This is the start of a series of one-shots revolving around John Cooley, mostly in the months after Emily's death and before her return though a few will deal with after Matthew dies and his conflict in telling Emily about him. I hope you enjoy them
Out Living Them Both
I walked in the BAU and looked over at Emily's desk, the first thing I see is a blonde woman sitting there. I'm a little shocked at first but when I walk over to her I realize I know this woman, she worked with Emily on the case involving Matthew.
"Excuse me Ma'am I'm looking for Emily Prentiss." I say, the looks she gives me is as though she is shocked as to why I even ask that. "I'm her friend John Cooley." She continues staring at me. "A friend, the one who didn't die during the exorcism. No? Okay well its not like that hurts that she never mention me but where is Emmy Bear this morning?"
"Um, s-sir did you see Emily's picture on the wall when you came in?" The woman asked.
"Yeah, did she get some kind of award?" I ask raising my eyebrows.
"N-no sir it means she died in the line of duty." She answered, I feel like I've been punched in the gut.
"Sh-she's dead. Em-emily is dead?" I manage after a few moments.
"Yes sir she's been dead for almost six weeks." This infuriates me.
"Six weeks?! Its been six weeks and no one told me?!" I snap. "I am on her contact list you can lok, see?" I open the file I know is in her desk drawer and pull out the first page a list of people to contact in emergency. There are only three names, he parents and me. "No one told me."
"I-I'm sorry sir that's not on me that's up to our unit chief." She manages to get out. The man I met last time I was here, I think his name was Rossi, comes down to where we stand.
"You're John Cooley?" HE asks.
"Yes I am, and I have just learned that yet another person I love is dead." I snarl. "So why did I have to find out like this, why wasn't I notified I'm on her contact list." My voice wavers at the end, I now feel more like I've been stabbed in the gut and my heart carved out. "Th-This cannot be true."
"I'm sorry that it is, is there anything we can do?" He asks, it's my turn to look at him like he's insane.
"You know there was, six weeks ago, when she died, you could've called, you-you could've protected her but you didn't. You don't know Emily like I do, she was – she was the most wonderful person in the world. She was sweet and always there for everyone even when they didn't deserve it, she, she forgave me for a lot of things she shouldn't have forgiven me for." I manage turning on my heel and walking away.
Instead of going to Emily's grave I go to Matthew's because if I visit Emily's it will only make it real. I kneel in front of the head stone and wipe away a tear. "You know Matthew she's dead and if you're with her tell her that I love her, and that I miss her. I would go tell her myself but I-I can't do that right now." I sigh. "And you know I could always see you and her having kids one day if you'd managed to stay clean I could always see that but when you died, well then I saw something different I saw Emily with kids, I don't know who's they were but she always wanted to be a mother, she always wanted a family and now she'll never get that, and I will do everything I can to make sure she isn't forgotten by everyone and anyone who knew her." I whisper.
There's a tinkling of the wind chimes after a few moments of my silence and I smile to myself, shove my hands into my pockets and start to walk away, I pause before I leave the graveyard.
"You know Matthew I was never meant to out live you both…"