Awkward Confessions

by Yemoya

Fire Lord Zuko just returns from a dinner with his former personal assistant Kilara, who became his best friend while working for him. Kilara will leave the capital the next day, so Zuko only has one evening left to tell her what he really feels for her. What if he has not the courage and she doesn't feel the same? But Zuko has faught Ozai and Azula and he doesn't ever give up.

Author's note: This is going to be a chapter sometime in my current story Love of Fire and Water. I'm always thinking pretty much ahead, so while brushing my teeth the other day, the following situation was playing in my head and I was thinking that I had to write this down in an instant, so three hours later I was finished, but didn't know if I was going to publish this just like that. But I've seen that other fanfiction writers publish chapters which are set in the future of their current stories, so I thought "Why not?"

So for anyone who does not want to be spoilered (Is this the right way to say that? – cause Word underlines it in red) for Love of Fire and Water, better do not read this.

This one shot is about what Fire Lord Zuko and a waterbender named Kilara do after a nice, but a little bit upsetting dinner in a restaurant. This is about insecurities, gathering one's courage, honesty, trust and friendship. It's definitely going to be about feelings, so if you're not up to this, then you shall leave here this instant!

But everyone else is warmly welcome to read the following text.

Oh, yeah, almost forgot it: please review! Thanks!

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Awkward Confessions

Kilara

Zuko again held his arm to me to help me out of the carriage. I smiled to myself, because he really was a gentleman. He would make a woman very happy someday.

But that woman wouldn't be me.

I tried to push these thoughts away for the thousandth time today, as I laid my hand on his arm and descended from the carriage.

Zuko smiled at me and my heart fluttered in my chest.

After I had decided to leave, my feelings for him were running amok. Normally I could keep them at stake, but not now. Not when I knew that I would leave tomorrow. Not when I still remembered his sad and hurt eyes as I had told him. Of course I had reassured him that it didn't have anything to do with him. Even though I loved him it was still my own problem. He didn't have anything to do with that.

He laid his hand on mine and turned to walk to the gates of the palace and I hurried to match his long strides. I was not used to walk with my hand on his arm and therefore his body close to mine. Even though the night already was warm I could feel his body heat pretty well.

I swallowed as I thought that I might never feel this again. That I might never see him, touch him, hear him, smell him again in my whole life. I just wanted to cry out loud when the reality of my decision struck me once more.

No, I had to do this. I had to go. Staying would hurt me even more. Watching him being with another woman would hurt me even more. And I knew that I could never let him go while staying by his side. I had stayed by his side now for almost four years and I had loved him for almost three of it. Now it was really time for me to move on. And I could only let him go, if I was not with him.

My dark thoughts caused me to slow my pace a bit and I stumbled when Zuko was still marching ahead. But he stopped, turned around and grabbed my other arm to stabilise me. A frown appeared on his face.

"Are you alright?" he asked worriedly, searching my face for any sign of discomfort.

I smiled at him reassuringly. "I'm fine, really." I was a better liar than him, but when I was feeling stressed he could always tell that I was lying.

So he narrowed his eyes at me. "You're not still upset with that waitress, are you?"

I pressed my lips tightly together, looking to the side. Well, that hadn't caused me stumbling, but I was still upset because of that.

At the beginning of my job it had been acceptable to me that people would look down on me or wondering if I was really the right one for it. But I had proved them wrong. I was not only the Fire Lord's personal assistant, I had saved his life a couple of times, I gave him advice and I always planned for the best and prepared for the worst. Zuko's advisors had finally come to respect me, as did the whole palace staff, so no one had had a real problem when Zuko had announced to make me an official advisor, but the common people still didn't know. They thought I was some Water Tribe bitch who didn't know the Fire Nation or its people and therefore didn't have the right to be the Fire Lord's personal assistant. I often heard remarks about myself on the streets, when I was out on my own and people didn't know that I was there, but this waitress had stood right in front of me!

Making jokes about the Fire Lord's assistant was not a smart thing to do. Especially not when the Fire Lord was sitting right next to one.

Well, the waitress had assumed that I was Zuko's concubine and had said mockingly that I should be careful, because he obviously liked dark skin and blue eyes and his assistant was a Water Tribe woman who he had to spend a lot of time with. First, I had become upset by the mere accusation of being a concubine and then I had been upset over the fact that Zuko was not the least bit interested in me that way.

I sighed. No, the waitress's questions were not what was bothering me. "No, I'm not even thinking about this anymore."

Zuko gave me a firm nod. "Good."

We continued to walk through the great hallways with windows as high that they reached the ceilings and guards standing at nearly every door or entrance. Even after five years of living here I was still amazed at the majestic architecture.

With the lift we accessed the ninth floor, where my apartment was.

I felt sad at the prospect of sleeping in my room alone tonight, but it probably was for the best. If I slept in Zuko's bed again more rumours would spread and it would be even harder for me to leave tomorrow.

Sometimes, when we had been talking or working until late Zuko had let me sleep with him in his bed, which was big enough for ten people, so we hadn't even touched while sleeping. But it still had felt nice and warm. I preferred any way of being near him to being alone.

I clenched my jaw, knowing that after tomorrow I would be alone, far from him for a long time. Maybe forever.

Zuko

My stomach clenched tightly because of my nervousness. I felt sweat on my forehead and weakness in my knees. Dragons, I hadn't felt that nervous since the day I became Fire Lord.

I still hadn't been sure of my worth and anticipated someone to attempt to kill me, before I could be crowned, but this was maybe even worse.

Kira would leave tomorrow. I still had no idea why she needed to go, only that she had seemed desperate and the whole situation rather urgent. I had only agreed to her resignation because of her desperation and because she had agreed to go out to have dinner with me.

I had never said the word "date", but it had felt like one. Anyhow, I had tried my best to make it recognisable as a date. I had brought her flowers, had made her compliments and had laid my hand on her back or shoulder many times. But one thing was still missing, something that I hadn't done to her since our first Ba Sing Se, when I had still been a fugitive and Kira the daughter of a professor. Now she hadn't just graduated as the best student of her year, but she had been my personal assistant (after being that idiot minister Kang's assistant) and my advisor. Well, and I was Fire Lord. But that hadn't changed anything about dealing with the other sex. Girls had become women, but they were still confusing and a complete mystery to me. Having had one long relationship and a few dates didn't make me an expert at all. Especially since the dates had only wanted me for my wealth and crown.

Nevertheless, I needed to tell Kira how I felt. She would leave tomorrow and I had been carrying my feelings for her for far too long. This could be my last chance to let her know about how I felt for her. I was not going to let her leave without knowing how much she meant to me. I was not going to be a coward. Again.

I had tried to tell Kira for longer than a year about how I felt. But instead of telling her I had promoted her to Advisor. Not that she didn't deserve it. She totally did, since I had already listened more to her advice anyway than to that of my Advisors in the last years. And her advice had proved almost every time to be the right one.

I tried to push my fears of rejection down, as we neared her room and prepared for what I had to do now. Sooner than I had wanted we were standing in front of her door. She let go of my arm and turned to look at me.

I swallowed and braced up. Come on, Zuko, you can do that. You faced your father, fought Azula, redirected lightning, managed to actually bend lightning and reined your country for almost eight years! What is a declaration of love against that?

Two guards had accompanied us and there were two standing in front of her door. I frowned, but didn't want to dismiss them. So I straightened myself and cleared my throat.

"Kilara, there is something important we have to talk about," I said indifferently.

She raised her eyebrows in surprise, but told the guards to open her door.

I walked in after her and admired her light auburn hair that was partly loose as usual, since the upper half was pulled up into a topknot. She wore one of her turquoise robes, the colour which I liked the most on her skin, since it matched so well with her eyes. Kira was not only from the Water Tribe or the Earth Kingdom, she was both. And now after living in the Fire Nation for more than seven years she was from the Fire Nation, too.

The guards closed the door behind me and I followed Kira to the table, chairs and sofas in the middle of her living room.

I took off my casual day armor, since I wanted to be comfortable when telling Kira that I loved her.

She watched me curiously and sat down on the sofa.

"Do you wish for me to order some tea, Zuko?" she asked.

Tea might calm me now, but I didn't want to postpone this anymore. I shook my head. "No, there is no need for that." Instead of sitting across from her like I had done any other time being here, I sat down next to her with a small space between us.

"When you leave tomorrow, when will I see you again?" I asked.

Her eyes became sad which gladdened me, because it meant that she didn't want to leave.

"I don't know," she said lowly and I thought I hadn't heard her.

"You don't know?" I repeated.

Sighing, Kira pressed her palms to her forehead. "No, Zuko, I don't know. I could be a year, maybe longer."

"A year?!" What? How in the dragons' names should I survive a year without her?

She bit down on her lip. "Yes. It might take that long."

"But…" I need you, I wanted to say. "Oh. But you will write, won't you?"

Kira flinched and looked at me cautiously, pain obvious in her eyes, but she nodded. "Yes, I… couldn't stop myself from doing so, even if I wanted to. You are important to me, you know that. I will always let you know what is going on in my life, as I would want to know what is going on in yours."

I tried to smile to reassure her that I was not angry or upset (which I was) that I might not see her for more than a year.

What if something would happen to her? What if I would never see her again?

I had to tell her!

"Yeah… about that… There actually is something that is going on in my life which you don't know about," I said tentatively.

A deep frown covered her face. "Oh, really? What is it?"

I locked my gaze with hers, drowning in a turquoise sea, taking all her beautiful features in, the oval shaped face with the high cheekbones, the plump lower lip and the defined upper one. The few freckles, which covered her straight nose, and her dark eyebrows, as well as her slightly high forehead.

I licked my lips, since they were dry from my nervousness.

Now or never, Zuko. You never give up without a fight. Now you have to fight.

"I…" There weren't any words coming into my mind that made sense, only fragments of sentences, but I couldn't just say that I loved her. I probably should have practised that with a squirrelfrog before. I've never been good with words and I was growing more and more frustrated with each second passing without me saying anything.

I looked at her lips and I suddenly knew that I didn't have to say anything. I shifted closer on the sofa, quickly laid a hand on her neck, bent down and pressed my lips to hers.

They were soft, even more so than I remembered as I moved closer and wrapped my other arm around her waist.

Oh dragons, I couldn't believe that I was finally kissing her. I had her close in my arms and my heart beat so fast as if it wanted to jump out of my chest. She felt so damn good and I wanted her closer and more naked. My blood was boiling and my lower body noticed that, too.

When I moved my lips Kira responded and laid her hands on my chest. I couldn't stop the groan from escaping my lips as I felt her touch. Feeling encouraged I ran my tongue along her lower lip, wanting to enter her mouth, but then she suddenly pushed me away.

I had probably been a bit hasty in thinking that she had liked me kissing her.

Kilara

Oh dear spirits of the moon and the ocean, holy badgermoleys and by the dragons!

Zuko had just kissed me!

Why…

What…

I couldn't think about one logical thing, not even my questions seemed to find an end in my mind.

My hands were still on his chest, while we were staring at each other, so I quickly pulled them away.

He swallowed and drew back a bit, his jaw clenching. But before he could look away I saw the hurt in his eyes.

"Why?" I breathed.

Zuko took a deep breath and put his hands on his knees.

"Why did you do that?"

"The same reason anyone kisses someone," he answered in a hoarse voice.

I felt my whole body tense and became angry in an instant. How dare he do something like that to me? We were friends, which meant that we meant something to each other! "Are you crazy? What in the four nations made you think that I wanted you to do that?!" I growled at him.

I saw his back tense and his fists curl, but I was not done. "We are friends and if you want someone to bed, go to a brothel or flirt with a noblewoman, but don't try that on me! I'll leave tomorrow and you think the best way to part is having sex?! I thought…"

"I didn't kiss you because of sex!" Zuko suddenly snarled at me, turning his head, his eyes blazing with anger.

My own rage even mounted, because he had just interrupted me. But I only laughed a cold laugh. "Oh, really? And what other reason did you have if it's 'the same reason anyone kisses someone'?"

He stared at me as if I had gone completely insane, both his eyes more widened than usual and his mouth slightly open. "People don't only kiss for sex. Everyone I know kisses for more," he added quietly.

Suddenly all of my anger vanished and instead I felt a small piece of hope lighten up in my heart. "What?" I whispered.

His expression softened immediately. "I would never kiss you because of sex. I would not dishonour you in that way, because you are too important to me. That's why I kissed you. Because you are important."

My eyes widened and I swallowed, since my mouth felt suddenly very dry. I stared at him, waiting for further explanations.

"Like emotionally in… uh… a romantic way?" His voice even sounded suggestive and I almost smiled at the sight of a stammering Zuko. He hadn't done that for a long time now.

"You… you mean…," I began, but was interrupted again.

"I've got feelings for you," Zuko blurted out, looking away. "And I guess I just wanted you to know, since we won't see each other again for a long time."

"You say you've got…" I didn't manage to say it out loud.

"Yes," he confirmed.

I was sure that I was dreaming. Any moment now I would wake up and find out that this wasn't really happening. No. Zuko wouldn't say it, he wouldn't even feel it and he wouldn't kiss me either (well, he once did, but he wouldn't do that now).

I pressed my eyes shut and screamed in my head 'Wake up!'.

If this dream would continue and I'd wake up to find myself in the cruel reality it would clearly destroy me.

But nothing more happened than Zuko clearing his throat. "Anyway, I just wanted you to know. Uh, good night. See you tomorrow," he said and got up, putting his armor back on and heading for the door.

I couldn't move. I so damn needed to move, but my body was like ice. I was too amazed and stunned by him admitting having feelings for me. I felt like being in a different world and still couldn't get it into my head what had just happened.

The man I had loved for almost three years had just told me that he had feelings for me. I had dreamed of that moment, I had longed and wished for him saying these words for years now. It felt like lightning struck me as I noticed my stupid behaviour.

Oh moon, he was about to get out of my apartment!

"Wait!" I shouted, jumping up and dashing towards the door.

When he turned around to face me I managed to stop and cleared my throat.

Zuko's pale golden eyes looked sad and hurting while his jaw was clenched. "What?" he pressed out between his teeth.

Oh, now he was angry.

I frowned at him, since I didn't like it when he was speaking to me like that. "I… uh… you know, when you just…" I sighed and took a deep breath to brace myself. "I'm sorry for how I just behaved. Or the way I was thinking of you. I know you wouldn't do this to me, but I would have never ever thought that you could like me that way. It doesn't make any sense to me, so I've just been surprised and…" I had to look away and couldn't hold his gaze any longer. "It doesn't make any sense, Zuko. I'm not from the Fire Nation, I'm not even a noble. I was your assistant and am your advisor. How could you… even feel something for me?" My voice had become lower and lower, until I almost whispered. My own doubts, fears and also reassurances had surfaced now. Moon, I couldn't believe I had just asked him that.

"Kira…," Zuko said softly and I lifted my gaze to look at him. His lips were slightly parted and although there was a deep frown on his face his eyes were gentle. "Why do you think I would care about from which nation you are or from which stand? You are you and the why or how doesn't matter to me."

I felt my face soften and a smile pulling on my lips which disappeared an instant later, since I couldn't stand his wary yet hopeful gaze. I didn't want to hurt him in any way and I loved him, so I should be happy about him returning my feelings.

Moving up on my toes I grabbed his collar and pulled his face down to me, his lips again on mine.

I felt him struggling a bit, but I didn't let him go. I moved my lips against his and pressed my body to his. After a few seconds I heard him making a sound that sounded like a sob, but changed into a soft groan, as he wrapped his arms around my waist and pushed down on my lips.

My whole body heated up, lots of heat focusing in my centre and making my mind go dizzy.

Zuko dived his tongue into my mouth, which he had wanted to do before, but this time I let him. I opened my mouth to his, welcoming his tongue in a needy manner as I ran my hands over his chest, shoulders and neck. Moon, I had wanted to do that for so long!

And it felt even better than I had thought.

But suddenly Zuko pulled away, breathing heavily, but our faces still only centimetres away from each other.

"Why do you do this?" he asked, his eyes searching for something in my face. He asked me the same question which I had asked him earlier.

Well, wasn't it obvious? How could I not have feelings for him?

I felt my cheeks flush, but I didn't look away and kept his gaze. A smile appeared on my face as I finally noticed what was really going on. "I have got the same reason you do," I said softly and laid a hand on his scarred cheek.

His eyes widened in surprise and maybe even happiness. "Really?"

My smile widened and I nodded. "Yes, really."

Zuko's mouth crashed against mine again, his tongue demanding immediate entrance and his hands were roaming on my hips and waist, causing me to moan slightly.

I was immediately aroused and only wanted to have us both naked in my bed. I wanted to wrap around him and never let him go again.

His lips left mine to kiss my cheeks, jaw and throat. I waved a hand through his partly loose hair to keep him where he was. But suddenly I felt something cold and hard pressing into my shoulder.

"Can you…" I tried to speak. Moon, was that difficult! "Can you remove your armor?"

He stiffened and let go of me.

Well, why had I to ask?

He licked his lower lip while staring into my eyes and I felt my stomach flutter at that sight. My lips immediately parted, ready for more kisses, but only the corner of his mouth lifted a bit. "If you remove your robe, I'll remove my armor."

I blinked at him, then my hands darted to my belt, untying it. Zuko's eyes seemed to light up, as if there was a fire burning behind his irises and I bit my lip, feeling completely overwhelmed by my desire.

He didn't only remove the shoulder and chest plates, which he had done earlier, but also the surcoat. We both were still fully dressed, there was only one layer of clothing gone.

Zuko wanted to kiss me again, but I grabbed his hand and pulled him after me into my bedroom. When I sat down on my bed I could see that his cheeks were a bit red from shyness despite his hungry gaze.

Moon, I had dreamed of him looking at me like that and it was really warming my heart that he didn't keep his cool mask, but that he allowed me to see his emotions in his face. Well, he always did, but I had never seen this passionate fire burning in his eyes looking at me.

Before he bent down, he took of his crown and loosened his topknot, his hair falling down nearly to his chin. I smiled to myself, when his face became covered by the strands for a moment. He laid his crown onto my bed table and then sat down beside me, laying his arms around my waist and pulling me closer.

Our kisses were even more passionate now and I pushed against his shoulders, laying myself on top of him, as I firmly held onto his hair to keep him where I wanted to have him. His hands stroke my back, up to my shoulder blades and down to my tailbone. I pressed my lower body to his hips which caused him to groan into my mouth. My skin was covered in goosebumps at that sensation and I gasped loudly when Zuko suddenly rolled me onto my back.

I breathed heavily and stared into his eyes, my need for him so strong that I was close to whimper. With no other man I had ever felt so aroused to whimper, but I was sure that I was going to do it sooner rather than later with Zuko.

He pulled my topknot open and let his hand run through my hair, before he pressed a kiss to my chin, then jaw and down my neckline. I pressed my head onto the mattress, gasping for air and wiggling my hips, until I could feel his on top of mine. I instinctively spread my legs to wrap them around his waist when I felt his arousal. I heard him hiss and felt his hot breath against my collarbone, when he pressed between my thighs.

I held him as close to me as I could, not caring that his body weight was practically crushing me, since it felt so good. My breasts against his chest, our stomachs and hips touched and my arms and legs wrapped round him. The hot and wet feeling of his tongue against my skin caused me to moan softly and I started wiggling my hips against his, feeling him pressing firmer against me. Groaning he began to grind against me and I lifted my hips, moving with him, tightening my hold on his head and arm.

This was overwhelming. I could clearly say that I had missed the feeling of a male body on top of mine for the last two years, but having Zuko on top of me was not only worth the wait, but woke much more emotions inside of me. My heart was totally in this and so it felt a bit different from previous experiences of making out.

Nevertheless I wanted more of him. My hand slipped between the folds of his undertunic to touch his bare chest, while the other one moved to his belt. I had longed to touch his bare torso for almost seven years now. Since the first time I had seen him without a shirt, actually. After I freed him from his brown and golden tunic, as well as his red undertunic, he did the same with mine. Underneath I was only wearing a turquoise brassiere which really seemed to fascinate Zuko, since he kept staring at it. I felt a bit smug, noticing him staring at my breasts, while they were still covered.

I clasped his cheeks and brought his mouth to mine again, kissing him with everything I had and moaning every time his erection would press against me. Zuko kept his pace steady for a while, but when I began to kiss his cheeks and jaw he got a bit faster and I reached for his pants to undress him completely.

He pulled his head away from me, supporting himself on an elbow and catching my hand on its way to his pants. "Kira, we…" His breath was heavy, his cheeks flushed and his lips slightly swollen. And he was looking at me like that.

My own need for air caused me to breathe heavily, so I couldn't articulate a full sentence either. "What?" I asked breathlessly.

Groaning Zuko pressed his eyes shut, let go of my wrist and pinched the bridge of his nose.

"We should stop here," he finally said in a soft and longing voice.

I frowned, since it was quite obvious to me that he wanted to go further.

"Should we?" I asked, my eyebrows raised.

"Yeah. We shouldn't precipitate anything." His hand gently stroked my cheek and I untangled my legs from him.

It was not really precipitating for me, since I had loved him for years now, but fine, okay.

All of a sudden a frown appeared on his face. "Especially since you'll leave tomorrow."

My cheeks flushed darkly, certainly as dark as Zuko's formal robes. Oh moon, I totally forgot about that.

"Actually…" I began, but didn't know how to proceed.

"What?"

I bit down on my lip and looked away from his face. "I… Maybe I'll stay."
His frown was not only one of confusion anymore, but I could see a little bit of anger there, too. "So you just decide to stay? I thought there was something extremely urgent! How can you just say that you'll stay?!"

I swallowed down my pain at his anger and narrowed my eyes at him. "Oh, I'm so sorry. I thought you wanted me to stay!"

"Of course I want that! But you can't just say you'll leave forever without any reason and decide to stay later!" He lifted himself from my body and sat down beside me. "Who does that? That is not how you treat people!"

I flinched at that and started to get up from the bed. What he had said hurt, but I could see where he was coming from. I knew it had hurt him when I had told him that I needed to leave and didn't give him a reason. Zuko had come a long way since believing that he was a failure and didn't deserve any affection, but I knew that he could still be hurt rather easily by the people he cared for.

Zuko propped himself on his hands and stretched his legs while glaring at me and I sighed.

"I know. I'm not doing that to play with your emotions or anything," I said softly and crawled onto the bed from its footboard, right up to Zuko's legs. I grabbed his knees and sat down on his shins. His eyes widened a bit. "I've… been having these feelings for you for quite some time now, but since they didn't go away or get weaker, I figured that it won't happen anytime soon. And I know that you need a wife and an heir and as much as I do want you to be happy and the Fire Nation throne to be secured I don't think that I could bear it to see you marry some other woman…" I averted my gaze in embarrassment as I felt heat crawling up to my cheeks. "Well, thinking about it, nothing has really changed. Just because we have got feelings for each other doesn't mean that we can be together. Your first concern should be the Fire Nation, so maybe I'm going to leave after all."

Zuko's expression on his face was one of disbelieve and surprise. Then he reached for my hips and pulled me closer to him on his lap, while he slid back to lean his back on the headboard.

I laid my hands on his shoulders and waited for him to say something.

"That is an understandable concern, but even if it won't be easy for us, please don't leave!"

I frowned and shook my head. "I'm glad you don't want me to leave, but I'm not staying here becoming your concubine while at the same time you bed your wife to get an heir. I won't lower myself like that. Not for anyone."

Zuko actually smiled at my words. "I understand, but you don't seem to understand me. I want you to stay, but I don't want you to become my concubine. I don't want to marry a noblewoman who only knows how to run a household or the rules for the life as royals. If you stay and if we continue this, then only with the expectation to stay together forever. Like any other couple."

My heart seemed to have stopped beating. My lungs didn't work anymore while I was staring at him. "What?" I whispered.

Zuko's hold on my hips became firmer. "Look, I have been thinking about this for a long time now and I think that the best way for us would be to be as any other couple. No expectation regarding marriage, but also no pressure for me because of an heir. If we work out we can think about marriage later, but first let's just… uh… have some dates and make out and all this other couple stuff."

My lips were slightly parted. "But it is your duty to…"

"Kira, stop! I won't let my job dictate me my whole life, especially nothing as private as marriage!" he argued.

"Zuko, you cannot just make that decision. You're already twenty-four, what if something happens to you and you don't have any heir?" I asked worriedly.

"Kiyi would become Fire Lord," he firmly stated.

I shook my head. "Kiyi has no royal blood. The nobles would rip her up."

Zuko took a deep breath. "I'm glad you're more worried about my country than your own life, but I can't say the same thing about me. Let's just be together and if it doesn't work out, then I'm going to create myself an heir. Satisfied?"

I narrowed my eyes at him again. "That still doesn't make sense. You're talking as if you could just marry me after a year of relationship."

"Well, yes."

"What? I told you before that I am nothing for you. Not from the Fire Nation, no noble, I'm a waterbender and I'm not even well known or famous or anything. I am nobody and you cannot be serious by saying you want to be married to me!" I was no partner for the Fire Lord and clearly he had to see that, too.

"You're right," he said and although I knew it too it still hurt hearing him say it. "But you studied Fire Nation economics, politics and history at the University of Roku, the most prestige university in the Fire Nation. You had the best grades from your year. You are one of the smartest persons I know and you have learned so many things while working for me. I don't think it is bad to have a smart wife instead of a noble one. The Fire Nation values progress and intelligence, so I don't think that marrying you would be a big problem."

I wanted to smile at him, for I felt deeply flattered, but I wasn't done yet.

"It goes against protocol!"

"I'm the Fire Lord. I can change protocol," Zuko replied with a slight smug smirk.

I sighed. "Don't get me wrong, I'd love to give it a try, to be with you, but I'm afraid that you will come out regretting it or that it will turn out to be a mistake, because anything could happen to you while we try to get to know each other on a deeper level!"

He pulled me closer again and pressed a kiss to my bare shoulder. "Then we must ensure that nothing will happen to me. I don't think that it will be difficult for you to save me from anything. You've proven so multiple times already. And I won't ever regret it. If I weren't sure of this, I would not tell you." His kisses continued down my arm. "But I've been thinking about this for a long time and I'm clearly not being rash."

"Zuko…" I wanted to say something again, but he had lifted my arm and nuzzled now the crook of my arm. My skin there was very sensitive and I shivered.

After a few seconds he let go of my arm and brought my face to his, kissing me again, but this time more gently and cautiously. It was warming my whole body, as I sighed and returned the kiss.

"Kira. Can we be like any other couple?" he murmured against my lips, but then he pulled back, clasped my cheeks and locked his golden gaze with mine. He swallowed and I noticed that he was slightly nervous. "Do you want to be my… girlfriend until we're ready for more?"

Although I was still afraid that he ended up regretting it I couldn't say no. I had loved him for so long now and I craved to be with him. If he thought that we really had a chance, even with marriage, then who was I to say otherwise?

A wide and happy smile spread on my face and I nodded. "Yes," I breathed.

Zuko gave me a warm smile which made me even happier, since I loved to see him smile. "Good. I was already thinking about how to convince you otherwise into this."

I raised my eyebrows. "You would have tried again?"

He nodded. "Yes. With the things which are important to me I always try again and again, until I get what I want."

I chuckled softly, since he was so right. That 'Never-give-up'-attitude was so much Zuko and one of the things I loved about him. "Well, you got me after the first try," I murmured, lowering my head a bit.

"And you me," he said in a hoarse voice, pressing his lips again to mine.

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