Just a funky little AnsemxSephiroth oneshot involving the cat form of my author character, who incidentally isn't really this cheerful. Rawr. Before anyone tells me, they're OOC, even my author character. So sue me. XD On second thought, don't bother. The most you'd get is some stale pocky and some plushies. Like, a Kirara, a Mokona, a Hiei, and maybe a Sesshomaru. NO ONE gets my Tonberry plushie! He's mine! MINE! (Growls loudly while hugging Tonberry)
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"Meow!"
Ansem awoke with a start. He looked around, and went back to sleep, snuggling closer to Sephiroth, who lay beside him.
"Meow!"
Ansem's eyes snapped open. He sat up, and stared around the room. Still no sign of whatever was meowing. He lay back down, casting one last glance around the room.
"Meow!"
Ansem sat bolt upright. That's it! He stood, and crossed to the bedroom door.
"Where are you going?" Sephiroth asked sleepily.
"Can't you hear that?" Ansem replied, hand on the door.
"Hear what?"
"Meow!"
"THAT!"
"Now that you mention it.…" Sephiroth sat up, and looked around. "I did hear something…"
The two headed into the main room, still trying to figure out what was meowing. It meowed again at least twice, and stopped.
"It's like a damn cricket," Ansem grumbled. Sephiroth latched onto his arm, hanging off him.
"Can we find this thing and go back to bed?" he asked, stifling a yawn. "I'm tired."
"Well, neither of us are going to get any sleep unless we figure out what's meowing," Ansem said, rubbing the top of Sephiroth's head. Sephiroth peered under the sofa, and Ansem looked behind the shelves. Still nothing.
"Meow!"
"Whatever that thing is, I'm going to wring its filthy neck!" Sephiroth snarled, thinking longingly of the bed as he stood up, narrowly avoiding a nearby table.
"Oh, for the love of… I found it!" Sephiroth turned, and saw Ansem crouching behind the sofa.
"What is it?" he asked, trying to peer over Ansem's shoulder.
"I think it's a kitten," Ansem said, stretching his hand out. He gave a cry. "That little shit! It scratched me!"
"You have to be gentle with cats," Sephiroth said. "Here, move aside." Ansem stood with his arms crossed while Sephiroth slowly reached out to the kitten, if that was what it really was.
"Since when did you get to be a cat expert?" Ansem groused as Sephiroth slowly backed up.
"It's so cute!" Sephiroth cried.
"Here, let me see," Ansem said. Sephiroth turned, and Ansem saw that he was holding a small black kitten with feathery silver wings. It had a splash of white across its front and pure white socks on its front paws, making it look like it was wearing a tux and white gloves. It had large yellow eyes, and stared up at Ansem. "It is kind of cute."
The kitten meowed plaintively at them.
"Can we keep it?" Sephiroth asked. Ansem made a face. Cats were expensive, and they had a tendency to get fleas. "Please?" Sephiroth begged.
"You don't even know what sex it is," Ansem said, weakening somewhat.
"How do you tell?"
The two looked at each other.
"Let's call it Kuro-chan!" Sephiroth said excitedly. He started spinning around the room holding the kitten high. "Kuro-chan, Kuro-chan, Kuro-chan!"
"Now hold on a moment!" Ansem said. "It's not even really a cat! For crying out loud, it has wings!"
"Kuro-chan!" Sephiroth cried, holding the cat up in Ansem's face. Ansem sighed.
"Fine. You can keep it," he conceded. Sephiroth cheered, and spun around some more.
"Nighty-night, Kuro-chan!" Sephiroth said gleefully, setting the kitten down on the sofa. He skipped back to the bedroom, cuddling up to Ansem as soon as he could. "Love you, Ansem!"
Ansem smiled as he wrapped his arms around his overjoyed lover. "Love you too, Sephiroth."
-
The next day, Sephiroth sprang out of bed, followed by Ansem. The moment the sofa came into view, he stopped dead. Ansem, who hadn't been paying attention, bumped into him.
"What?" he asked. Sephiroth pointed to the sofa. Ansem looked, and saw what had Sephiroth freaked out.
A girl was sleeping on the couch, right where Sephiroth had left Kuro-chan. Her silver hair fluttered as she breathed, and a long black tail twitched occasionally as she slept. A pair of silver wings with curious black stripes across the top was folded neatly over her back, and a pair of black cat ears poked out of her short silver hair. She wore a hooded black shirt and black pants, as well as black gloves. She was barefoot.
"Who the hell are you?" Sephiroth cried loudly. The girl yelped and fell off the sofa. She stood, and checked her wings to make sure they were undamaged.
"I'm Tetsuya Kitase, mate!" she said. Ansem noted the fact that her eyes were two different colours, gray-blue and yellow, and the pupils were shaped like small circles with two pointed branches each swirling outwards. When folded, the stripes across her wings made it look like her wings were bound with black ribbons.
"Where's the cat?" Sephiroth snapped.
"The cat?" Tetsuya looked puzzled for a moment. Then a look of recognition crossed her face. "Oh! I'm the cat."
Sephiroth blinked. Ansem watched him.
You can almost hear the sound of gears turning, he thought.
Sephiroth's thought processesProcessing information….
Kuro-chan equals cute kitten. Girl equals weird. But girl equals Kuro-chan? So then Kuro-chan equals weird girl? But then…
Syntax error. Please try again.
"There appears to be smoke coming out of his ears. Should we be concerned?" Tetsuya asked Ansem, pointing to Sephiroth.
"You get used to it," Ansem said, sighing.
"Wait a minute!" Sephiroth cried. "If you're Kuro-chan, then you got in our house! And if you're Kuro-chan, then I… AAGH!"
"He seems to be suffering a meltdown," Tetsuya mused. "Does this happen often?"
"Yep."
"Right!" Sephiroth pointed dramatically at Tetsuya, whose ears went back. "Prove you're Kuro-chan!"
Tetsuya blinked, and looked at Ansem, who shrugged. She rustled her wings, and with a loud crack and flash of light (as well as some sulfurous smelling smoke), disappeared. In her place was a strangely familiar kitten. Sephiroth's eyes seemed to bug out of his head.
"Nooo!" he yelled. "This can't be true!"
Ansem shook his head, and lifted the kitten by the scruff of its neck. It squeaked loudly at him, and in a flash Sephiroth had taken it from him.
"Don't hold cats like that!" he reprimanded, holding the kitten close. Then he seemed to realize what he was doing, and quickly dropped it. The kitten turned back into Tetsuya, who was rubbing the back of her neck.
"Yeah, you might want to listen to him this time. That hurts like hell," she said. She turned to Sephiroth. "Now do you believe me?"
Sephiroth appeared to be fighting some great inner battle; then he grudgingly nodded.
"Right!" Tetsuya said, clapping her gloved hands together. "Are you still gonna let me stay? 'Cause my friend kinda kicked me out…"
Sephiroth looked cross, then brightened.
"Only if you stay in kitten form!" he said, smiling evilly. Tetsuya's left ear flopped down comically.
"Do I have to?" she groaned. "It's kinda difficult living at less than a tenth of your real size."
For an answer, Sephiroth walked over to the door and placed his hand on the knob meaningfully. Ansem shook his head as Tetsuya made a face. She transformed back into the cat, and yowled something angry sounding at Sephiroth.
And thus it was that Tetsuya Kitase got stuck as a winged kitten that vaguely resembled a Heartless for the purposes of this fic, and ended up living with Ansem and Sephiroth. It wasn't long before she stopped regretting giving in to Sephiroth, because she never would have been able to see some of the things she saw eventually if she hadn't.
For you see, Sephiroth and Ansem had forgotten she wasn't really a cat.
And I'll let you all wonder that one for now.
-Owari-