Please note! 1. English is not my native language. My native language:Polish. Errors will appear.
2. This story has more to do with theories of Polish fans than hetalia. (Welcome to the Polish fandom)
3. Hetalia does not belong to me(if it were PrusPol/PolHun would be Canon)
CONGRATULATIONS! You just invested in a unit of FELIKS ŁUKASIEWICZ! To ensure that You, the owner, you are using the device in the best way. We took advantage of the privilege of writing of this manual and we strongly recommend that you read it before you try to enable the device.
Technical specifications:
Name: Feliks Łukasiewicz. It also answers the "Polen", "Poland", "kurwa"
Age:19 (as a country 1052*)
Date of birth: 11 November
Place of origin: Warsaw, Poland
Height: unknown
Weight: unknown
Length: more than the Prussian model
Your device FELIKS ŁUKASIEWICZ is supplied with the following accessories:
One (1) green military uniform
One (1) sports tracksuit
One (1) folk costume
One (1) horse
One (1) unit of WÓDKA**
Two (2) units package sticks
Programming:
Your unit of FELIKS ŁUKASIEWICZ is equipped with the following features:
Chess master: you're going to the Championship playing chess?This model is perfect for you!FELIKS ŁUKASIEWICZ not only teach you how to play chess, but will show you a few clever tricks how to cheat in accordance with the law!
Teacher riding:We all know that when it comes to horses is there is no better without reason, FELIKS ŁUKASIEWICZ is shown with the horse and his famous ride was the scourge of the whole of Europe!
Fashion Advisor: you do not have what to dress?Wondering what you look better?Quietly! Years of practice and our pole has become a master of making people models world class!
A shield against Russia:are you afraid of the Russians? Quietly!With FELIKS ŁUKASIEWICZ no Russian to you not come close!
Worker:clogged toilet?Paint the walls? replace light bulbs? Is this a specialist!The times of communism have taught him that all this fix!
Removal your FELIKS ŁUKASIEWICZ from the packaging:
Your unite itself gets up. However, when he don't want to wake up we have included the following list of ways to wake up the device and ready for reprogramming.
1. Turn on any German/Russian rock guarantee immediate unlock system and plenty of flying objects in the air, life-threatening and/or health
2. Get a unit of RADMILA HORÁKOVÁ***,to she screamed for him to set off his lazy ass out of bed. Alternatively, you can call unit GILBERT BEILSCHMIDT but the company is not responsible for the damages
3. Activate an attached unit of WÓDKA and pour it into the smell will wake up FELIX ŁUKASIEWICZ and will reprogram to.
Reprogramming
After successfully waking FELIKS ŁUKASIEWICZ you will have the ability to reprogram it. Its modes are:
Cheerful (default)
Boss (default)
Kombinator****
Drunkard
The Patriot
Suicide (closed)
Standard modes are Cheerful and Boss. Both are very simple programs: In "Cheerful" unit still has a big smile on your face,he does not control the movements of his body and always something asks. In mode"The boss"he still those commands without using the words "please", "sorry" and "thank you" not accepting the word "not" and offending as a woman when his order will not be made
If you have problems it is set the mode to "Kombinator" that turns on when you ask him for advice. In this mode, the unit is able to find the solution to any problem with the help of proverbs: "as it's stupid but it works it is not stupid"
W"Drunkard" FELIKS ŁUKASIEWICZ is sebiksem*****. To enable it you have to dress up in the attached to a set of sports tracksuit. In this mode will steal, fought on the estate,he sang like a professional rapper and of course drank. At your expense. Before you enable this mode we recommend previously familiar with the contents of your wallet, block the bank account and portfolio to hide in the safe of the latest generation.
His last unlocked mode is a "Patriot". If you want to make your unit has included this mode we recommend you turn on the news channel,historical film or patriotic songs. In this mode, FELIKS ŁUKASIEWICZ is actively social activist willing to do anything for their fellow countrymen and also a good negotiator and expert in all European languages.
Your unit has a single locked mode-"Suicide" can be unlocked by placing it in "Patriot "and then taking it to the Auschwitz concentration this mode, the unit will attempt to commit suicide which unfortunately is not possible because the unit is immortal. To turn off this mode we recommend you read him the book of the greatest deeds of Poles or bring ELIZABETA HÈDÈRVARY to talk with him.
Relations with other entities
List the relationship FELIKS ŁUKASIEWICZ is variable, but these are the most famous:
ELIZABETA HÈDÈRVARY:both units friendship for many years. They are both good friends and for centuries to protect each other's and have their own day of friendship (23 March)and quickly and easily can become a pair. Unfortunately, women unable to have children so there thought about the small Polish-Hungarian children.
TOLYS LAURINAITIS: centuries of history common Polish and Lithuanian by both entities know each other. Właściwie TOLYS LAURINAITIS is one of the few units that are able to withstand with FELIKS ŁUKASIEWICZ and though their relationships are not now as good as it used to be you can to restore Polish–Lithuanian Commonwealth back on the map
GILBERT BEILSCHMIDT:This two is a perfect example of the relationship of the dog with a cat.(or another version of the relationship of English-French). For centuries to argue and partitions/battle/Prussian Homage/Battle of Grunwald are their daily "conversations".However, when guaranteed to break a strong barrier of hate You can expect a very sharp romance and a weekly change of bed linen.
FELICIANO VARGAS: the two likely met during the marriage of the King of Polish, Sigismund the old and Bona Sforza, Although there are suspicions of knew already earlier. Both FELICIANO VARGAS and FELIKS ŁUKASIEWICZ are optimistic and are addicted to your favorite food. Probably it's just a friendship, but who knows ...
Cleaning
Your unit to hate wash and you have to use all methods to catch it and wash. We recommend that you only hide the supplied horse before bathing because the FELIKS ŁUKASIEWICZ can use it to escape.
Feeding
FELIKS ŁUKASIEWICZ is not too picky when it comes to food. Likes Polish dishes and even during crisis is able to eat inedible food or withstand two days without food (experiences during wars)
Rest
FELIKS ŁUKASIEWICZ has a very adjusted sleep mode. Forget about taking a NAP during the day because he will not give you to sleep.. Goes to sleep on time about 21 and gets up typically at 6 am (If he will still be asleep, see: " removal of FELIKS ŁUKASIEWICZ with packaging")
FAQ
Q: So ... my unit came with a bottle filled with a mysterious substance. What is this?
A: This is the unit of WÓDKA.
Do not drink this.
Q: He sits in the corner and gasps every few minutes!
A .: Most likely was rejected by ELIZABETH HÈDÈRVARY or other object of 's nothing you can do, because if you try to he throws something in you. Just wait.
Q: HORSE unit fled together with FELIKS ŁUKASIEWICZ
A: Fortunately, each unit is equipped with a GPS, so that you can locate them anywhere in the world!Just call or send an email to customer service and enter the eight-digit code of the shipment, which you received in the order confirmation email.
Troubleshooting
Problem: One morning you woke up and you saw that your unit is sitting a horse dressed in the wings and armor waving a sword, calling you a pagan and asking where GILBERT BEILSCHMIDT and TOLYS LAURINAITIS.
Solution: Congratulations! Unlocked the hidden mode "HUSSARS" your device! In this mode, FELIKS ŁUKASIEWICZ will try to destroy all non-Catholic churches and also tried to kill unit GILBET BEILSCHMIDT.
Please note that although you can use any method to get out it from "Hussars" , first to return it to "Patriot" and then you can reprogram it to another mode.
Problem: Instead of the man in the box, you have a girl in a folk outfit. She smiles all the time, he likes to take care of you and asks about DANIEL HÈDÈRVARY and TATJANA LORINAITYTĖ.
Solution: Oops, accidentally sent you the female version of Poland!This form of your unit is a young woman but is as cheerful and talkative as the original. Unfortunately it has only one mode, and there is no option to connect in pairs, so if you want to replace it, in this case, simply call our customer service department.
Final remarks
With enough love, care and patience to romantic movies, FELIKS ŁUKASIEWICZ will be a good companion. Good luck and we hope you will like your new unit!
*The Christianization of Poland refers to the introduction and subsequent spread of Christianity in Poland. The impetus to the process was the Baptism of Poland the personal baptism of Mieszko I, the first ruler of the future Polish state, and much of his court. The ceremony took place on the Holy Saturday of 14 April 966, although the exact location is still disputed by historians.
**Vodka
***the unofficial name of the Czech Republic. According to the Polish fans of Czech Republic and Slovakia are siblings Poland
****wheeler-dealer?Spiv?welsher?Someone who is clever and usually unfair actions,to help him achieve a goal;negative word.
*****Stereotype:young person, primitive, dressed in sports tracksuit or overly elegant in a suit with a white t-shirt and gold chain with a likeness of The Mother Of God, with erect hair (if it has hair),overly manicured and charred, with the swashbuckling smile, infantylnym (childish) approach to life (car, parties, girls).