Goodbye Forever

'Dear Woody,

You have to realize how much it hurt when you wouldn't believe me. I finally opened up my heart, and you shut me out.

I love you. I have for a long time. I will forever. But you know I have issues. I love you so much, that I was willing to fight them all away, just to be with you.

I had a pretty crappy life. But let me tell you, some of the least crappiest times in my life were like when you and I were in the middle of the Californian desert, kissing; Or staying late at the Progue, just to dance and talk; Working with you on cases; Simple hugs and encouraging words, shared between us. What I'm trying to say is, the best memories I have are shared with you. Woody, you are the best thing that's ever happened to me. But you are also one of the worst. You took away my happiness, two days ago in that hospital room. You took away my will to live.

Tell Lily that she rocks at what she does, and she should never give up. Tell Bug and Nigel that they are two of the coolest, smartest men I have ever met. Tell Garret that I idolize him and he should fight harder against people who try to take his job. Tell Matt Seely that I've never hated him as much as it seemed I did. Tell Renee Walcott that I love her attitude and she should keep fighting for justice. Tell them all that I love them and they are the best family I've ever had. I'll miss them a lot.

I'll miss you too, Woods.

But never forget how you hurt me.

Goodbye forever.

I love you.

-Jordan'

By the time Woody had got to the end of the letter, he was crying. It had been written by a shaky hand, and delivered to the front desk of the hospital for him. He knew there was nothing he could do. Not since Wayne Riggs had shot him and left him bed-ridden just a few days ago. Wow, it only was a few days ago. It seemed like a lifetime.

His door opened and Lily was there, crying.

"Woody – I can't believe it – it's Jordan, she's – she's –" A very upset Lily sobbed as she sat in the chair beside Woody's bed.

"What about Jordan?" he asked, knowing, yet fearing the answer.

"She killed herself. Oh my God, I can't believe she's dead. Jordan's gone – I just don't get it – why would she – I don't understand –" Lily rambled on about the bad news, still sobbing. She laid her head on the bed beside Woody. He rubbed her back as he cried himself.

Everyone would miss her, and maybe even think they had something to do with it.

But there was only one truth. Woody had killed Jordan.

He had been so scared of her lying to him, that he had scared her away. Scared her to death, you could say ironically.

Woody knew he could never love anybody else. But he didn't know if he could live without her.

His one true love had killed herself because of him.

A/N: Never wrote anything that angsty before. I wasn't going to post it, but then one of my friends said I could never be a real writer until I'd made my audience cry, so that's what I'm trying to do.

And if you're confused, it takes place a bit after the Season Four finale.

Please review.

Love Callieach