A/N: Ben was always Krylo, and that's not his parents' fault. Inspired by the beautiful fanart that you can find if you go to the link I put on the image and add [slash]art[slash]Snore-591221473 at the end of the url (FFN, your no-external-links policy sucks :):) our work was ripped and you did nothing :):))
Thanks a lot to oparu for the beta, and again, thanks to the Guest reviewers I can't contact back! (To the one who signs as Leia, I really want to know which part in Walk your days on a wire sounded like something Carrie would say!)
Just as soon (hand it over to) a Wookiee
He didn't react to the noise at once; it crept into his dreams and he let it sit there, barely paying attention as his brain insisted on pulling him back into a deep sleep. It was even comforting, that rhythmic hum, like the engines of the Falcon; it made Han feel as if that was where he was.
Suddenly, the noise grew louder—it wasn't a hum as much as a rasping, or a growl. That's when he finally woke up, bolting upright, his hand sweeping on instinct over the module next to the bed.
'Shhhh!' he heard next, and Han vaguely realised he'd knocked several items to the floor. He rubbed a hand vigorously over his eyes and turned towards the source of the shushing.
He was not on the Falcon, but in his and Leia's bedroom. His wife was lying on the other side of the bed, her white nightgown illuminated by the blue glow of an overhead light, a half-undone braid draped over her shoulder. Her head was turned sideways and she had a worried look on her face as she kept an eye on the baby currently sprawled between them. It was only then that Han felt awake enough to notice that Ben had been the one producing what he could only assume was snoring, though it sounded like a failing engine.
When it was clear that Ben had no intentions of waking up, Leia let out a relieved breath before raising her head slightly and frowning at Han.
'Be quiet; he just fell asleep!' she mouthed.
Like he wasn't well aware of that fact, Han thought, flopping back down and covering his face with his hands again as he suppressed the urge to groan.
People who had kids had told them that, once the baby was born, they'd find themselves becoming more alert, waking up at the minimal noise or movement. It had been the opposite for Han. Having spent most of his life on one spacecraft or another, and half as a captain of his own, he was already a light sleeper, capable of getting up in an instant and fall back down once he made sure there was no danger. With the baby, it had been the same way the first months—hell, he was so tiny and defenceless, Han couldn't help but check on him all the time, noise or not, whenever Leia wasn't looking. However, Ben was eight months now, and he hadn't quite stopped being a bit fussy, and on top of that, he'd been with a horrible cold for a couple of days now. Han had accumulated so many months of exhaustion and sleep deprivation, he was sure a rancor could burst through the door now and he'd just keep on sleeping. He couldn't have slept for more than half an hour before Ben's snoring woke him up. He hadn't even felt the stabbing on his lower back of—he reached under himself and pulled out an X-wing toy, winced, and dropped it on the floor. There was something close to his head, too, and one of the kid's legs remained propped over his stomach.
'How do you turn him off?' Han asked in a scratchy whisper.
'It doesn't say in the manual,' Leia whispered back.
'We're supposed to sleep when he sleeps; why won't he let us have that?'
'He's congested, it's not his fault,' Leia said, reaching out to brush the hair from Ben's forehead. Han saw there was an assortment of toys on her side, too, and that Ben was also touching his mother, as if anchoring both of his parents to him.
'And I don't know why it surprises you, really,' Leia went on, looking at him over the baby's head. 'He snores like his father.'
Han snorted. 'He snores like a Wookiee.' He narrowed his eyes at Leia. 'Unless you're tryin' to tell me somethin' here, Princess.'
Leia clapped a hand over her mouth as she giggled. 'Yes; that I've always thought you were half-Wookiee yourself, hotshot.'
Ben let out another shuddering snore and shifted, moaning softly. Han held his breath and stood frozen in place, exchanging a mildly horrified sideways look with Leia.
Once again, though, Ben appeared to be deeply asleep.
'I want to die,' Han said.
'No you don't.'
'No I don't,' he agreed, turning as much as he dared on his side and looking intently at Leia. 'But I really need a good, uninterrupted night's sleep or I am going to die soon.'
'You told me you could keep up, old man,' Leia said, smirking.
'Hey, Your Worship, first of all, that hurts, and second, I can keep up plenty,' Han answered, wagging a finger at her.
She chuckled softly. Despite her teasing, she looked as haggard as he was—only she wore it much better than Han.
'How do you feel about leaving Threepio in here while we go sleep on the Falcon for a couple hours?'
For a moment, Leia looked tempted to say yes. In the end, she looked down and shook her head. 'No, that's awful… he'll wake up and we won't be here.'
'Yeah.'
At this time of the night, Han felt as if his brain was fighting a battle with itself, the only outcome of which would be the headache that was already puncturing his brow. He didn't think he could have done it, either, not really. He could see why people said he'd become "respectable" when he married Leia. Not a softie, though.
'Hey,' Leia called. 'I promise, as soon as he gets better, we make plans to have a full night to ourselves.'
'Like a date night?'
'Yes, except no fancy restaurant or sex,' Leia said. 'We just order in and sleep a lot.'
Han winked at her.
'Sounds exciting.'
Ben sneezed. For the third time, there was a moment of bated-breath expectation, and then—
They both sat up but Han picked up the baby first, his resigned sigh buried under the wailing of his firstborn.
'Are you sure Chewie's not the father of your child, Leia? Because I wouldn't take it too hard being replaced right now, sweetheart!'
