En Dehors - Carly Catto
Come on, you have to be better than that Carly, she scolded herself after finishing her ronde de jambe exercise a full 2 seconds behind her classmates. Technique class was not supposed to be this difficult; she could do all of these moves in her sleep. Carly knew why she had lost her focus: a pair of eyes glaring into her back, analyzing her every movement, hiding her laughter at every minor mistake.
Being Vanessa's friend was a roller coaster ride. They always seemed to be butting heads (and it was usually Carly who had to apologize first). Even when Carly tried her best, it felt like she wasn't enough for V. For once though, she wasn't going to cave in and grovel for the sake of saving their already fragile friendship. Since Vanessa had been sidelined with her injury, Carly would feel herself improving. Her teachers had singled her out for her effort. Her classmates asked her for advice after class. Even her grades were a little bit higher. Her competitive edge was sharper than ever... except for today. She longed for the comfort of her old friend.
"Carly, your foot is completely sickled," her teacher reminded her. From the corner of her eye, Carly could see Vanessa silently snickering again.
She has to be playing mind games with me.
Is Vanessa really trying to sike me out? Could she be laughing at something else? What?
Carly spun to the other side of the barre and lifted herself into her relevé. Her foot was already starting to cramp.
Teachers only correct students that they're paying attention to. If I were her, I wouldn't be laughing from the corner.
That... was kind of mean. Carly may not have been on speaking terms with Vanessa right now, but she didn't want to become a stuck up ballerina either. Carly lost her balance and came down ungracefully from her relevé. There was no saving that one. She fidgeted with the straps of her body suit, attempting to calm her sudden nerves and avoid anyone's gaze.
"Okay everyone, 5 minute break." Carly rushed over to her dance bag and began rummaging through it. Maybe there was something at the bottom that would help her regain her focus? A lucky charm? She was completely off her game. She was so caught up in her thoughts that she didn't notice the teacher had followed her to where she was standing.
"Carly, you've been doing so well lately, but you're distracted today." Carly could feel her cheeks flush with red from being called out so blatantly.
"I'm..." she searched for an excuse that wouldn't make her look bad. "I'm just a bit out of it. But I'll be better!" she quickly added. The teacher's expression softened (a little).
"You've gotta push yourself out of this funk. The thing I hate to see most is wasted potential," the teacher eyed her sternly before sauntering off to speak with other students. Carly breathed a sign of relief.
She knew she had to be better. Carly was finally being noticed for her talent, and she wasn't ready to give that up. From now on, she would focus 100% on dance. Keaton was a tough school; she had to be tougher. No more holding back during auditions. No more neglecting her training to talk on the phone or go to the mall. No more stepping aside for the sake of friendship.
No more V.
I don't need her to survive at this school. Sometimes, you just have to leave old things behind, she tried to reassure herself as she watched Vanessa look solemnly at the ballet barre. But it didn't make it any easier.