Author's Note:
Yet another amazing adventure! You're awesome reviews are apparently going to go a long way. Here you go, from the most rainbow-colored random parts of my brain!
It was Friday. Friday meant that a bunch of potatoes would die... it also meant that Ocelott was legally allowed by the law to stay up late... by the law.
So Ocelott was going to have a big party to celebrate her freedom... granted by law.
It all started on Friday morning, in Ivor's basement where Ivor based his mints...? That can't be right!
Once again, I was beginning to experience writer's block. Something had to be done!
Ocelott was asleep in Ivor's basement. There was also a large hole in the wall where Ocelott had dug her way in. Ivor came down the stairs with a bucket of laundry, but he dropped the entire heap at the sight of Ocelott asleep in his basement.
"What are you doing in my house?!" He exclaimed, waking the cat-girl up with a 'meow'. She sat up, rubbed her eyes like a three-year-old child, and turned to face him with confused eyes.
"I was sleeping." She replied.
"Well, why couldn't you have slept with your two friends ItsLonelyCookie and CartoonWhistler?" He asked annoyedly.
"It's Itscartooncookie and LonelyWhistler, and I couldn't sleep with them because I had to come here to celebrate the Fridays." She explained, hoping that he would understand the fact that Fridays were very, very important to Ocelott. It was the one day she was allowed to stay up as late as she wanted. Ivor sighed, rubbing his head in dismay. He picked up his laundry and walked to the washing machine. When he opened it, he saw Magnus fast asleep, curled up in the fetal position and smilng like a happy baby. Ivor screamed like a girl. Then Magnus screamed like a girl. Then Ellegaard rushed down the stairs screaming like a girl. Then the floor started screaming like a girl. Pretty soon, all of Minecraftia was screaming like a girl, mobs and blocks included. Then the MOON started screaming like a girl! Then, the SUN started... projectile puking. The projectile puke, being molten Sun and all, burned into Minecraftia and everyone died. Except for Reuben. He's gonna live forever.
Everyone respawned.
Ocelott respawned in her bed which was in between Itscartooncookie's and LonelyWhistler's bed.
"Oh, Ocelott. You're back." Itscartooncookie told her. Ocelott smiled.
"Tonight's gonna be special! I'm gonna throw a party to celebrate!" She shouted happily.
Ocelott went to the store to buy everything she needed. When she was at the store, she found Lukas and the Ocelots. She ran up to them and knocked Lukas over because she was too happy to do otherwise.
"What was that for?!" Lukas asked as he stood up wearily.
"I'm havin' a barthday!" She shouted before pushing him back to the floor like it was Skate 3. Aiden whipped out a skateboard and was about to knock Ocelott out with it, but then Ocelott tazed him. After a few minutes, a fat dude with a cup of coffee walked by and Gill whacked him with a skateboard. The fat dude got back up and charged Gill. Gill fell over in slow-motion and died. That's Skate 3 for ye!
After a few minutes, Gill rushed back into the stoor, having had respawned at his house. Aiden, still twitching from the electric shock, wobbled to his feet. Maya stared idly.
"Who wants ta come ta ma barthday partay?!" Ocelott shouted, sounding overly excited.
"Me!" The fat dude shouted. Ocelott promptly tazed him and he too died.
"Let's get groceries!" Ocelott shouted before running off into the store, leaving the stunned Ocelots behind. After a few seconds of running, she grabbed a shopping cart and started running through the store before her cart collided with someone else's. She slowly looked up, shocked to see Axel in the car-seat with Jesse pushing the cart. Jesse awkwardly backed away while Ocelott stared.
"Oh, ok pigmen!" She shouted happily before continuing on her shopping spree. She continued to recklessly run through the store pushing the cart before she rammed into an old lady's cart.
"Crazy teenagers!" The old woman shouted as she was tossed across the room by the force of the minecart. Ocelott only stared back in shock as the frail old lady hit the ground with a crack-splat, but that didn't bother Ocelott at all! In fact, she flattened the old lady with her cart as she rushed by.
She ran through the aisles, grabbing random things as she went, before she rushed into the Redstone and Electronics section of the store. She saw someone. And by 'saw' I mean 'hit'. And by 'someone' I mean 'Olivia'.
"Olivia!" Ocelott marveled happily at the collapsed redstone-engineer who hadn't budged. She had hit her pretty hard, actually. "Uhh... so, how's your day been?"
"..."
"Neato!"
"..."
"You wanna ride in my shopping cart?" Ocelott asked. Olivia moaned, stirring a bit, a motion which Ocelott accepted as 'full steam ahead'! "Yipee!" Ocelott grabbed Olivia and, with surprising car, seated the redstone-engineer in the baby-seat and rushed off. Her words as she ran?
"Yayy! Olivia!"
After Ocelott left the aisle, Jesse and Axel arrived.
"Hey, Olivia, are you finished yet?" Jesse asked. He stopped, seeing that Olivia wasn't there. Axel turned around, seeing that his best friend was missing.
"MY ONE TRUE LOVER! NOOO! This must be Aiden's fault."
"Okay, first of all," Jesse made a loud gagging noise, "Secondly, how is it that everything bad that happens to us is Aiden's fault?" Axel took a moment to think.
"'Dem Ocelots!" He replied.
"Good point. Gogogo!" Jesse's legs made circles and he ran like Sonic the Hedgehog as he pushed Axel and the two boys went to find Aiden.
Ocelott was running when Olivia woke up, or... sorta woke up... if you count being drowsy and 99% not awake and the other one wondering what the heck happened. "Axel, sweetie is that you?" She moaned drowsily, obviously stuck in the gap of subconsciousness.
"Wha?" Ocelott was entirely unsure of what to expect. Olivia smiled.
"I thought I told you to come back at five, not five thirty. I was so worried."
"Uh, Olivia?!" Ocelott shouted.
"You know I had some... things... planned for tonight, hon." At that point, Ocelott rammed into an equally fast shopping-cart. Olivia flew out the seat, coincidentally landing on a well-placed sofa display. Ocelott laughed loudly at this before she noticed whom she had bumped into. It was the Death-Bowl announcer.
"Heellloooo, peeerssoonn! Wwwhhyyy diiid youuuu buuump intooo meeee?!" He yelled as if he was announcing another round of the Death-Bowl. Ocelott looked at his shopping cart:
Cookies
Gunpowder
500 Caliber gun
Adult diapers
"Uhhh... why'd you buy all that stuff?"
"Whhhyyyy aaaare yoooouuu buuuuyiiiing a giiiiiiiirl?!" He shouted at Ocelott, who looked around.
"Good point." She looked down at his cart again, not previously noticing that Magnus was in the baby-seat. Magnus turned around to face her. He had a doggone pacifier in his mouth, which he promptly took out at Ocelott's confused gaze.
"What?! It's a thing now!"
"Leeeeeet's goooooooo!" The Death-Bowl Announcer yelled offendedly. As he pushed Magnus away, Magnus made an immature raspberry at Ocelott. Ocelott walked over to where Olivia was. She was laying dazedly on the couch.
"What happened?" She asked Ocelott. "Why does my head hurt? What are you doing?" She asked as Ocelott picked Olivia up and placed her gently in the seat of the cart. Ocelott whipped out a pacifier and pushed it into Olivia's mouth.
"No talking, baby." Ocelott told Olivia before strolling off. After Ocelott bought a lot more things, she walked to the cashier to buy. The cashier told Ocelott that the total price was 12,000, not including cash. Not sure where she was going to get that cash, Ocelott did the unthinkable.
"How much is this gonna cost me?" Ocelott asked.
"12,000." The cashier replied with a dead face. Ocelott started digging around in Olivia's pockets to which Olivia attempted to protest. "No talking, baby." Ocelott reminded Olivia. Ocelott grabbed Olivia's wallet, flipping through the coins, dollars, credit-cards and pictures of Axel, but only managed to pull out 45K. Ocelott, being good with math, decided to calculate the situation.
The cashier asked for 12,000 dollars.
If you do not have 12,000 dollars, you do not have enough.
You have 45,000 dollars. 45,000 is not 12,000. You do not have 12,000 dollars. Therefore, you do not have enough money.
"Dangit!" Ocelott facepalmed before throwing Olivia's wallet into the trash. Ocelott felt around in her pockets before pulling out a tazer. Olivia flinched. Everyone flinched. Magnus flinched, he and the Death-Bowl announcer were paying at the cashier next to them. A toilet flinched, with a deflatable replica. Then, Ocelott started speaking in rhyme. EVERYONE started speaking in rhyme! "I don't have the money! Don't laugh! It's not funny."
"Put the tazer down! You'll be banned from the town!" Olivia pleaded.
"Give me the groceries, and I'll go away. But if you call the cops, I'll come back to play." Ocelott brooded, her face going from her usually dark tone to a ghostly pale.
"Man this is dark for such a girl. Usually, she's annoying and makes my head whirl." Magnus noted.
"Iiii thiiiiiink weeeeee shoooouuuuld beeeee gooooiiiiiiing, befoooore this giiiiiirl gets blooooooooowing."
"I speak in iambic pentimeter, someone help me stop speaking in iambic pentimeter." Aiden told them all, before Axel and Jesse rounded the corner riding a Nyan Cat shopping carrt.
"CAN'T RHYME TWO WORDS, AIDEN! NOW YOU GET READY TA BE PAYIN'!" Axel shouted before painting Aiden with a 35 caliber gun. Aiden promptly... ate a banana! And then he died. That banana was tasty, while it lasted anyways. Lukas screamed like a girl and ripped out all of his blonde hair. Then, he stripped down to his undies and ran around.
"MY HEAD'S ABLAZE! MY HEAD'S ABLAZE!" He screamed. At that point, everyone stopped speaking in rhyme and stared at Lukas as he went Mr. Crazy Pants. "TASTY, CREAMY, CRUNCHY!" He shouted before jumping onto the floor and exploding. Feeling a bit emotional, Magnus started clapping passionately. After Magnus started to wonder wether or not this crackfics low boundaries would allow him to sprout a head of hair, Ocelott tazed the cashier who was already so lifeless that it didn't matter, then she knocked Jesse to the floor and stole his Nyan Cart stroller, Axel still being in it.
"WAHOOOO!" Ocelott screamed as she and Axel shot down the street. Axel still had his gun with him and, for the mood of the moment, started firing at random while Ocelott started spewing paper money. In other words, they looked totally kick-butt rainbow-style!
Ocelott heard sirens behind her, and looked and saw that she was being chased by policemen.
"Shoot! It's the fuzz!" She shouted.
"Shoot? Alright!" Axel shoot a bullet right at Ocelott, which reflected and would've stormed through his heart had it not reflected off of one of his buttons. Ultimately, the bullet hit the fate dude from earlier. Hehe.
Suddenly, Ocelott had a revelation!
"Axel! You're lucky!" She shouted.
"I am?... hey! I am!" Just as the words left his mouth, Axel got tazed. Consequently, Ocelott was also tazed. By the fuzz.
The police-officers stuffed Ocelott and Axel into a post-office box and the two were mailed to Alcatraz for five years. Ocelott never got her happy Friday barthday, and after hearing that Ocelott and Axel would be together in the same room for five long years, Olivia went Yandere and swore to Notch that Ocelott was going to get it big time!
So Olivia went to Alcatraz and put an end to every female who seemed a suspect. Axel, being a griefer, fully enjoyed Olivia's new sense of Yandere and turned to Yanderism himself. And the two walked into the sunset with sharp weapons in psychotic smiles.
Ocelott respawned on Saturday. She didn't have another late-night again.
Reuben lived forever.
THU END!
Author's Note:
Hope y'all enjoyed! Leave reviews if you want to see the actual party taking place, and thanks for reading!