The ninja turtles are copyrighted by Mirage and were created by Kevin Eastman and Peter Laird. This is a non profit fanfic so on with the fic.

Punctuation deficit corrected.

A ninja turtle reply to fanfiction.

Dear fan fiction writers

I appreciate your interest in my private life; I am flattered, if not deeply disturbed by all your well intended Fictions. However I just need to make a few things clear.

First, I am already a mutant turtle and there is no real need to mutate me even more; believe me it is bad enough as it is. I am partial to night vision though.

Second part a, my love life is more boring than you imagine. I swear I do not have any death wishes to go near Karai or Shredder or any of our sworn enemies. I have issues, but I am not, I repeat, I am not suicidal OK! And to tell the truth I am more concerned about Bishop at least Shredder just wants us dead not in a dissection table.

Second part b, should Raph or anyone else try to get the better of me; well let's just say they will never be able to reassemble the pieces and I am still bugging my creators to get a rematch because I deserve a rematch that battle was rigged! And I probably must have already made a celibacy vow or something considering the options, who could blame me? Come one who in his right mind would have anything to do with those three?

Third, I am a male, in the last movie you might question about the others but I have a male plastron see cup shaped! Heard that you blasted Moon witch?!

Fourth, I am not self hating or borderline lunatic; a little discipline is healthy and I am a creature of habit should you lived with my brothers, you would understand how chaotic a lair can be. While I was out they did manage to get the lair destroyed remember?

Fifth, I do not hate Splinter; so give him a break he did the best he could. He is a mutant rat with psychic and ninja powers, it is amazing he decided to look after instead of eating us. How more paternal can your get?

Sixth, my life off scenes is pretty calmed and dull; but the producers focus on my worst times, without giving you the whole background, So you get biased information you should see Mikey's bad times those are really scary not PG acceptable.

Seventh I am probably not all that technology impaired I have been shown driving choppers, the battle shell and I am the only one Don trusts enough to help him aside from April.

Eight I know you wonder but no I am not about to lose my marbles just an attitude problem that has already been solved. I would not go on killing rampage or turn into a serial psycho killer; I was appointed leader for that reason you know. Have you look around? who on his right mind would appoint any of those three bozos leader? it just gives me the chills to think about it; we would not have survived the first episode.

Ninth I do have a life of my own I just happen to love ninjutsu and coincidentally that is why you follow our many misadventures. Heard that Naruto we paved this way first! You owe us big time! You don't follow us because we are the genius turtles or the mighty brawling vigilante turtles or the Goof off collector turtles but the Ninja turtles and if it was not for me, believe me! you would not see much ninjutsu in the show.

Tenth…

A sound was heard and the turtle quickly clicked send.

Sincerely yours (Don't take it literally)

Ninja turtle Leonardo

Authors note. Poor Leo he always gets trashed in fics. OK I am guilty too. Thanks for reading and reviewing.