what a day
what a year
felt the stars
it's so so near
warren punched nathan really hard in the face as max and chloe ran away because honestly who cares about warren's wellbeing.
"stop punch" nathan commanded.
"no" warren said.
he looked into nathan's eyes and saw something beyond all the despair and confusion. he saw love.
warren got off of nathan. "oh my god im so sorry also i love you do you want to go ape with me?"
"yes..."
nathan and warren then broke into mr. jefferson's car and hotwired it, flooring to the drive in movie screening location and they made out as the famous monkey sex scene from planet of the apes came on. warren was a furry so monkey sex was his kink.
what the fuck is this story
anyway, warren and nathan kept watching the movie and stayed even after it finished and they started screening the movie toy story.
"woody gives me a woody" nathan said.
"that gives me a woody" max said.
then came a day when nathan and warren were walking through the woods in a path near a lighthouse and they started going at it ON THE LEAVES ON THE GROUND. then a storm started.
"oh shit we have to get out of here!" nathan yelled.
warren and nathan ran out of the woods without their pants on and emerged in an open area. they saw max and chloe sharing a kiss as both looked over at the boys.
"why the HELL are you two naked?" chloe screamed
"warren that doesn't look like 8 inches!" max yelled.
"i can explain max! it's only two inches because it's unerected i swear!" warren stammered. then suddenly a tree flew out of the tornado and killed warren.
the storm stopped. the evil was defeated. no more fuckboys in arcadia bay.
"is... is it over?" chloe asked confused.
nathan cried a little bit but seeing the death of his love also awakened his desires to help better himself. he pressed a button on the special magical buttplug warren had given him as a gift that he found off the ground and it teleported to another dimension into another fanfic i'll write someday and he apologized for being a douche to max and chloe then walked off pantsless into the forest to go back home.
max looked at chloe happily "so it wasn't because of time travel or you having to die. neato"