Title: So Far From Normal
Author: Seether79
Characters: Jack/Ianto, Team
Rating: R
Spoilers: General spoilers for both seasons
Summary: Ianto isn't sure of what he wants anymore
Beta: lj user"the9thdoctor" at lj user"plotbunniesinc"
Author's Notes: Set after adrift
Disclaimer: I do not own Torchwood (There would be a lot more boy action if I did)
Chapter 1: Just another day
Ianto Jones looked at his reflection in the mirror as he patted down his blue silk tie carefully. He adjusted the cufflinks on his shirt and straightened his collar carefully. He looked at himself again and smiled sadly; another day was ready to start and all Ianto wanted to do was sleep. He was tired, tired of Torchwood and tired of his life.
He picked up his wallet and phone placing them in his trouser pockets before heading into the living room. Jack had made a mess last night; pushing Ianto across the room and slamming him into wall before he went down on his knees and gave Ianto what only could be described as the most sinfully wonderful blowjob ever given. In the throes of their passion they had managed to devastate Ianto's living room and turn it into a disaster zone. Ianto had been too tired to clean up afterwards and decided to leave it till morning. Jack had sneaked off once he thought Ianto was asleep; Ianto never was and always heard the older man leave, but he never spoke about it, letting Jack keep his routines.
Ianto normally hated a messy living room, the overturned pillows, the mail splashed across the floor would drive him nuts; but today he really didn't care. His relationship with Jack and his position at Torchwood were slowly sucking the life out of him. His life wasn't what he had expected it to be and as he got older he realized that life had very little to offer you when you had lost hope.
He went to his kitchen counter and picked up his car keys and the to-do list that he had written out the night before. He need to go to the dry cleaners and pick up two of Jack's shirts before going to the supermarket and picking up some milk and Gwen's favorite chocolate for the Hub. Then he needed to go the mobile shop and see if they had fixed Owen's phone yet, which had been thrown into a puddle of water during a particularly nasty alien hunt. At some stage he also needed to do some shopping for himself since he no longer had anything edible in his home, a fact which had escaped him until he went to make himself some dinner last night and had found all he had was a moldy carrot and some very dry cereal.
He looked at the mess and at himself one last time before leaving his apartment; not even bothering to lock the door, he had nothing worth stealing.
"Just because he's old doesn't make him crazy, Owen." Gwen said as she ran a hand through her hair.
"He was talking about elephants wearing pink skirts and plotting world domination... He was stark raving mad." Owen replied.
Ianto watched them fight as he walked into the Hub slowly; his hands were full and he really didn't want to drop the milk and have to go out and buy another one. "Morning." He said in the happiest voice he could muster. He was surprised to see everyone was already here but knew his morning errands had taken him longer than expected and had caused him to arrive over half an hour later than he normally did.
"Ianto, Thank God. Do you think you could make me one of your glorious coffees? I need something to help get over this horrible morning." Gwen asked him with a smile.
"Not a problem." Ianto smiled at her.
"Did you know how much longer my phone will be?" Owen asked him.
"They tell me tomorrow." Ianto replied.
"That's what they said yesterday." Owen complained.
Ianto just ignored him as he made his way to the kitchen area, placing Jack's shirts across a chair before starting the coffee machine up. He really wasn't in the mood for anyone today – he figured he might hide out in the Tourist office for the day and just hope that nothing dire came up that needed his attention.
He worked quickly getting everyone's coffee ready, except Owen of course, since dead man don't drink, delivering them to Gwen and Tosh before picking up Jack's shirt and coffee and making his way to his boss' office. He knocked lightly before entering, seeing Jack sitting at his desk with a confused look on his face. "Coffee, sir." Ianto said as he placed the beverage in front of him.
"Thanks." Jack said. "Do you know if the PM has called back yet?"
"He's not calling till this afternoon." Ianto told him. "I also have your shirts."
"What would I do without you?" Jack smiled as he stood up.
"Walk around topless, I imagine." Ianto replied.
"I doubt you would mind." Jack smirked as he stepped up and pulled Ianto over to him.
Ianto let himself be pulled towards the older man and couldn't help but moan lightly when Jack's mouth started to kiss up his neck. "Work... hours. The others." Ianto said, but he could already feel his body responding to Jack's lips and hands.
"They can watch if they want." Jack laughed as he spun them around and slammed Ianto into his desk.
Ianto felt Jack rubbing him through his trousers and leaned up to capture the captain's lips in a passionate kiss. His mind always seemed to stop working whenever he was around Jack. "God." Ianto said breathlessly as he started to unbutton Jack's shirt, sliding his hand against the smooth skin.
"You smell so good." Jack whispered to him as he shifted their bodies so their cocks rubbed together through the fabric of their clothes. "I could touch you all day."
"What the..." Ianto said as the rift alarm started to sound. He and Jack both quickly got up and made themselves presentable before heading down to the others.
"We'll finish that later." Jack said with a wink. "What's going on?"
"Rift activity..." Tosh said still scanning her computer screen. "Near Hope Street, might just be a Weevil."
"Gwen, Owen with me." Jack said. He turned and smirked at Ianto before the three made their way towards the garage.
"Would you like a coffee?" Ianto asked Tosh.
"Still working on the first one." Tosh replied with a grin and she picked up her mug and showed it to him. "You alright, you look a little flustered?"
"Oh, I'm fine." Ianto blushed as he straightened a few papers on Gwen's desk.
Ianto sighed as he continued to flip through the magazine he was pretending to read; he couldn't concentrate and wasn't really all that interested in it. As usual his thoughts were on Captain Jack Harkness and the very confusing relationship he had with the man. Sometimes Jack showed him such love and affection in the way that he treated him that Ianto was sure there was meaning in what they had; but other times Jack was distant and distracted and would only notice him when he was in the mood, to put it bluntly, for a 'fuck'. Also there was the Gwen issue, Ianto wasn't blind – he saw the way those two looked at each other and found himself wondering that if Gwen wasn't a happily married woman, would Jack still be with him or would he be with her?
Not that Jack was faithful, not at all. Ianto knew he had sex with many people that weren't him. But Jack had told him when they first started this dysfunctional coupling that he was not a one man kind of guy. Jack was free to fuck whoever he wanted and that went both ways, not that Ianto ever took advantage of it. He didn't see the point of sleeping around when he was perfectly content with the sex he and Jack were having.
Ianto could always tell when Jack had been with someone else but neither he, nor Jack, ever mentioned it. Ianto was grateful for that. Hearing past tales of Jack's sexual exploits was one thing but he really didn't need to hear about the current ones as well. So Jack would look at him and they would both know and a silence would fill the room until finally Jack made one of his god-awful come-ons and they would fuck and laugh and nothing changed. Everything stayed the same and at first Ianto had loved it, but now it was driving him mad.
Ianto never wanted to change Jack; he didn't expect for Jack to declare his undying love for him and promise faithfulness. There was no point in trying to change the way someone lives, especially when they had been living that way for over a hundred years, but Ianto had thought he could changehimself; that he could be in a fun and spontaneous relationship with Jack with no commitment and no promises and be happy with that. He thought that he could become like Jack but no such luck. The longer they were together, the more Ianto fell for him and the more he wished they had a normal relationship.
He heard the familiar ring of his mobile message tone and picked it up to look, it was from Jack.
Been hard for you all day, makes alien hunting very difficult. Might send the others home early and then have you on my desk ;)
Ianto sighed; it was typical Jack, but the worst part was that the moment he was within a meter of the older man he would forget about his worries and the way he was feeling and Jack would have him bent over his desk in no time. It wasn't Jack's fault, how was he supposed to know the way Ianto was feeling when Ianto never told him? Ianto didn't blame Jack for any of it; he just wished he could tell him what he was thinking instead of self analyzing to the point where he hated himself and wished he could just shut his own head up.
"Another day in the fucked up head of Ianto Jones." He mumbled to himself with a bitter laugh.
Jack had been true to his word. Gwen, Owen and he had only been back for ten minutes when his three co-workers had their bags and coats in hand, heading for the door.
"See you tomorrow, Ianto." Tosh said with a smile and wave as she made her way out. Owen had already bolted for the door as quick as possible in case the boss changed his mind.
"Bye." Ianto replied with a small wave of his own.
"Any plans tonight?" Gwen asked him as she pulled her coat on.
"With Jack I think." Ianto replied.
"Have fun, but not too much." Gwen said with a small laugh.
Ianto made his way back to Jack's office wondering to himself if today would be the day he finally spoke up. The day he would finally tell Jack that he needed more than he was getting at the moment, that their relationship was destroying his state of mind and they needed to end this or change it, or just do something otherwise he would go crazy.
"What's wrong?" Jack asked him when he entered the office.
"What?" Ianto asked confused.
"I asked you what's wrong – you have a strange look on your face." Jack told him.
"Nothing." Ianto lied as always. It was never Jack's fault, he cared, he wanted to know. Ianto just didn't have the words, or if he did, he didn't know how to say them. He walked over to Jack and placed a light kiss on his lips. "How was the Weevil hunt?"
"Hard... the hunt wasn't hard, I was hard; which was a problem. I think Owen has a suspicion that I like Weevils a little too much now. I should have told him I'd been thinking about you and all the wonderfully naughty things I wanted to do to your body." Jack told him as he slipped Ianto's jacket off his shoulders.
"Really? Maybe we should do it in front of him one day; then he'll know who gets you hard." Ianto said as he started to undo the buttons on Jack's pale blue shirt.
"My kinky Ianto." Jack laughed already having managed to get all the buttons on Ianto's shirt undone and discarded the item to the floor of his office. Jack pushed his own shirt off as well, leaving both man in only their trousers. "Beautiful."
Ianto laughed. "You're not to bad yourself." he ran his hands down Jack's defined chest before reaching his belt; he started to un buckle it as Jack pulled him in for a long and passionate kiss that made Ianto feel dizzy with pleasure. Jack's kisses were like a drug; the whole world would fade away and he would lose himself in the other mans lips, World War Three could be happening and he wouldn't even notice it if Jack's mouth was on his. He noticed his pants were now at his ankles and found himself wondering how Jack always managed to disrobe him without his ever noticing.
"Work to do." Jack smiled as he went down on his knees.
"Jack..." Ianto moaned as he felt Jack kiss the tip of his cock lightly and run his hands along the back of his thighs. No, today would definitely not be the day he told Jack his feelings.
Ianto opened the door to his flat and sighed as he looked at the mess in his living room; he really should have cleaned that up before he went to work in the morning. He placed his keys on the counter in his kitchen and went to his fridge for dinner. Opening the door he realized he still hadn't gone to the supermarket to get food and unless he wanted a moldy carrot he would have to go without dinner.
He rubbed his temples hoping to stop the oncoming headache he could feel. He was just going to have a glass of water and then head to bed. He was too tired to bother with the mess right now; it would just have to wait till tomorrow. Ianto Jones had become and expert at putting things off lately.
TBC
A/N: Thanks to my lovely beta, thanks for reading and comments are love :))