Disclaimer: I own nothing, everything is property of Square-Enix and Buena Vista.
Warnings: Shounen-ai, character death, Roxas's mixed messages, attempted fight scene... and... *thinks* Nope, nothing I can think of.
"AXEL!"
This couldn't be real… who was screaming? Was it Him? Was it me?
"AXEL! DON'T! PLEASE AXEL! DON'T LEAVE ME!" I've never heard this… wait; this is the voice I heard before I woke up!
"AXEL!" That final scream as Axel disappeared completely… it hurt to hear. Loss, desperation, anger, self-hatred… This has to be Roxas's voice… I noted. Standing up to continue on my way. Axel had opened that portal, we didn't know how long it would stay open…
Donald, Goofy and I walked through the portal, the King fallowing and running ahead a little. We walked over to him, fallowing his gaze and finding tall buildings and flashing neon-signs in an otherwise dark city, looking up we saw that the stars were muted by the glow from a huge heart-shaped moon. Now if that wasn't just the weirdest thing ever…
The King ran ahead and we fallowed once more, slaying who-knows-how-many Shadow and Neo-shadow type heartless. The never stopped coming, no matter how many were slain, they just kept attacking. Though usually it was only in groups of three that they attacked, and with my new Bond of Flames, they fell easily… something told me that this specific Keyblade could very well save my life very soon. That's the only reason I was using it instead of OathKeeper.
As we walked down another street a pair of Nobodies… Samurai, I think, surrounded Donald and Goofy; they'd been walking a few feet behind me… Then a dark portal opened and a dark figure stepped out, they were wearing the Organization XIII cloak. The person had a bad air around him… the air of hatred.
And then they started forming a Keyblade. I don't know how I recognized it before it was fully formed… but it was a Keyblade… a dark Keyblade. In his other hand, my very own OathKeeper formed. He launched himself at me. And I could swear I heard him bite back a sob.
Suddenly, we were in a very familiar place, the Platforms from my dreams… wait a minute… why was /my/ picture on the platform? I wasn't left time to ponder that, and I was thankful that I already had Bond of Flames out or I'd have fallen prey to the other key-bearer's key-blades.
We locked blades, and I saw a small flicker of light ocean-blue under the boy's hood, right where his eyes should be… so he had blue eyes? Wait, why was I pondering this when he was trying to kill me? Oh, right, because something was screaming at me not to harm him.
Kill, kill, kill, kill…
My chest burned from the pain that had shot through it before, when I'd seen that sudden flash from Sora's end of our connection, the connection said Brunette that I currently was engaging in battle was completely unaware off. That flash of images had nearly killed me on the spot… Axel, on his back and fading… his eyes begging for something…
And then I'd relived the flash but with the spoken words.
"I wanted to see Roxas." Sora had been startled by this, still not knowing who I was. "He… was the only one I liked." A partial lie, before I came along, he'd hated the rest of the Organization, once I came along, he and Demyx had started to associate more, and as a result of associating and getting along with the water user, he'd come to get along fairly well with Zexion. "He made me feel… like I had a heart." Axel had chuckled a bit there, while Sora tried to figure out what he meant. "It's… kind of funny… you make me feel… the same…" Strangely, that comment hadn't scorched my soul, it had soothed it… I couldn't help the screams that had started to escape my lips as Axel started to truly fade, trying desperately to somehow force my screams past Sora's lips… I'd failed to accomplish that task and Axel had faded…
"WHY!" I demanded suddenly, I'm not entirely sure what we'd just done, just that it involved doing a fancy flip in the air. "WHY DIDN'T YOU LISTEN! WHY DID HE CHOOSE YOU!" I demanded as I tried to fight back my tears for Axel… the tears that I'd been too shocked to send through Sora before.
The boy had spoken… judging by his voice, I could safely guess that he was younger than me… But from the strength that he was pounding against my Keyblade with, it couldn't have been by much…
I knocked Bond of Flames… MY KEYBLADE FROM AXEL away from Sora, I'm not sure he realized that if that blade wasn't so damn important to me, He'd be dead. He moved to jump and grab it, but I rammed OathKeeper's blade into the handle so he couldn't grab it.
"ANSWER ME!" I snarled. Sora stared at me for a moment before reaching out of the blade, which faded into light and re-appeared in his hand. "Huh?" I didn't have time to recover and react before he'd run the burning blade across my chest. It burned… it burned so much… OathKeeper and Oblivion fell from my hands. Disappearing into light and darkness respectively.
Somehow, I felt… satisfied. But… that didn't stop me from wanting to kill the Brunette that was my Somebody… who should be a heartless…
I felt myself stumbling forward, my hood somehow falling back in the process of falling to my knees for a moment. I stared at the images near the head of the image of Sora on the ground below us.
"You let him die." I stated. My tears were falling freely now.
"…You're talking about Axel, right?" No shit, Sherlock.
"No, I'm talking about Demyx. OF COURSE I'm talking about Axel!" I snapped, standing and spinning on my heel to face him, an angry scowl firm on my face.
He took a step back.
"Who…"
"Number Thirteen, Roxas, the Key of Destiny. I used to be part of the Organization." I snapped. "That Keyblade in your hand was the sign of the Bond Axel and I shared. Stop using it. It's not rightfully yours to use." This seemed to get him angry.
"You're telling me not to use a specific Keyblade! You're using MY OathKeeper!" he snapped, I grinned and laughed.
"/YOUR/ OathKeeper… a Keyblade of light, which is my element. I summoned my blade's at random when I discovered that I could double-wield, I wound up with Light and Darkness." I pointed out. Sora stared at me.
"Why did OathKeeper…" he started.
"My, my… no wonder Zexion and the rest of them were surprised when I proved my intelligence. You're an idiot Sora. You got that blade moments after I was 'born' in to this non-existence."
"So you /are/ a Nobody!" he exclaimed.
"Not just any Nobody, Sora… see, the thing about Organization XIII, they take the names of our Somebodies, rearrange them, and add an 'X'. My name is 'Roxas'. R-o-x-a-s."
He stared at me stupidly.
"Huh?"
"Use your brain Sora."
"Uh…" again, that stupid stare. I felt my eye-twitch.
"S-o-r-a… R-o-x-a-s. Take the 'X' out of my name, Sora." I watched as his brain fried as he tried to figure it out.
"Sora… wait a minute! Y-you're me!" I smiled, finally, getting somewhere.
"No… I'm your Nobody." I felt my smile fade. "I hate you Sora… truly I do… and don't you give me any of that 'Nobodies can't feel and thus they can't hate' shit. That's a lie. We can feel, because I know what this burning in my chest is, its hatred, anger, and the pain of loss all mixed together. Because I know what happened to Axel… and I'm going to kill you for it when I get the chance."
So maybe I was a little harsh. He deserved it… he watched… just watched… as Axel died… and then had the nerve to use Bond of Flames as he weapon of choice…
"You… make a good other." I heard myself say… What the fucking Hell? Where did that come from!
He stared at me as I walked away, meh, I have that affect on people. Mixed Messages…
What in the world? 'You make a good other' and he walks away after promising to kill me? Wait a minute… how'd I get back to The World That Never Was?
"Sora!" Goofy exclaimed before he and Donald tackled me.
"What… just happened?" I asked stupidly… was that kid, Roxas… right? Was I an idiot?
"You suddenly disappeared, and we had to fight some Nobodies." Goofy explained.
"Did… did you see that guy?" I questioned, bad move judging by the stares I received from my friends.
"What guy?" Donald questioned, I stared at them for a moment before shaking my head and pushing myself off the ground.
"Never mind. My mind must be playing tricks on my because of the lack of light here." I decided.
Goofy and Donald gave me a weird look; I could feel it on my back, before fallowing me as I'd decided to keep moving.
I found myself curled in a tight ball in Betwixt and Between, sitting where Sora had, and staring at the stop Axel had died in. I knew it was the right spot because the air had yet to cool down from the heat he'd been giving off. I was crying, loosing my self control… I buried my face in my knees, hiding most of my head except my unruly hair from view with my arms and sobbed… It hurt… it hurt so bad… My chest was tight and burning, trying to suffocate itself and end this miserable non-existence that was made worse with-out Axel's presence.
I don't know how long I cried… just that it was for hours… and hours and hours… I think I cried myself to sleep, still sitting curled in my tight little ball to protect myself from any other emotional blows that might come at me.
Then I started waking.
"Finally woken up?" I heard that familiar voice and gasped. Axel?
I looked to my right, finding myself somehow on the Station Tower in Twilight Town. He was standing next to me, watching the sunset.
"Axel." I'm surprised my voice didn't crack.
He was quiet for a long while.
"Nope, maybe you're going to sleep." He paused. "Soon I won't even be able to talk to your consciousness like this." Ouch… that hurt… Wait… were we even having a real conversation? Or just making observations?
"I… I think I'm going back to how I was." I heard myself say… leading me to believe that my latter guess as to what we were saying was the correct one. Axel sat down next to me, his high body temperature soothed me somehow, and we weren't even touching.
"I've thought about it a lot. Naminé said the same thing." He noted. His expression faded from his soft smile to a frown. "Roxas… you have a heart, don't you?" he questioned. The question tore said object apart within me. "While Naminé and I…" I waited for what he'd say, because it was tearing me apart. "We don't really have hearts, do we?" Axel… please don't say that… after how many times you told me you loved me… don't start contradicting that… please…
"I… I don't know either." I admitted.
"I guess not…" he mumbled. Why was this hurting so much… he looked so lost… his own heart being torn… and mine? Mine had been shattered when He'd died… right? Of course… I'd felt his death before I saw the flashes… I'd felt cold and empty suddenly…
"But… the hearts not something you can see." I pointed out suddenly. Thank you instinct and love! "I've started wondering whether it's something you can't feel either…" …I take back my praise for instinct and love… I basically just screamed that we're Nobodies and don't have hearts, or if we do, we'll never know because even Somebodies can't feel theirs… Bastards… they take what they have for granted… "If so, then…" wait, where was my mouth taking me with this? "Nah, never mind." DAMNIT! WORK YOU STUPID APENDAGE! GAH!
"Hm? What are you getting at?" Good question Axel, why don't you ask my mouth since it suddenly has a mind of its own? …Damn it. Why Am I mentally taking this out on him, it's not his fault my mouth isn't listening to my brain.
"I'm sure Sora'll find the answer." No wonder I'm so full of self-loathing… I hate Sora. "Because he's me." That's why. Damn it. Axel… kiss me or something so I can get my mouth to do what my brain wants it too. Oh well, at least I'm praising myself… but through that, I'm praising Sora. Gah… I heard Axel chuckle softly beside me.
"Yep, that's true." Since when does Axel say 'yep'? Oh well… at least we had a comfortable silence for a moment. Suddenly, there was a bar of Sea-salt ice cream in front of me, courtesy of Axel who'd procured a bar for each of us from somewhere. I smiled at him in thanks. He smiled in return before we returned to watching the sunset as he munched on his bar.
We had that comfortable silence for a while as we licked our ice cream, or in Axel's case, ate it because he'd make it melt to quickly to savor.
"This really takes me back. D'you remember?" he questioned suddenly, grabbing my attention again. "We first met the day you got your new name. And then we watched the sunset from up here." Yes… I remembered that very well. Because we were sharing our first kiss later that night.
"Yeah. This is where I came from." I replied. I felt a sudden sadness though. "Everyone… Hayner, Pence, Olette… I hope they're okay…" when did I get so sappy?
Axel turned to face me, his eyes shining warmly in encouragement.
"You should go and see them again, looking for your answer." He pointed out, a felt that warm happiness again.
"Yeah…" I voice, really, when did I turn into such a sap? Wait… oh, I know this tug… my time was running out in this 'dream world'… "So… I have to go." I voiced, sadly. "Sora's waiting for me." My tone dropped as I tried to show my displeasure at A: Parting from Axel, and B: Parting from Axel so I could see a little boy who I hated with a passion… hmm… that fire magic Axel taught me was starting to look very useful… now if only I could get Bond of Flames away from the little Shit…
Axel's tone was dejected.
"Yeah, I guess he is." It hurt to hear his voice drop like that… like when I left the Organization… like when I'd left him… I watched him take a huge bite out of his ice-cream and look away from me. "Whoa, this ice cream is salty!" he announced. I wanted to scream at him… tell him that he didn't have to hide his face; that I didn't want to leave him again…
I don't know how long we sat there after that… but Axel didn't look at me again. It hurt… then... the pain intensified and I shot him an apologetic look, I knew my eyes were screaming the pain in my heart at leaving him as the light surrounded me, trying to pull me back to the 'real world'.
"See ya, Axel." I voiced, trying to promise without saying the words that I'd see him again… no matter what.
He looked at me, a sad smile on his face, eyes exposing his broken heart, it hurt so much to see that look in his eyes again… but the light was surrounding him too…
"Mata na, Aibou." He replied, 'partner' in its truest form… Axel… please… I don't want to leave, don't let me leave you! Hold me in your arms… don't let this light carry me away!
And then we were parted again, I failed to see past the light well enough to see the tear slide down his cheek and hit the ground beside us as we faded from each other's presence.
I felt a tug in my heart, like the echo of the broken heart I'd experienced when I had to lock Riku on the opposite side of the Door to Darkness. I don't know how I knew… but I knew that it came from Roxas… over Axel… and I wished I'd screamed the pyro's name as he faded, because I know my voice would have become Roxas's… because I would really have been Roxas screaming.