Sorry if Kuroki is a bit ooc(a bit? more like a lot). This is my first time writing a story and it probably sucks, but hopefully i'll become a better writer. Sadly none of the characters mentioned in this story belong to me.
Kuroki's POV
I lie face down on my small bed with the lower half of my body under my thin blanket. Despite it being the middle of Autumn, it was still pretty warm here in California. My face was covered with tears. I had been crying for about forty minutes, maybe more. I had a terrible headache and my throat was sore from sobbing. This feeling was new to me and I hated it. I clutched my 'Attack On Titan' pillow as memories started flashing through my head. They were memories that I didn't want to think about. The event was what caused me to be the way I am now, antisocial and unable to cry(until today).But I couldn't help but think about it.
*Flashback*
September 1, 2011
My sister Kyoko, our parents, and I stood in front of my grandfather with tears in our eyes. The only sounds that could be heard were our heaving breathing and the occasional beep. Grandfather was lying in a hospital bed with his eyes closed. He seemed as if he were dead, but I knew he wasn't because I could still hear the beeping of the heart monitor. His face was pale and he looked sick, but daddy said he would be fine. He said the doctors would give him medicine that would make him feel better. He said grandfather would be home soon. Daddy had said that two-no three weeks ago. Yet why was grandfather still here. We all wanted him back home so why couldn't he come home. Tears started to fall from my eyes. Now everything looked blurry. Kyoko wiped the tears from my eyes. I could tell she was trying not to cry. She was doing a pretty good job at it too. I'm surprised she hasn't broken down into tears. We were really close with our grandfather. We loved the stories he told about when he was a little boy. We loved his singing, even though he didn't have the best voice in the world. We loved his cooking. Even when it was a bit burned, it still tasted delicious to us. And most of all, we loved his hugs. Hugging grandfather was like hugging a giant teddy bear. He gave the best hugs in the whole world. We truly loved him. But with our parents it was the exact opposite. it wasn't like they hated him. It was more like they didn't want to be bothered by him. Maybe they didn't like looking after him. To them, grandfather was probably like having a third child. I was surprised at how they were looking at grandfather in a different way than they used to. They usually looked at him with an annoyed look on their faces. However, now they looked heartbroken. It was weird to see them like this.
September 9, 2011
I ran up the stairs and ran into Kyoko and I's shared bedroom. I slammed the door and locked it so no one could come in. Kyoko and I were usually glued by the hip, but i just wanted to be alone right now. Tears streamed down my face like a waterfall. I hurriedly changed out of my dress and into a pair of pyjamas. By the time I finished changing I was sobbing. It was a Friday, a day where everyone was ready to come home from school or work and finally get a break from all the stress and why did I feel so miserable. I tried not to think about the funeral, but it was impossible. Grandfather had died and he wasn't coming back. "I just have to face the facts and i'll get over it." I told myself. But it wasn't that easy. I layed down on the floor and stared at the ceiling. All of this crying was starting to give me a headache. My throat was kind of sore too and my nose was running. I heard footsteps coming up the stairs and tried to stop crying, but I couldn't. The footsteps got closer and closer until I could hear them right beside me. I looked up and screamed. "What's wrong? Why are you yelling?" My sister was staring back at ? How did she get in? The door was locked. My heart felt like it would leap out of my chest. I stopped crying, my grandfather's death momentarily forgotten. I was trying to figure out how she had gotten in. It wasn't as if she could just float through the door. She wasn't a ghost. Then I remembered a conversation we had once. It was about picking locks. She had learned how to do it from a video on the internet. She had thought it might come in handy one day. Apparently, all you needed was a hair pin. My heartbeat began to slow down as I realized she had just picked the lock. There was nothing supernatural going on. Calm down. "Nothings wrong. You just surprised me." She nodded her head and sat down on the floor beside me. Up closer, I could see that her eyes were puffy. She must have cried too. I did a mental facepalm. Of course she cried, she loved grandfather too. I'm such an idiot. I felt a bit guilty for locking her out of the room. I wanted to apologize, but I didn't really know how to word it. What if she started talking about grandfather. I didn't want to talk about him. I didn't even want to think about him. Finally after a lot of awkward silence I said"i'm sorry for locking you out of the room. I should have considered your feelings too." She looked at me and smiled."it's alright." In my opinion it wasn't. I was about to object when my mom walked in. Just like Kyoko and I, she had cried too."It's time f-for bed."Her voice broke in the middle of the sentence. "Mom,"Kyoko called out, but she ignored her. I wanted to hug her, but she quickly left our room.
September 19, 2011
I walked through the familiar hallways of my elementary school. I had been allowed to stay home from school for only one week. I wish I could stay home for a month, but that isn't how the system works. I had already missed two history tests and most likely a lot of work. I couldn't afford to miss any more days. I wish I was homeschooled like Kyoko. She didn't have to worry about tests, gym class, tests, disgusting lunches, and more tests. Mom and dad were easy on her since they were her parents. But we all aren't as lucky as her. I stopped walking and looked in the small hand mirror I had. I wasn't in the least bit surprised at what I saw. My eyes were puffy and had bags under them. These past few days were full of crying, sleepless nights, and more crying. Kyoko had cried too, but not as much as me. I turned a left corner and stood in front of my classroom door. I didn't want to go in. I didn't want to associate with people right now. What if I got close to someone and they died too. I would be even more miserable than I was now. I forced all the negative thoughts out of my head and sighed. I took a deep breath in then let it out. "Out with the bad, in with the good," I muttered as I opened the door and stepped in. All eyes were on me. It was silent for a few seconds and then i was bombarded with questions. Even Mrs. Goldson seemed a bit interested.
"Where were you?"
"What happened? Are you okay?"
"I started to think you were dead."
"I was sure you transferred to another school."
It was like I was famous and my classmates were the paparazzi. I wish they would shut up. They were so loud. Their voices were the only thing I could hear and it was giving me a headache. Just when I was about to yell at them to shut up, Mrs. Goldson interrupted them,"Now settle down class. Be quite." They ignored her and continued to ask me questions. The same questions were asked repeatedly. Over and over and over and over. I was about to sit down when a girl asked a particular question that made me freeze."Did someone die?" I bawled up my fists. That was it. "SHUT UP!"I yelled as loud as I could. Everyone immediately went quiet. Even the teacher was speechless, fore I was usually the quiet girl that sat in the back of the room and read manga all day. But I had Just yelled at the top of my lungs like it was completely normal of me. After that everyone ignored me. It was like I wasn't even there. They ignored me the following day, the day after that, and so on. I liked it better that way.
*Present day*
Ever since then, i've been antisocial and no matter what happens I never cry. I didn't cry when I broke my arm in seventh grade. I didn't cry when my crush turned me down. I didn't cry when my parents got a divorce. I didn't even cry when my dog, that I absolutely loved, died from lung cancer. Things that people normally cried about didn't affect me. My parents grew concerned and took me to a doctor when I was in the eighth grade. The doctor had put me on medication. It didn't solve the crying problem, but it somewhat kept my emotions in check. This was the first time that i had cried in years. All because of the disappearance of my twin sister, Kyoko.