i suck at summarees

Disclaimer: You are shocked to see a disclaimer here. What action do you take?
A. Go North B. Go Dennis C. Genuflect D. Stick it in

A/N: if u give me constructive critisim i will cut myself 2 sleep an report u 2 livejournal abuse

oh wait, i mean abuse

ch 1 : lust

"Unfortunately no one can be told what the matrix is, you have to see it for yourself" -Morpheus

"If you can't feed a hundred people, then feed just one." -Mother Teresa

"Oh look, it's Mr. Noodle's brother, Mr. Noodle." -Elmo

"His name is Robert Paulson. His name is Robert Paulson." -Project Mayhem Members

"Once there was an ugly barnacle, he was so ugly that everyone died. The End." -Patrick

"'Tis but a scratch." -The Black Knight

"I think he is as good as anyone" -Chuck Norris

"If two men are fighting and the wife of one of them comes to rescue her husband from his assailant, and she reaches out and seizes him by his private parts, you shall cut off her hand. Show her no pity."-Deuteronomy 25:11-12

"Nee noo nee noo noo nee nooooooo!" -Typewriter

A/M: OH, BTW, I ALMOST FORGOT

/song lyrics/

-character thinky waves-

::actions i was too lazy to write out::

/do u evar feel like breaking down/

Zax wuz braking wit me. NO, I MEAN SEFEROTH. HE WAS BRAKING UP WIT SEFFY-SAMA. he was steering wheeling him 2.

"I think it's time that we should break up." he said. (Zack did)

"That's what she said." poor Sephy-sama replied. (Translators Note: The 'sama' implies that Sephy is a very important person.)

"That is what who said?" Zackary asked Seph-Sephykins

"Your mom last night," poor Sephers exclaimed through tears.

/do u evar feel out uv plaise/

"THERE YOU GO AGAIN, FUCKING EVERYONE'S MOM." Zack exploded into anger, opening his mouth to speak again.

i, the author, feel the need to stop Zacky's sentence for a minute to describe Seph-Seph's hair. it's shiny, silver, and shit. ok. here we go.

"WASN'T YOUR MOM ENOUGH, SEPH?" Zack cried out, and then his voice got soft, "...Wasn't your mom enough?" he echoed (Zack did).

They then had braking up sex. i feel too lazy to describe it right now, but it was hot... and hard... and sticky. Sephirlena was whimpering for more and shit. He would have been uke, but he has a vagina, and all. Cum wuz everywhere lyke ice creem. Neyways...

/lyke somehow u just dont belong, ur cat don't understand you/

Seph started to cry again, "You have a big cock, I have a tight hole... I just don't see why we are breaking up, Zack"

Zack petted the long silver fur that grew from Sephy's scalp (called hair), "It's because I'm like a bird, Seph"

/do u evar wanna runaway, do u lock urself in ur room/

"I will only fly away."

/u masturb8 with the radio loud, so no1 hears u screaming/

"I don't know where my soul is."

/NO U DON' KNOE WUT ITS LYKE, WHEN NUTTIN FEELS AWLRIGHT, NO U DON' KNOE WUT IT LYKE 2B MEE/

"I don't know where my home is."

/i forget the lyrics::CUTTING AND MOANING NOISES::/

And then Sephiroth killed everyone, including the fanfic author.

Or really, he just killed Zack and all of the members of A Simple Plan.

He then proceeded to make a Linkin Park AMV about the relationship between himself, Zack, and the Masamune entitled 'In The End.' It was an acoustic version that he had played and sang himself while sniffling and injecting himself with heroine in between intervals.

...Little did he know that Naruto would be coming for Zack's revenge.