A/n: This has been in my head for quite a while and will not leave me alone until I post it up.

Pairing: Mello X Matt

Rating: K+ for some words.

Summary: Matt finds comfort in five year old girls hugs… and Mello's.

Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note

Matt slumped down on the wet grass. It's been so long. Too long. He stared at the children playing outside the Wammy House. He took a drag form his cigarette and slowly exhaled. How long had it been since it was Mello and him playing out here? What happened to all those times? Sometimes Matt had to look at his old pictures to remind himself that those times had actually happened. But now Mello was in the United States solving some case that was so top secret that even Matt couldn't know about it. It's been five years since L died and that was about all the information Matt could get out of Mello. Why did he have to be so goddamn complicated? Matt took another drag form his cigarette.

Rodger invited Matt back to the Wammy House because the one of the kids got seriously hurt and so Rodger had to give her immediate medical care. He left Matt in charge of the orphanage while he was gone. It's been two days since the incident and Rodger insisted that Matt stay as long as he wanted to. Matt decided to split this evening. He didn't want to stay here too long. Too many good memories. Memories that will never come back. He sighed and released another puff of smoke. He thought about Mello. He thought about him a lot these days. And every time he did, there would be a lump in his throat. Then the waterworks would begin. Sometimes, Matt would hate Mello for making him like this. But then that hate would dissolve into regret. Why didn't he stick with Mello? He should've stayed by his friend's side. Mello… why did he have to be like this? Matt missed him so much. So much it hurt both mentally and physically. It would take great effort to suppress tears and the dreams that he would have would haunt him for the rest of his life. But that wasn't even the worst part. There is this ton of weight in the pit of his stomach that wouldn't leave. It happened ever since Mello left. No matter how many video games he play, how much food he ate, how many comedy movies he watched, the pit always stayed. But he couldn't cry. Not here in front of all these children.

Matt closed his eyes and drifted into a reverie. What has it been? Two hours since he fell asleep against the wall of the building? When he opened his eyes he found children screeching and running all over the place. Then something nudged his foot. Matt looked down and saw a red ball the size of a cantaloupe next to his leg. A little girl about the age of five scampered over and picked up the ball. She looked up at Matt with a big smile. What Matt saw on her face shocked him. She had a large scar on the left side of her face. It was scar by fire. One that someone else he knew had. Immediately his face softened. This was the kid that had the emergency.

"Hey there sweetie," Matt said. He crushed his cigarette and stuffed it in his pocket. Can't smoke in front of little kids. Can't litter either.

"Hi!" She chirped. She had neck length black hair and most of it fell on her face as a poor attempt to cover her scar. Then she got a good look at Matt. His goggle-clad face to his puffy vest. Then she did the most heartbreaking thing Matt could think of. She ran away with the ball. Matt sighed again.

Great now I'm scaring away little girls.

He closed his eyes again. After a few minutes later he felt eyes on him. It was a weird talent, but whenever he got the feeling he was being watched, he knew. And he was always right. He opened his eyes and through his goggles he can see a girl with short black hair. She'd come back. He couldn't help but break into a smile. He removed his goggled; the girl came closer and sat right next to him.

"You're Matt right?"

"Yeah, how'd you know?"

"Rodger told me you took care of all the children while I was in the hospital," she stared at him and then smiled, "Thanks!"

"No problem kid," Matt smiled, but then frowned, "Wait. You know my name but I don't know yours,"

"My name is Raven but Rodger tells me to never say my real name to anyone," Raven says in a hushed tone, "but I want you to call me by my real name,"

Matt grinned again. He never went outside much but he was good with kids for sure.

"OK Raven, why are you talking to me when you can play with your friends?"

"You're unhappy," she stated simply

Matt seemed as if he had been struck in the stomach.

"What?" he reasoned, "Why would you say that?"

"Am I right?"

Matt looked uneasy. His emotions were uncovered by a five year old. He was an open book! He shouldn't be surprised thought. The Wammy House only had the best of the best. He finally decided to give in. No point in lying anyway.

"Yes," he sighed for the umpteenth time, "yes I'm unhappy? Happy now?"

"Why would I be happy? You're sad!" she cried.

Matt hung his head.

"Why?" she asked.

"Why what?"

"Why are you unhappy?"

Matt thought a bit and decided that it was a lot more complicated. "It's a long story,"

"It's okay, I have time, I did all my homework beforehand," but once she got a look of Matt's miserable face, "you don't have to though,"

Matt immediately calmed down after she said those words. If he started talking about Mello, he'd start crying.

"I was unhappy once," Raven said in a small voice, "when mommy and daddy used to fight,"

"You had parents?" Matt was bewildered. He never heard of a kid who actually remembered their parents. Matt himself,f never remembered his own.

"Yeah, but sometimes I wish I didn't. Daddy wasn't nice to mommy,"

"Hey, I don't mean to interrupt but, when did you come to this place?" Matt looked in her direction.

"Last month," she started again after a while, "Daddy used to drink this brown stuff a lot. Then he'd get mad for no reason and hit mommy,"

Matt listened patiently. He was better at listening than telling.

"Then one day daddy disappeared. Mommy said he wouldn't be back. But I know he died in an accident. Everyone thinks I don't know what's happening but I do," she paused. There was trickle of water in the corner of her eyes, "That's when mommy got real sick. Eventually she died," A single tear streaked down her face and she immediately wiped it away. "But not anymore!" she brightened, "Rodger took me in and now I have friends and everything!" She smiled. Matt wished everything would be as simple as that. But the truth is that it isn't. Mello made things complicated.

"I wish I could be in your place Raven," Matt said.

"Why?"

"You have such a simple life," Matt stated, "I don't even know what's happening in mine." And without intending to he launched into his life story. He told Raven about when Mello and him were kids and how they would prank Near. He told her about his video games, Mello's fetish for chocolate and that sometimes that normal chocolate wouldn't calm him down. That he needed strawberry marshmallow flavored chocolate. And you know what? This time he didn't cry. But that was only because he talked about the glory days.

"… Then everything changed. That day, Near and Mello were called into Rodger's office. We were still kids. Rodger told them that L was dead. You have no idea how much Mello freaked out. He wouldn't admit it but he was so shocked. Even Near was downer than usual. And so was I. But as a few days passed we got over it and Mello and Near were whisked away somewhere I'm not supposed to know. It wouldn't have been so bad but Mello didn't even say goodbye. He just left. No note or anything…" Matt's voice unintentionally cracked. And there was that stubborn lump stuck in his throat again. He fought back tears by blinking them away. Raven had been listening patiently, nodding occasionally.

"Then what happened?"

Matt regained his composure. "I stayed in the Wammy until I was sixteen. I couldn't take it anymore. I was just so lonely! I moved out and got myself an odd job. I could afford an apartment so I stayed there. It was not great but I lived. The only thing that bothered me was Mello. It was like he planted a seed in you or something. Not a second passed when Mello wasn't on my mind. I –" Matt's voiced cracked again. The tears were pushing too far.

"I miss him so much," Matt croaked, "but that isn't it. I don't just miss him; I love him. I love him so so much," He could feel something warm and heavy on his torso. It was Raven giving him a big hug. He hugged her back and buried his face in her small head and did the thing he wanted to do the most since Mello left… he cried. He couldn't believe it. Here he was, back at the Wammy House, pouring his heart out to some five year old girl that he just met and then spilling his tears all over her tiny little head. But Matt couldn't help it. He needed something better than a picture of Mello and a pillow to cry on. He cried and cried for what seemed like eons. And Raven didn't pull back. She cried along with him. Then they both finally pulled back.

"I'm sorry," Matt squeaked, "I used your head as a sponge,"

"It's okay," Raven said, "I'm sorry made your clothes all wet,"

Matt smiled sadly and wiped his tears. Raven did the same. Then Matt decided to ask her.

"Why did you hug me?"

"Hugs can cure the most amazing things," Raven said, "especially when someone is sad. Mommy told me that."

"Your Mom's right, they made me feel a whole lot better," Matt meant it too. He did feel better, but that ton of weight in the pit of his stomach still stayed. They stayed there in a silence. It was a comfortable silence. Matt didn't even think. He just stared at the orange-purple sky. The sun was setting.

"Matt," Raven said, "I have to go now. The others will be wondering where I am by now."

Matt nodded.

"You will be here tomorrow won't you?" Her green eyes pleaded.

Matt shook his head. "I'll be taking off today,"

"Oh…" Her eyes were shiny again. They wavered in the sunlight. "Well bye Matt." She turned around to leave but Matt held her hand. He turned her around and kissed her on the very top of her head. The exact spot where he had cried.

"Thank you," Matt whispered, "Raven, for being there,"

Raven wrapped her hands around the man again. "Your welcome," Then she took off into the orphanage. Matt watched her run until she became a tiny dot. Yes, he was very far away from the main building. Matt continued to gaze at the sky. The first stars of the night were beginning to uncover themselves. Matt was about to fall asleep on the spot. He won't bother to pack his stuff. He'd leave in the middle of the night. After he got some rest. And he almost did except for this one voice. A voice he could distinguish from a million people. A voice that Matt had grown up with. A voice he wouldn't trade for the world.

"Matt,"

Matt didn't do anything at first. He was frozen. Could that be? Could it really be? He saw a figure about ten feet away. Blonde hair, blue eyes, leather all over. His first instinct was to run up to him and punch the daylight out of him. So he did. Well, most of it. He did run but he didn't hit him. He just stood there within arm's reach, staring like an idiot. He didn't even bother to ask how he got here, or why or when. All that mattered was he was here. And that was all Matt needed to know.

"Mello," Matt whispered. He tasted the words off his mouth. It felt so good say it. Then Mello did the one thing he wanted to do since he left Matt… he cried. He leaned into Matt's chest and cried on it. At first they were little sobs but they soon turned into tears. At first Matt was shocked. He didn't expect this at all. But then he remembered Raven,

"Hugs can cure the most amazing things, especially when someone is sad. Mommy told me that."

Matt brought his arms around Mello and held him close. Mello his playmate. Mello his life long friend. Mello the person he loves. Mello wrapped his arms around Matt's waist. They held him tight. As if he let go, the wind would sweep him away. They held on to each other for a while and then Mello started talking.

"Matt," he sobbed, "Oh Matt,"

Matt who was a foreigner to the crying Mello just squeezed him tighter.

"Matt I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to leave you without telling. I – I – I'm so so so sorry Matt, please," Mello cried.

Matt who couldn't take it anymore cried along with him.

"It's okay," Matt whispered. Then he did the boldest move of his entire life. He tilted Mello's face up. He'd never seen so many tears. He wiped away all the tears that the blonde had. Then he brought both their lips together. It was sloppy. Tears mixed with saliva and their mouths wandered completely off. But it was nice.

"Matt," Mello finally whispered, "Matt I – I – I love you Matt," Then he buried his face in Matt's chest.

"I love you too Mels. I've loved you ever since I met you,"

They both hung on to eachother like they were their own sanity.

Mello? Oh that's right. Mello did not appear out of thin air. He finished with his training and came back to fetch Matt. He wasn't that different form the red-head. Same nightmares, loneliness, and emptiness. He didn't care if getting Matt would blow his cover. He would boldly go up to Matt and snatch him away with him where ever he needs to go. But that's not what happened. Instead he broke down on his lover. Just goes to show what happens when you bottle up your emotions for too long.

As for the ton of weight in the bottom of Matt's stomach, it wandered off hunting for its next depressed victim. Raven. Raven on the other hand watched the whole scene from a nearby tree. She broke into a huge grin when everything worked out. She stealthily climbed down and slept peacefully on her bed. She knew for a fact that both Matt and Mello would be in the Wammy House the next day. They would come into her room and say good bye and years from now they'd laugh about you.

And yes. Hugs are miracles. They can cure the hardest of the sicknesses. Mainly sadness. But that sadness will soon dissolve into happiness… if not today, tomorrow, if not tomorrow then the day after. But that sadness will get sick of you pretty soon and will leave you… someday.

A/n: Too cheezy? Well then get crackers. Hahaha! Get it? Cheese and crackers… no? Oh… Review! XD

silver