Okay guys,
WARNING: This little fic is going to make no sense whatsoever. It was a dream I had, and I thought it was funny and insane enough to turn into some good readin'. Now, the whole fic is not the entire dream, the actual dream starts...well, when the insanity begins...which isn't very descriptive being the whole story is insane...I will bold the first sentence. The rest I made up so it would be more story like than just a random excerpt that makes you go WTF? Which, the part I made up before the dream part is WTF and I had to legit force myself to write it because it wasn't House. Alrighty. Have FuN! There are lemons...I love how people refer to smut that way. Or mile 12...if you've seen Rizzoli and Isles on TV when they run the marathon, you know what I'm talking about :D Now go laugh your asses off!
Also, I haven't unclaimed House in a while, so here it is. I do not own him, or Chase, or Cuddy, or any other House character. I am simply using them for fun to entertain myself and all of my loyal huddamaniacs.
Dr. Robert Chase let out a disgruntled sigh as he roughly sat down on one of the benches in the lobby of Princeton Plainsboro Teaching Hospital. He brought up his hands and dragged him down his face before rubbing his temples. He finally let himself catch up with the scene that happened in his shared apartment with his wife, Dr. Allison Cameron...or soon to be ex.
He decided that he wanted to start working for the infamous Dr. Gregory House again, but boy, did she completely react in the opposite way that he had hoped. She wanted to get as far away from this hospital as possible, he suspected, because she used to have a thing for House and did not want that resurfacing. She wanted him to leave the hospital with her, but he wanted to stay with House, and thus, ending their short marriage that she was unsure of to begin with.
The lesson he learned from all of this was you can't just have a sexual based relationship with somebody and not expect it to progress further than a roll in the hay a few times a week. The expression that sex kills proved itself true with this one. Sex is supposed to be fun, pleasurable, passionate. But, it also causes shitloads of trouble.
"Dr. Chase? Are you alright?" a familiar female voice rang out above his dropped head. He looked up to see a never sexier Dr. Lisa Cuddy standing next to him, a pile of files clutched to her chest, and her head cocked to one side. She seemed very perky today, both her mood and her appearance. Well, the files pushing her cleavage up more could have been the cause for that...
He stared blankly before losing all eye contact all together.
"Obviously, you're not. What's up?"
"Can we go somewhere private?" his heavily Australian accented voice scratched.
"I was just on my way back to my office, we can talk in there. I'll have it that nobody disturbs us." she stated.
He pulled himself up and followed his boss's lead, getting an occasional glimpse of her ever famous ass. No wonder why House would never shut up about it...
They came through Cuddy's paneled glass doors after she gave her secretary instructions not to let anybody in until Dr. Chase left. She dropped off the files on top of her already crowded desk as Chase sat down on the little sofa she had in the corner next to the door. Once she finished up over there, she sauntered over and took a seat beside him.
"So what happened?" she leant back.
He leant back as well and crossed his arms, licking his lips and trying to get fluid to start juicing in his dry mouth. Cuddy tried not to watch his tongue caress his mouth, but she couldn't help herself. House did it a whole lot more seductively, but, whatever.
"Cameron..." he said in a small voice.
"What did she do?" she prodded.
"I told her that I wanted to start working for House again, and she doesn't. She wants to go somewhere far away from here. She wanted me to go with her, but I said I wanted to stay here. So...it's over." he let it all out.
Cuddy sat there before the shock of it registered. "Oh God, I'm sorry. Wait, if she's leaving , how come I don't have her resignation papers yet?"
He shrugged. "I think she was going to give them in today."
She sighed. "What a shame. She was one of the best female doctors we've had here in awhile. Always made sure that budget reports were handed in, tests were signed off on..." she looked at Chase, who was staring into his lap, twiddling his fingers.
Cuddy rested a reassuring hand on his shoulder. A very muscular shoulder.
"There's plenty more fish in the sea." she smiled.
"I guess. But this fish was a rare species that I don't know if I can find again." he said sadly.
"Everybody says that, honey. They think they'll never find someone else after things go sour with their relationship. But, they'll realize that life has its ups and downs, and rough patches are guaranteed. And when they least expect it, they find someone new."
"Yeah." he said, and let out a loud sigh before he let loose a small smile. "My life isn't over."
Cuddy smiled. "Glad to hear you're a little better."
"Alright, Cuddy. House has probably sent out a search party by now. He's going to badger me about where I was."
"Let's just say I needed a consult." she winked.
He stood up and fixed his lab coat. "Thank you, Cuddy. What you've just done really made me feel better."
She stood up also and went over to him. "Anytime. If you need me again, I'm either here or home." she smiled.
He quickly gave her a peck on the cheek and left. Cuddy just stood there in shock.
"Why the hell did I do that?" he mumbled to himself as he stepped into the elevator. "She's my boss!" And Allison was your colleague...you sure had no problems kissing her.
He mentally kicked himself for thinking about her. Divorcing somebody you still love isn't easy.
6 PM, about 3 days later...
Lisa Cuddy was in a horrible mood. She had a horrible day. It all started when she woke up late, which made her rush to get ready. She slipped getting out of the shower, producing a lovely bruise on her thigh. After that, she tried to put in her contacts, but they somehow dried out and the lens solution wasn't rehydrating them, which meant she had to wear her glasses to work. Once she got to the hospital, she had to deal with House's insanity, as usual, but there were also series of meetings and it was the day to go to the children's cancer ward. That already got her worked up whenever she was there.
She spilt coffee all over her blouse when she stumbled over a chair in the cafeteria, letting her bra show through her thin top. All the male doctors were practically drawling at her as she tried to get back to her office to change her shirt. It was embarrassing, and was the last thing she needed. They were all probably jerking off to that sight once they got home. Then, to put the cherry on top, she caught wind of a very sick baby that was just born. She made a trip to maternity to see if she could do anything to help him get better (knowing her with anything that has to do with babies). The baby ended up not making it, dying right in front of her. She had the paddles and kept shocking him, but House somehow learned that she was up there and he came in and pulled her away.
He actually was more human than usual today and comforted her before she bolted into her office, grabbed her things, and ended up where she was now: bawling her eyes out in her car in the parking garage. She had no idea why she didn't leave as to retain some part of her dignity instead of just losing it mere meters away from her entire life.
Chase was walking down the stairs of the parking garage that led to the lobby. That is where he happened to park that day. He stopped for a second, mildly feeling odd about something. He walked by the Clinic about half an hour ago and saw that it appeared that Cuddy had left for the night. But, her car was still in her designated parking spot, as he saw now. Ever so curious, he slowly came up to Cuddy's car.
She was inside, clutching the steering wheel hard, her head tilted towards her lap. He saw her body racking with sobs. She glanced up, not seeing him. His heart panged when he realized she was crying.
"Cuddy?" he called. She looked up fully upon hearing the muffled call.
"Chase? What are you doing?"
"Uh, I was going home, that is until I realized your car was still here when you obviously weren't in the hospital."
She sighed. "I'm fine. I just had to think some things over."
He rose a brow. "And it required crying?"
She looked at him and just burst into tears again. "I had the shittiest day you could ever imagine."
He went around and got into her car on the other side. "Was this about that baby that died?"
"That's only part of it. I woke up late, slipped in the shower, had to wear glasses, and you saw that fiasco in the cafeteria."
He lay a reassuring hand on her back. "You'll survive."
She took a breath. "I need a big favor from you."
"Um...what is it?"
She took a deeper breath. "Will you sleep with me?"
Chase blinked a few times and rubbed out his ears. "I beg your pardon?"
"Will you sleep with me?" she asked again.
His jaw dropped. "Are you high? You're my boss! And I'm younger than you! And-"
"I don't care about any of that. It'll be a one night stand. We're both feeling crappy, it'll do us some good. Nobody will have to know. It'll be one time, and we'll just forget it even happened."
He just sat there with the most priceless expression on his face.
"I'm still technically married! What if she changes her mind and I'm over here having a lay with the boss? What if-"
Cuddy propelled herself onto him, pressing her lips against his, silencing his protests. He sat there in shock before his senses sank in and he kissed back. She pulled herself onto his lap, straddling his crotch, her hands raising to tangle themselves in his golden waves. Whatever rationalization still screaming in his brain to cut this off was instantly swept away when she began to grind into him, his cock twitching up against the material of the scrubs he should've taken off after surgery 3 hours ago.
Meanwhile, one certain lanky diagnostician lurked in the shadows, gaping at the scene unfolding before him in Cuddy's car. He had been standing there since he secretly followed her out of the hospital when she left, witnessing her sob her heart out. He was debating whether or not he would go over there and comfort her, and decided he was, until Chase made his appearance.
Cuddy had finally slid off his lap, jamming her keys into the ignition and peeling out of the parking garage. House knew they were going to her place. Jealousy running through his veins, he clicked his cane into the slot on his bike, threw on his helmet and pursued his horny colleagues.
[H] [H] [H] [H] [H]
Chase grunted as Cuddy straddled him on her bed. His jacket had been ripped off in the process of stumbling through her home to reach the bedroom. She kissed him furiously as she yanked his blue scrubs from his body, coming face to face with a white long sleeved t-shirt and the grey, almost corduroy pants he'd come into work wearing this morning. He pulled off her top, revealing a rather promising purple bra. He nuzzled his face between her breasts, rubbing his face back and forth, his smooth complexion heating up her skin. For a brief second, Cuddy thought of what it would feel like if House was there instead, rubbing his thick stubble all over her chest. She felt a bolt of pleasure add onto the already burning pool of heat between her legs.
They finally ridded each other of all clothing, and proceeded to shag each other senseless, when all of a sudden a dark figure appeared in Cuddy's window. Chase didn't seem to notice, and continued his ministrations to Cuddy, who was silently scared shitless...pleasure and horror combined was an interesting feeling.
The figure became clearer as it came into focus, and Cuddy's eyes nearly fell out of her head (due to that and the fact that Chase, who smartly utilized a condom, was ramming into her). The two of them finally came, falling off their high. He was about to initiate a round two when Cuddy stood up, shaking as she mumbled her hasty retreat to go use the bathroom, wrapping a sheet around her in the process. She stepped out into the hall, and well hidden, peeked back into the room, the expression on her face jumbled with anger, lust, and whatever other feelings stirred within her when she finally saw who was in her window.
It was House. As she focused on him clearer, she squeezed her eyes shut and pressed her thighs together to suppress the lust and anger cascading through her.
He was completely ingloriously naked. Butt naked. Not even a scrap of cloth to cover his...breathtaking assets. She stormed to her front door and ran around back (wearing nothing but a bed sheet) to her bedroom window and hissed up at him.
"House? What the fuck?"
He spun around, the jealousy and anger evident in his cold stare. He retreated from it and turned around to face her, his dick bobbing with every hobbled step. Her breath hitched, and the lust quickly changed to anger.
"I should be asking the same thing, Doctor Sluttypants." he growled.
"Why you little son of a bitch!" she yelled quietly as to not disrupt her neighbors, but loud enough to show how furious she was. She lunged at him, and he out stepped her and made a run...er...hobbled limp for it. She chased after him, her sheet fluttering behind her in the evening breeze.
Chase, who was wondering what the hell was taking Cuddy so long, stood up and looked out her bedroom window to look into the starry night. His mouth went slack, his eyes popping at the uncalled for spectacle below him, completely not expecting anything of that nature. He rubbed his eyes...nope, he wasn't hallucinating or dreaming.
House was naked running around Cuddy's yard. He saw Cuddy flailing after him, the sheet wrapped around her frame becoming looser. Chase, realizing that he'd just slept with his boss, and seeing his other one completely naked, redressed and made a hasty retreat...he'd made enough stupid decisions...tonight never should have happened. He found a pen and eyed the room for something to write on, settling for an envelope on the top of a pile of mail. He scribbled an apology and ran for his life.
House had stopped running briefly to rest his leg, but Cuddy kept going. Once he felt he was strong enough, it was him who ended up chasing her. They were too far apart to realize who was chasing who anymore. Cuddy turned around and went in the opposite direction in a huff, fury flowing through her veins. House was running towards her, and they bashed into each other, but remained upright. House immediately crashed his lips into hers, and she was about to angrily whoop his ass until that happened. She melted into him and moaned loud, the sheet falling from her body. His dick hardened, and, oh boy, could she feel it. Chase's was nothing compared to that...oh shit. Chase. She forgot.. But she wanted sex with House right now.
"We have to find a way to get rid of Chase." she panted.
They went in the house through the back door, and went upstairs.
"Stay in the bathroom until I tell you to come." she instructed.
He feigned a shocked face. "You're not going to let me come? With the size of this erection, that's going to present a challenge."
She sighed, casting a glare and rolling her eyes. "Jack off, do something to occupy yourself."
"Why the hell would I jack off when there's a smokin' sexy lady 5 feet in front of me?"
"Oh shut up and wait here until I give you an okay. Once it's safe, you can have your way with me."
He smirked. "Yes mistress."
She shut the door and came into an empty bedroom, her eyes settling on an envelope resting on the edge of the bed. She picked it up, reading the note he scribbled onto it:
Cuddy, tonight was a huge mistake. Both of us were vulnerable and caught off guard. I'm sorry for suddenly leaving. I did catch a glimpse of the fiasco in your yard, and I couldn't bear to see what would become of that. I assure you nothing that happened tonight will ever leak out...this never happened. What happened stays between us and House...if he keeps his mouth shut. Sleeping with my boss is not one of the smartest things I've done. Please forgive me. I forgive you for your actions in the car...like I said, none of this ever happened. I'm sorry. -Chase
She smiled sadly. She forgave him. And it was a mistake...he was so much younger than she was. She was going to talk to him tomorrow to get this all straightened out and to get rid of the awkwardness.
"House, it's safe." she called, smirking.
He bolted into the room and speared her onto the bed, and the two of them had hard, fast, frenzied sex for hours, the events from earlier that night just a blank page in history.
Well there ya have it. I told you it was insane. It's not my exact dream as it actually was, but Cuddy sleeping with Chase and House showing up naked and Cuddy chasing him around the yard in her sheet were all figments of my screwed up brain. The whole ending with Chase running and leaving a note I made up, because the dream stopped right when Cuddy said we have to get rid of Chase...I couldn't leave it at that. I apologize for posting a one shot when I should be working on TBPOE...I have a CIP (chapter in progress). The only problem was that the site wasn't saving it so I copied and pasted it onto Word so I wouldn't lose it...which I was on my parents desktop at the time (the little square with your name on it you click to sign into when you turn on the computer)...because I didn't want to log out and waste time going on mine...so now I can't access it until one of them goes onto their desktop...so I'm waiting for that because I am NOT retyping that...I don't have the patience for it LOL. Ok. Enough with the unwanted crap. Reviews make me happy and increase my urge to write! Oh, and the sex between Cuddy and Chase...my dream never detailed it, so it was just sex. So I made up some sex to fill in for the description...if you are understanding at all what I'm saying. LOL. Reveiws please!