I had a lot of people ask me to make a sequel to Glass Elevators: Worst Inventions Ever. So I did. It was kind of done up quick, and I agree with whoever said the original is always better.


He was there again.

Once again, Cloud was sent to deliver paperwork—of course, to the 44th floor. It seemed every bit of paperwork in all of Shinra always went to the 44th floor. Did anybody work on the rest of them? The name scrawled across the sticky note once again read Sephiroth, and it offered him at least a little bit of relief; since their chance encounter on the last paperwork delivery nearly a month prior, he had gotten very close to the General. Very. Close.

For those of Shinra that just didn't get the hint, Sephiroth would often spell it out—quite literally. He would stop them right in the middle of the hallway, and spell out each and every word, until whoever his victim was would mutter a small 'oh'. Whether that 'oh' was of shock, understanding, or utter fear that the Great General Sephiroth was holding the front of their shirt and spelling random words out to them, was anyone's guess.

However, the paperwork being for his boyfriend only lessened the immense fear by a small amount. He was not utterly terrified of the elevators at Shinra anymore—big glass and metal death traps that they were—but he was still afraid of being trapped in one. Luckily, he'd had a distraction during the last incident… but would he really be that lucky again?

Hell no. With Cloud's luck, he'd end up with some dickbag companion—maybe even two, but he really did not want to think about being stuck in one of those elevators with two other people—that would force him to do push-ups until he threw up.

He hadn't even eaten that morning, and the mere thought of doing push-ups for potentially hours on end made him want to hurl. And of course, the idea of dry heaving freaked poor Cloud out, and the entire thought process made him want to throw up. Really, his fears were an endless, ridiculous cycle. The elevator dinged, and he looked up from the paperwork, smiling a little—the sooner he got into the elevator, the sooner he got to Sephiroth.

And he really enjoyed visiting Sephiroth.

With a confident look on his face—and completely ignoring the urge to just take the goddamn stairs—he stepped into the elevator, and jabbed his finger into the key for the 44th floor. He hummed to himself, keeping his eyes focused on the slowly closing the door, and wishing the trip would go faster. He'd already wasted a good twenty minutes standing in the middle of the hallway in front of the elevator, and debating whether or not he was that desperate to see the General.

He was. And the secretary had even given him a chocolate chip cookie and cheered him on.

You knew you had a problem when one of Shinra's secretaries was cheering you on over riding an elevator.

A hand snaked its way into the elevator, and Cloud nearly had a heart attack—and a very severe case of déjà vu. One of these fucking times, somebody would do that, and their arm would get ripped right off, leaving a bloody, flopping limb in the elevator, and with Cloud's luck, he'd be the person in the elevator. Of course, he'd probably faint the very second a drop of blood was seen, but—

"Well, hello there."

Cloud's thought process came to a screeching halt, and he kind of wanted to die. Right there. As soon as possible. Because stepping into that already too small elevator was Professor fucking Hojo, in all of his greasy, creepy glory, and putting much more stress on "hell" than he really needed to.

And he was carrying a box of needles.

Oh dear fucking god, did Cloud hate needles. And was that—

Oh gods, it was. The damn creeper was hauling a bag full of hand sanitizer.

He shied away when the greasy man reached to press the key for the 47th floor, and wanted to cry; Hojo would be in that elevator with him the entire way. A happy little ding sounded, and the doors once again closed as Cloud made every effort to move as far away from the creepy man always hiding in the labs without being noticed.

And then the doors slammed on another arm, and Cloud had yet another heart attack. What the fuck was with people in Shinra putting their arms in closing elevator doors?

Oh. Fucking. Shit.

"Hojo."

"Genesis." The creeper (as Cloud had dubbed him) replied, an evil little grin on his face.

Cloud was positive he was going to cry, and Hojo would probably think it meant he wanted to take an experimental shot. The red-haired Commander pressed the key for the 44th floor, and settled himself next to Cloud—apparently doing exactly what the cadet was doing, and making every possible effort to get away from Hojo. This, of course, resulted in him being in Cloud's personal space.

What if Genesis blew up the elevator?

Cloud did not like fire. He didn't like most things—rabbits, squirrels, fire, water, smoke (because obviously that meant there was fire somewhere), Sephiroth's closet, and Hojo were right up there that day on his 'run screaming, now' list. And he couldn't run, or scream, because both would attract attention and there was nowhere to run. Genesis cocked an eyebrow at him, and Cloud, for a very, very, very brief second, wished there was a window so he could jump out of it.

Yes, Cloud Strife would face his fear of heights, death, pavement, and flying, just to get away from his Commander. It wasn't weird. It was survival instinct.

The elevator moved at about the speed of molasses in an igloo, and Cloud desperately squished himself against the glass wall, staring straight ahead at the keypad with determination. Next to him, Genesis withdrew his copy of Loveless, flipped it open, and started reading, his elbow just barely touching Cloud's ear.

…He was pretty positive Hojo was moving closer, too.

"So," Creeper started in his irritating, and utterly horrifying voice. "Genesis… how are you today?"

"I will not test anything, Hojo." Genesis snapped, moving slightly closer to Cloud.

"Oh, but this one," Creeper reached into his box and withdrew a rather large needle with purple fluid in it. Cloud felt his stomach turn and pushed himself closer to the window. "Will make it so you never have to eat again!"

With a sigh, Genesis snapped his book shut and turned a glare on the man. "Why the fuck would anyone want that?"

"So they'll never go hungry." Hojo replied with a frown. He dropped the needle back into the box, and withdrew an even bigger one with blue liquid. "Try this one."

"I'm not trying any of your fucking experiments!" the Commander half-yelled. He turned to Cloud, then back to Hojo and jerked his thumb at the cadet. "He's a cadet. Test on him. Leave me the hell alone."

With that, he turned back towards the doors, reopened his book, and proceeded to ignore the poor cadet next to him, who was feeling very much like his world was caving in on him. He would never see Sephiroth. Hell, he would never even see—he looked at the display over the keypad—the 23rd floor.

…Alright, that last part was a lie, because they'd already gotten past the 23rd. But as Hojo edged closer, holding up a needle, Cloud was positive he'd never see the 44th floor. The box of needles was placed on the floor, and Hojo withdrew yet another needle with a dark swirling blue and green liquid, and took a step towards Cloud—who tried to hide behind Genesis. Another step, and Cloud clenched the paperwork so tightly to his chest that he had a feeling he may sever his fingers on paper. Yet another step, and he slammed himself back into the wall behind him, eyes wide. Hojo grabbed his arm and pulled his closer, and he attempted to yank it back.

Just as the needle was being held up, Cloud did something he didn't often to.

He fought back.

"No!" he shrieked—so loudly, in fact, that Genesis jumped and dropped his book. "No, no, no! I am not testing that shit!"

He slammed his foot into Hojo's shin, then slammed himself back into the wall again, holding his arm close to his chest. He watched the greasy man collapse to the floor, wailing about how some little 'brat' had broken his leg, and frankly, Cloud did not give one shit.

He was too busy hyperventilating because Genesis was staring at him.

"Who the hell are you?"

Cloud stared at him blankly for a moment, debating whether or not he should even answer. And then, of course, he remembered the Commander had a temper, so he sputtered a little squeak of a reply. "C-C-Cloud S-Strife, sir."

Genesis' features softened, and Cloud thought he was in the clear; he internally cheered to himself—he'd faced both Genesis and Hojo in one day. And then Genesis was frowning at him, and he was trying to get the glass wall to absorb him.

Cloud did not like to be frowned at.

"You're Seph's boyfriend, aren't you?" Genesis mused, cocking an eyebrow. "Or was his name Clarice…"

What the fuck was with everyone thinking his name was Clarice? He had checked, and it was definitely a girl's name. He was not a girl; he had the boy parts to prove it, and he had touched them that very morning in the shower. And then he had freaked out, because it was just so disgusting looking and—

"He kicked me in the leg!" Hojo hissed from the floor, glaring at Cloud from his spot on the floor.

"Oh, get the hell over it. You're at least seventy years older than him." Genesis replied, rolling his eyes.

"I am not—"

Genesis slammed his book into the side of the man's head, and Cloud watched in absolute horror as Hojo toppled to the floor unconscious. If Hojo died, would anybody really care?

…Probably not.

That decided, he turned his attention back to Genesis, who was grinning down at him in quite a maniacal way. "U-Um…"

"Seph wasn't lying. You are absolutely adorable." The Commander murmured, resting a hand against Cloud's cheek.

Of course, if he had known that such a small action would make Cloud consider throwing himself off of the roof, he very well may not have done it. However, Genesis was not a mind reader, and Cloud was too busy figuratively pissing his pants to tell him he was afraid of him. How would one even go about that? 'Hi, you scare me shitless. Please don't touch me.'? That would probably lead to death by fire. And Cloud had heard that was a very painful process. Cloud did not like pain.

The elevator dinged, and Cloud pushed his way past Genesis, hop-skipped over the hopefully-dead form of Hojo, and bolted out of the elevator and down the hall. He stopped only when he reached Sephiroth's office door, gasping for breath and hoping he wasn't going to keel over and die from the sudden sprint. He had made it there in one piece, the elevator had not stopped, and he had not been injected with any mystery fluids. He did a little celebratory dance, stopping only when a nearby SOLDIER started laughing at him. Embarrassment didn't sit well with Cloud; he wasn't afraid of it, but it did make him want to throw up.

Then again, most things made Cloud want to vomit.

He knocked on the door, then opened it and stepped inside the small General had his arms crossed on his desk, and was hunched forward, head resting on his arms. His normally alert cat-like eyes were closed, and to Cloud, he looked absolutely adorable. Like a defenseless non-scary creature that he desperately wanted to hug and cuddle up to. However, he knew that the man hadn't been sleeping well, so he quietly placed the paperwork next to the General's sleeping form, and turned to leave. He could always call his lover lat—

"Cloud?"

Cloud tripped over his own foot and face-planted on the floor in surprise. He heard the chair scrape obnoxiously loudly across the floor as Sephiroth scrambled to his feet, but he was already back up and tackling the man, crushing him in a tight hug. The General leaned down and placed a quick kiss to his lips with a smile. He scooped Cloud up and sat him on the desk, kissing him again. Cloud giggled cutely—something that made him feel like a girl, and was probably why people apparently thought he was one.

"More paperwork? Did you take the elevator?"

"Yes." Cloud replied, bobbing his head in a happy little nod. Then he pouted up at his lover, and waved his arms around. "Hojo was there."

Immediately, Cloud's arms wrists were being held, and Sephiroth started looking his arms over, turning them this way and that. The blonde pulled them back, clutching them to his chest. "I'm fine."

A kiss landed on his forehead and he blushed, looking down at his lap. Not long after meeting Sephiroth, Cloud had discovered a rather sweet—and occasionally slightly annoying—side to the man. He was very much like Angeal was with Zack—constantly worrying that he'd get hurt. It was amazing to Cloud, whose only source of caring had been from Zack for a long time. It was also a side that the cadet happily kept to himself.

"Hey," Sephiroth murmured, resting his chin on Cloud's messy spikes. "I love you."

"Love you, too." Cloud squeaked, blushing brightly, and thankful they were in private. In public, people would stare. He hated when people stared.

They were silent for awhile, sharing small kisses, and Cloud trying his hardest to ignore what felt like a spider crawling up his back (which was just a loose thread in his shirt, they discovered, after he freaked out and peeled the clothing off, and twisted around in an attempt to find the offending eight-legged horrible creature). Every once in awhile, Sephiroth would reach past Cloud, and take a quick phone call. Cloud didn't mind; he was happy to be there, and to him, phone calls were no big deal.

Mostly because he wasn't the one making them, though. He wasn't afraid of phones, per se… but he was afraid of talking to people he didn't know on them.

Sephiroth set the phone back down on the hook again and smiled down at Cloud. "What would you like for dinner tonight?"

Cloud hummed to himself in thought, drawing his lower lip into his mouth and chewing on it. Most things, he wouldn't eat—spaghetti (looked like brains), macaroni and cheese (afraid he'd choke on it), and cereal, to name a few—but Sephiroth didn't seem to mind. "Soup…?" he asked meekly, cocking his head cutely to the side.

"Soup it is."

Cloud abruptly sat up straight, effectively slamming his forehead into Sephiroth's jaw. "Can we take the stairs? Please?"

Sephiroth nodded and rubbed his jaw. Sighing in relief, Cloud kissed the General on the chin, and nuzzled into his neck. It wasn't that he was completely afraid of elevators again. It wasn't even that they may stumble upon the dead form of Hojo, or (worse) the living, conscious form of the creeper. Or the fact that Genesis was lurking that floor somewhere, or that there had been needles in that elevator. Or that there had been hand sanitizer in it, and he had almost died.

Cloud just… wanted… to walk. Yes. That was it. Walking was Cloud's new favorite thing to do, and he would enjoy trekking up and down the many floors of Shinra's HQ, as long as it meant he'd never have to ride one of those glass elevators again.

Even though he was afraid of stairs, too. And railings, heavy doors, and those giant plastic numbers portraying what floor he was on really weirded him out. And what if he ran into somebody halfway up a staircase? Was he supposed to turn and run the other way?

After a brief debate with himself, he decided the stairs were his best bet. They couldn't break down, and he wouldn't be wedged in the corner with a complete creeper, and a lunatic who had a temper. He could definitely learn to love stairs.


Cloud, you wuss. :c

Although I'd freak out if I was stuck with Hojo, too. So I can't blame him for that. Well, there you go. It's a short sequel, but it is a sequel. Thanks for reading. Review~?