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The prodigious Traditions of Christmas
Hi, I'm Tai and I am here to help you understand Christmas and holiday cheer. CAUTION: THIS THE ACTUALL TRUTH ABOUT CHRISTMAS.
While many 01 digidestined are familiar with Christmas and its traditions, there are many people throughout the world who are not. In the spirit of Christmas and in the interest of global harmony and coziness we offer, via the World Wide Web, this treatise on what a prodigious foreign visitor today to the digiworld might expect to see during the Christmas holiday period.
You may have seen pictures of an old fat man in the red felt suit with black boots and a long white beard. He is the crazy character known as Santa Claus. Though it doesn't make any sense, parents deliberately deceive their children into believing that this idiot flies through the air in a sleigh pulled by a team of deer. Young children are further told that in the space of a few hours on the night before Christmas day he visits every house, apartment, and the computer room in the world and leaves wrapped gifts under an evergreen tree that most of the tradition followers place inside their homes! Nobody knows why, and nobody seems to mind.
Old people will put out dishes of hard nasty Christmas candy that's all stuck together and has been passed down through the years for generations. No, it's not a practical joke on the level of the walking teeth, so don't be offended. Just be nice, don't say anything, and try to ignore it. Whatever you do, DON'T EAT IT! You may contract poison.
A small piece of a plant with white berries called "mistletoe" is sometimes mounted over doorways or other places where people are likely to stand. Any person doing so may be kissed by anyone wishing to do so and must hold the fucker blameless of all sexual harassment charges.
Each year the newsmedia finds the most popular toy, and then repeatedly broadcasts its supposed scarcity to the public who, upon hearing the "news", must attempt to find and purchase the Cool Toy or die.
Office employees of Japan are invited to the Office Christmas Party and are encouraged to become inebriated. Any employee doing so may be kissed by other employees who are then held blameless of all sexual harassment charges.
Each Christmas, gifts of all kinds are purchased for family, friends and even Davis with credit cards until all the credit limits are reached. But while women, children, and even Davis are allowed almost anything as a gift, men are restricted to one of two choices for a Christmas present: (1) An ugly tie, (2) a wallet. In the event that neither of these items can be conveniently found, a bottle of Hai Karate aftershave or bottle of wine may also be considered, but only if they can be found in a bargain bin.
I hope this has been instructive.
The prodigious Traditions of Christmas
Hi, I'm Tai and I am here to help you understand Christmas and holiday cheer. CAUTION: THIS THE ACTUALL TRUTH ABOUT CHRISTMAS.
While many 01 digidestined are familiar with Christmas and its traditions, there are many people throughout the world who are not. In the spirit of Christmas and in the interest of global harmony and coziness we offer, via the World Wide Web, this treatise on what a prodigious foreign visitor today to the digiworld might expect to see during the Christmas holiday period.
You may have seen pictures of an old fat man in the red felt suit with black boots and a long white beard. He is the crazy character known as Santa Claus. Though it doesn't make any sense, parents deliberately deceive their children into believing that this idiot flies through the air in a sleigh pulled by a team of deer. Young children are further told that in the space of a few hours on the night before Christmas day he visits every house, apartment, and the computer room in the world and leaves wrapped gifts under an evergreen tree that most of the tradition followers place inside their homes! Nobody knows why, and nobody seems to mind.
Old people will put out dishes of hard nasty Christmas candy that's all stuck together and has been passed down through the years for generations. No, it's not a practical joke on the level of the walking teeth, so don't be offended. Just be nice, don't say anything, and try to ignore it. Whatever you do, DON'T EAT IT! You may contract poison.
A small piece of a plant with white berries called "mistletoe" is sometimes mounted over doorways or other places where people are likely to stand. Any person doing so may be kissed by anyone wishing to do so and must hold the fucker blameless of all sexual harassment charges.
Each year the newsmedia finds the most popular toy, and then repeatedly broadcasts its supposed scarcity to the public who, upon hearing the "news", must attempt to find and purchase the Cool Toy or die.
Office employees of Japan are invited to the Office Christmas Party and are encouraged to become inebriated. Any employee doing so may be kissed by other employees who are then held blameless of all sexual harassment charges.
Each Christmas, gifts of all kinds are purchased for family, friends and even Davis with credit cards until all the credit limits are reached. But while women, children, and even Davis are allowed almost anything as a gift, men are restricted to one of two choices for a Christmas present: (1) An ugly tie, (2) a wallet. In the event that neither of these items can be conveniently found, a bottle of Hai Karate aftershave or bottle of wine may also be considered, but only if they can be found in a bargain bin.
I hope this has been instructive.