The Host Fan Fiction

This is my first fanfiction so please bear with me. I know the first chapter is short but that was because i ended up splitting the first chapter. I promise the rest of the chapters will be longer so give the story a chance.

Title – Confused

Chapter 1

Mel's POV

It's strange. I've already felt what it was like to relive the end when Wanda first awoke inside of me; but it was so much stranger now to relive my last moments with her and not feel her input, her thoughts mirroring mine.

Why? How could Wanda leave me like this? Did she not know how much I needed her, how much Jamie, Jeb, Jared and...Ian.

Oh Ian. I missed his bright blue eyes. The way he looked at me first thing in the morning, grinning at the way my hair looked after rolling around the cave floors all night. Wanda always was a restless sleeper. I always used to hate the way he looked at me, the way his eyes would bore into mine as if he could see into my soul. Oh how I longed for those eyes now; their intensity and their love.

Another pair of eyes flashed through my mind. These eyes were total opposites of the ones I had just been imagining. These eyes were sienna-coloured, surrounded by sun induced wrinkles that crinkled when he smiled at me. That smile used to draw me in every time. It could cause me to be at a loss for words but now it just made me think of how different Ian's sapphire blue eyes were.

No. This was Jared I was thinking about. My Jared. The love of my life, how could I just dismiss him so easily, what was wrong with me?

"Melanie"

Oh my goodness, that was Jared. The way he said my name made my heart ache. I had longed for months and months for this moment. The moment Jared and I would reunite without Wanda being in the way, witness to everything we did.

So why did I wish it were Ian whispering my name?

I slowly started to open my eyes. The first thing I noticed was Jared's calloused hand in mine and then the bright lights of Doc's room. Someone was perched on the end of my cot; I could feel their weight tugging on the covers as they leaned to see if I was truly waking up.

"Mel" said a high voice from the spot at the end of the bed. I knew that voice instantly and would know it anywhere it was Jamie and as my eyes opened fully I saw his smiling face looming over me, hair covering his eyes as he hopelessly tried to sweep it out of his face.

"I knew you would wake up" he exclaimed "Jared started to panic after the first hour or so but I knew you wouldn't leave us, I just knew it" he punched the air and I heard Doc chuckle.

Why did everyone seem so happy? I thought they had all started to warm up to Wanda. Jamie especially – I would even go as far as saying that he loved her just as much as me. So why was it he seemed so unaffected by Wanda's death.

I turned to face Doc. He looked at me with his big round eyes and shifted uncomfortably from one foot to the other. I gave him my darkest look of revulsion.

"How could you" I spat at him. "How could you kill her just like that?"

He stared at me as I went on and on.

"She was a person you know. She had feelings and emotions. Would you kill someone else in the caves so easily? What about if Jeb or Jamie or Sharon asked you to do what she had. Would you have easily have killed them" I was rambling I knew it but I just couldn't stop.

"She hardly even tried you know. She was hoping you would refuse. Tell her you wanted her to stay. I mean come on...what use would I be to you. I can't help you raid or get supplies. I'm useless – expendable...but Wanda...she wasn't. She was my sister" and with that I burst into tears and buried my face into Jared's shoulder.

I couldn't face the fact that I was facing a life in the caves without her. That I would never hear her gentle, innocent, thoughts again, always on hand to comfort me and help me when I needed it. No, I couldn't do this and I couldn't face these people who I feel like I don't even know anymore, these cold, heartless people who dismissed Wanda as if she had never even existed.

I pulled my head out of Jared's shoulder and got up to go. I didn't know where exactly but anywhere were I could mourn my sister respectfully. Even as I thought this I knew exactly where to go...the storage hole...Wanda's hole.

I turned towards the cave entrance and in my peripheral I saw something that pulled at my heartstrings

"Ian"

It wasn't just Ian either. In his arm he cradled a glowing cryotank that I instantly knew contained Wanda.

Ian turned as I called his name. His big, blue eyes looked at me with such sadness that they made me want to go over to him and just wrap my arms around him and never let go. He gripped the tank tighter at my gaze and I started to walk over to him when I felt to arms wrap around my waist.

"We'd never kill her Mel" Jared whispered in my ear. "Wanda is part of this family now and always will be. But you were not expendable and we needed you back to. Especially since we have a job to do that no one, but you could do."

I turned away from Ian to look at the man that used to hold me to this earth and saw the truth in his words. He believed everything he had just said and so I had trust him.

"And what might that be" I asked with hesitation

"We need to find Wanda a body" he replied "And who better than you who I believe knows Wanda better than anybody here could ever wish too"

I looked from Jared with his sun-bleached hair and tan skin to Jamie who was looking at me expectantly with a smile that reached his eyes and finally Ian who looked at me longingly with his intense gaze that made me go weak at the knees. If only that look was meant for me and not just for the memories that this body held for him.

I turned back to Jared. No matter what, Wanda was what mattered right now and id be damned before I let anyone else find the right person for her. He looked at me expectantly and I smiled up at him. No matter what I would always love Jared.

"What are we waiting for then" I sighed. "Let's get to it. I'm sure Wanda would like to get back to working as soon as. You know she'll only kill us for letting her have a few days off"

And with that I leant up to kiss Jared full on the lips, to feel the fireworks I always got when I kissed him and pushed away my thoughts of Ian's mouth on mine and his arms around my waist.

okay so that was the first chapter. Its just the beginning got lots of exciting ideas to come. I have this story all planned out in my head and there are some big suprising twists to come. Please review and let me know what you think good or bad i can take it. Next chapter comming soon