AU

Emily Fitch – 15 years old – Bristol

It's our birthday today. I've always hated birthdays. We always end up having some massive party with all of Katie's cuntish friends and I'm left doing Playstation with James while Katie spends hours sneaking MDMA and behaving like a slag. Not that I care much; it's not like I would willingly spend more than 5 seconds in the company of Katie's friends. I just wish it mattered a little more what I want. I wish Katie wasn't such a bloody bitch!

This year is different though. James is over at Gordon McPhearson's so I'm stuck here sitting next to Katie, who of course is the center of attention, just trying to blend into the furniture. Happy Fucking Birthday to me!

"Ems…. Ems…. Ems!" I'm pulled from my thoughts to find Katie and Dicksplash, fucking Danny Guilermo, Katie's knob of a boyfriend, looking at me like I have 3 heads. I fight the urge to roll my eyes. I so don't care what they want. Katie probably wants to show off the "twin thing". As for Dicksplash, I wish he would just fuck off and die.

I let out a deep sigh "Yes?" I hiss.

"Geez, moody much?" Katie spits, "… Anyway, I just wanted to tell you we're going downstairs… Mum says it's cool for us to have some 'private time'" she air quotes with a grin, "… so come on! Me and you will grab the lounge chair, have some twin time, yeah?"

I was a bit confused by Katie's request (if you could even call it that) for twin time, but I'm not complaining. Besides, Danny is probably being a twat about something, she probably needs me to keep her from losing her shit. I shrug as I take her outstretched hand and she drags me into the basement to our game room. As soon as we sat down in the lounge chair Katie grabbed my arms and put them around her waist. Again, odd behavior, especially around her friends, but whatever, the half a bottle of Vodka I drank before the party was helping me to not care about much. That is why I drank it after all.

I was actually quite enjoying my time with Katie, strange as it was. She was still giving all of her attention to Dicksplash and her slags, but it was really nice just having her close to me on our birthday. I've really missed this.

I WAS enjoying my time with Katie… that is until I noticed Dicksplash shooting daggers at me from his place on the sofa. I realized then that Katie was looking a little tense, so I assumed he must have been doing so for quite some time. What the fuck is his problem?

Another hour passed before I learned exactly what the fuck his problem was.

I watched him lean over to a guy on his left, I didn't really care who he was… as long as I added "-O" to the end of his name, I'm sure he wouldn't give a shit what I called him.

"Too fuckin' right, man!" I heard Danny say, "I love a twin thing as much as the next guy but if Katie don't get her arse on my cock soon I'm fuckin' out!"

Oh Jesus! I didn't even bother covering my eye roll. It all made sense, now. Katie was being cuddly to try and turn on her boyfriend and now he was upset because I got to touch her and he didn't. This is bloody ridiculous!

Danny nodded to his mate and started shifting in his seat. He was getting up. A second later he was stood in front of us with a cheeky smile on his face.

"Hey Ems," he said, all the while smacking his lips on his chewing gum, "don't think you could bugger off for a bit, do ya? I been 'finkin 'bout me an' Katie havin' some 'private time', yeah?" he air quoted with a toothy grin, clearly enjoying the thought of what my mother would think, "One of the lads would be glad to keep you company." He waggled his eyebrows.

Katie jumped in before I had time to reply. "Could you fuck off, babes? We're having twin time!"

I knew fuck all about Danny, but I could tell by the look on his face that he was not happy. The second 'fuck off' had left Katie's lips, the vein in his forehead started to bulge. I looked from him to Katie, and back to him.

He shook his head, grin completely gone from his face. "Actually, girl, I don't fuckin' 'fink I can!" he spat, "This is bullshit, yeah? Bein' a fuckin' tease an' all that! You didn't even want her here in the first place! Said you was tired of her followin' you 'round, didn't ya? Besides, s'my hands that should be all over ya, yeah? Not hers! If she wasn't your fuckin' sister I'd 'fink she was after me pussy!"

My face was suddenly hot, a red hue slowly seeping into my vision. After his pussy!? She's my fucking sister! And I'm not even fucking gay! And this is my fucking house! And it's my fucking birthday! Who the fuck does he think he is!?

I looked over at Katie whose mouth was gaping. Clearly, she wasn't used to seeing Dicksplash behave quite so twattish. I looked back in Danny's direction, expecting him to have fucked off back to Knobville, but he was still there. He didn't look angry anymore, though. His face was contorted in a way that was hard to describe… Amused? Evil? Satisfied? A bit of all three, I suppose. He opened his mouth and the shit poured out.

"You're just a dirty fuckin' lezzer, aren't ya?" He looked me right in the eye.

My vision surged with red, nearly blinding. I blinked to focus. He leaned in closer to me and nodded.

"A fuckin' faggot, that's what you are! An' your own bloody sister can't even stand you neither." He spoke so smoothly, shaking his head, his voice was melodic as if he already knew what their outcome would be.

Before I knew it I was on my feet, having pushed Katie to the side. A final surge of red invaded my vision. My pulse pounded. My head swam. Every conscious thought I had had been ripped from my skull to be replaced with pure rage.

When my mind came back to me, it did so slowly. The first thing I noticed was that my throat felt like it was on fire and I had a massive headache. I focused my eyes and found a room full of people staring; some at me, some at the floor, all of them mouths agape. I followed the stare of those looking at the floor and found Danny's limp body lying there, a trickle of blood flowing down his face. On the floor surrounding him were the remnants of a lamp, the lamp from the side table next to the lounge chair. When my hearing kicked in I could hear footsteps coming down the stairs, my mum's voice along with them, sounding panicked.

I turned in time to see my mum reach the game room. She looked as if she had seen a ghost. She hurried over to Danny and looked him over. I watched silently, my memories slowly coming back to me of what happened when I blacked out, my eyes slowly widening in shock at my actions. Mum called Dad downstairs and asked him to get Danny to a hospital and I watched as Dad dragged him out of the room. Mum asked all the guests to leave and followed them upstairs, returning once they had all gone.

I was vaguely aware that Katie was stood next to and slightly behind me as Mum re-entered the room. She stared at the both of us for several minutes before speaking.

"Do either of you want to tell me what the bloody hell happened down here!?" She seethed, "I know now that letting the two of you have any privacy can only end in catastrophe!"

I stared at her dumbly. What was I supposed to say? Oh you know, I just went mental and nearly killed Katie's boyfriend… no biggie! Thankfully, Katie came to my rescue.

"He was being cruel to her, Mum!" she spoke in a tone that hinted pleading, "I was going to set him right but I didn't have to! Emsy fucking knocked his lights out! It was bloody brilliant, actually! He's been a twat all day, he fucking deserved it!"

My senses went dead again as my head started swimming with thoughts. Why had he acted that way, anyway? I mean Katie was the one pissing him off, why did he come after me? I just didn't understand… BOOM! Out of nowhere it hits me! Rachel! I hadn't known at the time that she was Danny's little sister, or I certainly wouldn't have been dumb enough to-… but I was drunk! And I was high on MDMA… it's not like I meant to… Great! So I snog some random girl at a party while I'm on bloody drugs and my whole life goes tits up! Dicksplash has to be a fucking dicksplash at our party all because I (not responsible for it!) snogged his sister! I had fucking enjoyed it though… she was so bloody sexy, and her lips were smooth and full… and her bum was so… God! I shook my head slowly, clearing the thoughts away. You're not fucking gay, Emily! I inwardly scolded. You're not Gay! You're not Gay! You're not… are you? My mind swam through the past few years: A few of Katie's less slaggy friends that I had been all to happy to be around and frequently tried to impress, a few girls from school that I constantly caught myself staring at… I fell to my knees, feeling the sob rip through my chest without my consent.

"Ems?" I barely hear Katie say as I clenched my fists against my knees. I somehow knew Mum had left. Through tears I could just make out Katie's form stepping closer to me, she knelt down a few feet away, her face shocked and concerned as she stared at me. I looked away, shielding my face with my hair. I couldn't let her see. I could never let any of them see. They would hate me if they found out. I always heard the things Mum said, always saw Katie nodding in agreement. Why did this have to happen to me? Why couldn't I have just been normal? My head pounded as more sobs ripped through my body. I could feel my heart hardening as I started my attempt to protect it from breaking. I could already feel the cracks starting to form. I cried until I had no tears left, feeling my body relax slightly at the end, knowing I was done for now. I sat steadying my breathing for a few minutes before Katie sat up slightly and walked on her knees until she was right in front of me. She tilted my head and looked me in the eyes, face still full of concern.

"Emsy? A-are you alright?" she stuttered out, carefully. Based on my behavior today, I couldn't blame her for being cautious. I shook my head and sniffled, barely holding back another wave of tears. We sat silently for another few moments. Katie seemed to be gathering her thoughts. She sighed.

"Ems are you…" she hesitated, "are you g-.." she let out a deep breath "are you gay?"

Tears flooded my eyes once again and I felt a large hole rip into my heart. I took a moment to try and compose myself before nodding. "Yeah… yeah, I think so, Kay." I croaked out.

I saw a single tear fall down Katie's cheek before she threw her arms around me.

"It's ok, Ems! It's ok!" she soothed as she rubbed my back, I clung to her. "I love you no matter what! I'll always love you!" both of our grips tightened. As we sat there crying together, I felt the weight on my heart lighten a little. She still loved me. My sister still loved me. "Thank you, Kay" I sobbed, "I love you so much!"