance, he sighed, stood up and put Bella carefully back on the cushions.

She snapped her fingers and pointed to somewhere in the crowd. "Fetch me my drink, sweetie."

He rolled his eyes, but a smile played around his lips. Probably a joke I was oblivious to. "Can I please have my shirt back? Everyone's staring."

She ignored his question or simply just didn't hear it and started chattering about a meadow and something sparkly, I wasn't paying attention.

Jacob rolled his eyes, muttered something about a leech and disappeared in the dancing crowd. Jessica seemed to love the story that hung on Bella's lips. She was squealing every three seconds and interrupting her with questions like, "He wanted to eat you?" and, "He jumped into your room shirtless? That's totally hot!"

Lauren, who had looked interested mere seconds ago, now watched with one raised eyebrow and disbelief was written all over her face. Angela chuckled, but didn't say anything and snuggled closer into Ben's arms.

I decided to take advantage of Jacob's absence. It was now or probably never. I scooted closer to her and laid my hand on her arm.

"Sorry, what did I miss?" I looked at the few people who were paying attention.

Bella looked at me with a beaming, drunk smile. "Edward wanted to eat me because he's a vampire and he sparkles and watched me when I was sleeping."

I raised an eyebrow and immediately understood Lauren. It required a lot of alcohol to make Bella say things like that.

"And Jacob walks around half-naked a lot cuz he's a werewolf and that's why he's so hot," Jessica added, smiling with a goofy smile.

She winked at Bella. That wasn't just drunk, that was brain damaged. I wanted to crawl in a hole and die. I was a dead man anyways.