Lesson learned: Rebellion
"…in short rebellion, not such a good idea"
B.T.W. before I start my story, my name is Sierra Addison. I'm a 5'3, brunette and presently a cheerleader, President of the math and science club, but take note I'm not a dork like you think of the people in math and science club, and I'm also the Secretary of the Student body.
Well, you know the time when you realize you did something which wasn't such a good idea. Well….that's kind of what happened. I was so caught up in becoming popular that I forgot the important things in life: doing what's right and I mean it by not partying all night and drinking; having respect for my parents, looking after my grades and looking for real friends.
Well all I'm saying is, in short rebellion, not such a good idea.
Well maybe you can't blame me; I didn't have many friends when I was in Elementary School. I was actually always being picked on for being honest and smart and also I didn't fix myself much because I was the shy type back then that's why they told me that I'm a dork, but, I never cried in front of them I just told them the phrase 'sticks and stones', I always wanted to show people that I was strong and them teasing me wasn't a bother at all, but, they never knew I was so hurt and sometimes at night, I would cry myself to sleep. I had always wished that I could be popular and smart, in short the dream girl of the school.
That's why when I reached high school and our family moved to another state I decided that I would start a new life, that I would start a new reputation of me as being the cool and popular but I left out the smart part, I got afraid of being teased as a nerd that's why I didn't study as hard as I did, I never failed because as my parents say 'I'm naturally smart' but it wasn't like when I was in elementary when I got so much achievements, I became an average minded, cool and popular kid like I always wanted, but at first I didn't care, I just thought that I wanna have fun and be happy in school for the first time.
Yah, at first I was enjoying it. Everyday parties and mall hangouts and I didn't care if my parents were getting angry and I always just told them to back off.
I did what all of them did. Drink, sometimes though I hated it but good thing I never became drunk and I almost tried smoking but I never did it, I actually hated the smell of it. I did all these things just to fit in with the people around me.
I didn't want to tell them why I was doing all these things because they never knew I was having such a bad time in my past school because I always told them that I was happy and that they shouldn't worry about me, I just didn't want that to happen to me again. I tried so hard to remain popular even if it affected my life.
I thought I was happy. I thought I was satisfied because of all these people around me who I thought "cared" about me.
Everyone wanted to be like me, and everyone thought I was cool and happy and they always told me that they wanted to be in my place, but thought 'No, No you wouldn't'.
When I get home I didn't want anyone to talk to me. I was just so desperate for silence, to remember that I'm still alive. I never knew that I would miss being alone like when I was in Elementary. Alone 'unhappy' because I'm 'unpopular' as they call me, but I was happy. I had REAL friends, people who actually care about me and not just because I was popular.
Now, I started to think what's gonna happen to me when people don't like me anymore, will they still care about me? I think not!
I proved it when I came to school with my eyes all red from crying because of a fight between me and my parents, I was expecting my "friends" to ask me about my problems and comfort me, but I was wrong they just told me to talk to them when I'm cool again because I'm ruining their so called good vibes. It seemed that everyone was too busy looking good, no one actually cared if their truly happy or not.
That's when I realized I was loosing myself, the real me, then I decided to find the real me. To be what I really am.
I stopped doing the things that I knew was wrong, the things that I know would ruin me completely, like drinking and staying at parties late and I actually stopped going to malls if there are tests the next day.
And it was better than I thought it would be.
It actually turns out, I still remained popular because the people around me was proud of my change and I actually became a role model, even if I didn't care anymore bout popularity but there it was, and now I'm with real friends who really care and only wish for me to be in a good place and now I have good grades and a happier life with my family, me and my parents don't argue much anymore because I remained true to myself, I decided not to care if they liked me or not, but you know people will actually like you better if you're true to yourself, and not just the popular people will like you, even the non popular ones who I can say are really true friends.
Right now I can say that my life is a lot cooler now.
Presently I'm in Senior high and I'm the top in our class, but I can say it was pretty hard learning to focus on your studies again after neglecting it for about a year and so but I did it and I'm actually proud of myself.
And well right now I'm single and not planning to have a relationship, maybe I'll have one when I go to college because presently I completely want to focus in studying and being a good daughter to my parents to pay up for the time that I spent messing around. I want to regain my parents trust then maybe that's when I'll get myself a boyfriend.
*wink*