I slowed my pace, not wanting to eavesdrop. He ran his fingers through his hair and Ron laughed at something he had just said. I tried not to think what it would feel like to have those fingers running through my hair. At the thought, I reached up and twirled the end of my braid nervously through my own. Harry turned around smiling. My stomach lurched and I smiled back nervously, but just as I did, Cho Chang walked past me and Harry's eyes followed her. I dropped my gaze immediately and kept walking until he turned around the corner, and then turned, and ran in the opposite direction.
I was sick of it. Sick of the awful feeling I got in my stomach whenever he was watching me. Sick of running my fingers nervously through my hair like an idiot whenever I saw him coming. Sick of struggling to find something to say when he talked to me. My book bag knocked against my knees as I ran down the torch lit corridor towards Gryffindor tower. I felt a lump rise in my throat and my eyes burn as I continued to run. I only stopped when I got to the Fat Lady, mumbling the password "faerie lights" under my breath as I wiped my eyes on the sleeve of my robe.
"Dear, are you alright?" she asked.
"Faerie lights!" I shouted with a sob, stomping my foot. I knew I was acting childish, but I didn't care. She swung open, looking offended. Ignoring this, I hurried up to my dorm where I threw myself onto my four-poster bed and hugged my pillow tightly to my chest. I was such an idiot for thinking he would ever like me. I was just his best friend's dumb little sister. I was nobody. I buried my face in the pillow and hot tears soaked the pillowcase and burned my flushed cheeks. I heard the door close gently and soft footsteps across the floor. I rolled my eyes behind my closed eyelids. Great, just what I needed, someone to ask me what was wrong. I didn't want to talk to anyone about that, and I was prepared to tell them so. But then I felt a weight as they sat down on the bed next to me. I lay still hoping they would just go away. I felt a warm hand rest on my back.
"Ginny." It was Hermione. I should have known. But I was surprised to find that I didn't mind that she was there. I was almost relieved, almost glad that she had come. She knew how I felt about him. Maybe, just maybe I could talk to her. I tried to stop crying, I tried to let Hermione comfort me, I tried to breathe normally and think straight, but it was no use. Harry's smile seemed to be burned onto the inside of my eyelids. I was tortured by it, knowing that he could never look at me the same way.
"Hey, hey. Listen to me, okay?" Hermione said quietly, her hand left my back and found my tightly clenched fist instead. Her thumb ran over my white knuckles until they softened and I let her fingers slide into mine and held on to them because at that moment, the world felt like it was slipping away and I was looking for anything that might help me cling on. Finally I turned my head to look at her and she smiled. Her free hand wiped the tears from my face and then rest on my knees, which were curled nearly to my chest.
"Hermione, I'm… I…" I couldn't go on. I broke down again and Hermione moved closer so I could rest my head on her lap. One of her hands traced my hair around my ear and down to the end of my plait, while the other still held tightly onto mine. I took another deep breath.
"Do you think… Do you think he ever notices me?" I didn't mean it to come out sounding so pleading and pathetic.
"Well," she paused which gave me time to push myself into a half- seated position and look desperately up to her. "…I think that when someone risks their life slaying a basilisk for you, you don't just give up on them."