Cold but Warm Memories
DISCLAIMER: All that you recognize belongs to JAG, Bellasario, and CBS.
AN: I hope you enjoy!
It was snowing heavily outside and Sarah MacKenzie was freezing. The power in her apartment had gone out, there were no lights, no water, and no heat. She was sitting on her couch, dressed in as many layers as she could and wrapped up in as many blankets as she could find. It was one of the biggest storms of the year, the newscasters were saying. Her empty mug, once filled with hot chocolate, now sat on the edge of her coffee table.
She had been sitting there for quite some time now, thinking. Her conclusion was that life was just funny sometimes. Past conversations had been running through her mind.
Uncle Matt: Where did you find this sailor, Sarah?
Mac: In a rose Garden, Uncle Matt.
Harm: Come on, let's go.
Mac: I can't, I'm sorry, I can't.
Harm: What do you mean, you can't? You're a Marine. Come on Mac. What happened to that gung ho, semper fi, kickass jarhead I used to know? Don't let me down now, Mac. We've made it this far. Damn it. This is precisely why we shouldn't allow women in combat 'cause when it comes to the clinch you know they're going to fall apart. If you were a real Marine...
Mac: All right, all ready. Shut up. You've made your point.
Mac: Harm, I know this is like dancing with your sister, but maybe you could pretend to like it.
Harm: Mac, I don't think of you as my sister.
Mac: You don't?
Harm: No, I don't.
Mac: Harm?
Harm: Very nice, Major.
Mac: You too. I was always a sucker for dress whites.
Harm: Well, you know what they say about dress whites and gold wings?
Mac: Are you afraid you're going to lose me?
Harm: I'm getting tired of breaking in new partners.
Reporter: Who are you two?
Mac: Batman and Robin.
Harm: Hey, I'm Batman!
Mac: Thanks... for believing in me.
Harm: I've got to admit, you had me going for a little while.
Mac: Yeah, but you stayed with me
Harm: All right ladies, let's go. I've got a bird to fly.
Mac: Is he always this cocky?
Keeter: Only around women.
Harm: Take care, Marine.
Mac: You too, Sailor.
Harm: Are you okay?
Mac: I don't know. Things have been pretty messed up lately and with my Article 32 hearing coming up it's only going to get worse in the new year.
Harm: You're going to make it. You are a lean, mean, fighting Marine, and you have me backing you up what could be better?
Chloe: Commander Rabb, Mac's told me all about you, in fact you're all she talks about.
Harm: Really?
Cloe: Yeah, although sometimes it's hard to tell what parts are true and what parts are just, well you know, her fantasies.
Harm to Mac: Goodnight, Ninja Girl.
Harm: Why don't you come with me and help me pick out a new car with Bud and Harriet.
Mac: Isn't that something Jordie should be doing?
Harm: Mac, you pick out a new car with your girlfriend, you might as well buy her a ring.
Harm: You ok?
Mac: Every time I think I've put the pieces of my life back together somebody comes along and jumbles them back up. Everybody who has ever meant anything to me is leaving my life.
Harm: It'll be OK, Mac, you'll get to see Chloe again. One day you'll have kids of your own.
Mac: Not at this rate, my biological clock is going off and I keep hitting the snooze button.
Harm: Tell you what. Five years from this moment if neither of us is in a relationship we'll go halves on a kid.
Mac: You and me? Have a baby together?
Harm: Yeah...your looks and my brains he'll be perfect.
Mac: And what if she has your looks and my brains.
Harm: That could work too. So what do you say. Deal?
Mac: Don't make a promise you can't keep.
Harm: I haven't yet.
Mac: I'm interested in the future to Harm, more and more I want a life that is simple, and good, a great career a good man...
Harm: "And shoes, lots and lots of comfortable shoes.
Mac: Did you think you'd sneak away without saying goodbye?
Harm: Well why goodbye and not goodluck?
Mac: Didn't I say that to you once when I was stupid enough to leave JAG?
Harm: Yes you did.
Mac: You said you were happy for me.
Harm: I was but that was different. You were in love.
Mac: And you're not?
Harm: What's love have to do with anything? Hey. (wipes Mac's tears)
Mac: You want me to water your plants while you're gone?
Harm: I don't have any plants.
Mac: Dammit. I have so much I want to say to you but I can't ...can't find the words.
Harm: I know. (they hug)
Mac: Damn you. Why am I the only one crying.
Harm: Anyone ever tell you you have great maternal instincts?
Mac: Not as often as they've told me I have a great karate chop!
Harm: In any language, what man understands a woman?
Mac: You're referring to me? Oh, let me guess, you don't understand why I was at the beach with Mic.
Harm: That opera house is beautiful isn't it?
Mac: Smashing. So, what bothered you, that I went to the beach with Mic or that you thought I was topless?
Harm: You weren't?
Mac: Harmon Rabb! You're a prude!
Harm: I am not! Look, I don't care if you wanna go topless.
Mac: You do if it's in front of Mic.
Harm: You work with the guy Mac! You wouldn't go topless in front of me would you?
Mac: Is that a request?
Harm: You know they wrote Eternity on this bridge in lights on New Years Eve
Mac: Is that how long we're gonna wait?
Harm: Mac.
Mac: We're not in Washington. We're not even on the same continent.
Harm: Location doesn't change who we are.
Mac: Most men would disagree with you.
Harm: I know. I disagree with me sometimes too.
Mac: But you still can't let go.
Harm: Not yet
Mac: You're just this way with me aren't you.
Harm: Yeah. Only with you.
Mac: I suppose I should be flattered.
Harm: You should Sarah.
Mac: I don't know why we couldn't work things out with us, Harm. So where does that leave us?
Harm: I don't know, Mac. At the end, I guess.
Mac: How about back at the beginning?
Chloe: Can your best friend become your boyfriend?
Mac: If you're lucky.
Sturgis: Eh-heh. You know what this is your problem. You don't do this any better with Harm.
Mac: (defensively) No, no, no. That's different.
Sturgis: In what way?
Mac: It just is.
Sturgis: There seems to be a certain tension with you two.
Mac: Some.
Sturgis: A lot.
Mac: Uh-wait you're missing the point Sturgis.
Sturgis: Come on Mac.
Mac: I've never slept with him.
Sturgis: Is that the problem?
Mac: There is no problem.
Sturgis: Then why don't you just get over it and move on?
Mac: It wouldn't work.
Sturgis: Why? (door closes)
Mac: Because I'm in love with him.
Harm: You have always been a good friend.
Mac: Friend?
Harm: What would you call us?
Mac: I don't know. You've seen me at my best, my worst. You've always been there for me too.
Harm: He was right.
Mac: About me being guilty?
Harm: No. About some people being in love with you.
Harm: What I want most Mac is to never lose you.
Mac: I promise you no matter what happens you won't lose me.
Harm: Mac, you have someone who will always love you.
Mac: And you have somebody that loves you.
She had figured out that sometimes the thing you wanted the most was often right in front of you the whole time. Funny how it always worked out like that.
A knock on her door interrupted her musings. She was so cold that she briefly thought about just staying on the couch and not answering it but a second, louder knock made her rise to her feet.
Still wrapped in her blankets, she slowly made her way to the door. Not even bothering to look out, she just opened it.
"Good morning, Mac," a male voice greeted her.
"Morning," she answered, sounding as if she had a cold.
"You feeling sick?" he asked, closing the door and following her back to the couch.
"Yes. Sick of this cold."
He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close against him. "Better?"
"Much."
The two sat there for a few minutes in silence, enjoying the company.
Finally, Harm spoke. "We'd better get going if we want to get up there before it gets dark."
"I know. My stuff's all packed and by the door."
"Why don't I run it down and then come back for you?"
Not even thinking of why she couldn't go down with him, she automatically answered, "Okay."
He leaned forward to kiss her on the forehead and got up from the couch. Grabbing her couple suitcases, he headed down to his SUV and put them in. He was back in her apartment minutes later.
"Ready to go?" he asked.
"Yeah." She didn't move.
He smiled. He was used to colder temperatures whereas Mac nearly hated them. Every winter was filled with colds and flu and snow and ice and unbearable temperatures. Not her choice weather location.
He grabbed her keys from off the kitchen counter and headed over to her. Without saying a word, he slid his arms underneath her, picked her up and headed for the door.
She squealed in surprise. "Harm! What are you doing? I can walk."
"I know."
Carefully maintaining balance, he somehow managed to lock her front door and headed down to his car, Mac in his arms, blankets and all. It was quite the sight.
Once again, somehow managing to keep her in his arms, he opened the passenger door and set her down. Once she was seated comfortably and buckled in he headed around to his side. Getting in, he quickly stuck the car keys in the ignition and turned the heater on full blast.
"Harm?"
"Yes?" He was half turned around, looking behind his seat for his missing cell phone.
A small hand on his arm caused him to turn back around to face Mac. She was smiling at him.
"You can be really sweet sometimes, you know that?"
"I try," he said, somewhat shyly and self-consciously.
She leaned over and gently brushed her lips against his cheek. "I love you."
"I love you too." His lips met hers in a tender kiss.
Those words were not said easily by either of them and they each knew that. However, they were true and honest and had been said. It was not the first time and it definitely would not be the last.
When they pulled away, she took a deep breath and spoke. "Okay, let's go. I think I'm ready to meet your grandma. After all, if I could handle your mom and Frank, Grandma Sarah should be easy, right?"
He just chuckled, pulling out of the parking space. "You just keep thinking that."
A worried look appeared on her face as she snuggled back down into her blankets and settled in for the drive up to his grandmother's farm in Pennsylvania.