A/N: (Fanfare) Welcome, welcome to Fragments mark 5! See, version One was in a notebook, version two was it written up, version three was the edit and the title change from 'The Day the Dream Died' to Fragments, version four was when I went back to add stuff in and this is version 5- the final proof-read product! If I missed anything, I'm very sorry… Willowwind, I really, really hope you like it! I know I didn't know what to get you, so please accept my gift to be the time, effort, and amount of goodwill that went into this! (CoughCHEAPcough) I really tried my hardest for it. I hope you have a really great birthday, anyway!
Disclaimer: Even if I DID own it, I've just given it to Willowwind!
Fragments
Time to change and leave the past behind… Why should we know all the answers or how the story ends? So, let's take a chance on a happy ending…
Storm clouds were gathering over the Tokyo suburb of Domino City, black and heavy. People hurried about below them regardless, waiting for the thunder and lightning to start; to rumble and shout and flash over them all, until eventually petering out some hours later. It was a sight Téa was waiting for with huge anticipation. She loved the sounds, the beauty of the lightning, the power of the storm. And she loved the eerie feeling as the eye of the storm passed over you, and you stood in the relative calm, the wind rippling around you. It had been a long time since they'd had a good storm…
However, it seemed that it wasn't meant to be. Her periodic checks out the window, unable to concentrate on the lessons, revealed that the clouds were slowly paling out to a thick, sludgy, grey colour. All that could be done was to sigh and try to pay attention to QIxT, standing out in red ink on the blank, white board…
Of course, the physics lesson was not the most thrilling thing in the world. Her mind drifted again, but this time her gaze did not fall on the window, instead scanning around the white washed walls of the classroom. The clouds were not the only things that were grey. Ryou, to, had gone paler even then usual- even though it was kinda hard to tell sometimes. He looked about as enthralled with the Physics of calculating a coulomb as he did; in fact, his eyes were closed, his head lying heavily on one of his hands. He was slumping forward so far that his nose was almost touching the varnished brown wood of the desk in front of him.
Now, for all the other students, also looking bored, this was not an unusual sight. But Ryou was always so attentive; yet now he looked like he was about to drop off. Or faint.
Concerned, Téa ripped a corner out the back of her book, and scribbled him a message: Are you alright? Then, her eyes flicking briefly up to the front of the room to make sure she wouldn't be caught, she tossed it lightly across the aisle, where it skidded along his desk a few centimetres and ended up almost directly underneath his nose.
He opened his eyes slowly, surprised. She watched as his eyes flicked over the short message. She liked watching him read, at times like now, when her mind was idle. He spoke easy, fluent Japanese- but reading and writing was a constant trial to him. It was amusing on longer words, watching his brow furrow in confusion, his eyes narrow as he scanned every whirl and line of the symbol, his mouth moving as he mutely sounded the word out to himself. She knew it must be frustrating- he was a fast reader in English- but today his difficulty was worrying, not amusing. The words were simple and familiar; even when he'd first come he hadn't had trouble with them…
Just then, however, he looked up at her. He smiled that smile he did, that didn't convince her, and gave her a little wave.
If he thought that that would ally Téa's fears, he was sadly mistaken. She was like a dog with a bone…
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"You're not fine." Téa insisted loudly, to be heard over the chaos of the canteen. All around them, people seemed to need to be very loud in order to eat their food. A great part of the excitement was due to how the grey outside had given way to white- swirling, dancing, falling from the sky. And Téa was glad- she preferred snow to a storm any day. However, at that precise moment in time, her main priority was badgering Ryou about his health. Some more. "Do you guys think he looks ill?" She demanded.
"Well…" Yugi began hesitantly. "You do look a bit… rough, Ryou…"
"More then a bit!" Téa injected.
"He looks like death warmed up." Joey said conclusively around a mouthful of hamburger, as if that settled the matter.
"I think you should go home." Téa told him.
"I feel fine!" Ryou lied. He forced himself to eat one of his chips to prove it. Hopefully he could finish the conversation before it decided to come back for an encore.
Téa raised an eyebrow. She really was getting rather good at staring people down. Maybe it was all those arguments with Kaiba…
Ryou felt too tired and too dumb to argue with her right now. "Okay, I'll admit to having a little cold…" He admitted reluctantly, hoping that would pacify her. He had a headache… why wouldn't she just shut up…?
"I think it's more then that." She said, primly, as she stood up and collected her blazer and bag. "Come on, Ryou- we're going to the nurse."
"Téa, really, it's-" He protested, wearily.
"Don't even try to say you're fine." Téa said sternly. "You are going to the nurse. Even if I have to drag you there by your hair."
"You do that." Ryou muttered irritably. Really, he was comfortable here. It was a relief just to sit here and not have to pay attention to anything. Téa was probably glaring at him, but it didn't matter- he couldn't see it if he didn't look at her. Nothing she could say would convince him to go, however much he hated arguments. He appreciated her as a friend, but right now he just wanted to be left alone…
A hand grabbed hold of his wrist and dragged him none-to-gently away before he even had time to say 'Hey!'.
"Poor Ryou." Joey laughed as they disappeared out the doors. "Téa always has to fuss…"
"You know what she's like." Yugi shrugged, a certain fondness in his eyes. "She worries about us all- Ryou more then anyone. Y'know, 'cause he lives alone and all…"
"It's not like he can't look after himself." Joey snorted. "Although, he does look sick. Then again, when doesn't he?"
"It's just Téa." Tristan rolled his eyes. "She's a total mother hen…"
She really was. She loved her friends like the siblings she'd never had. She cared, listened to them, advised them (Sometimes even when they didn't ask for it), defended them against anyone, and stood by them no matter what they'd done.
It's strange how fast some things can change.
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By the time Téa returned to the lunch table, alone, the others were almost finished with their lunches. Or, in Tristan's case, with Ryou's. Tristan had forgotten his, and Ryou didn't want his, so it was the perfect compromise. Téa slid back into her seat among them and realised what she'd forgotten.
"His stuff…" She groaned, looking at Ryou's bag and coat still lying idly at the table. "He didn't pick it up…"
"You didn't exactly give him much chance." Tristan pointed out in amusement.
"I'll drop it round to him later." Yugi promised hastily, before Téa could respond. "I think I live closest…"
"No, I'll do it!" Téa volunteered. "You may live closest, but it's on my walk home!"
Yugi looked at her, not sure whether to laugh or protest. She was treating it like some sort of contest. He knew she just wanted to go and check up on Ryou. What he didn't know was if he should let her… "But… I don't think the snow is going to let up, Téa… you should really maybe get the bus…" He nodded to the window, where the snow had graduated to an all-out blizzard the likes of which hadn't been seen since their grandparents were kids.
"I like walking in the snow! Besides," Téa continued, playing her trump card now. "Didn't you say you had to do all the stock taking in the shop tonight?"
"Yeah…" Yugi sighed in defeat.
"And then there's that Romeo and Juliet essay…"
"I know."
"And the 'impossible' biology questions…"
"Téa! I know!"
She smirked. Yugi was fun to tease sometimes. But he always looked so miserable afterwards- like those old 'Sad Sam' toy dogs that were so popular in the way back when- that you couldn't help but make it up to him when he looked so downcast… "I'll come over and help you with them later." She promised, smiling.
"Really?" Yugi perked up immediately, smiling. "Are you sure it's not too much trouble?"
"I have to do them as well, you know." She replied easily. "And I only need to type my essay up now. Of course it's not too much trouble!"
"With you," Yugi replied, shaking his head in a mix of exasperation and wonder. "Nothing ever is."
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Téa, having been last out of the classroom after she'd helped the teacher to clean up, was surprised to see Joey and Tristan still hanging around in the corridor. Usually, when the final bell rang, they were the first out, you couldn't see them for the dust.
"What's going on?" She asked, approaching.
"He's lost his bus fare." Joey snorted, jerking a thumb at his companion, who was empting his bag out onto the dusty brown floor of the corridor. "Anyway, I've got something to tell you! You were so busy trying to drag Ryou off that I didn't get chance before!"
"Fine, fine…" Téa held her hands up in surrender. "But it's not like he was going to take himself, was it? Now, what do you want to tell me?"
Joey beamed from ear to ear, positively glowing. "Serenity's coming here!"
Téa found herself smiling to. "Great! When?"
"Saturday." He replied. "Mom's going away overnight so she figured she would come here for the day." His face clouded. "You will come and say hi, right? I mean, she'd be really disappointed if she didn't get to see your face… Though I don't know why…" He smirked.
Téa made no verbal reply, only swatted him on the arm. "Of course I will! Nothing short of hacking off all my limbs would stop me!"
"I don't doubt it." Joey snorted. Then he added, frustrated: "Come on, Tristan! Haven't you found it yet!"
There was some dark mumblings from where the point-headed person was still squatting on the floor, angrily cramming things back into his bag. He was saying something about having to walk all the way home in the cold in a blizzard that would delight in freezing him… He turned his face upwards, and found his eyes level with a hand, offering a collection of coins and the correct fare.
"You can use mine." Téa said, willingly. "I'm walking anyway, I'm stopping at Ryou's on the way…" She indicated the extra bag and coat she was holding.
Tristan nodded gratefully, standing and accepting the money. "Thanks. I'll pay you back tomorrow."
"You don't have t-" Téa began.
"I'll pay you back tomorrow." Tristan repeated, firmly.
"Well… When you can…" Téa agreed, reluctantly. The three of them began to make their way towards the front doors.
"Just don't stay at Ryou's too long." Tristan warned. "You'll only catch whatever he's got and I doubt he'll be in the mood for guests."
"I won't!" Téa assured him. "I'll just drop the stuff round and go. If he doesn't need any help, anyway."
The two boys exchanged looks over her head. Joey rolled his eyes. Téa would go into overdrive. That poor, poor boy…
"Well, tell him to make sure he's better by Saturday." Joey dismissed, opening the door and allowing his peers out before him. "He helped 'Ren with some Algebra or something last time she was here- couldn't make head or tail of it, myself- and she wants to thank him. Anyway, see ya!"
He began to walk off across the playground, quickly disappearing into the snow. Téa wiped some of the stuff off her eyelashes before turning to Tristan, who was muttering darkly to himself again about how not everyone could be good at maths. She grinned.
"Don't worry." She said, quietly, hugging Ryou's coat to her in an attempt to prevent the inside from getting wet. It smelt pleasant. She'd have to find out what washing powder he used… "I don't think Serenity's the type to be won over based entirely on mathematical ability."
Tristan stared. "How did you…?"
Téa laughed. "You make it painfully obvious." She turned to watch the snowfall. "No, I don't think 'Ren's given her heart to anyone yet. You still have a chance. And, between you and me… I think you've got a better chance then Duke, at any rate."
He looked embarrassed, then smiled, and they headed off towards the bus stops. That was where Téa left him, and she hurried along pavements; her footprints leaving grey, tarmac-coloured holes in the thin layer of white. She didn't know that the next time she made footprints anywhere, they'd be a third, rounder, print…
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Ryou wasn't quite sure if he was asleep or not. The fact that he was considering the idea would certainly suggest that he was awake. But he didn't feel awake. Indeed, the nurse had barely even spared him a glance before deciding that he needed to go home. When no-one could come and pick him up, she'd escorted him herself. And he had just gone along with it. Even when he'd got home, he'd just… sat for a while. Then he had forced himself to get up and grab a drink, sort a few things out… and he'd been sitting here since, just curled up on his armchair, sitting slightly sideways with his head resting at the top of the arm, so he could watch the snow fall outside. And he'd just sat there. He'd never done that before. Never felt so out of it…
Ryou gave up the struggle for coherent thought, and let them wander idly, half-formed, around his head. He was falling asleep. Maybe he already was. He wasn't quite sure.
His half-open eyes caught sight of Téa on the other side of the street, which was the advantage of living on the top floor- although all the kerbs had been obscured by the snow, and the only way to judge the difference between pavement and road was where the cars were parked- and she was heading his way. Ryou shut his eyes. He had gone home. What more did she require of him…?
For a moment, he seriously considered not answering the door when she eventually rang. He'd just claim he had been asleep, and as she was convinced he was ill, she'd buy it. He was almost asleep. It wasn't too much of a lie…
However, Ryou had always made sure he kept his manners pristine. He wasn't sure quite why, but he did his utmost to keep his cool and stay polite at all times. Either he was just desperate for people to like him, or he was afraid that the slightest slip would give his darker half an opening. That, he did not want.
Eventually, his buzzer went, meaning Téa had reached the block of flats and was waiting to be let inside. Ryou pulled himself up, and plastered a smile onto his face in preparation.
After all, one did not leave someone standing out in the snow on the doorstep. It just wasn't cricket.
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Téa took about half of her usual route, but, on reaching the roundabout at the bottom of the road, she neglected the instinctual right turn that lead in the general direction of her house in favour of a left turn that would take her to Ryou's block. As the flats loomed in the distance, she kept a look out, craning her neck upwards, for the signs of the arm chair at the window. They didn't all visit Ryou's flat often, as space was so tight, but when they did, that chair was highly contended for. Ryou's living room was neat, tidy, and tastefully decorated by the previous occupant, but rather bare. The only chairs were the arm chair itself and a small, two seater settee that there didn't really seem to be a purpose to. Oh, there were theories, but Ryou had yet to confirm any of them. That old arm chair, however, was comfy and cool, because it reclined. None of the others had a reclining armchair. Even though Ryou always struggled to find enough chairs for everyone, borrowing them from other flats and producing cushions seemingly out of nowhere, it was always like a game of musical chairs to see who got that prized place. Indeed, in their friendship group, it was often lovingly called 'The Throne'. In it's position so close to the window, it was an easy way for her to find where Ryou lived- she'd never remember which block it was, otherwise…
Aha. There. A tell-tale sign of brown fabric. She headed purposefully towards it, huddling in the doorway as much as possible. She liked walking in the snow, but this was just ridiculous. She could barely see the other side of the road! Still, it looked like it was slowing down- which she didn't want. It wasn't deep enough yet…! Sighing, she hit the number for Ryou's flat. He'd obviously seen her coming, because he buzzed her up almost immediately, without saying a word. The door unlocked, and she pushed it open, gratefully stepping into the relative warmth of the lobby. She considered taking the lift, but then thought better of it, taking the stairs two at a time instead. When she finally reached the correct floor, Ryou was standing in the doorway, waiting for her, smiling as always, although he still looked ill. His face may have lost it's ashen grey hue, but the white, paler even then his hair, wasn't much of an improvement, especially considering the unattractive contrast with the red lingering around his cheeks and forehead.
"Hello." He said, simply.
"Hi." She replied. "I brought your stuff." She held it out to him.
"Thank you." He took it.
They stood for a moment. Then, perhaps as he realised Téa wasn't going to leave so easily, or as his good manners won the internal battle, he stepped aside and gestured at her to go in.
The very first thing that hit her was the temperature. It was as cold in here as it was outside in the snow. The very second thing that hit her was a very nice smell.
Frowning, she dived straight into the niceties. "Did I wake you?"
He shook his head, before adding: "But it was close…"
"Oh, I'll get out from under your feet in a minute, then…" She said. "But… why is it so cold, Ryou?"
He looked genuinely puzzled. "Is it? I can't say I've noticed. I was hot…"
"Yeah," She smiled "But you're not really an accurate judge of temperature right now. You have a fever, right?"
He didn't answer, which presumably meant yes, but he was unwilling to admit it.
"Still, you can't stay in a cold flat! It's freezing! Not healthy! Not healthy! No!" She insisted. "Where's your thermostat? I'll sort it out…"
"Téa…" he protested mildly. "You really don't need to… I can…"
Of course, she wasn't listening. He knew from experience, they all did, that sometimes- well, most of the time- it was better to just let Téa get on with it. So, admitting defeat, he returned to his famous arm chair and waited for her to deem his flat suitable for habitation.
"Okay," She said on her entrance a few minutes later. "I've turned the thermostat up, and closed that window you left open- I hope you just forgot about it because opening a window in the middle of a snowstorm is really stupid- and I've made…sure…that…" She trailed off. "I'm taking this whole 'helping' thing a little too far, aren't I?" She smiled sheepishly.
"…Just a little." Ryou conceded.
Téa laughed. "Stop being so nice about it."
"Alright, a lot." Ryou admitted, adding "Mother Hen."
"I know." Téa sighed, flopping dramatically down onto his sofa. "But I just worry about you guys, I can't seem to help it…" Ryou made no reply, so she decided to change the subject. "Anyway, what's that gorgeous smell?" She demanded.
"Lemon water."
"What?"
"A slice of lemon in hot water." He elaborated, smiling a little at the memories it brought. "My mom used to swear by it when any of us felt… under the weather. I don't think it actually does anything, though. So, how are things going between you and Yugi?"
The abrupt change of subject, as intended, startled Téa. There was nothing going on! Why couldn't people get that!
She stammered for a moment, but then hit on the perfect answer. "Apparently not as well as they're going between you and Serenity." She teased, lightly. "Joey demands that you get better by Saturday. She's coming down for the day and wants to thank you for some help, or so he says."
Ryou was suddenly glad his face was already red.
Téa had finally realised how tired Ryou looked. Sure, he kept that smile on his face; but sometimes she wondered how often it was a real one… She suddenly realised how little she actually knew about him, considering she considered him one of her friends. It wasn't anyone's fault, but he was so quiet, and then when you were running around trying to save the world, it kind of got pushed to the side. She knew he lived alone, and that he had come here from England, but had never really got around to asking why. In fact, that slight, passing mention was the first time she'd heard him even confirm he had parents, now that she thought about it… Still. Used to swear to by it? Did that mean…?
"Ryou…" She began, uncertainly.
"Look, the snow's stopped." He said, quietly.
"Huh?"
He nodded at the window partly behind where he was sitting. "It's stopped snowing."
Téa stood quickly. He was right. "I'd better go." She said. "Before it starts again. I'm already wet enough…"
She headed out towards the front door, Ryou behind her.
"What were you going to say?" He asked, and, again, she could see the weariness in his eyes. She wondered if it was just down to the illness… She'd never really looked before… Never really took an interest, she supposed. Some friend she was…
"Téa?" He prompted.
She hesitated, but something inside told her now was not the time to go delving into his mysteries. She wasn't even sure if he'd want her to know. So she let it be. "I was just wondering what kind of washing powder you used!" She blurted.
He looked confused. "Oh, um… I'm not sure, let me go look…"
"No, it's fine." She assured him. "I really have to go. I promised to help Yugi…"
"I'll walk you down." He offered. He always went down the stairs with them; it was just something he did. Today, however, Téa was having none of it.
"No way! You are not coming all the way down those stairs with me! Not when you're sick!" She waved her arms at him to get him to go back inside. "I'm perfectly capable of looking after myself!"
"As am I." He replied meaningfully. She just laughed and headed away down the stairs. Ryou went back inside his flat, closing the door, and flopped down in the arm chair in some relief. He could stop acting a lot better then he felt now. Maybe he would get some sleep… a kip did sound good right about now…
However, he would be rudely awakened very, very soon. Half-dozing, he watched Téa checking the road. He saw her step out; he saw her slip, and he saw the car swerve to avoid her. And he saw the car skid itself, rolling over and up the steps of the building, ending up right where he would have been standing had he insisted on walking her down. He saw the wheels continue to spin, as though the car could continue it's journey whilst lying on it's side.
Everything else was still.
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Téa pulled her coat tighter around her- the snow may have stopped, but it was still cold. Time to hurry down to Yugi's and give him a hand with those biology questions…
As she reached where she figured the kerb was, she automatically checked the road, as she had done on every crossing she'd happened across since she was old enough to know that being hit by a car wasn't all that great for your health. Nothing was coming into the street; it was a generally quiet area, and it was too early still for the nightly commute home. Looking the other way, there was a single, solitary car heading along. She weighed it up. It was approaching slowly, taking care on the ice and snow. She could make it easily.
It's a pity she didn't take the same care against ice as the car did.
She stepped down onto the road, first one foot and then the other. The snow she was disturbing moved and protested as she did so. She loved the crunching sound fresh snow made. She travelled across the road, first one foot, then the other, right, left, right again, left… Wanting to get out of the cold as quickly as possible, she walked briskly. Right, left, right, left…
Without warning her right foot missed getting a firm hold, slipping on the ice. Her right leg followed suite, her body being dragged down to. Before she knew it, she was lifting her head from the snow, dazed, only to find herself staring at the oncoming car. Too late to stop, it swerved, but hit the same ice she'd just fallen foul of, skidding out of control.
And that was the last she saw of it.
The driver had seen her fall, slowly and gracefully, but it had been too late to stop. His reactions had kicked in and he'd pulled hard on the wheel, desperately trying to avoid her. He was just a chauffeur, not an F1 racer- he wasn't used to such sharp turns. He tried to avoid her, goodness knows he tried, but the car was no longer his as the ice caught hold of the wheels and spun them round, hurling them over the pavement, bumping over something, rolling and crashing into the steps up to the doorway of a block of flats, coming to rest half way up them.
Some of the wheels were still spinning.
But that was all.
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Ryou stood up. He didn't know what to do yet, but at least on his feet he felt more like he was doing something. For a foolish moment, he thought he should phone Yugi. But then the moment passed, and he ran over to the phone and called an ambulance, begging them to be fast. To be faster then the other one, to be there in time. After, he was half way down the stairs before he realised that, until the car was moved, he wouldn't be able to get out of the front door. He continued down regardless. If there was a way out, he'd find it- sick or not. He felt more sick now then he had before, but all he could do was hope, over and over, with every breath, that nobody had been hurt.
Please, don't let anyone have been hurt…Not now. Not again…
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The first thing she saw was Yugi. He looked worried.
"What's wrong?" She asked drowsily. It felt oddly like she had swallowed cotton wool and it wasn't digesting properly. He jumped, and then broke into a smile.
"Téa!"
"Yes?"
"Téa." He repeated, managing to refrain from hugging her, and squeezing her hand instead.
Her head wasn't clearing. She still felt sleepy. "Yes?" She said again, smiling herself.
He was still smiling. His eyes still looked worried. "Téa… You had an accident. You're in hospital."
She sat up slowly, looking around. "Oh, yeah." She realised. "What happened?"
Yugi shrugged uselessly. "I'm not quite sure." He admitted. "Ryou phoned me when you got here, but he was a little…stressed. Flustered. You know what he does, mixing his languages up. From what I can gather- and my English isn't that good, you slipped on some ice and got hit by a car." He paused to let her take this in. "But it only just got you." He tried. "Oh, Téa…I'm just so glad that it didn't…and you didn't…"
Téa hushed him gently. She needed quiet to think. She couldn't quite get her head round this… he said she'd been hit by a car. But she didn't feel any pain. Just… sleepy. She couldn't have been- she was alive, surely that was proof enough… But, now that she came to think of it, she did remember leaving Ryou's… and then there was a car… Something about a car…
In order to give her brain a rest, she took a proper look around where she was. She'd already established that she was in a hospital, but not much beyond that. She had her own room, that was something. The walls were not curtains, they were solid, and an off-white colour. There was a window giving a lovely view of the floodlit carpark, somewhat improved by the snow. It was dark outside already? The view was slightly obscured, however, by Ryou's head, sitting on one of the three chairs underneath the window. He was asleep, although he didn't seem to be too comfortable, tossing a little.
"Is he alright?" She asked, nodding at him. Somehow, for the moment, it was easier to concentrate on her friends then her own predicament.
Yugi couldn't help but smile. He couldn't help but think that Téa's confusion, her slight dopiness, would be the after-effects of the painkillers and mild anaesthetic they'd given her. That was to be expected. What wasn't as expected was the way she was still more concerned about Ryou's cold, or flu, or whatever it was, then herself. Typically Téa.
"You're the one in hospital." He reminded her gently.
"I know, but…"
Yugi spared a glance at Ryou, shrugging. Knowing Téa would not be content with a simple answer, he gave as much detail as he could. "I don't know, really. It didn't really come up in conversation for long. I said he should go home, but he said he wanted to stay. That was the end of it. He can't be feeling too great, though. He fell asleep an hour or two ago."
"Then…" Téa computed slowly. "How long since…?"
"Ryou put the call in for the ambulance almost seven hours ago."
Téa blinked.
"Well, six hours, fifty-seven minutes, and approximately forty-eight seconds ago." He amended, adding, "Although I can't be too accurate."
Téa didn't laugh. The gravity of this situation was beginning to set in. She just smiled, and the room fell into a silence for a few moments, punctuated only by Ryou murmuring something in English in his sleep. The silence was heavy, weighing down on them both, intruding into Téa's thoughts, whispering in her ear, putting pressure on her until she finally managed to ask.
"Yugi…" She said quietly, almost afraid of what she would hear. "So…What happened? To me, I mean. Still all in one piece?" The blanket was pulled right up to her armpits, and she didn't want to check until she had to. She only felt a dull, detached throbbing from somewhere, although she could not pin point where exactly on her body it was. They must be pumping her full of painkillers. Pity they fogged up her brain a little to.
"Téa…" He began reluctantly. "I'm not a doctor… and they won't tell us anything either because we're not related to you." His face showed exactly what he thought of this. "So all I really have to go on is what Ryou told me, and he was seriously flustered, I could hardly make out what he was saying-"
"Yugi, tell me." He hesitated, so she ploughed on. "I'd rather hear it from you first then any impersonal doctor, any day. Otherwise I'll just have to throw this blanket off and see for myself."
"I don't know all the details…" He said, slowly. She almost told him to stop. He didn't want to do this. She didn't want to make him do something he didn't want to.
But she had to know.
"Your leg, Téa." Yugi sighed eventually. "Ryou said…It got your leg."
"Got my…?" Her face furrowed in confusion. What was that supposed to mean? Her leg? What had happened to her leg? Before she could voice any of these aloud, however, a nurse entered, and, seeing she was awake, was respectfully and forcefully asking Yugi to make his leave.
Yugi frowned again. "But…"
"Now, she didn't have to wake up alone, that's all you wanted." The nurse replied. "Come on, now, let the doctors and I see to your friend."
Yugi nodded reluctantly, waking Ryou and promising to come back the next day.
"Don't skip school." Téa instructed, still finding it easier to think about them rather then her own predicament. This didn't seem real somehow… Then she turned to Ryou. "As for you, take the day off if you need to, Ryou. You're still sick, don't forget!" She hugged them both, having a hurried conversation with Ryou first, before they were ushered out by the impatient nurse. What would follow would be one of the worst conversations she'd ever have.
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Yugi and Ryou walked out in silence. In any other situation, they would have been glad of the company- it was by now late at night, and so walking the same way had it's advantages. However, Yugi's thoughts were solely focused on Téa, and who knew what was wrapped up in Ryou's head? You could never quite tell…
As they reached the street where they would go their separate ways, Ryou finally broke the silence.
"I'm sorry I panicked earlier." He said, always quietly. "I just… There was just so much… blood, Yugi. I thought for sure that she'd… And she was lying so still… The car-"
"I know." Yugi replied. "Just… stop. I'll… tell the others tomorrow."
Ryou nodded. "Thank you for coming, though. I was utterly useless on my own."
"Thanks for telling me what happened." Yugi answered, truthfully.
"Goodnight."
"See you."
Ryou turned away, and walked briskly down the street. His thoughts were spinning, and his head pounded more and more with each cycle, as though they were buzzing angrily around, trying to find an exit. His feet led him up to his flat, and, utterly exhausted, he lay down on his bed, too tired to move. And, even though he'd only just been woken up, he fell asleep and did not wake till the following afternoon, although his dreams were stained with red.
Yugi tiredly watched Ryou disappear down the road. He knew Téa would have done. So he waited until his friend got safely into his building before he hurried home himself. He got in, fielded some of grandpa's questions, and then went up to his room. He did not sleep until the first signs of dawn were creeping across his ceiling- turning from black to grey and blue- and when he did, his dreams were filled with her. He saw her dancing one final time, in a spotlight like liquid stars.
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"Thank you." Téa murmured, although the last thing she wanted to do right now was thank anyone. The doctor nodded and left the room, shutting the door quietly behind him. This was the worst part of his job… Giving bad news.
Téa sat up slowly, pulling back the blankets to have another look at her leg. The weight of the situation had finally crashed down on her as whatever they'd given her began to fade. Looking at it, she could hardly believe that the limb was a part of her, connected to her. Sure, things like this happened. They just didn't happen to her…
She blinked, but it was still there. Her leg was a mess. The surgeons had done a great job of patching it up, she was sure, but she knew that under the crisp, white, pure bandages; there was an angry red gash, stitches, brown patches, parts yellow, parts white, pink… Her leg was a pallet of colours. She knew she was lucky not to have lost it completely. She knew she was lucky to be alive. But she didn't feel lucky at all.
The doctor said that it was important that they kept her leg as strong as possible even while she was recovering, or she might lose the ability to walk. She didn't want that. She would always have a limp; that was certain, but how profound it would be could only be seen in time.
And maybe that wouldn't matter so much had it not come with a specific realisation: You could not dance when one of your legs didn't work as it should.
Now sure she was alone, Téa pulled the blanket back again, covering up the hated sight. She lay down, and as she began to realise this was real, and happening to her, she cried. She cried for her leg, and she cried for her dream, and she cried for herself. And even as the black of night gave way into the grey winter dawn, she lay, and still, all she saw was black. All around her, smothering her, clouding her vision. The sadness gave way to hatred. She hadn't felt hatred before, but she recognised it now, burning up inside her; at everyone- the doctors for not being able to fix it, the people who deserved to suffer like this far more then she did, but especially, more then anyone, the people who had been in that car.
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"I'm telling you, I don't like this." Joey said again. He and Tristan were not the most punctual of people, but even they had appeared before any of the others. "Where are they?"
"Ryou was sick…" Tristan began ticking off on his fingers. "And Yugi's late every once in a while…"
Joey snorted. "Yeah, but when has Ryou ever taken the day off of his own accord? The only times I've known him not to come in is when the hospital won't let him out! As for Yug, well, sure, he's been late before; but never this late! Form's almost over already!"
"I guess…"
Right on que, Yugi burst into the room, red in the face from either running to class or embarrassment; or possibly both. "Sorry…I'm… late!" He gasped. Joey and Tristan patiently waited for him to get a good telling off before he reached his seat and they could catapult questions at him.
"I overslept." He informed them. "I was… up late last night, and Grandpa didn't wake me up."
He was avoiding the issue and they all knew it. But he just didn't know how to tell them…
"What are you not telling us?" Joey demanded, not beating about the bush. "Just what happened last night?" He lowered his voice slightly. "You didn't have more trouble with Bakura, did you…?"
"No." Yugi glanced around to ensure no-one was listening in. The hospital would have been in touch with the school already, but it was still a matter for discretion. Téa wouldn't want everyone to know. Besides, he wanted to put off telling them as long as possible. But there was no-one around to hear. The desks surrounding them were all empty. Ryou evidently hadn't made it in as his desk was silent; Téa's still as a held breath. Not even Kaiba, who seemed to think not coming in until the last possible moment was a form of rebellion, had got here yet; and all the others were talking amongst themselves, not seeing anything amiss. He'd have to tell them.
"When Téa was coming out of Ryou's, she…" He took a deep breath. Téa was like a sister to him, not just one of his best friends, and the words broke his heart. "She was knocked down. By a car."
They stared at him.
"Well, is she alright!" Tristan managed to get out eventually.
"She's alive." Yugi answered, looking down miserably at his desk. "But they only let us stay till she woke up- we're not her relations so we didn't get to hear the diagnosis."
They pressed him with questions all that morning, but there were very few he could actually answer. The only things he knew about the accident were from what he could glean from a brief telephone conversation with a sick, panicked Ryou who was only semi-coherent. The total came to a very small amount. So no matter how many times they asked him, he still didn't know the answers.
At lunchtime, Ryou appeared, looking better then he had done for days. It was a small mercy that he had woke up just an hour or two ago from a series of bad dreams to find his fever had gone and taken all but the slightest sniffle with it. Unfortunately, the atmosphere was rather more subdued. It just wasn't the same without Téa, especially given where she was. Still, now that he was calm, it was much easier to tell what had happened.
"It was no-one's fault." Ryou said, firmly. "I saw it all from the window. The car was driving perfectly safely, and she had plenty of time to get across. Only she slipped… I mean, it tried to avoid her, it really did- it almost missed her, it just got one of her legs. It managed to stop from hitting her head on, but he just skidded on the ice to, went off course…" He shook his head, not wanting to recall anything more. "It was awful."
Joey growled in frustration. "It should've happened! Not a good person! It just isn't fair!"
"Bad things happen to undeserving people, Joey." Ryou replied, softly. "That's the way it goes. It's not fair, but it happens. People get hurt… die… for no good reason. Suddenly, because circumstances decide to play silly buggars, you never see someone again. So just be glad she didn't die. She could have done. So be glad."
"I guess…"
Yugi was looking at Ryou strangely, trying to figure something out. He was beginning to realise just how little he knew about Ryou. He knew he lived alone, and was fairly sure a sister had been mentioned, but he really didn't know anything else. No-one had ever asked.
"Ryou…" He said, slowly. He had to ask, but it was so hard to make it tactful. "Your family. Are they…?"
Ryou smiled a small smile, like he wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry. "By Jove, I think he's got it." He commented. "Yes, Yugi. My mom and sister died in a car accident. That's the reason I panicked." He looked down, slightly ashamed. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to… I should have kept a level head, I know. But… I just couldn't bear the thought of it happening all over again."
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They had left the hospital. They had walked as far as they could together. Ryou had barely noticed. His mind was still in that dreadful moment when she'd been hit, and even further back, when he'd been walking home, annoyed that his mom had failed to come and pick him up, and come across the smouldering wreckage of what used to be their car…
"Goodnight." He said, shaking the thoughts away.
"See you."
Ryou turned away, and walked briskly down the street. His thoughts were spinning, and his head pounded more and more with each cycle, as though they were buzzing angrily around, trying to find an exit. His feet led him up to his flat, and, utterly exhausted, he lay down on his bed, too tired to move. And, even though he'd only just been woken up, he fell asleep and did not wake till the following afternoon, although his dreams were stained with red, and were anything but peaceful. Between each one, each more blankly terrifying then the one precluding it, he'd wake- but would be pitched straight into another with barely enough time to register reality. He just saw Téa at first, but then he saw his mom, and Amane, and him, and all the time he was running and running but unable to get away, always to a constant malicious laughter…
He woke suddenly, properly this time, the light streaming brightly through his curtains. He sat up, calming his breathing, pushing the nightmares away as he did every morning, and so saw the clock on the cupboard by his bed. And he sprang up, quickly. He was so late!
Looking down in horror, he saw that he was still in his uniform from the day before. And, judging by the state his bed was in, it was not fit to wear again. Which meant he would have to wash it…
He ran to have a wash, running round in a panic to try and get ready- if he hurried, he could still get to school for afternoon registration. Amongst all the running around, he registered that his fever had gone.
Unfortunately, he still didn't feel much better.
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The first day was the worst. Waking up, not entirely sure where she was, and then remembering. The constant stream of nurses coming in to see if she was alright. The uncertainty, and the boredom. And then the dreaded visit from her friends in the afternoon.
She couldn't stand the pitying looks, the sympathy, when they had no way of possibly understanding, the looks on their faces that let her know her act of being her usual self was failing, failing, not fooling anyone; not even Serenity on that one-day visit…
But she was not her usual self. She wasn't even sure who she was anymore. Her dream had gone. Her motivation. What she'd been aiming at since she was three years old watching episodes of Angelina Ballerina. All those years of work, destroyed in an instant, because she'd slipped on a patch of ice. It hurt. There was pain in her leg, yes, but that was nothing compared to the pain inside. She was given painkillers for her leg. Pity she couldn't get them for inside to.
However, as the days passed, even while Téa's mental state was going downhill, the doctors were pleased with her physical progress. Her leg was strong and toned from years of practise and rigorous training, and it wasn't going down without a fight. It was always going to be a slow healing process, but that strength coupled with Téa's determination to get it as good as she could assured them they would get as close to a full recovery with time as humanely possible. After just a week in hospital, they tried to get her walking again. With the support of the nurse, she was able to stand and take a slow, juddering step. And another. And another.
The following day, she managed four.
By the end of the next week, she could get to the end of the room and back before the protest in her leg forced her to stop. She still couldn't get far unaided, but it was incredible progress. The doctors thought she would be able to get out of here in a month.
But what did that matter to her? She still wouldn't be able to dance. What was she supposed to do with her life now! Did they have a medicine for that, she wondered.
Another day came, and by now she only saw people at set times- when she tried to walk, at meals, and when the physio. person came to see her. There was also a councillor- her friends had told the doctors that something was seriously going amiss in contrast to Téa's naturally optimistic mind- but Téa didn't open up to him. She didn't open up to her friends, and she didn't open up to anyone else. She just kept it inside her. What did they care? It wasn't their problem.
No. She knew that her friends cared. But they didn't understand. They couldn't. So they weren't involved. They had their world, and she had hers.
However, it was on her fifteenth day in hospital that she got a visitor. That morning, Ryou came alone, before school.
"Is something wrong?" She asked.
"Only you." He replied, going over to look out the window. "We're worried about you, Téa."
"Well, my leg's healing better then they expected, so I should be out in another couple of weeks-" She began repeating dully.
"No, that's not it." He turned to face. "It's you, Téa. This has affected more then your leg. You're bitter and angry; you hate the world."
She didn't try to deny it.
"That's not how you used to be, you know." He told her. "You had a temper when you wanted, but you were always positive. You never gave up. On anything, or anyone. Everyone keeps saying you're lucky to be alive, but it almost seems like you died back there."
Téa felt the anger coiling up inside her. "So I'm supposed to be happy that I have no dream anymore!"
"Of course not." Ryou dismissed. "That's not what I'm saying! You're such a strong person, Téa, you can get through this!"
She turned her face away, saying bitterly. "I suppose next you're going to say you understand what I'm going through, like all the others?"
"No." Ryou answered quietly. "I don't understand. How could I, unless I was you? No, I'm not even trying to understand! I just want you to remember how things used to be! How you used to be! You're being sucked into… into this pit of darkness, and, so help us, we're trying to pull you out! But you just refuse! You always spent so much time trying to help us, but now you won't even help yourself. You won't let us help you." He looked at her sadly. "You're being torn apart, but you're not even trying to do anything about it."
"You think this is easy?" Téa hissed back, angry now. "You think this is easy?"
"No." Ryou said, over and over. "No, no, no. It isn't. That much is obvious. It's just… Téa, you've been blessed and you don't know it. You kept your life, but you're just chucking it away. And we can't stand to see that… The others said that if you wanted to talk to us you would, but I had to try. Téa, please, you have to get out of this rut. We don't want to lose you." He looked at her desperately.
"You'll be late for school." Téa answered, not looking at him, her voice shaking in an anger she didn't want to express. "You'd better go."
"Téa…"
"Just go, Ryou!"
"…We'll be here after school." He promised.
"I don't care!"
Ryou felt a wave of anger wash over him. She'd lost something important to her, that had to be hard, but she was alive! Some people didn't have that privilege! And yet, here she was, completely unappreciative of that! "Téa!"
"I thought you were leaving." She snarled.
Ryou reigned in his anger, just about. He knew yelling wouldn't do any good at all. He had to control it, control the rage that was her, really getting to him… "I use Arial. My washing powder is Arial." He left without another word.
Téa stared at a blank bit of wall. Ryou didn't know what he was on about. How was she supposed to be optimistic when she had nothing to aim at, no goal, no dream, no purpose…?
The day had only just begun. And it was going to go from bad to worse.
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That previous Saturday, Serenity's visit had come and gone. It was not nearly as fun as anyone had expected. When the train had pulled up into the station, she had tumbled off it and into her brother's arms. But even after the enthusiastic greeting from Joey and from all her friends who had come to meet her, she realised with disappointment that the one person she really expected to be there was not.
But she saw Téa soon enough, sitting next to her hospital bed. She could hardly believe it was the same person. Téa had always been so strong, so happy… an inspiration to her. And now she just wasn't the same.
Serenity had managed to thank Ryou, but it wasn't how she imagined. Everyone had something bigger on their minds. Then she had to go back home, to an empty house. But it didn't seem any emptier then Téa's eyes, behind the mask she'd tried to put up…
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Téa woke up from her sleep due to a particularly bad twinge in her leg. Yes, she had managed to sleep, again. She thought she had slept as much as physically possible, yet it kept coming. Not much else to do in empty hours.
But this time was different. Some part of her knew Ryou was right. And some part knew that all this anger and hate she was keeping inside was doing her no good. But she couldn't, just couldn't, get past it… Every time she'd tried to think about what new direction to take, she just couldn't face it; couldn't find anything other then dancing. A huge hole had been torn out of her when her dancing dream had been ripped savagely away, and that hole was becoming more and more filled with hatred every day. Some parts of her welcomed the cold burning. The rest was just scared- both of the feeling and her desire for it. The feeling scared her because it was so empty, and she hadn't ever met it before. The part that found the emptiness comforting was growing. She was ready to accept it fully, to. Almost. Only one thing held her back. She knew the driver and passenger had been more badly hurt then she had, just for trying to avoid her. She couldn't quite blame them completely, not till she knew what kind of person they were.
The driver had apparently had one of his ribs pierce his lungs, which didn't sound at all pleasant, and had been taken to a specialist hospital. He was going to make a full recovery; except that his lung wouldn't work quite as well. But the passenger was still here. In the next room.
It wasn't far.
Still further since she'd walked since the accident. Unaided, it might as well be a marathon.
But she was sure going to try.
She struggled on, leaning on walls for support. By the time she got to the door, she was ready to stop- it was harder then she'd expected. Her leg hurt, and if it wasn't for holding on she'd fall over. But if she stopped now, not only would she be a quitter, she'd never know wheatear she should hate that person or not. She had to know. She couldn't just hate someone without meeting them first. She owed that much to her friends. She owed that much to herself.
So she'd go and met them. Make peace with herself. Give them a piece of her mind. And go back to hating in peace. Still, at least no-one could get at her if she could claim she'd tried.
She spurred on.
She did not expect what she found when she pushed the door to the next room open. Her eyes met with another pair, even bluer then her own. She stared dumbly for a moment, because it just couldn't be.
But it was.
Her first impulse was to bolt. But her leg was no longer capable. She certainly couldn't make it back for a while. So she just… stood. Barely. Thank goodness the door frame was there to avoid her embarrassing herself any further. Fortunately, he seemed almost as surprised as she did. Considering the manner of her entrance, it was justifiable. And if he knew why she was there…
"Do you generally lurk in doorways?" He asked, meaning it was his way of telling her to come in. "You always struck me as the type to march in and state your business without invitation."
She went in, slowly and deliberately, not sure wheatear to show her difficulty at this as much as possible or to attempt to hide it away. She managed to make it across the room and sat down, still without saying a word.
She went across the room and sat down, in a chair, intended for the well-wishing visitors of Seto Kaiba.
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She watched him cautiously. He regarded her. Neither intended to speak first. But eventually, they had to break.
"So, it was you who-" Téa began.
"I was wondering-" Seto started at the same time. Both stopped, and looked away.
"You've done it this time." Téa said, her gaze fixed on the floor. "Why did it have to be you, of all people…?"
"Believe me, I wish it wasn't." Seto retorted hotly. "And what do you mean, I've done it this time! If I recall, it was you who slipped! My driver could have died- I could have- trying to avoid you!"
"This is not my fault!"
"Nor is it mine!"
Téa looked anywhere but at him. The room was so bare compared to hers. She had cards from people everywhere. He had just one. Just one, sitting on top of a battered Scrabble box… That was so sad…
"Where were you hurt?" He surprised her by asking.
"In the worst possible place. My leg." She replied, rubbing a hand to her forehead. "I…I wanted to dance." She didn't know why she was telling him this. "But…Now I don't know what I'm going to do."
"Huh." He rolled his eyes. "You'll be fine."
She looked up at him in more surprise. It was then she saw how tired he looked. His right hand was covered in bandages, going as far up his arm as she could see. He'd probably been hurt more then he was letting on.
"Your type always are." He dismissed. "Face it, Gardner. People seem to like you. If you don't succeed in dancing, you'll just do it somewhere else. So why worry?"
He had dismissed her dream just like that! It wasn't that easy to just drop a dream you've had since you were tiny! He couldn't do that!
But he had. And… she supposed he had a point. All that money she'd been saving to go to New York could be put to better use, and she'd have more time now without practise… but…
She didn't reply.
"I suppose your friends will be coming back this afternoon?" He asked, flatly. Téa realised that, if he was so eager for a conversation, that he must be as bored as she was. He tried to remain uninterested, like he didn't care… He didn't seem to feel guilty at all!
Because it wasn't his fault?
"Don't try that 'nice guy' act now!" She yelled at him. "Don't you think it's a little late for that? Need I remind you that your car ran over me!"
He shrugged. "If you feel that way, then get out of here. No-one's asking you to stay, Gardener."
She didn't go, and she wasn't willing to sulk like a petulant child either.
"…Where were you going?"
"What?"
"When it happened! Where were you going?"
His face cleared in realisation. "To the office." He stated, as though it was obvious. "We had set out early because of the snow."
She laughed bitterly. "Why couldn't you have just been late to work for once? Just once?"
This time, he didn't answer.
They sat, sizing each other up again. Téa turned away first, cursing softly, violently.
"…Why couldn't you just let me hate you?" She asked, almost crying. "Why did you have to be blameless? Why couldn't you just let me hate you?"
"I thought you did." He answered in that infuriating smart-aleck way.
She shook her head. "I can't hate you! It wasn't your fault! But…" She took a deep gulping breath. "Hating you would have been so much easier. So much easier…"
He didn't comment. He didn't know what to say to that.
"Is your arm going to be alright?" She asked, tone polite but uncaring.
"It's never going to be the same as it was." He replied in the very same tone. "But I'm gab handed anyway. Still, it's going to make typing a nightmare. Imagine trying to hit 'A' with your left hand…" He mimed one-handed typing in mid-air. Téa found herself laughing for the first time since she'd come here. Just a little, but it was a start.
They fell into another awkward silence.
"That's good." Téa thought about leaving, but she couldn't, not yet. She still couldn't take this…
"Yugi and the others…" She hesitated. "Do they…?"
"Know I'm here?" Seto finished. "I hope not."
"That would be the ultimate humiliation, no doubt." Téa commented. Inside, she was pleased. She knew they wouldn't have kept it from her…
"I'm surprised you're worrying them so much." Kaiba's sharp comment brought her back down to Earth. Téa stood to leave, holding onto the top of the chair, and moving her way along the wall. She wanted to get away, now, now…She didn't want to talk about this…"I see them going past every night. They're worried that you've changed."
"Well, I've had to!" Téa shot back. One step closer to the door. Another.
"They're right." He said, sounding almost amused. "I never thought you'd be the sort to hate the world."
"Things have changed!"
"So have you." He commented. "You don't even care that you're worrying them, do you? You don't give a damn about them- you're thinking selfishly, and I have to say, it's a welcome change to that normal friendship garb you spout. But one thing intrigues me…"
"And what's that?" She reached the door handle.
"Where your family is. Your little groupies are always going past. What about your family?"
"…They're on business. Abroad."
"And they didn't come back?" He sounded genuinely surprised. Then he laughed. "Heh. Guess that's why you pester your friends so much. Your family's no good so your friends are all you've got, right?"
"Shut up." She said. She didn't shout it. She whispered it.
And Seto knew he'd been right.
Oh.
He hadn't meant to be right… He was just teasing her. Trying to get that old spirit of hers out. She wasn't nearly as amusing when she wasn't yelling at him.
"Gardner, I-"
"I may not have a very good family." She said, still almost silent. "But I have great friends. You don't have either."
She left.
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"…Alright." Yugi said, uncertainly. "We'll go…"
Téa said nothing. Didn't look around. Didn't reply. She just wanted to be alone right then.
"We'll come see you tomorrow." He promised.
Still no response. She hadn't even sat up since they'd entered the room. Ryou wasn't with them. He had said, with just the slightest trace of regret, that he didn't think she would want him there, and nothing more. Mysterious, that one…
Giving up, they all said goodbye and left. Téa rolled over and looked at the closed door. She half wanted to shout after them. She did not. Silently, she tried sort her thoughts into some sort of order, tried to figure out why she suddenly wanted to ignore her friends, when they had been so important to her. Tried to figure out what to do next. Tried to figure out why this had happened to her. But it was impossible. Nothing made any sense any more. Not her thoughts, not her emotions, not anything. She was lost. Confused. And she could see no way out. She longed for one thing that made sense. Just one thing. But none came. For more then a fortnight now, she'd been trying to see some sense in this odd world, and there'd only been a single moment of clarity; when she'd realised she couldn't hate Kaiba because it wasn't his fault. And even that was fading. He'd been so horrible, he deserved to be hated… he shouldn't have said that.
Now, she felt angry, but another confusing thing was that she also felt guilty. Slowly, she realised she shouldn't have said that to him. Mocking someone because they were pretty much all alone in the world was a level she never thought she'd sink to. She needed to go and apologise.
That made sense. So she clung onto it, desperately looking for logic, so self-assured. Yes, she had to go and say she was sorry to Kaiba.
How ever much pain it caused her.
But hey, she was used to pain now. At least it was fading a little in her leg…
It took some doing, but, for the second time that day, she made it to his room, this time knocking before she went in. She would just have to open her mouth and-
He was asleep.
She'd struggled to get this far and he was asleep!
"A bit of consideration would be nice…" She muttered, but he didn't stir. She frowned in annoyance as, despite herself, she hobbled further into the hospital room, curious. She had never been able to imagine him sleeping… Leaning on the foot of the bed, she decided to take a peek. To her disappointment, though, it wasn't very interesting. He just looked normal, except lying down, eyes closed, still. Unwilling to attempt to stagger back to her own poky hospital bed so soon, she pulled the notes off the end of the bed and had a nose through. A lot of it meant nothing to her, but the amount of medication listed was astonishing. The amount of injuries was worse. It was a list. A list of what was wrong with him. If she could understand any of this medical jargon, he'd been comatose for the first five days. Now expected to make a full recovery.
Téa shook her head, wryly. It was just like Kaiba to act like nothing was amiss even when he had a list of treatments several pages long. It must have been touch and go for a while, and she felt immense pity for him and for his brother. It must have been so hard for Mokuba… She wondered where he was staying, what he was doing… Looking at the notes just once more, she became certain that she'd understood correctly. That first week had been the worst. But now he was stable and recovering. He was weak, yes, and it looked like he wouldn't be coming out of hospital for quite sometime, but he'd be okay.
And even though she'd come to apologise, and didn't hate him, she still wasn't quite sure if that was a good or bad thing…
One of his feet was sticking out from underneath the blanket. He had big feet. But it must have been cold. She went to pull the cover back over it, then snapped her hand back. What was she thinking! He wasn't one of her close friends! He didn't need her to look after him! So what was she playing at!
She left as quickly as she could.
Seto stirred at the sound of the door shutting, but not enough to register what it was. He dragged his foot back into the bed and went back to sleep, not knowing what he'd missed, not knowing how things could have been different, how if only he'd woken up, he could have changed everything.
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The next day was much the same as all the others. Téa woke, feeling more angry and exhausted and strangely empty then ever before. The relapse she'd had yesterday was over. She had no intention of apologising to Kaiba. First he'd run over her, killing all her dancing dreams, and then not only had he just shrugged it off, he'd been rude to! He deserved everything he'd gotten, and more. She blamed Ryou and his interference for messing with her head yesterday morning. That was all it came down to.
That day, she did nothing. She didn't speak to anyone. She didn't read any of the books or play any of the games the others had brought her. Only when she was trying to walk did she give any kind of response, and, face set in hard, unfeeling determination, she got further then ever. Deciding she was no longer in need of a person to lean on, they gave her a stick. Oh, that stick. It would become her best friend until the end of her life… But, she hated it. She hated needing it. Hated that dependence. Still, walking, for her, was a form of rebellion against her leg. So she used the stick. She would beat her leg. She would.
That day, when her friends came, she decided to change tack slightly. At first, she was just going to ignore them again, but then thought that just pretending to be asleep would be easier. Ryou wasn't with them.
Was he mad at her?
No, she was mad at him! He'd better keep a safe distance!
Her friends had decided to let her sleep and were leaving. Yugi, however, hung back.
"I know you're just pretending, Téa." He whispered. She tried to keep her breathing steady, hoping to throw him off. "They said you haven't spoken all day. Look…I don't know what happened yesterday, but if you don't want to talk to us, I guess that's okay. But we'll still come and see you, everyday. When you're ready to come back, we'll be here." She was still pretending to sleep. He gave up. "Alright… We… miss you, Téa."
Quietly, he left.
Once again, Téa rolled over and stared at the shut door. She could feel her resolve waning again. She realised that she was crying.
Because she missed herself to.
But… this feeling inside her, it was too strong.
She was so far forward, into anger and bitterness and hatred, that she could never go back.
A few minutes later, there came a knock at the door. Probably Yugi again. Or Ryou. Well, she didn't want to see either of them! She didn't want to see anyone!
She heard the door open, but refused to look at it.
"Téa…?"
She sat up at the voice, swinging around in spite of her best intentions. The voice had not been any of the ones she'd been expecting.
"Mokuba? What are you doing here?"
The younger boy fidgeted in the door way. "…Do you mind if I come in?"
Curious as to what he wanted, she shook her head. "No."
He came and took the seat next to her, looking at the floor. He looked worse then his older brother, pale, with red rings round his eyes. Once again, she found herself wondering who was looking after him. Perhaps he was looking after himself.
"How's your leg?" He asked, uncomfortably.
"Wonderful." Téa said, wryly. "But it's been temporarily usurped by a stick." She nodded at the cane in the corner.
"Oh…"
She waited patiently for him to spit out whatever it was he'd come to say.
"Seto said you visited him yesterday."
Téa snorted. "'Visited'? Is that what he called it?"
Mokuba looked confused. "Yes…"
"I see." She laughed bitterly.
"But I just wanted to say…" He hesitated. "I'm really sorry, Téa!"
"Yeah? You and everyone else in this stinking place." She replied, harshly. "Everyone's 'sorry', Mokuba. No-one can do anything about it!"
"I know." Mokuba replied quietly. "I know I can't do anything. I wish I could make it so none of this ever happened, but I can't do anything. I'm sorry."
"Stop apologising." Téa commanded. "The only apology I want to hear is from your brother for what he did and said to me!"
Mokuba looked troubled. "It wasn't his fault!"
"No, but it was his car."
Mokuba stood, looking appalled. For a moment, she was tempted to apologise herself for what she'd said, but she quashed it. She meant what she'd said, every word. If he didn't like the truth, then that was his problem.
"This is freaky." He commented. "It's like you and my brother have switched personalities. Suddenly you're all angry and he's not!" He ran from the room, closing the door loudly behind him.
Téa stared after him, shocked. Is that what she'd become? Was she acting like…Kaiba?
For the first time since the accident, she tried to see herself though someone else's eyes. She was angry, and hating. She was ignoring her friends because they wouldn't understand, but they didn't know that. She'd given them no reason. And taking her anger at someone out on their brother…
She was.
For someone she hated, she was a lot like him.
But… she didn't hate him, not really. She wanted to. But she didn't.
She was so sick of all this… confusion. These mood swings. Not knowing what she felt. It was like someone had blurred her life and emotions and now there was no definition. The guilt at getting angry at Seto came back with a vengeance. And, again, it felt like the clearest thought she'd had. She would go and apologise, and do it now, before it was clouded again. If he was asleep, she'd wake him. She needed to talk to him, now.
The stick made life easier, and she got to the next room far more quickly. She could almost forget about it, were it not for the padded grip in her fingers. But that did not matter. She threw the door open, and marched in.
"Kaiba, I-"
He held up a hand to stop her. He was awake this time, and, to her surprise, Mokuba was still there. She'd assumed his brother had sent him in, and that he'd go home right after. But now it looked like he'd come to see her first. And, from the looks of things, now he and Seto were in the midst of a highly contested game of Scrabble.
"Uh…I…"
"Gardner." He beckoned her to come further in. "Zo?"
"Huh?"
"Zo." He repeated, scowling at her. "You know it?"
"Sure, it's the same as Zho. It's a type of Himalayan castle." She watched in confusion.
"What?" Mokuba groaned. "Ah, man…"
Seto snorted. "Double word score for me, I think."
Mokuba wrote the score down, grumbling, as Seto took another two tiles from the bag.
"What are you complaining about?" Téa asked, able to see his rack from where she stood. "You can totally pawn him this go anyway."
Mokuba scrutinised the rack in confusion. "But I don't see any…"
"But look!" Téa cried, leaning over him and placing the tiles down. "G-L-U-C; then it's the 'O' he played; S-E. Glucose."
"Oh yeah!" Mokuba cried in delight, quickly adding up the score, and using Seto's Double Word Score. "That's…Twenty points! Thanks, Téa!"
She smiled for the first time in days. "You're welcome." She smile changed to a slight grimace as her leg started complaining about how long she'd been standing. It didn't go unnoticed.
"You'd better sit down." The elder Kaiba said, not sounding overly keen on the idea. "Before you fall over and make a mess on the floor." Once upon a time, she would never have agreed with that tone. But man, she needed that chair…
She sat.
To her surprise, a rack was placed in front of her. "You'll play to, right?" Mokuba begged, having obviously forgiven her for earlier. "We've only just started."
"Well…I…"
"Please?"
Darn those puppy-dog eyes.
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To her surprise, that afternoon in that austere hospital room, sitting on an uncomfortable wooden chair and playing a spelling game was one of the most fun couple of hours she'd had in a very long time. Unfortunately, it looked like it was coming to a close. Most of the spaces on the board were full, but she and Mokuba had both silently assessed that Seto was getting tired. It was fairly obvious when the resident genius tried to spell 'theological' with an 'f'.
He still won by over three hundred points.
"I should go…" Téa began. "They'll be bringing the evening meal round soon, and if I'm not in my room, they'll go berserk."
"Fine." Seto said, quickly, with a little more enthusiasm then she'd accept with anyone else. "Bye."
"…I need to go to." Mokuba said, as Téa propped herself up on the stick. He hugged his brother hard. "I'll see you tomorrow, Seto!"
"You take care."
Mokuba headed towards the door, over taking Téa. He hesitated. "You'll come and play again, right? It's better with three…"
"Well…" She glanced up at his older brother to see how he would react. Unfortunately, his face was as inscrutable as always, watching the proceedings with apparent indifference.
"Téa?"
His voice drew her attention back to him. And there they were again. Those darned puppy-eyes.
"I'll…try." She said, carefully.
Seemingly content with that, Mokuba bade them goodbye and left. Téa continued to hobble out.
"What was it you wanted to say?" Kaiba asked.
She closed her eyes. She'd almost been able to forget… Closing her eyes, she turned painfully slowly to face him. "About yesterday…"
"Forget it."
That surprised her. She blinked in confusion. He shrugged.
"If I don't ask you to apologise, you won't demand that I do."
She nodded her acceptance of these terms, dubiously. "Alright."
"You do realise you're going to end up in here tomorrow now." Seto informed her dryly. "Never give my brother any leeway. Now, if you don't come of your own accord, he'll be in there and will force you."
Téa laughed. "Alright." She said again. "Although, I never would have had you down as the Scrabble type."
Kaiba shrugged. "Easier to play on top of a bed then chess." He pointed out. "And I suppose it does relieve the boredom somewhat."
"Too true." Téa agreed. "I get so bored, I really think I'm going crazy."
"Me to."
"Well…bye…"
"Goodbye."
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That day marked a turning point for them both. Some level of understanding had been reached. But, realising she had been acting like a real jerk had really effected Téa, and she was really trying not to be. She was still sore inside, in that spot where her dancing dream had once been, but she tried not to think about it too much. She thanked the hospital staff. She chatted to her friends. She asked them to make sure Ryou came the next time. He did, coming into the room, looking a little fearful.
To his surprise, she heaved herself up, wobbling a little precariously, and hugged him.
"Thank you."
Then she turned to all the others in turn. They were surprised and pleased to see her almost back to normal.
As the days past, she ended up spending a lot of time with Seto. At first, it was just when Mokuba was there. But, gradually, when the boredom set in, she started to pop in, just for the company. He was recovering to- at first, he was still often asleep when she went in, but as time went on, he was awake more and more. Sometimes they just talked. A lot of the time they hardly said a word, just idly playing Scrabble.
As he himself commented, the one thing about hospital was that you got very good at Scrabble. She was getting better at it. He was no longer winning by any more then a hundred, on a good day. She had even won some, catching up to his early lead. Their Best-of-Fifty-One tournament was coming to an end. Having played forty-eight games, it was Twenty-five games to Twenty-Three. They'd played a lot of games. Seto was waking more often, Téa's leg was stronger and she could get to his room more often… and there was nothing else to do around here. As she said, the two bored ones had to stick together.
One day, she was placing the board back in the box, ready for later when Mokuba came, and she finally decided to speak to him more then to announce her score.
"You're a lot more cheerful recently." She commented. "Why is that?"
He shrugged. "I'm not at work? Not at school? Or maybe you just enjoy your life more when you're lucky to be alive. Take your pick."
"I guess you're right…" She said slowly, thoughtfully. "I guess that you should enjoy life more when you're lucky to still be here…"
Seto considered her. He knew that losing her dancing future had hit hard. But he did wonder if she'd pulled herself back up again yet.
"Do you know what you're going to do?" He asked.
She paused, and then nodded. The transformation was quite amazing. From the bitter, twisted person who had burst into his room and yelled at him, angry at the world, two and a half weeks ago; to her normal, logical self. He was glad. She was pretty irritating when all she did was shout. He hadn't really wanted her hanging around, but he had to admit he was desperate. He slept a lot, but that didn't stop the extreme boredom in his waking hours. It was either her or he gnawed off one of his own limbs. Now, the former may be annoying, but the latter was painful. So he'd gone for Téa, despite his better judgement. And Mokuba was right; Scrabble was better with three. But, dare he say it, he was almost enjoying her visits now. It certainly gave relief to the oppressive boredom…
"Yeah, I think so." She said, in response to his question. "I mean, as far as my grades go, I'm a fair all-rounder… so I could always become a Primary School Teacher…"
Seto stayed silent. There was no doubt she'd be good at it. But he just couldn't see her being happy…
She sat back down again, leaning forward as if it was a big secret. "But what I'd really like to do is choreography. I may not to be able to dance anymore, but I can still do that, right? Although, I can still do a mean hand jive…"
He raised an eyebrow. "The hand jive?"
"Yeah!" She demonstrated. "Oh, come on, you must know it! Everyone knows it!" he shook his head. "How about Big fish, little fish, cardboard box?"
He shook his head once again.
"This must be amended!" She said, in mock horror. She grabbed his hands, letting go of them quickly when she realised how that made her feel. He privately wished she hadn't. "Look." She spread her arms out in front of her, palms facing towards each other. "Big fish." She informed him, and then moved her hands closer together. "Little fish." She gestured at him to try. With lack of anything better to do, he joined in, his right hand still a bit stiff and slow. "Great! Now watch it all! Big Fish, Little Fish, Cardboard Box, shoot, shoot, star, star, brush it off, raise the roof!" She smiled at him, lowering her arms. "You see?"
"Not really…"
"Okay, slowly then…" She began to walk him through it again. "Big fish, little fish, cardboard box…"
And so, one February afternoon, sitting in a hospital room, Seto Kaiba learnt to hand jive. Unfortunately, he couldn't quite master those Jazz Hands…Hmm…
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"Seto!" Téa yelled, throwing the door to his room open one morning. "Seto! Guess what! Seto…?"
She couldn't believe it! He was still asleep! Could we say heavy sleeper!
She sighed, unsure wheatear to wake him or not. Knowing how grumpy he could get, she'd better not. But… she was going! Free to go! At last! It wasn't even a struggle getting next door any more!
She had to remind herself that he was still recovering, and that he probably needed to sleep. So she decided to leave a note instead.
Of course, there was not a piece of paper or a pen anywhere in sight.
Momentarily put-off, she glanced around, hoping for one to materialise. They didn't. But she did spy the Scrabble set…
Carefully, she put the board out on the side, tipping the tiles out, and rearranging them till they summed up what she wanted to say, if in a basic form. Then she looked at it carefully, wondering if she should add what she wanted to say so very badly… But no. It was foolish. And it was time to go.
Reluctantly, she left the room. Freedom beckoned! But, in her heart of hearts, she knew that that friendship would be left behind her. They have come together merely out of desperation, and she knew this was the end of it. Outside of that mad house, they were on rival sides. He'd be back at work sooner or later, and she'd go and pick up the pieces of her life, trying to stick them back into some sort of shape, and everything would go back to normal between them. She'd known that all along. Accepted it. She knew that's how it would be.
Still, it was a pity…
She shut the door to his room behind her, and, just a little while later, she walked out of the hospital, leaning on her cane as she made her way carefully back along the familiar streets. She was ready to rejoin the outside world, and she did not look back.
Well, maybe she did once…
Or twice.
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It was an unusual message. He'd laughed when he'd first seen it, spelt out in Scrabble tiles. Then he'd read it and the smile had faded. Ah. She'd had to keep it short with the number of tiles available, and with lack of punctuation, the only clue was when she put it on a separate line. But it got the message across.
GOT OUT TODAY
YOU WERE ASLEEP DIDNT WAKE YOU
THANKS FOR YOUR HELP WITH EVERYTHING
SEE YA OUTSIDE
TEA
He knew he should be pleased that she was 'out'. She could get back to her life, and he wouldn't have her in his hair any more.
But he would miss her, in a strange way. It was going to be a long, boring recovery…
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It was only early-afternoon. As she slowly, carefully, made her way home, determined not to surrender and take the bus, she found herself not thinking about surprising her friends, or having to go back to school and face the reactions- her mind drifted back to that hospital room. They never had finished all fifty-one games. Maybe tomorrow she'd-
No, she wouldn't. They'd had that silent agreement that it was a last resort. They were not friends. They were just reliving each other's boredom- the principal of you-scratch-my-back, I'll-scratch-yours. And now, she was back in the outside world. That was behind her, all over and done with, nothing to scratch. She had to accept that, and try to get back to her usual life. Her new life. Her life outside those walls.
She realised, with a sudden jolt, she'd never even said goodbye.
Still, it was too late now.
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Téa laughed a little under her breath. She had only been gone a few hours, and yet here she was, back again already! But she just couldn't not thank him in person… Not when he'd helped her so much. Somehow, she'd felt he did understand more then her friends, he had let her get on with hating until she realised she didn't want to, and he'd been company… So she went back, her cane clacking on familiar tiled floors, reaching the appropriate room. He looked up in surprise as she entered.
"I thought you'd been discharged!" He said, pointing to the note, still on the Scrabble Board.
"I had." She replied, walking over to that good old board, the spare tiles still poured out on the surface. "But I had to come back."
"Why?"
"I… needed to thank you." She sighed. "You stopped me being bored. But it was more then that, really. It was like the world had gone mad and you were the only thing that had stayed the same. And I once I'd accepted that it wasn't your fault…" She shrugged, not quite sure how to word it, and turned to fiddle with the lettered tiles. "It was like all the anger and hate started ebbing away. And the more I saw you, the more I realised I didn't hate you…"
"You don't?" Seto asked suspiciously. "Even though it was my car that 'ruined your life'?"
"No, I don't." Téa answered. "I like you. And when I didn't hate you, I couldget past it abit more, accept it a bit more...But don't worry.I know that once we get back to school, it'll all be normal between us again, now the need for survival has gone… so I wanted to say thanks. It was… fun."
He nodded, and she shuffled slightly. "Anyway, that's all I wanted to say, and I want to go and surprise the others when they come out of school… It'll take a while to limp down there, so I'd better get going…" She put the tile she was playing with down, and hobbled over to the door.
Seto looked at the board to see what it was she'd been absent mindedly writing. She hadn't been paying attention to it, lost in her thoughts, but it had seemed methodical… he almost chocked. She turned, alarmed at the sound, and saw him playing with the pieces. Her eyes widened in horror. No, no, no… She couldn't have… she couldn't have been arranging the pieces in tune with her thoughts… No, please, no…
But she had.
Her life was over. Again. She was such an irredeemable moron…
He put the board down on the bed so she could see, looking away, extremely embarrassed. And it was no wonder! She couldn't believe she'd been so stupid as to actually write it without noticing! But there it was, in burning letters, as clear to see as her blush, a true testament to her idiocy…
I LOVE YOU
But, to her surprise, there was more. Because, underneath, he'd added:
DONT WORRY
I LOVE YOU TO
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A/N: What can I say? That this one took some doing? My family didn't think I was weird, examining Scrabble tiles and trying to remember the hand jive… (Sweatdrop) I was kinda shooting for showing Téa's confusion and loss here, but I don't think I quite hit it… Hmm… Hope you liked it at least a little… Heh… Anyways, all together now! (Sings 'Happy Birthday dear Willowwind Adurois') It seems strange that I write the saddest thing I've ever attempted in celebration, but… it had a happy ending, if an OOC one! Heh… Happy birthday again:D
