{ So, like, I've been roleplaying with a friend of mine a storyline with, not one, TWO Ciels~ We're making it work, somehow. This is a one-shot that I did real fast, however, I plan to post a several-chapter long story about this. AU, of course. Reviews are appreciated. }
exspectata ut nostrum somnium terra.
welcome to our dream land.
There is something trickling down my spine each time I touch myself. I can't express it in words, so I refuse to even attempt. Clearly, something is wrong with me. Is it normal for me to shiver whenever my own hands contact supple flesh? My own? It's inhuman, to say the least. Of course, I would never let anyone know of this confusion that threatens to overpower the best half of me. Not even that demon, who seemingly knows everything about me. As if. No creature is capable of fully understanding my every whim and desire; not even that perfected constructed demon who can put the world at my feet, if I so commanded him.
Ciel Phantomhive.
Someone is whispering my name. I can hear it ever so perfectly pronounced; the way it resonates around my body is enough to drive me insane. But, I keep my composure every single time. That is how a Phantomhive is bound to deal with any situation presented to them. Let them whisper my name; let them haunt me. Sooner or later, I will make sure that whoever is pulling a prank on me – obviously far from amusing, at that – will see to their own end in the most atrocious fashion. No one is to mock me any longer. I have full control of the outcomes now, for a supernatural creature has become my pawn no more than three years ago. However. . .
Take me. Take me. Take me.
Would it shut up already! I can't think with that annoying sound echoing around in my surroundings twenty four seven. Am I lacking sleep, yet again? Perhaps if I stop reading this article of the Funtom Company and rest on the spacious bed that daily welcomes me with its warmth and comfortable mattress, I'd be able to get rid of the dreadful sound? Yet, as I lay here in the bed, my head begins to wander and fresh ideals invade my mind like never before. This is enough to cause me a headache! I will not complain aloud, though; that would serve as entertainment for that horrible creature whom is most likely bound to burst into my room if I dare emit a single sound of distress or unpleasantly.
I reach up my face, tapping the black eye patch that securely covers my contract-barren eye and slowly, very slowly, I tug it down as the knot easily becomes undone. There is no one around to question me about the different hue, it is my bedroom, after all. And so, I take the freedom to stand up from the bed's comfort and follow the voice. It is greatly familiar to my ears, I know it. Somewhere… I've heard this melody before. It sounds just like –
A mirror.
This is where I absentmindedly walked to, whilst listening to the haunting call of my name, apparently. I'm aggravated by now, and I am strongly hoping that this is not one of Sebastian's many pranks to amuse himself. I have seen my reflection countless of times, more-so in this very same crystallized object; it is in my room for a reason, or have I been thinking wrong all this time? I highly doubt it. It seems… different. I can't explain this sensation. It's as if I want to touch myself. I desire to come in contact with that reflection as if it was a body of its own. In fact, that is what I did. My hand automatically extended forth and a sole index finger traced down the clear object; in unison, the mocking invert did the same pattern with the opposing palm. Or so it seemed like to the eyes of those who used logic.
You're mine!
Did I fall asleep? I think so… my eyes feel heavy, my head is spinning and my back is upon the cold floor. The last I remember was that mirror; those eyes that seemed to look into my core and very existence. Maybe I was just dreaming about it and everything met its finale.
"Ciel,"
The voice is closer, so near that I could grasp it –
"Ciel. . ."
It repeats several times. I feel a delicate palm touch my cheek, pads of fingertips caressing the pallid features I knew so well I possessed. Other than my mother, no one had ever made me feel so good. It was soothing for some reason I failed to locate.
"Who are you?" I asked softly, yet firmly. Just because I was in a small trance did not mean, by anything, that I was to let this person get to me. Yet, oh, how good did it feel to have those fragile hands roam my body, gently touch each of my clothed and exposed portions of the body. Almost as if the owner of those palms knew my body by heart.
Open your eyes.
Was this person ordering ME around? I wanted to thrash around, to grab whoever's neck and choke them. But, I decided against it. That sound had an angelical tint to it, almost making me feel at ease; peace at last. Not a single thought of revenge or even demons lurked in the confinements of my always busy mind. Honestly, this must be a dream.
Those same fingertips fumbled around my navy outfit, undoing each of the buttons one by one as the fabric slid off my figure and to the side. Strange. I'm letting myself become undressed by whoever else other than my personal butler. I must have lost part of my sanity; I'm aware of this yet allow it? But, ah… my thoughts are traveling far away, and it's a sign of granting permission for this foul scene to continue on.
I crave this.
Why?
Why does my body react to the simple touch?
A low, embarrassing sound slipped past my lips; I found myself moaning in response to the amazing hand traveling to my lower region. It's near my aching need. Since when did I become aroused?
"Stop i-it." I stuttered briefly, but my traitor of a body bucked into the hand that oh, pleased me so much. So good. I instantly forgot about the sounds dancing out of the depths of my throat and to the surrounding area.
A kiss.
That was this person's reply to my request of pausing the ministrations. This was the perfect opportunity for me to decipher the stranger's identity. Slowly, both of my eyes opened. At first, it was blurred and it was difficult for me to realize who exactly was making my body burn in such fashion. At the sight of it, though. . .
"What sort of joke is this!" I was furious! How dare Sebastian do this to me? There, in front of my mismatched orbs was an exact replica of myself; as a girl, the plain image was horrible. Memories immediately clouded my mind, sending disgusting shivers throughout my whole self. My hand was already in the air, ready to strike against this girl – no, whatever this was. It could not be human, right? After all, I am THE Ciel Phantomhive. Not.. this thing. Nonetheless, I could not bring myself to inflict damage upon this figure. Something… something…
"Ciel, won't you love me?"
"…"
What? What did she say? Love is not something I believe in, yet when this.. equal – in appearance – of mine said it so confidently, so invitingly…my heart skipped a few heartbeats and a small voice at the back of my head commanded me to comply. But, wouldn't that mean that I am loving myself? I don't understand this. Not one bit.
She moved closer, the gap between us dying at a fast rate. Inches away was her face from mine, and my hands reluctantly snaked around the petite figure that lowered itself onto my aching need.
Warm.
Tight.
Indescribable.
Biting down my lower lip, I contain a groan of pure ecstasy that desired to slip out. I knew my cheeks were tainted with a pink hue; both from shame and lust.
Lust… yet another sin to add to my collection. What a wonderful thought.
Our hips met with one another, each time she forced herself up and slammed back down forced my hips to buck into the pleasurable sensation; yes, I was moaning out my own name. It felt right, though. This has gone past vulgar; it's too much of a horrible adjective to use on a prestigious person such as myself. An Earl! It had no importance now; I want this.
My body trembles. I try my best to hold whatever was to come in for this to last much longer. But, the moment I glanced up at her face… those long 'piggy tails' swaying with each movement; sweat trickling down her wonderful figure… I was not successful.
Pants joined the calm demeanor of the bedroom, making my words stay trapped in the back of my throat. I can't recall when, but she lifted her night gown (yes, for some reason. . . she did not carry that horrendous pink dress, but a night gown), white substance sliding down her thighs – No. HIS thighs. HIS!
"Wh-What the.."
"Ciel, I may not visit you anymore. . ."
A boy! I.. He.. Us.. Ugh!
"You see, I'm on a time restriction. . ."
Does this make me.. what was the word? Homosexual? No, no, no. Just, no.
"I have to go back. . ."
I lay frozen in place, inwardly panicking at the results of this; how could I let myself be dragged away in the midst of pleasure by no other than a boy? I could kill this bastard for bringing shame into my life. Unbelievable.
"But, I will always watch you. . ."
"What?"
No, I was not paying attention to him. Which only resulted in the boy sighing and repeating what he'd previously worded out to me. I felt a sense of sadness all of a sudden. Was I not regretting this scenario moments ago? But now, I did not care; I wanted his company longer.
"At least.. tell me who you are."
I say softly, very unlike me. The curiosity was eating away at my composed persona, even more when I noticed the way he tugged at his hair, the fake long extensions falling off.
"I'm you."
Naturally. I could not deny that I was shocked, but it seemed utterly real to me. He WAS me; my exact self. Just when and how did this happen? So many questions circled my mind, no answers were appearing, sadly enough. I hear him chuckle and throw a soft glare, his hand pinching my cheeks softly and made me realize that my expression had been holding a frown.
Sad.
So horribly sad.
"I must go, but… I will be back, someday."
No.
Don't leave me.
That demon isn't the same as you.
I want to be with you again.
Please –
"T'ch, you better keep to your word, Ciel." Was all that escaped my mouth, regardless of the various sentences forming in my throat. My pride wouldn't allow me to say it to him directly; much less when I was in a somewhat trance, still. However, I was looking forward to our meeting. More than my very own revenge.
welcome back from dream land.
"Bocchan?"
Ah, the demonic sound of his voice waking me up. I opened my eyes and recognize the warm surface of my bed, my body wrapped in the lovely sheets. Sebastian is staring at me with.. curiosity? No, that look is one filled with concern.
"Bocchan, last night, I found you undressed on the floor – "
"Save it."
He didn't need to know the details. Although he seemed as though he wanted to know the information, I refused to say anything. I was so happy all of a sudden. It hadn't been a dream! Real. Real. Real.
After the servant abandoned the room, leaving me to my thoughts once more. Immediately, I roll onto my side and eventually off the bed. My instincts led me back to in front of that same mirror. Nostalgic, that was exactly how I felt from just looking at me in there.
"You promised."
I said aloud, touching the surface of the Victorian mirror gently.
I could have sworn that my reflection smiled at me.
It filled my heart with contentment and excitement.
I was too happy that I was afraid I'd explode.
And, no matter how strange it might have sounded to anyone else, I spoke up.
"I'll wait for you."
C i e l.
I will revisit dream land with you.