*please note: this was written in 1999, so please excuse Bill Clinton, Sadam Hussein, and Backstreet Boys jokes which you may find outdated. Most of these characters were not created by me. However, the plot is, so if you take it, I'll find you and kill you so hard, you'll die! (this is an idle threat intended as a joke! don't arrest me!).
The Babe Chronicles
After the huge, embarrassing failure of Babe: Pig in the City,we've decided it was time to make the talking pig a little more... "mature." Someone eventually came up with the idea for an massive ,epic story, and thus begins The Chronicles of Babe...
Babe 3: Adventures in the Lab
When this episode opens, we find that Farmer Hogget has finally decided to get with the times, and sold Babe to a nearby laboratory for money to buy a new computer. Hearing this, Ferdinand the Duck decides to rescue Babe (he WAS the lucky pig, after all). He assembles a strike force consisting of himself, a few chickens, the dog, Fly, and the cow. The team successfully infiltrates the lab (with heavy poultry casualties) to find they were too late: Babe is in five separate jars of preservative fluid, each on a different shelf. Rest in peace, talking Pig.
Babe 4: The Return
In this episode, Babe is reincarnated in the form of his son, BaaBabe, who is a sheep-pig hybrid (apparently Babe was getting a little too friendly with the sheep before he left). Meanwhile, a temporal rift pulls the three singing mice and the Cat back in time, where they are drafted into the Confederate army.
Babe 5:
Sadly, one of the mice is shot, straight to the belly. Realizing they can't go on as "The Three Singing Mice" with only two mice, they allow the cat to join the group in their fallen comrade's place. Meanwhile, back in the present, Ferdinand discovers a secret plot to resurrect the Soviet Union, and the President (having heard of his strike force's brave efforts in Babe 3) asks him to go to Russia and stop it.
Babe 6
Ferdinand's plane is delayed in England, where he decides to help some incompetent firefighters rescue a kitten from a tree. Another temporal rift sends the mice (including the cat) to the year 19,999. we are also introduced to an evil-looking, bearded shadowy four-legged silhouette, who is someplace we do not know about (yet).
Babe 7
The mice decide not to risk another temporal rift, and decide to save up to buy a time machine by singing. Some people walk by while others toss $10,000 coins into their hat. In the present, Ferdinand's plane is shot down by a cruise missile just before entering Russian airspace (coincidence? I think not). BaaBabe asks his mother, the sheep, who his father was, and she tells him that Sheepigs don't have fathers.
Babe 8
Ferdinand and his team must trek to Russia through the middle east on foot. In Iraq, they are arrested by Sadam Hussein. BaaBabe, upset that he doesn't have a father, decides to set out to find one. The mice finally save up their money, buy a time machine, and return to their proper time.
Babe 9:
The sheep begs BaaBabe not to go, but he leaves in the middle of the night, promising never to return without a father. The evil shadowy figure gives us evidence that he may be a pig (the pink rump and curly tail shown briefly in the light) as he informs us of his plan to wipe out all that is good and decent from the multiverse. Ferdinand and his team come up with a plan to escape from jail.
Babe 10
Ferdinand's team begins its elaborate escape plan. All did not go well, as Fly, the dog, was captured. As she was taken to be interrogated, Ferdinand was forced to kill her so she would not reveal the team's plan. Meanwhile, Sheep finds out that BaaBabe left, and races to catch up with him. We are also introduced to a new animal on the farm, Cluck Everlasting, an immortal, prophet-chicken who is awaiting the 'final fate.'
Babe 11
Ferdinand's group finally fight their way to Moscow, where they find the locals are being subjugated by a being who calls himself "The Virus." A shopkeeper informs them that The Virus lives on the Internet, and can only be defeated there. Ferdinand hatches a plan. Sheep catches up with BaaBabe and tells him to come back and to enter the Sheep herding contest, the proud tradition of the farm. BaaBabe can't figure out why he would ever want to do such a thing.
Babe 12
Ferdinand returns to the farm, and borrows the mice's time machine. He goes to back to the year 19,999, and gets an InternetInterface. He returns to 1999, and prepares to do battle with The Virus. In order to escape Sheep, BaaBabe is forced to push her off a cliff.
Babe 13
We find out now that the shadowy figure is indeed a pig, from an alternate universe, an EVIL universe. In fact, it's Evil Babe! He survived Evil Episode 3! He plans on invading the Normal Universe and taking it over. Ferdinand interfaces with the Internet and discovers that The Virus is none other than.....Farmer Hogget! When he discovers that he has been discovered, Hogget logs off. Ferdinand contacts the President and informs him of the situation.
Babe 14
SWAT Teams storm the farm, only to find Mrs. Hogget hacked into bitty pieces in the trough, and Mr. Hogget gone. Ferdinand, on his way back to America, is contacted telepathically by the ghost of Fly, who tells him that Hogget is on his way to Washington to assassinate the President.
Babe 15
Ferdinand arrives in Washington to rescue the President. He encounters the Farmer, and prepares for the ultimate battle. Evil Babe crosses the thresh hold into our universe. Back on the farm, Cluck, who refuses to tell anyone what the "final fate' is, rescues the cat from an assassination attempt by a, shadowy, familiar looking sniper.
Babe 16
The battle between Ferdinand and Hogget begins. At first, it seems the brave duck will have an easy victory, but then, Evil Babe shows up, and possesses the Farmer's body, giving him ultra strength. With this newfound power, Hogget whoops Ferdinand's ass and leaves him for dead. Evil Babe runs off as the President gets shot by the farmer, who, in turn gets shot by the President's whore, who, in turn, gets shot by the President's wife, who, in turn, gets shot by a drunken pizza delivery boy.
Babe 17
Evil Babe uses his power to launch a nuclear missile at Washington DC We learn that the sniper from episode 15 is none other than...the third mouse (who got shot back in episode 5). Apparently, a temporal rift took his body into the future, where some kid healed him and turned him into a cyborg for a science project. Now the mouse is pissed at his former comrades for replacing him so quickly.
Babe 18
Having nuked Washington, Evil Babe sets out for his next Evil Deed. He comes across BaaBabe, who immediately asks him to be his father. Evil Babe laughs, and tells BaaBabe that his father was indeed Babe, the legendary talking pig. As Evil Babe goes off, BaaBabe realizes he must return to the farm and carry on the proud family tradition of winning Sheep herding contests.
Babe 19
Evil Babe reassembles the Nazi regime and declares himself the leader of the Fourth Reich. He orders the construction of a million billion atomic bombs. BaaBabe returns to the farm, and immediately enters the Sheep herding contest. Cybor-Mouse begins his attack on his former friends.
Babe 20:
Just as Evil Babe orders the deployment of his atomic weapons, Ferdinand appears to stop him. Apparently, the nuclear blast some how mutated him into a 'super duck.' A great battle begins. The mice, realizing they have no chance of beating their super powered friend, use the time machine to go into the future to transform themselves into cyborgs. After the transformation, a surprise attack from the original Cybor mouse (apparently he is immortal and has waited all these years for the mice to show up in the future.) leaves Cybor Cat's body shattered (and yes, he is thoroughly dead, so he won't be coming to the rescue later). Another battle begins. BaaBabe enters the Sheep herding Arena.
Babe 21
As BaaBabe stands there in the field, images and Deja Vu flood his mind. These images trigger some lost memory, and BaaBabe remembers a past life...the life of Babe! Now with all the experience of his father/himself, BaaBabe/Babe begins the contest, filled with confidence. But the contest has changed since BaaBabe/Babe's previous life. The sheep are genetically altered to fly and have fire breath. BaaBabe/Babe soon becomes bacon.. (He is thoroughly dead, too).
Babe 22
The war in the future rages on. The two mice are strong fighters, but even with their combined cyborg strength, they are no match for the original cyber-mouse, who has more experience. Massive casualties are reported the future world over, as the mice unleash their weapons of mass destruction on one another. The battle in the present heats up as Ferdinand manages to steal a thousand nuclear missiles and hit Evil Babe with them. Evil Babe is destroyed, but the huge radiation levels open up a portal to another world, and a shadowy figure zooms out at super speed. Ferdinand realizes the portal leads to the Evil Universe, and decides it is his duty to go through...
Babe 23:
It turns out that the shadowy figure who rushed out of the portal was Evil Cluck Everlasting, entering to face Cluck in the 'final fate,' a duel between two immortal superpowers. Ferdinand summons up all his strength in an effort to destroy the Evil universe. The mice see all the damage they have done to the future, and realize they can settle their differences in a more civilized way...the biggest battle of the bands ever to rock the Earth!
Babe 24: The Battle of the Bands
Hundreds of groups in the future sign up for the battle of the bands, including the Cybor Mouse and the Cybor Mouse Duet, who battle through all the others to the finals. Then, in a colossal showdown, they play so loud and long, their music shakes the earth apart. In the present, Cluck and Evil Cluck begin their battle.
Babe 25: The End of a Saga
As Ferdinand's efforts to collapse the Evil universe begin to take effect, Cluck and his evil counterpart continue to ravage the planet in their attempts to kill one another. The battle eventually finds its way to the portal to the Evil universe, and Cluck and Evil Cluck slip inside as they struggle with each other. This happens just as the Evil universe collapses, and Ferdinand uses his super duck speed and escapes. No sign of either Clucks.
Thus ends The Babe Chronicles. We estimate that this will take some 218 years to complete. Ferdinand, out of all the characters, was the only character to survive, and will thus be the star of our next motion picture franchise...
Preview-teaser:
The world is in ruins, and the United States is in desperate need of a President. Since the entire Republican party was wiped out in a series of wars, the Democrats seem to have an easy victory. Only one creature is brave enough to stand up to the would-be tyrants....
****Ferdinand the Duck**** ****Al Gore****
***With music by: The Backstreet Geezers***
THE FERDINAND SAGA
ADVENTURES IN POLITICS
The Babe Chronicles
After the huge, embarrassing failure of Babe: Pig in the City,we've decided it was time to make the talking pig a little more... "mature." Someone eventually came up with the idea for an massive ,epic story, and thus begins The Chronicles of Babe...
Babe 3: Adventures in the Lab
When this episode opens, we find that Farmer Hogget has finally decided to get with the times, and sold Babe to a nearby laboratory for money to buy a new computer. Hearing this, Ferdinand the Duck decides to rescue Babe (he WAS the lucky pig, after all). He assembles a strike force consisting of himself, a few chickens, the dog, Fly, and the cow. The team successfully infiltrates the lab (with heavy poultry casualties) to find they were too late: Babe is in five separate jars of preservative fluid, each on a different shelf. Rest in peace, talking Pig.
Babe 4: The Return
In this episode, Babe is reincarnated in the form of his son, BaaBabe, who is a sheep-pig hybrid (apparently Babe was getting a little too friendly with the sheep before he left). Meanwhile, a temporal rift pulls the three singing mice and the Cat back in time, where they are drafted into the Confederate army.
Babe 5:
Sadly, one of the mice is shot, straight to the belly. Realizing they can't go on as "The Three Singing Mice" with only two mice, they allow the cat to join the group in their fallen comrade's place. Meanwhile, back in the present, Ferdinand discovers a secret plot to resurrect the Soviet Union, and the President (having heard of his strike force's brave efforts in Babe 3) asks him to go to Russia and stop it.
Babe 6
Ferdinand's plane is delayed in England, where he decides to help some incompetent firefighters rescue a kitten from a tree. Another temporal rift sends the mice (including the cat) to the year 19,999. we are also introduced to an evil-looking, bearded shadowy four-legged silhouette, who is someplace we do not know about (yet).
Babe 7
The mice decide not to risk another temporal rift, and decide to save up to buy a time machine by singing. Some people walk by while others toss $10,000 coins into their hat. In the present, Ferdinand's plane is shot down by a cruise missile just before entering Russian airspace (coincidence? I think not). BaaBabe asks his mother, the sheep, who his father was, and she tells him that Sheepigs don't have fathers.
Babe 8
Ferdinand and his team must trek to Russia through the middle east on foot. In Iraq, they are arrested by Sadam Hussein. BaaBabe, upset that he doesn't have a father, decides to set out to find one. The mice finally save up their money, buy a time machine, and return to their proper time.
Babe 9:
The sheep begs BaaBabe not to go, but he leaves in the middle of the night, promising never to return without a father. The evil shadowy figure gives us evidence that he may be a pig (the pink rump and curly tail shown briefly in the light) as he informs us of his plan to wipe out all that is good and decent from the multiverse. Ferdinand and his team come up with a plan to escape from jail.
Babe 10
Ferdinand's team begins its elaborate escape plan. All did not go well, as Fly, the dog, was captured. As she was taken to be interrogated, Ferdinand was forced to kill her so she would not reveal the team's plan. Meanwhile, Sheep finds out that BaaBabe left, and races to catch up with him. We are also introduced to a new animal on the farm, Cluck Everlasting, an immortal, prophet-chicken who is awaiting the 'final fate.'
Babe 11
Ferdinand's group finally fight their way to Moscow, where they find the locals are being subjugated by a being who calls himself "The Virus." A shopkeeper informs them that The Virus lives on the Internet, and can only be defeated there. Ferdinand hatches a plan. Sheep catches up with BaaBabe and tells him to come back and to enter the Sheep herding contest, the proud tradition of the farm. BaaBabe can't figure out why he would ever want to do such a thing.
Babe 12
Ferdinand returns to the farm, and borrows the mice's time machine. He goes to back to the year 19,999, and gets an InternetInterface. He returns to 1999, and prepares to do battle with The Virus. In order to escape Sheep, BaaBabe is forced to push her off a cliff.
Babe 13
We find out now that the shadowy figure is indeed a pig, from an alternate universe, an EVIL universe. In fact, it's Evil Babe! He survived Evil Episode 3! He plans on invading the Normal Universe and taking it over. Ferdinand interfaces with the Internet and discovers that The Virus is none other than.....Farmer Hogget! When he discovers that he has been discovered, Hogget logs off. Ferdinand contacts the President and informs him of the situation.
Babe 14
SWAT Teams storm the farm, only to find Mrs. Hogget hacked into bitty pieces in the trough, and Mr. Hogget gone. Ferdinand, on his way back to America, is contacted telepathically by the ghost of Fly, who tells him that Hogget is on his way to Washington to assassinate the President.
Babe 15
Ferdinand arrives in Washington to rescue the President. He encounters the Farmer, and prepares for the ultimate battle. Evil Babe crosses the thresh hold into our universe. Back on the farm, Cluck, who refuses to tell anyone what the "final fate' is, rescues the cat from an assassination attempt by a, shadowy, familiar looking sniper.
Babe 16
The battle between Ferdinand and Hogget begins. At first, it seems the brave duck will have an easy victory, but then, Evil Babe shows up, and possesses the Farmer's body, giving him ultra strength. With this newfound power, Hogget whoops Ferdinand's ass and leaves him for dead. Evil Babe runs off as the President gets shot by the farmer, who, in turn gets shot by the President's whore, who, in turn, gets shot by the President's wife, who, in turn, gets shot by a drunken pizza delivery boy.
Babe 17
Evil Babe uses his power to launch a nuclear missile at Washington DC We learn that the sniper from episode 15 is none other than...the third mouse (who got shot back in episode 5). Apparently, a temporal rift took his body into the future, where some kid healed him and turned him into a cyborg for a science project. Now the mouse is pissed at his former comrades for replacing him so quickly.
Babe 18
Having nuked Washington, Evil Babe sets out for his next Evil Deed. He comes across BaaBabe, who immediately asks him to be his father. Evil Babe laughs, and tells BaaBabe that his father was indeed Babe, the legendary talking pig. As Evil Babe goes off, BaaBabe realizes he must return to the farm and carry on the proud family tradition of winning Sheep herding contests.
Babe 19
Evil Babe reassembles the Nazi regime and declares himself the leader of the Fourth Reich. He orders the construction of a million billion atomic bombs. BaaBabe returns to the farm, and immediately enters the Sheep herding contest. Cybor-Mouse begins his attack on his former friends.
Babe 20:
Just as Evil Babe orders the deployment of his atomic weapons, Ferdinand appears to stop him. Apparently, the nuclear blast some how mutated him into a 'super duck.' A great battle begins. The mice, realizing they have no chance of beating their super powered friend, use the time machine to go into the future to transform themselves into cyborgs. After the transformation, a surprise attack from the original Cybor mouse (apparently he is immortal and has waited all these years for the mice to show up in the future.) leaves Cybor Cat's body shattered (and yes, he is thoroughly dead, so he won't be coming to the rescue later). Another battle begins. BaaBabe enters the Sheep herding Arena.
Babe 21
As BaaBabe stands there in the field, images and Deja Vu flood his mind. These images trigger some lost memory, and BaaBabe remembers a past life...the life of Babe! Now with all the experience of his father/himself, BaaBabe/Babe begins the contest, filled with confidence. But the contest has changed since BaaBabe/Babe's previous life. The sheep are genetically altered to fly and have fire breath. BaaBabe/Babe soon becomes bacon.. (He is thoroughly dead, too).
Babe 22
The war in the future rages on. The two mice are strong fighters, but even with their combined cyborg strength, they are no match for the original cyber-mouse, who has more experience. Massive casualties are reported the future world over, as the mice unleash their weapons of mass destruction on one another. The battle in the present heats up as Ferdinand manages to steal a thousand nuclear missiles and hit Evil Babe with them. Evil Babe is destroyed, but the huge radiation levels open up a portal to another world, and a shadowy figure zooms out at super speed. Ferdinand realizes the portal leads to the Evil Universe, and decides it is his duty to go through...
Babe 23:
It turns out that the shadowy figure who rushed out of the portal was Evil Cluck Everlasting, entering to face Cluck in the 'final fate,' a duel between two immortal superpowers. Ferdinand summons up all his strength in an effort to destroy the Evil universe. The mice see all the damage they have done to the future, and realize they can settle their differences in a more civilized way...the biggest battle of the bands ever to rock the Earth!
Babe 24: The Battle of the Bands
Hundreds of groups in the future sign up for the battle of the bands, including the Cybor Mouse and the Cybor Mouse Duet, who battle through all the others to the finals. Then, in a colossal showdown, they play so loud and long, their music shakes the earth apart. In the present, Cluck and Evil Cluck begin their battle.
Babe 25: The End of a Saga
As Ferdinand's efforts to collapse the Evil universe begin to take effect, Cluck and his evil counterpart continue to ravage the planet in their attempts to kill one another. The battle eventually finds its way to the portal to the Evil universe, and Cluck and Evil Cluck slip inside as they struggle with each other. This happens just as the Evil universe collapses, and Ferdinand uses his super duck speed and escapes. No sign of either Clucks.
Thus ends The Babe Chronicles. We estimate that this will take some 218 years to complete. Ferdinand, out of all the characters, was the only character to survive, and will thus be the star of our next motion picture franchise...
Preview-teaser:
The world is in ruins, and the United States is in desperate need of a President. Since the entire Republican party was wiped out in a series of wars, the Democrats seem to have an easy victory. Only one creature is brave enough to stand up to the would-be tyrants....
****Ferdinand the Duck**** ****Al Gore****
***With music by: The Backstreet Geezers***
THE FERDINAND SAGA
ADVENTURES IN POLITICS