Rose Visits Fairyland
Once upon a time there was a King who was handsome and wise and strong and just about perfect in every way. He was married to a Queen who was even more perfect. This used to infuriate the King, but it did not stop him from loving the Queen more than life itself. Still, he did like to tease her. A king can't be good all the time.
Just like little girls?
Yes, exactly like little girls. Only mummies manage to be good that often. Now, as I was saying, the King and Queen were in love and they had everything they could possibly want. Everything except one thing. The King and Queen wanted a child. They had been married a very long time, and it seemed like everyone they knew had a baby except for them. So they decided they wanted a baby, too. And not long after that, the Queen had a beautiful baby girl, who they named Princess Rose.
Daddy, where do babies come from?
Erm... that's not in the story. See? That page is missing from the book. It's too bad.
So back to the baby girl. The King thought he had never seen such a beautiful baby girl, and everyone who was decent agreed with him. The little princess looked almost exactly like her mother, which accounted for her stunningly beautiful looks. The King was so proud of his daughter that he decided to hold a great feast so that everyone else could see just how special she was. He invited all his subjects and all his nobles and, yes, even all of his family. In fact, in the entire kingdom there was only one person who the King did not invite.
Who was that?
The evil wizard Draco. Draco means dragon in some ancient language -
Latin, Daddy.
Yes, Latin, that's the one. And you know dragons are nasty, dangerous creatures. So it makes sense that a wizard with the name 'Draco' would be evil, right?
Of course.
The King didn't want an evil wizard at his precious princess' feast, so he purposefully snubbed Draco by not sending him an invitation. It always gave the King a gleeful feeling to be spiteful towards the evil wizard. But, unfortunately, Draco - who, I have told you, was a very evil wizard - did not like being snubbed. He began to make plans to ruin the King's feast and to harm his little princess. Well, if Draco had known what was good for him, he would never have made those plans. But evil wizards aren't always the sleekest brooms in the broomshed.
What does that mean, Daddy?
It means that Draco had less intelligence than a flobberworm.
So the King's feast went off beautifully, at least at first. The Queen was there, of course, looking just as beautiful as on the day he married her. More so, even. The King never did get over just how much he loved her. All the King's friends were there, many of whom were very powerful wizards and witches who had all promised to give the princess magical gifts.
For some silly reason, they could only give her one present each. So all of them but one gave her their gifts. One gave her beauty (which was entirely unnecessary), another gave her brains (although Princess Rose was smarter than anyone except her mum), and one gave her grace. I wonder why they even bothered, honestly. Didn't they have eyes? Princess Rose didn't need their gifts. She was perfect the way she was.
But, as I have said, all but one of them had given her their worthless gifts of qualities she already had. And just as the last wizard was going to give his (presumably equally pointless) gift, who do you think came into the palace?
I don't know.
The evil wizard -
No, not Draco!
Yes, Draco. He demanded to know why the King had not invited him to the feast. Well, the King thought it was quite obvious why Draco hadn't been invited. It was because no one wanted him there! This news did not make the evil wizard happy, and so he did the unthinkable. He cursed Princess Rose.
Oh no!
Yes, the b- ... er, bad man cursed her. In front of her father. The curse would cause Princess Rose to grow up only to prick her finger on the spindle of a spinning wheel -
Daddy, what's a spindle of a spinning wheel?
I have no idea. Some Muggle something or other. Anyway, she would prick her finger and die.
... die? Daddy, does Princess Rose die?
Of course not, honey. Do you think her daddy, the King, would have allowed that?
But what can her daddy do?
Well, these witches and wizards at the feast must have all been Squibs, because they could only manage one good spell apiece. But you remember that there was that last wizard who hadn't given his gift to the princess? Well, the wizard obviously wasn't such a good wizard, because he couldn't take away the curse - at least not completely. The best he was able to do was to change the curse so that the Princess would not die, but be put into an enchanted sleep for one hundred years. I don't know why the Queen didn't do anything. She must not have had her wand around, because if the Queen had had her wand I don't think Draco would have made it out of the palace in one piece, and she certainly would have been able to lift the curse. But, seeing as she didn't have her wand, she had to settle for slapping Draco across the face hard enough to send him reeling.
Isn't that a lovely picture? In fact, the King was so impressed that he treasured that memory for the rest of his life.
Now, as I had said, Princess Rose would fall into a deep sleep for one hundred years, but she would not wake up until a prince - a worthy prince, mind you - gave her a kiss. On the cheek. Because, as I have told you before, no self-respecting princess receives a kiss from a boy until she is at least one hundred years old.
Yes, Daddy, I know. Not until I'm a hundred years old.
Good girl. Well, the King was obviously worried, but because he didn't believe in this Divination nonsense, and because he didn't even know what the spindle of a spinning wheel was, he wasn't as worried as he should have been.
Sixteen years passed and Princess Rose grew up to be the most beautiful young lady in the land. She got top marks at Hogwarts, and she was captain of her Quidditch team, and all the boys wanted her to be their girlfriend. But Princess Rose was a true princess, and she wouldn't dream of having a boyfriend. She had never been kissed, because all princesses wait until they're at LEAST-
One hundred years old -
Yes, exactly. Well, Princess Rose was wandering around the castle when she came across a really ugly old lady. I mean, we're talking hag-like ugliness. Really vile. The lady asked if she could show Princess Rose this wonderful new device that has never been seen in the palace before. Rose was very fascinated, because she is a naturally curious princess, and so she reached out her hand to touch this strange contraption.
But - alas! The ugly hag was actually the evil wizard Draco, and the strange new contraption was the spindle of a spinning wheel!
Oh, Daddy! But she doesn't die!
No, her daddy would never let that happen. Princess Rose was perfectly fine; she only fell into an enchanted sleep. But her poor parents were so sad now that their precious princess was going to sleep for the rest of their lives! They were so sad that the Queen - who had found her wand by this point in the story - decided to put everyone in the castle into an enchanted sleep, too, until Princess Rose woke up.
So everyone had sweet dreams for one hundred years while they waited for the prince to come and wake up the sleeping princess. Finally, after one hundred years, a prince was found who was worthy to kiss the princess. He was a handsome, strapping young man. His name was Prince Hugo.
Prince Hugo had journeyed far and wide in search of the fabled sleeping beauty who would only be awakened by the kiss of a worthy prince. But Hugo found that he didn't have romantic feelings towards this princess at all. He rather felt like he was a brother to her, or something.
Oh, Daddy…
So Prince Hugo leaned in and gave Princess Rose a very brotherly kiss on her cheek, and the spell broke. Everyone in the castle woke up. Now that he was no longer worried about his princess, the King decided he would go seek revenge on evil Draco. (In the story Prince Hugo gets to fight the dragon, but I think it's better if her daddy does it, don't you think?)
Daddy, are you changing the story?!
No, no, of course not. The King definitely defeats Draco. I was mistaken before. Yes, the King rides into Draco's lair and duels him for a solid hour. The number of hexes that flew around would make you dizzy. But finally, the King was triumphant, and he brought Draco's head back on a platter to prove to the princess that he was truly dead.
Ewww. That's gross.
Tell me about it. But now that the Princess was safe, the Queen kept coming up with creative ways to express her gratitude to her husband for killing the evil wizard, and Prince Hugo decided to come live in the castle with the Princess as her younger brother. Because even after a princess turns one hundred years old, she should never live with a man who isn't her father or her brother. And as for the King, he was satisfied that his dear Rose would never be harmed by an evil wizard again.
And they all lived happily ever after.
The end?
Yes, the end. Which means it's time for a certain young princess to go to bed.
Can't you read me another story? I'm not sleepy at all.
No, love. Now off to bed before I have to give you a sleeping potion.
Ok.
I love you, Daddy.
I love you, too, Rosie. Goodnight.