Author's note: Short prolouge to my new fic. The next chapters will be longer. This is just to start you off with. I don't know what I am planning on doing with this. The idea struck me as I was reading another fan-fic on this site. It's completely unrelated to it. That's just happened to be when I thought it up.

Disclaimer: Of course I don't own any of the characters.

No one ever believes they parents can die. It's just not something people think about. We knew death is inevitable. We know it happens. We've seen it first hand. But those were strangers. We didn't know them. None of us ever thought our father would die. He seemed invincible to us. Nothing could ever hurt us when he was around. He was our life; our hope. He took away our sorrows or misgivings in an instant when he held us. It's hard to believe he'll never be there anymore.

I think Mikey took it the hardest. He cried and sobbed all day and most of the night. It seemed he wanted the whole world to share in his grief. We could've used his light and his ability to crack jokes at odd times, but I don't believe he'll ever be like that again. I can still hear him crying softly at night. It really breaks my heart even more to see him like this.

Donny took it hard as well. He isn't as open about it as Mikey, but when I listen at the door to his lab, I can still hear his silent sobs. He tries to explain he's retreat to his lab as his usual tinkering, but I've come to know it's only to hide his tears. He hasn't touched any of his projects since…since it happened.

Raph and I, as the eldest, both hide our grief from our younger brothers. Of course, we do this for completely different reasons. Raph had never shown his true feelings in front of us for years. He always just hid behind his mask of anger and rage. It's been a long time since I've seen him cry. I can tell he's struggling as much as the rest of us, judging from the pounding the punching bag in the dojo has been getting lately...

How am I handling the death of my sensei and father? You wouldn't believe the grief I'm constantly in. No one would. Outside I may look fine, but inside I'm a broken mess. My father, the one in my wildest childhood dreams I thought would live forever, is gone. He's never coming back. He will never be there for me when I need his guidance: his wisdom. He's gone permanently and I can never hear him again, never see him, never feel his soft fur against me.

I wish I could've killed the one responsible, but my father's murderer managed to escape. He left us with a void never to be filled again. None of us will ever forget this crime against our broken family. Now, I would probably still be reasonably alright with this considering what happened, but it only gets worse. The Shredder did more then just take our father away. He also broke the bond my brothers and I held together. I never expected it to happen, but it did…

&&&&&&&

"Were are you going Raph?" Leo asks as he watches Raph head towards the entrance of the lair.

"I'm leaving, what does it look like?" Raph says, "I'm SICK of ya always tellin' me what ta do! I'm leavin' and I ain't plannin' on comin' back! Ya ain't my leader no more, ya hear me?"

"You can't leave, Raphael!" Leo says, "What about Mikey and Donny? They need you here! We need to stay together!"

"Ya don't need me, Fearless." Raph snaps.

"Raphie's leaving?" Mikey asks. Both brothers turn to him. "But what about always being together? What about our bond? Do you not care about us anymore, Raphie?"

"I can't handle staying here for another minute." Raph tells his youngest brother.

"But... Raphie?" Mikey says, "I... I don't want you to leave. I... I want... why can't you stay?"

"I'm sure you'll be fine without me." Raph says.

"If... If you're gonna leave us, can...can't I go...with you?" Mikey asks. He glances briefly at Leo to his agonized expression he couldn't hide in time.

"Whateva, little bro," Raph says as he turns to leave.

"What for me!" Mikey says before he runs off to his room, grabs a few things, and then, with one last look at his eldest brother, runs to catch up with Raph. Leo watches them go as his already broken heart breaks even more. His family had been literally torn apart. He turns as he feels a hand on his shoulder and sees Donny's tear-streaked face smiling sadly at him.

"Don't worry, Leo," Donny says, "I'm sure they'll be fine."

"They left us!" Leo says as he clenches his fist, "I should have seen this coming! Maybe I could've prevented it! They left us..." his last words leaving him on a moan as he falls weakly to his knees. Don follows him down, his arm now comfortingly wrapped around his hurting eldest brother.

"I'll never leave you, bro," Donny says. "I'll stay here with you always."

"Promise?"

"I promise."

Author's note: Tell what you think and I'll see about updating it!