Author's Notes – Because there are seven days and six friends, some of the characters swap places from time to time, although it should be fairly easy to follow the story line. The plot doesn't quite follow Friends, as the relationships between the Days and their personalities don't quite conform either. Roughly for the first chapter at least, here's how it goes,

Sunday – Chandler

Saturday – Monica

Friday – Phoebe

Thursday – Ross

Wednesday – Rachel

Tuesday – Joey (and also sometimes Ross)

Monday – Well, he sort of just alternates between Joey and the guy that hangs around the fringes and no one's quite sure what he's doing there.

The One Saturday Gets A New Roommate

Saturday, Tuesday, Friday, Monday and Sunday were sitting in a VIP coffee shop in the Upper House. This was back before they all hated each other, before the Will was even a twinkle in the Architect's eye.

"Really there's nothing to tell!" Saturday was saying as the others pestered her. Monday snorted.

"Come on! You're going out with the guy, there's got to be something wrong with him!"

"Its not even a real date." said Saturday after jabbing him sharply between the ribs. "Its just two people going out for dinner and not having sex."

"Sounds like a date to me." muttered Sunday from behind his newspaper. As the baby of the group, he didn't get out much.

Thursday slouched in with a dejected expression on his face.

"Hi." he said bitterly as he slumped down onto the sofa.

"This guy says hello and it makes me want to kill myself!" said Tuesday, shaking his head. The others ignored him and called on Thursday for an explanation.

"Dawn kicked me out." he muttered darkly.

Each of the Days had three principle servants to be at their beck and call, to fulfil all their whims and fancies. This included filling in for blind dates. Thursday had been going out with Monday's Dawn, had. Friday squinted at Thursday and then started plucking investable thing away from around his head.

"Friday stop!" he cried irritably, batting her hand away. "Stop cleansing my aura!"

"Oh but,"

"No just leave my aura alone!"

There was silence for a while before Thursday asked,

"Dawn says I'm too uptight, that's not true is it?" asked Thursday. The others all looked away awkwardly and his eyes flashed.

"Well answer me!" he growled furiously and Tuesday raised an eyebrow.

"No, you're really mellow." said Tuesday sarcastically. Thursday wasn't very good at recognising this form of whit and he waved a hand at Tuesday in defeat. Then he leant back and groaned,

"It's not fair! I, I just want to be in a relationship again!"

At this point the doors of the coffee house opened and a very thin and pretty denizen in full naval gear rushed in. All the days looked up in surprise as she ran over to the counted.

"And I just want a million roundels!" cried Tuesday hopefully.

"Hi, I'm looking Saturday?" said the woman to the denizen behind the counter. Saturday rose and frowned in confusion.

"Wednesday? Is that you?" she asked and the woman turned in relief.

"Oh my Architect, Saturday! I've been looking all over for you!"

"Honey what are you doing here? I thought you were supposed to be getting married to the Mariner soon."

Sunday's younger brother was currently Duke of the Border Sea, a position that ought to have been Wednesday's by all the normal rules but which the Architect had preferred to 'keep in the family'. So instead Wednesday was just around in an advisory capacity.

"I was!" cried Wednesday, dropping into the last place on the sofa and closing her eyes like she'd had a very exhausting morning. "But, oh everything's gone wrong! I don't know what to do anymore! Nothing makes sense!"

"Can I get you some coffee?" asked the waitress.

"De-caff." said Saturday firmly as she perched on the arm of the sofa and rubbed Wednesdays back in a supportive way.

The coffee came and she started explaining her predicament art top speed.

"So there I was on the deck of the Flying Mantis and I see this seagull land on the water. So I'm watching it for a while, then it occurs to me that I'm more excited about seeing this seagull than I am about getting married! I don't want to be married, it's just so boring!"

"Uh, right, but what's mother going to say when she finds out you ditched my brother?" asked Sunday, who never lost an opportunity to remind everyone that he was the son of the Architect. Wednesday's shoulder slumped and she stared off into space in despair.

"I suppose I'll have to call her." she said unenthusiastically.

.

.

.

"Mistress, Mis—Mistress please just listen to me!" cried Wednesday.

She had been on the phone for over half an hour and she was pacing up and down the sitting room in Saturday's penthouse apartment. The other Days were pretending to be occupied whilst actually eavesdropping. Wednesday put a hand to her forehead in a flustered manner.

"Mistress, all my life I've been the stupid Day!"

She paused as the Architect said something on the other end of the line and then scowled.

"Well I don't want to the wall-flower anymore!"

Another pause.

"What? No! No I don't want you to buy me flowers! I – It's a metaphor Mistress!"

Yet another pause.

"That's what I'm saying! I don't want you to support me anymore! Well, maybe I'll just stay here with Saturday!"

Everyone looked around at Saturday.

"Well I think we've established she's staying here with Saturday." she said matter-of-factly.

Just a few minutes later Wednesday was sucking air in and out of a paper bag.

"Honey don't worry, this is good for you! Living independently. You can't live off the Architect for ever!" said Saturday bracingly.

"I know that's why I was getting married!" moaned Wednesday. "Oh what am I doing?! I can't handle living alone!"

"You won't be alone." said Tuesday, sliding over and smiling. "I'm always popping in and out of the university so you have any trouble, you come straight to me."

Friday clipped him around the ear.

"Tuesday she's having a panic attack! Stop hitting on her!"

Wednesday got up and resumed her pacing. Sunday checked his pocket watch absently.

"Well, not that this isn't loads of fun, I have to get going. I have a meeting soon."

Wednesday watched him gather his things in a briefcase.

"So, you all have jobs?" she asked uncertainly.

"Um, yes?" said Monday. "That's how we, you know, pay for things?"

"Right…maybe I should get one of those things." Wednesday mused.

"Maybe you should." agreed everyone.