I got this idea after reading (another) Harem story. Most have no sense, no plot, no character depth. All they have is 'Naruto became loved by all the girls in (and out) of Konoha and f***ed all their brains out using shadow clones and the Clan Restoration Law. So partially inspired by that.

The song for the chapter is…

88 lines about 44 women.

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It was a wonderful afternoon. The sun cast a warm glow, the finches and bluebirds were chirping, the populace was happy… well at least most of the populace was happy. Three of those unhappy citizens just happened to be sitting in their favorite café, two sipping coffee after having lunch the other munching on the endless breadsticks that came with his spaghetti.

"Ah, it feels good to just sit back and relax and not think," Kiba said, taking another long schlurp of steaming coffee.

Shikamaru grunted in agreement, "Yah all that craziness that's been going on with Naruto is just troublesome. I wouldn't want to be in his position."

Kiba simply stared at Shikamaru.

"What? Don't tell me you think you could handle all of them do you?" Shikamaru retorted with amusement in his voice.

Kiba looked crossed and opened his mouth to respond but was cut off by his other companion.

"Isn't that Naruto over there?" Chouji asked using a breadstick as a pointer.

The other two turned and looked. It was Naruto, with his arms wrapped around Sakura on the left and Hinata on the right. Most people wouldn't recognize the latter though as she apparently sprouted a deep blue fox tail and ears due to direct contact with youkai, though she was the only one to do so. Even as the three watched in envy Naruto let his hands wander wherever they pleased, only stopped by the girls when they put his hands back on their behinds.

Kiba had the decency to not groan until after the three had left earshot. "How did that bastard do it? Yes he somehow magically got the backing of the Clan Restoration act; which no one had never heard of before, and is legally able to have multiple wives but…"

Shikamaru finished the sentence for him. "But how was able to not only nab Hinata, but also every other kunoichi our age, Tenten, Anko, Kurenia, and the Princess of Snow country… Am I forgetting anyone?"

"Well there's Kiba's sister and mother (insert Kiba shudder), that ANBU Captain with the purple hair, some girl named Isaribi, Ayame, and… I know I'm forgetting a few," Chouji answered, apparently not catching the sarcasm in his friend voice.

"Tsunade, though how she somehow became a teen again I'll never understand, something about kitsune youkai mixing with Genjutsu. And don't forget about the f***ing Kyuubi, I understand how that one happened even less than I do Tsunade. There's others but I don't want to be here the hours it would take to list all of Naruto's wives," Kiba finished.

The trio sat there for a few minutes, contemplating exactly how karma was paying back Naruto for all of the shit he's been through.

Finally Kiba voiced the one question they were all thinking, "Hey, if Naruto's got all those girls… whose left for us?"

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Just a little crazy oneshot to tide ya over till I finish watered down sensie. Funny or not? Either way leave a review.