Voldemort's Guilty Secret
A/N It is 2'am and I have just got off work. I will get on to my other stories when I get proper internet, but for some reason this popped into my head. Don't blame me I need more sugar.
Very Short One Shot.
Voldemort eased his pointy toed boots off his aching feet and sighed he had had a hard day terrorising muggles and all he wanted to do was relax with a night cup of horlicks and his guilty pleasure. He had never meant to start he had always said he could stop if he wanted to but at some point he had become addicted to his sinful little delight.
Sitting in front of his roaring fire that now he thought about it he should have cleaned because fires should not sound like lions. Voldmort snuggled into his long fluffy dressing gown Wormtail had brought him for his birthday. He had had it specially made embroidered on it little muggles were being tortured by death eaters in a multitude of inventive ways on a midnight blue background. Voldemort had loved it and hadn't set Pettigrew's hair on fire for at least two hours.
Before he indulged in his sinful pleasure Voldie looked down at his little pink toes that stuck out the bottom of his dressing gown and sighed. And had a strange moment of self doubt. Was immortality worth it he thought to himself. There were glorious rumors out there about why he had sought an eternal life, power, money, sex, chocolate, the extermination of everyone that had ever picked on him at school.
When he really got right down to it he had first set out to achieve immortality because he never wanted to miss Coronation street. He was a big fan of the muggle soap opera and had started watching it at the orphanage when he was a child. When he realized that someday he was going to die and never again see the street again well he just had to do something about. If he got to squash a few people underneath his pointy toed boot to do so well he didn't care.
Well, he had to admit to himself that at the begging it had been about Coronation Street, but then one night one of his death eaters had brought for him a meal wrapped in a red and white cardboard box, it was fried chicken so delicious so magnificent that he had been completely overwhelmed by the flavour. It felt like there was an explosion of taste in his mouth. So when he had asked the death eater what was in the chicken he had been shocked and dismayed to discover that this taste delight was a muggle invention and that the ingredients were a secret.
From that night he swore that he would posses the recipe for this taste sensation. No, matter how many muggles and how many buildings he had to torture and destroy he would discover the thirteen secret spices contained in Kentucky Fried Chicken.
Just remembering the mouth watering flavour of the food Voldemorts' resolve was hardened he would one day find the secret recipe his pain and despair would be settled. Mind at rest the evil overlord settled back into his chair and brought his guilty pleasure into sight of the room. Flipping the little paperback book open he smiled he just loved Mills and Boon.
A/N Am I the only one that could see him reading Mills and Boon/Harlequin what ever you want to call them.