Kurt sat alone reveling in memories. When he should have been heading to glee club to practice, but he felt he needed the time to think.

I know it's stupid but sometimes I'll sneak in there open all the drawers and close my eyes…

That's not stupid!

He suddenly felt warm, thinking of the memory he shared with Finn Hudson. The boy he loved. Yes, Kurt needed time to think about Finn. It was stupid he knew it wasn't going to happen. Every day he wondered why Finn, why him?

Finn was on the football team. Yeah Kurt's team now to since he had joined but his true team would always be Glee. Really those idiotic jocks had pulled pranks on him ever since he could remember which was to say his whole life.

Now get out of here … and take some time to think wither or not any of your friends on the football team would have done that for you.

He had been so hurt seeing Finn like that, scared.

If I don't do it, the guys on the team are gonna kick the crap out of me.

Now we can't have that can we.

That was definitely one of their more hurtful pranks they had ever pulled. To see Finn so confused and pained. Plus well slushy in the face not always pleasurable smelling like grape and will being embarrassed in front of the whole school. Not the highlight of anyone's day.

It's called taking one for the team.

Kurt closed his eyes. He, Mercedes, and heck even Rachel knew that he and Finn weren't probably ever going to happen.

You think I'm living in a fairytale if I were second or if I were fiftieth; I'd still be ahead of you because I'm a girl.

It had hurt hearing the truth; having the fantasy he constructed each day shatter. The dream he frequently visited, especially when Finn looked in his direction, break. He liked to pretend that that look was for him not Rachel or Quinn, His all his. But she was right it wasn't his.

It had been dumb thinking a bad makeover would ruin Rachel's chances with Finn. Now she was back with a vengeance, she wouldn't give up.

I'll admit it I'm madly in love with Finn.

Why?

"Hey, Kurt you're going to be late for practice man." Speak of the devil. "You all right?" He asked noticing the tears Kurt had ignored.

He's my knight in shining armor.

"Yeah I'm fine, you?" Kurt asked getting of the bench and wiping the tears from his face.

"Usual, Quinn and baby drama…" He replied heading to glee practice Kurt following. "You know if you ever need anything I can help. You've always helped me.

My knight…

Kurt turned to stare at the jock shocked by his kind gesture. The idea then crossed his mind it would be so much easier to tell him now. Get rejected, die, maybe move on but Finn had enough drama without having him to worry about.

Girls they're your problem.

Didn't he know it; if it wasn't for Quinn having a bun in the oven he might have a remote chance at Finn.

I'd still be ahead of you because I'm a girl.

If Rachel wasn't there his chance may be even a little higher. Not very high but still he'd have a better chance than what he had now. Kurt still didn't get what Finn saw in her though.

Rachel manages to dress like a grandmother and a toddler at the same time.

"Kurt you sure you don't want to talk. Did someone hurt you?" Finn asked concerned pulling Kurt back to the present. He shook his head and looked up into Finn's eyes.

"No it's just…

I'm not that girl.

"I don't feel… I can't."

Were nothing but distractions.

"Finn…"

I honestly love you!

He couldn't say it and suddenly he just wanted away from Finn. So he simply opened the door leaving the boy he loved in the hall.

I'm not that girl.