Title: Dear Santa

Author: Karmyn

Rating: G or K

Summary: Dean finds a letter Mary wrote to Santa in 1979 and writes a letter of his own.

Spoilers: Mentions of an important plot point from "In the Beginning". Always includes character from "The Kids Are Alright" and a brief mention of an event from "Home". Nothing too major. I hope.

Characters: Mostly Dean with mentions of Mary and others, one OC. Plus Santa, of course.

Notes: Written for the UnGen Christmas Letters to Santa challenge at . This story also references plot points for stories not yet written, but hopefully will not be too confusing.

The box had been buried in the trunk of the car after Jenny had given it to him all those years ago back in Lawrence. After the accident, he and Sam had been too occupied with other things to worry about it. He should have known that Bobby would have put it away for them when he cleaned out the car after the accident. Even though that had only been about five years ago, to Dean it was another lifetime.

Dean had waited until everybody was asleep before he decided to go through the box. When he had first received it, he had looked through some of the photos, but the memories they stirred up were too much. Too many memories of what life was like before the Demon, before the fire, before his childhood was ripped away by the flames that killed his mother.

He was finally ready to face that past again. He had to face it because he knew one day his boys would ask questions and he wanted to be able to tell them about their family, about what it meant to be brave, to be strong, to be a Winchester. He had a wife, he had his children. There were still monsters out there, things that needed killing and people that needed saving, but most importantly, he had a family to protect.

He had looked through most of the photos when he first received the box. There were photos of Dad, some of Mom and Dad, impossibly happy and in love, one of him at four holding a newborn Sammy, his wide grin showing his happiness at his new role as big brother. There was the family portrait taken outside, the only photo of all four of them together. There were birth announcements for both him and Sam, a wedding announcement, the usual memorabilia couples collected over the years. As low key and under the radar as his and Bela's marriage had been, they had still collected cards and gifts from various friends. The same thing with Johnny's birth a few months before.

Near the bottom he found a newspaper clipping that he had hoped he would never see. The death of his grandparents at the hand of the Yellow Eyed Demon was something he had hoped to never be reminded of again, but here were the sanitized facts in cold newsprint. With a shudder he realized he was the only one alive that knew the truth about that horrible night.

His first instinct was to tear up the news article, to throw away the truth once again, but instead he just set it aside with the other items. No more lies about the past, Dean decided. Ben and Johnny deserved to know what their family had sacrificed in this fight.

The next item he picked up was a folded piece of paper labeled 'Christmas 1979'. That was his first Christmas when he would have been about 11 months old. Mom hadn't lived long enough to see Sammy's first Christmas.

Unfolding the paper, Dean was surprised to find it appeared to be a letter to Santa written by his mother.

"Dear Santa,

I know you're not real. But most people believe most monsters aren't real when I know they are.

It's my son's first Christmas and I want him to have a good life. I want him to grow up happy and healthy. I don't want him to grow up to be a hunter. Let others deal with the monsters in the dark. Let Dean grow up normal.

I wish my parents were here to see Dean, to watch him grow up. I want my mother so much on those nights when Dean won't sleep, when he's crying all night, when he's sick.

John is a great father and I never doubt that he loves me and Dean more than anything. I love him with all my heart, but he must never know what I did to save his life.

So for Christmas this year I want my son to always be happy. I want my husband always by my side. And I want the monsters to go away.

Mary Winchester"

Dean carefully folded the letter and put it back in the box. His memories of his mother were faded and jumbled, but he never doubted that she loved him. And it hurt that Sam had no memories of her at all. How he wished that his parents were still alive and getting to know their grandchildren.

He found a piece of paper and pen and wrote his own letter to Santa.

"Dear Santa,

I'm too old for this and don't even believe in you. Not sure if I ever did. Maybe somewhere you are real.

The thing is, I've finally gotten what I've always wanted. I have a family to take care of, to love. It's not just me and Sam in some crappy motel room this year.

It wasn't very easy with Bela, but so far we've made it work. I love her, she loves me. She still knows how to irritate me, but at least she stopped trying to get me and Sam killed all the time.

Sam is still alive. He hasn't turned evil. He's still an emo girl sometimes, but he's not evil. I know I can count on him to back me up in a tight spot.

Ben still misses his mother, which I understand. It's only been a few months since Lisa died. I still miss my mother and she's been dead over twenty five years. But he's adjusting. He's adjusting well. And he's smart. Takes after his Uncle Sammy like that. I loved that boy even when I didn't know he was mine. He's going to be a great hunter some day. He's not ready yet, but soon.

Johnny's just a baby, but Bela and I have been through so much already to keep him safe. I've fought to Hell and back for that boy. I don't know what I'd do without him.

So, Santa, all I want for Christmas this year is for my family to stay safe, my boys to always know I love them. I want to not have to train them as hunters, but I know I have to. So I want them to be the best hunters ever and I want them to be safe. And that maybe their children won't have to be hunters.

I want a little Peace on Earth for at least a little while. I want to watch my children grow up. I want to grow old with Bela. I want Sammy to have someone to love. Maybe if Sarah Blake is still single. She's be perfect for Sam.

I want to stop losing people I love. And I want my parents to know that I love them and I miss them.

Do you think you can do that, Santa?

Dean Winchester"

Dean folded up his own letter and added it to the box before deciding to call it a night. He checked on Ben and Johnny, making sure they were both okay before getting into bed beside his wife. And he was very happy.