Disclaimer: :checks: No.
AN: I am rather proud that this is my last alphabet fic. I have now written at least one story with a title beginning with every letter of the alphabet. I didn't think 'Q' would be the last, but there you go.
The first thing she really noticed after she got over the new face, accent and constant "I've had too much sugar" personality he'd gotten this regeneration, was that he was more sympathetic. Although, that wasn't the right word, she was sure. More empathetic, maybe.
He said "I'm sorry" a lot more this time around. For pretty much ever reason under the suns and to everyone. Even when it was clearly not his fault. He seemed to desire to blame himself for the universe's problems, even when he had nothing to do with them.
She thought, maybe, it ultimately went back to the fact that he blamed himself that there were no Time Lords around to save the universe from itself and that there were so many problems he could solve if only there were more of his kind around. She knows her first Doctor felt like this, but he was terribly good at hiding it most of the time. This new one wasn't. He wore his hearts on his sleeve, or at least in his eyes. She could see the guilt crushing him and couldn't figure out what to do to help.
Every time she said "it's not your fault" he would look at her with guilty eyes, smile his thanks and promptly ignore what she'd just said. She kept saying it, though, for want of something to say.
She started to count a month (or near enough) in, but ended up losing track and gave up. It was too many times, that was for sure.
She did know one thing. He rarely, very rarely, said it to her. And she was grateful for that, because at least it meant that there was someone he didn't feel he had let down. It was a long time before she realized that that was the best thing she could and had done for him.
But he'd let her down in the end too, and the look in his eyes showed how guilty he felt for it. But he never told her he was sorry, and for the first time she wished he had.