Disclaimer: I DO NOT own Rave Master! If I did it probably wouldn't have been canceled in the middle of everything… the only thing I own is this story. J
A/N: Hello all you Rave Master fans out there! I wrote this a while ago… but just barely got it typed so I thought I'd post it just to see how many would read this bad boy! Hehehe… well the WARNINGS for this fic don't really exist because it's pretty G- rated! Ummm… Haru and Musica Friendshippiness, only more if you want it, and if you use your imaginations! Oh yeah and it may contain SPOILERS! So Watch out!
2678 words
Thank you all… and now on with the story…
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Only A Memory
by: intense innocence
Pale moonlight shown down through the inky midnight sky, the air was clear and the stars twinkled brightly overhead in the misty twilight. A small breeze began to blow, upsetting shimmering silvery hair and pushing long wispy strands into soft lavender eyes.
"I can't believe you're really gone…" A small voice spoke out, like a whisper in the wind.
A young boy stood, looking over the moonlight's glowing lake, the water was as still as a crystallized painting. The scene was simply magical, but the air wasn't at all calm.
"Haru?" A deep voice called out to the younger boy; separating the eerie atmosphere.
Haru Glory stood his ground, keeping his glazed vision towards the lake in front of him. He swallowed heavily as he heard light footsteps on the ground behind him, approaching cautiously.
"Haru, dinner's almost ready." came the calm voice once again, and the current Rave Master felt a strong, yet gentle hand fall on his shoulder.
Haru let his eyes wander slightly noticing his friend's hand resting on his tense shoulder blade. Why was he here Now! He didn't want Musica to see him like this…! A sick feeling rose in his chest, killing the appetite he didn't have. Haru swallowed once again, his saliva thick and sluggish. "I'm not hungry." His reply came soft and airy, and the slight waver in his voice made the hidden tears visible.
"You NEED to eat." Musica's voice disagreed and he gently squeezed his stubborn friend's shoulder.
Silence followed long after that, until Haru stubbornly shook his head. He heard Musica's impatient sigh and the weight move off of his shoulder, but the comforting hand didn't vanish; instead it ran across his back soothingly.
"Are you gonna be okay, bud?" Musica asked, lifting his unoccupied limb and running his fingers through his own dark, gelled hair. He felt Haru give a soft shrug. Musica gave the boy a worried and heartfelt look. He took a step closer to him, letting their shoulders lightly brush together. "Everything will be just fine, Haru… you'll see." Musica cooed, his voice not holding a single ounce of negativity.
Haru let the positive words sink in, but they didn't help remove the doubt that still pained his heart.
"Do you wanna talk about it?" Musica asked gently, giving Haru a chance to get everything off his chest. He saw Haru's head give another soft shake. "You know I'm always here for you… whenever you're ready…" Musica replied and turned to leave.
Now Haru felt the warm hand leave him, all forms of comfort disappearing completely. He felt the hot tears come suddenly, he didn't want to be alone right now…he couldn't be alone right now!
"Musica." Haru choked out, making the older male stop dead in his tracks. Slowly, Musica turned back to meet him, but didn't find the young boy's stubborn back facing him, instead watery eyes were staring strait back into his own
Musica didn't give Haru time to speak as he instantly pulled the boy into a tight embrace. He felt Haru's head fall heavily on his chest along with the light tear drops that fell from teary amethyst eyes.
"He's gone…… He's… g-gone….." The words ripped apart Musica's heart, as the broken sentences fell from the young teen's trembling lips.
Musica stayed silent, not knowing what he could say to give any comfort to the boy-- not knowing at all how to help him. Haru's father was gone- died right before his eyes, protecting him- his one and only son. Hard forced sobs grew to reach the silver claimer's ears. "Shh…shhh…Haru-- buddy-- it's okay, it'll be alright… I know it hurts… I know… but he's in a better place now, right?" Musica cooed, speaking the only words of comfort that came into his mind.
"It---'as---m'--'ault---" Haru's muffled voice choked out, inaudible to Musica's listening ears.
"What, man what did you say?" Musica asked gently, angry at himself for not being able to comprehend the boy's feeble attempt at speaking. Musica shifted the boy on his shoulder, still not letting him go as he bent his neck lower so Haru could have his ear. "What did you say, buddy?" Musica asked back to him, whispering his question into Haru's own ear, desperately wanting to understand the short sentence that was previously uttered.
"it--it was my fault…" Haru repeated, his heated, broken breath passing over Musica's ear. This time though, Musica heard the words clearly, so clearly he wished that he hadn't heard them at all. His heart thudded painfully in his chest.
"How can you say that?" Musica replied, his own voice rattling dangerously.
Musica couldn't stop his own eyes from tearing up, and the salty droplets burned his vision badly. He felt Haru give a short gasp and his body shift, trying to pull away. Swiftly, Musica tightened his grip around the Rave Master, pulling him so close that they could feel each other's heartbeats.
Haru caved into Musica's relinquishing death-grip. "Haru, listen to me!-- This-- is NOT your fault!" Musica spoke forcefully, wanting desperately for Haru to understand; wanting him to never think that way again.
Haru answered with silence, he couldn't answer back to that, not when Musica spoke with such confidence.
"Haru-- you can't believe that this happened because of you…you did nothing wrong. Nothing. Do you understand me?" Musica asked, his voice coming gentler now, but still held an urgency that Haru had rarely heard coming from the young Black-Smith.
Haru let Musica's wise and powerful words sink in, allowing them to find a nesting place deep within his mind…maybe Musica was right…maybe… but… if it wasn't his fault then whose was it? Whose! Haru groped his mind for answers, searching for any alternative that may have been burned in his brain, but came up empty. There was no one else to blame! Haru gritted his teeth together fiercely. "No Musica… NO I don't understand!" Haru panted, shoving away from his friend with a force that nearly caused him to lose his balance.
Musica faltered slightly, surprise from Haru's sudden outburst washing over him. "Musica! It's ALL my fault! I did -n-nothing to help him! My dad prevented me from dying-- he risked his own LIFE! He didn't have to… I could-- co--could've done something! Anything! But… I didn't… Musica---I just…just Sat there…while m-my father was…Crushed. Right there in front of my eyes! I-I- could've pushed him away--- but no- I let him Die! I watched him DIE! I w-watched the whole … thing.. I…."
Haru cut off his bitter cries as something solid flew against his cheek, and in an instant he was on the ground in merciless agony. He could taste the familiar coppery tang of blood in his mouth. The flavor was rotten against his sensitive teeth. He felt his body jerk as he nearly gagged. Tears were stuck in his throat, choking him. Haru slowly glanced up at his friend's blurred figure; and could see Musica's balled fist retracting back to his side.
Musica's eyes immediately filled with guilt as he watched Haru's hand stubbornly begin to massage his assaulted face. "Are you going to stop blaming yourself now?" Musica asked, his voice was strong and compassionate.
Haru looked up at the silver claimer with empty violet eyes. "no…" His answer was harmless and whispery, and he couldn't silence the bitter cries that rose in his chest.
Musica looked at Haru with startled disbelief. "Haru--" Musica spat his friend's name with a hiss of warning furrowing in his edgy tone.
Haru let his eyes pierce through the air in front of him. "Why should I Musica…. Tell me--why I sh-should?.." Haru croaked stubbornly, the anger and resentment towards himself was rising in his chest, and his heart felt squished.
Musica watched carefully as the boy in front of him struggled to get up again, standing only feet away on unsteady legs. The look in the young boy's eyes was shaky and unfocused, and he didn't seem to be looking at anything.
Wind whistled through the air and a dangerous silence fell between the two. The only sound was Haru's ragged breathing. Musica stood completely still as he saw Haru pull back a shaking fist of his own, and he didn't make a movement to dodge it as the young Rave Master lunged at him. Weak fists connected to tanned flesh, and Musica took every blow. It didn't hurt, hardly… and Musica knew it was hurting Haru more anyways, by the way he let out small gasps each time a bruised knuckle came in contact with Musica's sturdy body.
Musica had to stop him, he couldn't let Haru do this to himself - soon he'd be too weak to even stand on his own. In a flash, Musica caught Haru's wrists in a firm death-grip. It didn't take long before Haru surrendered to him completely, knees buckling beneath his unsturdy weight and falling helplessly to the ground, his back tenderly kissing the dirt under him. Musica crouched above him on bended knees, straddling Haru's waist, still holding on tightly to his un-struggling hands.
Haru panted heavily trying to catch his breath as his felt himself being pinned to the rocky ground. He saw Musica staring down at him, his face covered in shadows, hiding any emotion. Haru's breath hitched in his throat, This position looked oddly familiar--too familiar… Almost like….
Tears welled in Haru's throat making it even harder to breathe, he felt a chill rise up his spine -- Haru fell completely silent, he felt completely frozen… flashbacks and images of Gale Glory came into his mind, each memory bringing a new pain that tore violently at his heart, ripping him apart from the inside out. It hurt, it hurt so much…
Flashback
'Gale looking down at him, protecting him from harm, telling him how they'd go back home together, false promises leaving Haru's father's lips… Everything seemed to be in slow motion, hordes of rock caving down around them, stone walls crashing and crumbling, just like the world around him.
"I'll always be here Haru, don't forget me,"
Words that Haru wished to never hear from his father, his own flesh and blood, his Dad….
"…You'll never be alone…"
Haru remembered staring right back into his father's eyes before IT happened. His eyes were so full of love, happiness, regret, guilt, relief, gladness, goodness, any and everything filled those soft light crimson pools, except pain… to him, there seemed to be no such feeling.
And Haru remembered feeling so safe and secure at that moment, actually believing his dad would never leave him…but also knowing that in the next instant he'd be gone--gone from him forever.
He remembered hearing his dad telling him something about the memory of the stars, but wasn't really listening-- the only thing that his ears were tuned into was the sharp clang of his father's and his own polished, priceless necklaces clashing together, the dull ring penetrating through his ears, blocking out all sound of falling debris and the world itself around them, and for a single moment Haru felt as if time had stopped.
A soft kiss landed on Haru's cheek and something cold and wet, fell onto his trembling lips, he didn't know if those tears were his own or not, and he didn't care, all he knew was he was crying hysterically and his father's heavy body was laying over him-- not moving-- completely still-- Lifeless…
As the ceiling continued to collapse around them, Haru felt more and more pressure weighing on his already aching chest, making it even harder to breathe……
…He tried to be strong after that for his dad-- tried to carry him out of the rubble to give him a proper burial, but… he was weak. Too Weak. There was too much blood-- he did the best he could… but he knew it wasn't enough.'
end flashback
Each of those scenes was like a mini movie plaguing Haru's thoughts. It all seemed so unreal, even now.
Haru blinked hard and he felt Musica give a soft sigh above him; Haru, knowing he must've zoned out for a while, glanced up shakily at the silver-claimer who was still staring down at him-- in the same position-- That same, agonizing stance. "This is how he died…" Haru choked out barely audible and he still wasn't able to swallow.
Musica froze, that's why Haru suddenly seemed so distant… Musica was unintentionally replaying out the scenes that his buddy wanted to see least right now. "I'm sorry…" Musica whispered back, not knowing how to respond, not knowing what to say, he had no idea-- but now he understood why Haru looked like he'd just seen a ghost.
"Haru - - - I'll get up now…" Musica stated softly, but was surprised when he felt a sharp tug on his wrists, he focused his gaze back down on Haru and saw the boy holding onto him with all the strength he had left to muster.
"He -- He was my shield Musica.." Haru uttered those few broken words and let his tears go, running silently, but free along his flushed face.
Musica lifted a skilled hand and with graceful fingertips laced across Haru's cheeks, capturing his falling tears. He could feel the other's pain -- it was rock solid…and he only knew one way to respond. Slowly he freed himself from Haru's weakening grip and placed his hands firmly on the dirt on either sides of Haru's head. Bowing slightly, he inched closer to Haru's face, feeling the boy's heated breath across his own. Finally close enough to see the emotion that spread clearly through the young Rave Master's eyes, Musica stopped, froze, and spoke in a tiny whisper, made only for one to hear.
"I will Always be your shield, Haru." Musica spoke and with a smile spread across his lips rose up again, watching as his friend forced himself to swallow the thick tears in his throat and letting a small, half-smile round across his own lips.
All was silent once again, the quiet wind rattling the leaves in the trees, the calm moonlit lake rippling against the wind's gentle breath. The two teens didn't utter a word, and Musica aided his young partner to help him stand.
For a moment, dark eyes locked with light, and they both turned towards the cabin, where sweet smells rested. Haru's stomach let out a low growl and Musica couldn't resist a smirk. Haru gave him a small nod and the two turned to go back into the house, walking with slow careful steps.
Wind pushed silvery strands into amethyst eyes once more and the Rave Master stood still, turning back for a simple second to look back at the wide moon -- and its silvery gleam -- and the millions of stars looking down on them from afar.
He couldn't see him… but Haru knew he wasn't gone…and was so much more than only a memory.
FIN
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A/N: Well there it is! Finished… I hope you enjoyed it! And I would totally appreciate any comments or disses or 'Constructive Critisism' that would be totally awesome! Well Read and Review PLEASE! Thank you all!
Have a Happy 2006! Luv Intense Innocence