Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing or any of the G-boys. I do however, own each of their dirty little secrets. Please review for requests to use/mention them in your story. Aww, now I'm just flattering myself, like any one would want to use my cruddy ideas.

Info: Okay, all the G-boys live in one of Quatre's huge houses. Why? Because it makes my life easier. Each of them have a secret and each of them find them out in turn. Each will probably also have a punishment of some kind that will be carried out as a background thing in the other chapters. Enjoy my sad attempt at humor!

Wufei sat with his ear on the door. Satisfied that no one was awake he silently opened his door. Glancing around he swiftly trekked down the stairs. Checking once more that he was all alone as he entered the living room, he sat down. In the darkness he felt around for the remote on the couch, finding it he flipped on the TV. That night's new blared loudly and Wufei frantically turned the volume down to a barely audible glimmer. Smirking he switched it to his favorite channel.

Duo heard a sudden noise and groggily became conscious. He wearily opened his eyes and rubbed them. Figuring the noise was Heero screwing around on his computer or some other random person who was inconsiderate of the need of sleep to his fellow pilots. Sitting up slowly he looked around his darkened room. The window was the only source of light and it barely provided a blue tinge to the otherwise pitch black room. He felt his stomach grumble and grinned. Maybe it's time for a midnight snack, he thought yawning. Scratching his lower back he got up and opened the door to his bed room. Stepping out into the hall without bothering to be quiet he shut his door again. Clomping down the stairs he hummed bits and pieces of a random song.

Wufei froze hearing the noise. Oh no! He thought, Someone's coming! He quickly shut the TV off and cringed as it complied noisily. The hummer didn't seem to notice and continued walking down the stairs. He hoped fervently that whoever came down the steps wouldn't see him.

Duo thought he heard the slight static sound of electronics but ignored it. He marched straight past the living room and into the kitchen. Opening the fridge with the slight sliding sound of the items on the door, he spotted a piece of chocolate cake and pulled it out immediately. Gleefully he closed the fridge and got out a fork from the cabinet drawer. Sitting down at the table he proceeded to stuff his face with cake.

Wufei sat silently and glared at the clock as if hoping to intimidate it into stopping. Damnit! He thought, I'm missing the best part of my show! Grumbling inaudibly he risked changing positions; whoever was in the kitchen was scarfing down something much too noisily for him to be heard. Finally Duo decided he was full and started heading up the stairs. Wufei turned the TV back on almost immediately. Duo, unfortunately for Wufei, heard it. Duo slowly came back down the stairs. What he heard was:

First a female's voice: "Roderick! Don't leave me Roderick!"

Then a male's: "I have to Cynthia; I'm in love with Trista."

Then Wufei's: "No! Roderick, Cynthia is better then that slimy whore Trista!"

"Wufei?" Duo asked with a raised eyebrow as he came around the corner into the living room. Hurriedly, Wufei shut the TV off and whipped around.

"Um, hi Maxwell," he stuttered, "Why are you up so late?"

Duo ignored him,

"What were you watching?"

"TV," Wufei started sweating, "So were you hungry when you woke up?"

"I bet I know what you were watching," Duo grinned snatching the remote away from Wufei. Wufei jumped in front of the TV just as Duo turned it on. Annoyed, he struggled with Wufei.

"Go back upstairs Maxwell!" Wufei shouted as he shot a kick towards Duo's head.

"Watch where you aim that!" Duo replied finally throwing Wufei out of the way. Wufei sat with his head in his hands as Duo's grin broadened, "I knew it! You ARE watching a soap opera!"

"SO?" Wufei replied indignantly.

"So I thought you hated girly crap like this?" Duo smirked muting the TV.

"It's not girly!" Wufei resounded rather childishly, "It's very interesting watching other people's tangled love lives."

"What's interesting to watch?" Quatre's voice sounded from the top of the steps.

"Nothing!" Wufei yelled up to him, "Just go back to sleep!"

From the top of the stairs Quatre rolled his eyes. It was best to let them do whatever they wanted to.

"Whatever you say. I'm going back to bed," he then turned muttering and slipped quietly back into his room.

Wufei turned and looked Duo straight in the eyes,

"What do you want?'

"Oh, not much," he said the gleam in his eyes suggesting otherwise, "Just the satisfaction of watching you squirm every time I let out and hints; and I get to braid your hair."

"What!" Wufei stared at him incredulously.

"You have to wear it in a braid for a month and go out in public or I tell everyone in this house your dirty little secret," Duo relished the power.

After thinking for a minute Wufei finally replied:

"Fine."

"And one more thing."

"What?" Wufei asked through gritted teeth.

"Please don't talk to the TV when I'm within earshot."

SLF: Whew! That felt good. My first new story in a long time. It might not have been very funny, but I hope it brightened a few of your days. This is the first in a set of five short stories revolving around each of the Gundam Boy's secrets, hence the name. I already have ideas planned, but feel free to suggest any. If they're better then mine (which they probably are) I'll use them! Anywhoo, catch you later!