Adrien slunk into the living room of his classmate's house and tried to push away the feeling that he was practically breaking and entering, as well as trying to steal from her family. Technically, he wasn't breaking in as the door had been unlocked, for some unknown reason. He also promised himself that he would leave a nice amount of pay for them later; after all, he wasn't a thief.
He finally found what he had been looking for and without any noise he succeeded in his mission. At last, he could satisfy his stomach and it would stop making low growling noises that had stayed with him for hours after his last meal.
"What are you doing?"
Adrien startled at the familiar voice and felt his cheeks flush beneath the mask as he was literally caught with his hand in the cookie jar. The jar was filled with brown crunchy cookies which smelled of dough and he could sense a hint of cocoa and butter; he was positive they would taste delicious.
He was glad that it was dark and Marinette hadn't seen the embarrassment reflect from his face, but he was sure she knew exactly what he had been doing. He hastily and regretfully took his hand out of the jar and brushed it against his suit trying to get the pieces of cookie crumbs off his claws.
He wasn't sure what to say as it was well past midnight, he was in Marinette's home, not to mention uninvited, and trying to steal her snacks. He didn't even understand why he had stopped there in the first place. At one time he was hopping on rooftops, at ease with himself after his patrol with Ladybug, while forgetting all the problems that had built up in his life, and then he had found himself in front of the bakery's back door. He was hoping to avoid going back to his cold empty room, so he had snuck in, in hopes of appeasing his hunger.
"I was looking...for chocolate chip cookies." Adrien whispered with a small unsettled grin, he was not taking any risks of waking up her parents.
He had lowered his head in shame and avoided looking at Marinette, who was perfectly visible to him thanks to his night vision. After a long pause, he dared to peek at her and what he saw was just an astonished expression with the early makings of a smile cornered at her lips. He was confused and wanted to escape this situation; he hadn't interacted with Marinette as Chat that much, so he had no idea what her reaction would be.
"Those cookies only have nuts and raisins in them." He saw her pointing to the jar which had occupied his greedy hand moments ago and as she crossed her arms in a way that would be considered playful, she was already smirking at him.
He shook his head at her behaviour, because he didn't understand why she didn't react in any sensible way; seeing him at her house, past midnight and stealing her cookies - such actions should have been alarming enough. It seemed like she was used to strange things happening often and her stance almost indicated that she was comfortable with him being there. Her words didn't really make sense to him at first, he had been too nervous to see what she would be up to, but when he acknowledged to himself what she had noted, he was even more bewildered.
"Why aren't there any chocolate chip ones?" He inquired, still unsure of what he was supposed to do now that he had been caught.
Marinette had uncrossed her arms and was holding one of her hands in front of her mouth, and he realized that she was stifling her laugh. He didn't know what to think of this Marinette, who usually was so timid and stuttering in his presence when he was in his civilian form. He had seen her behave like that few times before, mostly when they had been fighting off the Dessinateur and it made him wish again that she was more open with him as Adrien.
She was holding out her hand for him to take and he stared at it for maybe a bit longer than it was acceptable. He hesitantly grabbed her offered hand and she pulled him gently by his wrist in the direction of her room upstairs. He panicked, why was she inviting him to her room, wasn't it supposed to be a sacred ground for girls? Especially after midnight. What was she doing up anyways? He didn't think he had made that much noise when he had trespassed on her home and unscrewed the cookie jar.
They crawled into her room through her opened door and she abruptly dropped his wrist from her hold as if it had burned her. He tried to ignore the jolt that had passed through his heart for a second. She looked around frantically and he wondered if Marinette was regretting her promptly made decision of letting him into her room. He couldn't blame her, they barely knew each other in these forms.
He closed the door behind him silently and felt extremely uncomfortable like he was intruding, which he was and he was still surprised she hadn't mentioned anything about it.
She was standing with her back turned towards him and he realized she had dragged him upstairs so he could get a chance to explain without her parents overhearing. She was waiting for him to say something and break the silence that had grown uncomfortable between them, but he had no idea what he could tell her, nothing would excuse his actions.
"Why are you here?" She asked so quietly that he had to strain himself to hear what she had murmured.
He fidgeted and looked for a way to approach the situation in hand in hopes of not sounding like a total creep. She turned around and he noticed for the first time how the moonlight, which was gleaming through the window, bathed her sleep tousled hair and serene features. She was wearing her sleeping attire, which thankfully covered most of her skin. He felt his throat close and he attempted to swallow the betraying feelings that threatened to appear.
"I-I was hungry?" He had managed to turn his statement into a question and he cursed his shaking and raspy voice. He knew that she expected a longer explanation for what exactly he had been doing in her house at that time.
Her eyes swept over his face that was still half hidden in the darkness and he wondered if she was trying to figure him out. She would have no luck, because he was completely at a loss of what he had just been thinking about as the blood rushed in his ears and tuned out every rational thought. He couldn't take his eyes off her.
Marinette tilted her head at him and he sensed that she could now see him more clearly than just shapes and that made him uneasy. She took a step closer and as much as he wanted to take a step back, all of a sudden afraid and anxious, he stood his ground. Her look was questioning as if she was searching for an answer he was certain she wouldn't be able to find.
"Are you okay?" Her voice was soft and tender and he apprehended that she could see right through him and all the walls he had built around himself.
It almost reminded him of Ladybug, who had been quiet on patrol and the only words spoken between them had been their usual greetings. Although she had surprised him before she took her leave at the end of their routine. She had rested a hand on his arm and sadly smiled at him, which made him believe that no matter how hard he had tried to hide his despondent feelings away, she had still been able to pick those up. He didn't think she knew him that well and it made his heart flutter that maybe, just maybe, there could be a chance for them in the future.
He had been silent for too long and he cursed himself for getting lost in the memories of the night's earlier events and portraying his solicitude too obviously. If he hadn't been Chat at the moment, his hands would have been sweating due to his nervousness. He could hear the blood ringing in his ears and his heart thumping wildly in his chest.
He raised his arm behind his head and scratched the nape of his neck, in his usual position ensued from his uneasiness, and his eyes widened, because Marinette might easily be able to connect it to Adrien since she had been quite observant that night.
"I'm not sure you'd understand." He settled on answering, disappointed that he wasn't able to converse with her as Adrien; it would have been so much easier to talk to her this way without any secrets between them, but he also remembered that she seemed to freeze up whenever he approached her so he pushed that idea away.
He was glad that Marinette hadn't stepped any closer and there was still a reasonable amount of space between them, he wouldn't count on himself to keep his rational mind with her being this close to him. Although he couldn't comprehend his feelings for her yet, because he unfortunately didn't know her that well to name them. There was also the strong affection for Ladybug that wouldn't go away that quickly, the thought of her actually caring for him made him warm inside. He didn't know how she felt about Adrien, but he hoped that she at least considered him a friend and friends looked out for each other, right?
"If I don't, I could at least listen." She offered and he admired Marinette's kindness that allowed her to let a stranger stay at her house and listen to them vent their problems to her in the middle of the night. He didn't deserve to be heard, she was supposed to be angry, livid even, but instead of an earful he got heartfelt words and a shoulder to lean on. He was mesmerized and that's why he wouldn't forgive himself for doing what he did next, all reason be damned.
He approached her, diminishing the distance, gently he grabbed her cheeks with his gloved hands and lowered his face down to connect her lips to his. His eyes closed instantly as the pleasure and heat that his actions brought on were starting to tear him apart. She gasped into his mouth; his lips were pressing urgently, but delicately against her slightly chapped and dry ones. His heart sank to the bottom of his ribcage as she didn't react in any form; her body had completely shut down.
He was now regretting his rushed actions, but as much as he knew he had made a mistake, surging her on when she had shown no visible attraction nor desire for him, he couldn't help but think that it had felt right. He hadn't been able to stop himself, she was intoxicating, as if he could never get enough of her. His thumbs brushed her cheeks and he so desperately wanted to feel the soft skin beneath his fingers.
She still hadn't responded and he felt embarrassment, shame and ache washing over him, and he abruptly let go of her as the shock transpired and he shuddered with remorse. What had he done? He had completely forgotten his sanity and forced himself onto her. His whole body started shaking when he came to the realization that he had betrayed his lady. He didn't deserve to have his feelings reciprocated. He had done the unforgivable, even if she someday deemed to pardon him, he could never forgive himself.
If he hadn't been distracted while battling with his sorrow and concerns, Adrien would have seen the abashed look on Marinette's bright red face. She had her mouth slightly open and her eyes were big and solely focused on Chat who was falling apart before her. She opened and closed her lips, trying to say anything, anything at all to break the tension that had grown even stronger now when Chat had crossed the unspoken line and thrown her whole world out of balance. It had been such a quick decision on his part that the response to the unfamiliarity was delayed and when she was about to kiss him back, he was already out of her reach.
"I-I am so, so sorry. I did-didn't think. I'm sorry." Adrien stammered and turned to look at a blushing Marinette who had been quiet the entire time and hadn't said a word since she had proposed him to share his troubles with her. He had ruined everything. How could he even look into her eyes tomorrow at school? Not to mention, he won't get any sleep after the madness he just pulled.
Hurriedly, trying to find another subject to talk about so he wouldn't have to explain something he had no excuse nor explanation for, Adrien looked around her room. His eyes stopped at the poster on her wall and he could sense his body give an involuntary jerk while his breathing became labored. It was a huge poster. Of him. On her wall. It wasn't the only one. There were countless pictures in different sizes on her bedroom walls, almost all of them were his modelling photos from various magazines he had worked for. Why did Marinette have posters of Adrien on her walls?
He curiously turned back to look at Marinette who looked mortified as she had seen what he had been staring at. When their eyes met, she shyly looked down and covered her blushing face with her hands. Did Marinette like him?
He was soaring, gliding through the air, his chest was bubbling with new feelings; feelings for Marinette, who had let him stay at her house, and ignored him acting like the idiot he was by trying to snatch cookies from her house. He had kissed her. Gods , he had kissed Marinette as Chat, while she seemed to have a crush on Adrien. He had truly fucked everything up.
"You were not supposed to see those." The soft voice woke him up from his daze and the reality of the situation came crashing down, he had to fix this mess somehow.
"Why not? Do you like him?" He asked teasingly. He knew that the answer was obvious, but he had to know for certain, she could have just been interested in the clothes he was modelling.
"It's embarrassing."
"No, it's not. You are allowed to fancy him, he's famous, isn't he?" He couldn't blame her for liking his photos and his appearance, he was a model after all, although he wished that she had seen him for who he really was, not only the image.
"That's not why I like him." There it was. It couldn't be more clear. He couldn't be happier. He considered her to be his friend, his first friend and it had always hurt him that she couldn't relax around him. Knowing, that she liked him and even more than a friend, left him speechless.
"Then why?"
She took time to think over the question, like she didn't really know how to answer it, but at the same time wanting to explain that it was more than a celebrity crush. That it was real.
"The first time I saw him, I was disappointed. I thought he was the same as Chloé, rude and obnoxious, content with making other people's lives a living hell. But when he gave me his umbrella on that day, I understood I had been wrong about him. I didn't expect him to be so kind, so honest, and it made my knees weak. I couldn't not like him after that."
"You haven't told him?" He remembered the day, his first day at school, it had started raining after their classes ended and he had yearned to make it up to Marinette after the misunderstanding with the chewing gum. She had liked him since then? She hadn't told him and he couldn't grasp what the reason was, because he had tried so hard to make her comfortable in his presence.
"I can't get even one sentence out of my mouth when I'm talking to him. Why would I even try? He doesn't notice me. He doesn't see me." Adrien was alarmed when he saw a few glimmering tears streaming slowly down her face and his heart gave a tight squeeze. Because he did notice her. But if he truly did, then wouldn't he have caught onto her feelings sooner?
She was looking at him with wide blue eyes and he wanted to tell her. He wanted to tell her everything. That he was Adrien. That after the miscommunication on his first day of school he couldn't stop seeing her everywhere he went. She had always been there, out of his reach, and now, when he realized that the reason she had stayed away was because she liked him, he was at loss what to do. Because all he wished for was to kiss her again.
He could feel her warm breath on his face, she had unknowingly stepped closer and was now intensely staring at him and he couldn't breathe . He unconsciously licked his lips and his eyes dropped to her mouth, her lower lip stuck between her teeth and at that moment he wanted her. He wanted her to close the distance and feel those soft lips again. His brain was becoming fuzzy and he thought he was dreaming when he finally felt them.
It wasn't more than a frail touch, as fragile as the lightest brush, and it drove him insane. He craved all of her. He deepened the kiss and she responded as eagerly as he was beginning to devour her, her fingers were tugging at his hair and grazed against his collarbone. He reached out and wrapped his arms around her tiny waist as if he would never let her leave his hold again. He tilted his head to get better access and she opened her mouth for his tongue to shyly caress hers. Her hands tightened in his hair and she brought him even closer than he thought was possible.
He felt the back of his knees bump against something hard and after she had pushed him down, he realized it had been her couch. She continued ravishing his mouth and he couldn't believe it was actually happening. Sweet and unsure Marinette was pinning him down on her sofa, both of her thighs wrapped around his lower half of the body. He drew small circles on her back, not daring to move his hands lower. Her delicate fingers skimmed down his chest until they reached the dangerous territory around his hipbones. Adrien could feel every sensation through his thin suit that she prompted which left him with no air in his lungs. He gasped and was saddened by the fact that he had to disconnect their lips for a few breaths until he had them flipped over, so now it was Marinette who was writhing under him.
He grabbed her wrists and placed them on either side of her head. He kissed her even more urgently, his tongue exploring her mouth while she enthusiastically responded. Disconnecting his lips from hers he moved them to her jaw and as she craned her neck to give him more skin to discover, he left light open-mouthed kisses all around before he picked a spot and started sucking on it firmly. He stroked the spot with his tongue a few times and proceeded to lick it more vigorously, fully intending to leave a mark there for tomorrow morning. He could feel her vibrating under him as her quiet sighs and moans filled the room. Satisfied with the result, he let go of her wrists and looked up. She had her mouth slightly open and her wide eyes were solely focused on him. He grinned wickedly and moved his lips back to her mouth while she grabbed his face to pull him against her.
Their bodies were so tightly wrapped together that he wasn't surprised when his erection made the suit he wore uncomfortable and he hoped it didn't ruin the mood. Marinette squeaked quietly as she definitely felt his hard on pressing against her thighs. She didn't stop, this only seemed to edge her on; his throat was dry when the raspy moan left his mouth and she rubbed her body against his erection, that only seemed to grow due to the attention she was giving to it. His claws began to toy with the hem of her shirt and they brushed against the bare skin that was exposed when the shirt was ridden up. She was driving him completely crazy. Lust makes hypocrites of us all. He felt coldness sweeping in and shivers dance on his body when unexpectedly the realization sank in and he jumped away from Marinette.
She was looking at him confounded, with her hands in her lap and his legs spread in the sitting position. He knew what she would be feeling right now. Humiliation, that she had let it get that far. He couldn't have her think like that when she meant so much to him.
"Did-did I do something w-wrong?" she lowered her gaze and was staring at her hands, trying to make herself as small as possible. He sat on the couch, not as close as they had been before, but not enough distance between them for her to think that he hadn't desired her. As much as it pained him to admit he had desired Marinette, despite what he was feeling towards another girl.
"No, you didn't. You are amazing. I just...I'm in love with someone else. It wouldn't be fair to me or to you to have continued this." She blinked as confusion washed over her face and when it suddenly clicked, her eyes grew wide and her lips parted just a little.
"Ladybug?" She asked dubiously and hearing her name spoken aloud killed him inside.
"I can't bear it. I can't hurt her." For the second time of the night he had forgotten his Lady and he had never felt so low in his life. He had done it couldn't he think clearly when he was near Marinette? How could his classmate and friend make him feel so much more than it was proper and how could she make him forget the one whose affection he had yearned for ages?
"I care about you and it breaks me down that for that reason, I must be the one to bring you pain."
"W-what do you mean? You don't even know me." Her voice was silent and he wished she hadn't caught him sneaking into her living room. He wished that it had never happened, because he was torn. He couldn't look at her eyes. Because he felt so guilty and he didn't want to do this to her. He let his transformation go and he knew it wasn't right that he had done it without consulting with Marinette first, but he knew that he had to be honest with her.
He didn't hear Plagg say anything, so he assumed he had removed himself from the scene and was leaving them alone, for now. He didn't hear how Marinette softly gasped, her eyes widening in wonder and shock. Her hands started trembling and she thought she was going to faint. Chat had been Adrien all along. She'd been rejecting him, so she could have a chance with him.
"My heart is with her. I fell in love with her from the first moment I met her. As much as I want to do this. As much as I want you. I can't do this to her. These feelings, they won't go away that easily. I don't think they ever will." He almost crumpled when he became aware that he couldn't give her what she desired. He couldn't be there for her, when he was entirely devoted to Ladybug. He couldn't be more than her friend. "I don't care who she is behind her mask, I will love her just the same."
In that instant, he made a mistake to look up and see her eyes watering with unshed tears and her teeth biting her lower lip to prevent the tears from falling down. She jumped at him, threw her hands around his neck and buried her head in his shoulder. He hesitantly wrapped his arms around her waist, not sure how to comfort her after he had pretty much broken her heart.
"I care so much about you that I was afraid to tell you the truth about me. I was so sure you'd be disappointed or that it would break us apart and I couldn't let it happen. I trust you with my life, kitty, why then didn't I trust you with my identity."
Her voice, not above a whisper, and the quiet shaky breaths between the words made him shiver. The shudders ran up his spine and his hands turned cold in sweat. He gulped and his hands were shaking, he felt like he was flying. She couldn't possibly be-? He couldn't deny what was before him. A small hand cupped his jaw and he turned to look at Marinette's blue eyes, but he only saw Ladybug. Marinette was Ladybug. Ladybug was Marinette. How hadn't he noticed? He couldn't believe he had been so dense. The girl he loved, loved him back and he didn't know how to deal with all those feelings that were all over the place.
"Marinette. It's you." He sighed and his whole body relaxed; where he had briefly felt dread, he now only felt pure joy. His smile grew and his happiness floated through the room. Marinette's hand moved to his shoulder, her smile so bright and vibrant. Adrien took a hold of her hand and pressed a soft kiss on her knuckles and for once she didn't pull away but warmly looked up to him. He glanced at her lips, so badly wanting to kiss her now that he had found out that the love of his life had been in front of him, or in that case sitting behind him, all this time. Adrien could feel himself move closer to her as she did the same, and he lowered his head to meet her lips once more.
His stomach decided to growl loudly at the worst moment possible and the noise snapped them out of their stupor. Marinette giggled and stood up to walk towards the desk. When she came back he saw she had a single cookie in her hand that he recognized had the similar appearance as the ones in the jar downstairs. She handed it over to Adrien while smiling innocently.
"My kwami loves chocolate chip cookies. That's why there aren't any left downstairs."
Adrien excitedly grabbed the cookie from her hand and took a bite out of the savory sweet. He swirled the bits around in his mouth to get a full taste of the cookie that was certainly from Marinette's family bakery and in that case, delicious.
"This is a raisin cookie." He uttered dejectedly and looked at Marinette with disappointment, his mouth formed in a pout and betrayal evident in his voice, that Marinette couldn't help but start laughing wholeheartedly. He didn't think he had ever heard anything that breathtakingly beautiful.