Prologue.

My names Lauren Sunshine Curtis, most people call me Sunshine or Sunny 'cuz apparently Laurens to much of a normal name for a Curtis kid.

I have 3 older brothers, Ponyboy he's my older twin brother, then there's Sodapop, and our oldest brother and Guardian Darrel 'Darry'.

Now you may be wondering why Darry's our guardian and why I didn't mention our parents.

Well, that's because our parents died in an automobile accident back when I was thirteen.

Me and my parents were visiting our Aunt the next state over, my brothers decided not to come because apparently they were 'too old' to come with us.

On the way home we were involved in a wreck with a drunk driver, the driver apparently died on impact but my parents weren't so lucky.

Now, I don't really remember much about the wreck, but what I do remember haunts me in my dreams.

I remember hitting my head on the side window and my mum screaming and dad shouting. I remember my dad shouting and shaking my mum begging her to wakeup. I think I must have said something 'cause my dad turned to me with tears streaming down his face and begged me not to move. I didn't really know what he was talking about until I stupidly tried to move. White hot pain shot through me. Crying my dad grabbed my shoulders and pushed me back against the back seat and told me I had abit of glass in my stomach. I looked down at my stomach and there really was a piece of glass in my stomach and it was huge! I think I passed out the because the next thing I know my dads sitting beside me holding my hand and still crying.

'Daddy' I whimpered

'Sunny, don't move baby girl' he whispered

'It hurts' I whimpered again

'I know sweetheart, I know' he soothed squeezing my hand

I leaned against my dad and I heard him singing quietly 'you are my sunshine, my only sunshine, you make me happy when skies are grey'.

My dad used to sing that song to me when I was younger and upset and to hear him sing it again after quite awhile just made me want to curl up and cry. So I did, cry that is.

I don't remember being in a coma but I remember my brothers talking to me sometimes, I remember the rest of the gang having a few words, heck I remember Dally coming in and telling me 'I need to wake the heck up'.

When I woke up, nothing really registered but the fact that I had been in a coma for 6months and I was suddenly 14 instead of 13.

Darry tried to explain to me what happened in the crash, he told me that mum had died within minutes of the crash but dad had survived until help arrived, while I was unconscious.

To be honest, I went mad at hearing that both my parents were dead.

Soda told me that the courts got involved after that and they wanted to split us and put soda and pony in a boys home and ship me off to a different state, but Darry stepped in and said he would take Guardian ship over me and my brothers.

The next few months were spent trying to get through my physiotherapy and moving on.

Not as easy as it sounds.

Just a week after finishing my physiotherapy events happened that changed not only my life but everybody else's.

Now don't get me wrong, Darry and Pony do love each other, I mean of course they do but their both so stubborn and bull-headed that neither will back down from and argument and it always ends up with me and Soda in the middle of their argument.

Darry gets frustrated with Pony because he never uses his head and Pony gets angry at Darry because all Darry does is shout at Pony.

When Ponyboy came home late from the lot because he had fallen asleep there with Johnny, Darry blew up and the fight escalated to Darry hitting Pony and ended with Pony running out of the house.

That was the last we saw of Ponyboy for a week.

We found out that Johnny and Pony had ran away because Johnny killed a Soc.

No one wanted to believe that gentle Johnny could kill a soc but we faced facts that he did, for what ever reason we knew it was a last resort for him.

We got a phone call one night from the hospital saying that a Ponyboy Curtis, Johnny Cade and Dallas Winston were brought in from fire.

We got to the hospital and there was Ponyboy face black with soot and smoking in the corridor.

When it was Soda he ran to first, that hurt but it hurt even more when he ran to Darry next and the three of them didn't even bother about me when they all had a group hug.

Things hadn't really been the same between us since the accident, I thought it was because they blamed me.

Darry was crying all throught that and told Ponyboy that he thought he'd lost him like mum and dad.

Never once, while I was in hospital, did Darry ever say he was worried about me, neither did Soda, Pony didn't really visit me at all.

On the drive home, all these crazy thoughts were racing through my head, I knew they were all crazy but I couldn't help it, at the time they all made sense to me.

The stress of Pony and Johnny's disappearing act caught up with everyone.

Pony and Darry were fighting again , and even me and Soda were fighting.

The week Pony ran away Soda's girlfriend left him and moved to Florida because she was pregnant with another mans baby. Soda had been writing to her, begging her to come back, but the letters were returned unopened.

I really did try and be supportive for all 3 of my brothers but none of them accepted my help and it all just turned back into another big fight.

The worst and last fight I had with Soda started out as nothing but it escalated because Soda was depressed and angry about another of his letters being returned.

'If you didn't spend so much time with Steve and more time round here then maybe you'd know more about what's going on in this house!' Soda shouted at me 'Your so selfish!'

'Selfish? I'm selfish? You're the one that's ragging on me and Steve! Just 'cuz Sandy left you don't try and ruin me and Steve! I can see why Sandy would rather run to Florida then be with you!'

Next thing I know Soda's fist is swinging and my heads hitting the wall.

I remember Pony pulling Soda back and Darry running and helping me off the floor and shouting at Soda.

Turns out Darry was shouting at Soda because there was a scheduled social visit the next day.

I didn't really care, all that was running through my mind was my brother had hit me, had actually hit me that hard it knocked me into the wall and onto the floor.

I couldn't be in the same room as any of my brothers so I pushed outta Darrys arms and ran to my room, slammed the door and slid down it to the floor.

For the first time since my parents died I was scared, scared of my brother, someone who was meant to make me feel safe and protected, right then I felt as if I needed protecting from the protector.

Everyone tried talking to me, or getting me to open the door but I just couldn't, right then I needed to be alone, but I knew Pony slept outside my door and I found out later that Soda stayed awake the whole night just sitting on the sofa staring at my bedroom door.

I didn't leave my room till the next morning and only cuz the Social worker came by on one of her visits.

The moment I stepped into the living room a tense silence filled the room, everyone was staring at me Darry and Pony were staring with their mouths hanging open, Soda had gone white and the Social worker in anger.

The visit lasted about quarter of the time they usually did before the social worker left.

When she left Darry jumped up and grabbed my face and tilted my face upwards to look at my right cheek

'Crap, Sunny didn't you think to ice this? You know what the social will be thinking now! They'll think one of us did it!' Darry sighed

'one of you did' I whispered

Soda choked, Pony paled and Darry sighed and rubbed my cheek gently with his thumb

'I know Sunny, and you could be sent to a girls home if this is reported!' Darry said

'At least you won't have to put up with selfish me then' I whispered and walked back into my room and flopped on my bed.

I must have fell asleep because the next time there was a knock on the door it was getting dark outside.

When Darry shouted me to come through, there was an odd shake to his voice.

When I walked into the living room I noticed the whole gang was there apart from Johnny and the social worker was back.

The next hour passed in a blur of Pony crying, Dally, Darry and Steve shouting, Two Bit with his arm round a pale and shaking Soda.

Because of one stupid argument that ended with a bruise, I, Lauren Sunshine Curtis, was being removed from Darry's custody and into a girls home across the country with immediate effect.

I don't remember packing my things or saying goodbye, the only thing I remember about that day is Darry hugging me and telling me he loved me, Pony just hugged me and was bawling but Soda just stood there on the porch hands shoved in his pockets smoking.

Darry saw me staring at Soda and just turned me away saying Soda's sorry and he'll talk to him. Darry, Pony and the gang promised they would get me back, but I knew they wouldn't get me back, the Social wouldn't let them.

At the age of 14 until I was 18 I lived with the Sawyer family in New York for a year, without one visitfrom my brothers and only 1 letter off Ponyboy.

At the age of 15 the Sawyer family moved to England and took me with them.

Living in England was good, apart from actually living with the Sawyers. Mr Sawyer, to put it nicely, didn't like me and told me and showed me at every opportunity.

Mrs Sawyer spent everyday at work or shopping.

The only person to talk was their son Dean who was a year older then me, his parents didn't like him either.

This is my story beginning when I turned 18 and decided to go back to Tulsa to confront my past and brothers.