And before we begin here are some miscellaneous facts, a few that may even pertain to the matter at hand:
Whenever and wherever you're reading this, I'm probably lying on my bed listening to the sound of my own thoughts screaming at me in my head right now.
Monophobia is the fear of being alone.
The only reason i'm writing this is because i have art block.
Sadomasochism is defined as, "gratification, especially sexual, gained through inflicting or receiving pain; sadism and masochism combined."
Children cannot be trusted with knives.
Knives are bad.
Society is a human creation that promotes submission and conformity.
Soup is good food
Now it's up to up to you to decide which is relevant. Hope you enjoy.
Now onto our regularly scheduled programing.
Dipper's POV
"We're here, we're here, we're here!" Mabel shouts excitedly. Dipper peels his face off the of the passenger side window as his sister's car pulls up to the Mystery Shack. He blinks a few times and glances over at his twin. She is practically bouncing up and down in her seat, Waddles snorts excitedly in the back seat.
Dipper is pretty excited too. Gravity Falls was one of his favorite places in the world, with all its mysteries and secrets. He couldn't imagine spending his summer any way other than hunting elusive lake monsters and fighting off an army of gnomes every other day. Maybe this year he could even record some paranormal activity.
Mabel turns the key and they both jump out of the car. Dipper takes a deep breath of that clean mountain air, "finally" he exhales. His senior year had been a stressful one but it was finally over. He had been accepted into his first choice of college. He could finally relax.
Mable throws open the trunk of the car with enthusiasm. Dipper hauls their suitcases out of the car and they drag them up to the back door.
"Grunkle Stan! Grunkle Ford!" Mabel and Dipper yell in unison.
"Kids!" yells a familiar voice from somewhere.
"Children," says another familiar voice from the top of the stairs. Grunkle Ford strides down the stairs to greet them, "how was your school year?"
"Very rewarding," Dipper answers at the same times as Mabel groans, "Lame!"
Grunkle Ford chuckles, "well you two can put your bags upstairs and then you can tell us all about your year."
Dipper and Mabel cart their bags up to the to the attic room they know and love.
Dipper inhales the musty attic smell. It reminds him of all the wonderful times he had here, he's so glad to be back.
They tramp back downstairs and into the living room. They sit down on the carpet and Stan sits up and turns down the T.V.
He look just the same as he ever has, wearing the same filthy old wife beater and striped boxers.
Ford sits down with them as well and they begin telling their Grunkles about their year.
They spend the rest of the day catching up and settling in.
That night as Dipper drifts off to sleep he finally feels at peace.
The next morning Dipper wakes up early to take a walk. He exits the shack and steps out into the cool air.
Dipper strolls off into the woods down a path he knows well, the sun is barely up the warm red light is seeping through the gaps in the trees. He wanders further and thinks of all the weird, creepy shit he seen in these woods.
As Dipper ventures further he thinks the light seeping through the trees is getting darker. He glances up at the sky the warm red is reverting to the deep purple it had been before the sun risen. Dipper furrows his brow in interested confusion. He glances around, he's never been to this part of the woods. He stops, staring one eyed up at him is a mossy triangular stone. Dipper glances around and then back at the stone.
"What the hell," Dipper mutters, "Bill?"
Dipper circles the half submerged slab of stone.
"Man, you've really let yourself go," Dipper laughs. He turns to leave but a chill shoots his spine as an all too familiar voice cackles from the trees around him.
"It's true, I have, living in the woods really does that to a guy."
Dipper swings around, his jaw drops.
"I haven't left this clearing in years, I'm bored out of my freaking mindscape," the voice cackles, a tall lanky figure steps out into the dim light. A mop of bleach blonde hair hangs over one of his eyes, the other one is wide and yellow with cat-like slits for it's pupil. His dark chocolatey brown skin would have been invisible against the dark trees if it hadn't been for his vibrant yellow dress shirt and his glowing eye.
"You? But you're," Dipper starts.
"Dead?" Bill laughs.
"Human," Dipper finishes.
"Oh, haha, this old thing, because of you and your sister I'm not as powerful as I used to be. This is the best I could do in my predicament. I've gotta say though, I'm quite attractive for one of you pathetic life forms," Bill says with a wide grin.
"But,"dipper starts again. Bill takes a few more steps toward dipper. Dipper steps backward, scowling. "But why haven't I seen you since I was twelve?"
"Oh, I've been around, I've been keeping an eye on you," Bill takes another step, "still don't have a girlfriend, do you? Still pining for that Wendy chick?"
Dipper steps back again, "Why do you care?"
Bill laughs and takes another step forward, "I just want to catch up with an old friend, I haven't talked to anyone in years," his eye twitches a little.
Dipper steps back again, his back collides with the trunk of a tree. Bill shoots Dipper a nasty grin and slams against him.
"It's been so long Pine Tree, we've got so much catching up to do," Bill purrs.
Dipper grimaces in complete and utter disgust, "Dude get off."
"But i'm so lonely, please don't leave me alone out here. I haven't had physical contact with anything living in years. Please stay here, with me," Bill bats his eyelashes and firmly grabs Dipper's hips.
Dipper's look of disgust only grows more disgusted. He pushes Bill off of him, Bill crashes to the ground with a loud thump. Dipper stumbles away and turns to run away from the clearing. He doesn't look back, he doesn't want to unearth all the memories of of the trauma Bill had put him and his sister through all those years ago.
Dipper finally looks back to see if Bill is following him, the moment he turns his head he runs smack into something and falls backward. He looks up and sees Bill standing over him.
"Hey there doll face," Bill grins down at him, "Neat little trick ain't it. Got you all turned around and back into my clutches"
"Ah! Dude leave me alone," Dipper yells crawling backwards away from Bill.
Bill disappears with a loud pop and reappears behind Dipper. He hooks his clawed hands under Dipper's arms and lifts him up off the ground.
Dipper stumbles backward, "Dude don't touch me!" he yells.
"You know what really sucks about being human, all your stupid urges and instincts," Bill whines, "Stay with me so you can help me satisfy them." Bill bats his eyelashes and starts walking toward dipper again.
"You're fucking disgusting, let me leave," Dipper growls. Bill's evil grin only widens. He reaches out to grab dipper's face. Dipper pulls back his arm and with as much force as he can muster brings his fist crashing into Bill's face. Bill plummets to the grassy earth with a loud groan, it sounded almost lustful. A look of complete shock spread across his face. It obviously had never crossed his mind that dipper could ever fight back like that. Dipper had been taking self defence classes ever since he had met Bill for exactly this reason.
Bill sits up still looking shocked, "you hit me," he says looking utterly betrayed.
"Yeah, you're getting rapey, so I hit you," Dipper says simply.
Bill stands up, he looks kinda angry now. "I'm just trying to be friendly."
Dipper scowls at him, "Yeah, friendly," he says continuing to back up. Bill continues to walk towards him.
"Dude I told you to step off," Dipper growls. Bill continues toward him. Dipper pulls back his arm again and sinking it into Bill's gut. Bills visible eye flutters and he lets out a loud "oof." He clutches his stomach and falls to the ground again. Dipper gives him kick for good measure.
Bill lets out a shuddering exhale. Dipper turns to leave.
"Hey pine tree, bet you won't kick me again," Bill says challengingly.
Dipper swings around angrily, "why won't you leave me alone?"
"Kick me Dipper," Bill says looking pathetically up at Dipper, "Do it."
Dipper does, Bill wheezes. Dipper bends down to Bill's level, "sorry dude, you totally deserve it for all the shit you put me through," Dipper shrugs and then stands up again.
"Hey pine tree, can you just stay here a little longer. I promise I won't do anything I just don't know how long it'll be until I see another living being," Bill says sadly.
He looks completely pitiful curled on the ground. Dipper almost feels bad for him. Against his better judgment, he sits back down.
Bill immediately pounces on him, pinning his arms above his head and sitting on his stomach.
"Damn it!" Dipper yells.
"What ?" says Bill with a shrug, "this is how I deal with crippling loneliness."
Dipper struggles to free himself from Bill's grip.
"Did you really expect anything less of me," Bill muses. A sense of panic falls over Dipper. He struggles harder.
Bill bends over freeing Dippers midsection. Dipper immediately twists and throws Bill to the ground. Dipper assumes a similar position to the one Bill had been occupying above him a second ago.
"I'm not a sweaty awkward preteen that you can push around anymore," Dipper growls.
Bill grins up at him, "I guess you're right kid, looks like you're too grown up for my way, I can't overpower you to get what I want anymore. How about you do it your way."
Dipper scowls down at him, "What's that's supposed to mean?"
Bill bites his lip and reaches his hands up and places them on Dippers hips. Bill tries to pull dipper down onto him, Dipper doesn't let him.
"It means I want you on top," Bill says with a vague air of seduction in his voice.
Dippers lip curls in disgust, he tries to pull away from Bill but bill keeps a firm grip on Dipper's hips.
"Soliciting sex from a minor, that's a new low even for you Bill," dipper says glaring down at him.
"You're still a minor?" Bill groans disappointedly.
"Seventeen, technically still a teen," Dipper says.
"Oh well you'll be eighteen at the end of the summer so who cares, besides this body can't be that old can it? That's really all that matters, I mean look me," Bill says arrogantly, removing his hands from Dippers waist and unsnapping the buttons on his yellow shirt.
Dipper stops and swallows his retort as he looks down at the young man's exposed chest.
(He's having an anime-boy-sees-a-titty-and-gets-a-nosebleed moment lol)
Dipper is stares down at the perfect body positioned below him forgetting that he wanted to leave, not realizing that he was free from Bill's grasp, that Bill had let go of him. He had the insatiable urge to touch him. Dipper instantly regretted the thought. Couldn't Bill like read minds or something? Dipper pulled his gaze away from Bill's chest and back to his face, the look on it answered Dipper's question, that or Bill had read the expression of peaked interest on Dipper's face.
"Why can't you just jerk off, why do you have to rope me into your perverse fantasies?" Dipper says the anger in his voice a bit half-hearted, he had become caught up in scanning the flawless body beneath him, Bill was right, he was extremely attractive.
"Because it's been years, I'm so tired of doing it alone, I need to be with someone for once," Bill says in a more serious voice, "I wanna have some fun, I can't do anything in these woods."
Dipper sighs he bends down further bringing his face close to Bill's, he takes his hand and brushes it along bill's ebony skin. His skin is soft. He smiles sleepily up at Dipper.
Bill reaches up kissing Dipper gently, Dipper responds by biting Bill's lip.
"Ow," Bill says with a challenging smile, "so you're like that? Never would've pegged you as a sadist." He laughs lightly.
Dipper doesn't smile. He slips a hand under Bill's unbuttoned shirt, he pulls it off his arms leaving his beautiful chest exposed. Bill's eyelids flutter a little bit.
Dipper hesitates, he doesn't actually know what he's doing, he knows how of course, but he's never actually, done it.
Bill picks up on Dipper's hesitation, he sits up and gently pushes Dipper against the trunk of a tree. He kisses him again, more roughly this time. Dipper threads his fingers into Bill's hair and entangles his hand in Bill's of bleach blonde mop. He yanks his head backward. Bill makes a pathetic face and lets out a small gasp.
"So you're not talking, huh?" Bill says with a strained grin.
Dipper looks him in the eye, the edges of his mouth curl upward a little bit. He chuckles a bit. Then he relinquishes his grip on Bill's hair who immediately moves in to kiss Dipper again.
Dipper feels Bill's hands sliding under his shirt, as they break apart and Dipper grazes Bill's bottom lip with his teeth. Bill slides the shirt over Dipper's head. Dipper continues to stare absently at Bill. He's starting to rethink his decision to go along with Bill's fantasy. He seems like he might be reformed maybe a little bit but Dipper still doesn't trust him, who would after he had tried to take over the world. But, he was really intriguing to Dipper, there where so many things Dipper didn't know about him.
Bill reaches down and unzips dippers fly. Dipper feels like he's going to regret this but he lets Bill continue. Bill lowers his head into Dippers lap. Bill starts bobbing his head up and down, Dipper puts a hand on Bill's head and stares down at him in a bored sort of way. Some girl had once given him a blowjob at a high school party, she had been drunk and dipper didn't really like her but she still did better than Bill was. Dipper didn't blame him though he didn't seem like the type to be giving blowjobs, he was definitely one that would be a regular of the receiving end.
Still, Dipper looks down at him and says, "you can do better than that," flatly.
Bill glances up at him poutily, he looks almost hurt, but he does try to up his game. Dipper pets Bill's hair absentmindedly. Bill pauses to catch his breath and Dipper tips Bill's chin back with his thumb so he looks dipper in the face. Neither of them say anything. Then Bill pulls of his pants and climbs onto Dipper's lap. He thrusts Dipper into himself and gasps.
He chuckles lightly, "it went in really easy," he leans forward, "to tell you the truth I was playing with myself earlier." he pauses and then purrs, "I was thinking of you."
"Right, like I believe that," Dipper scoffs.
"But it's true," he purrs moving his hips slowly, "I mean you and your family were the last living beings I saw before you erased me and you're arguable the cutest member of your family so naturally I'd dwell on you."
Bill stares lustfully at Dipper, his breaths are short and sharp.
"At first I hated you," he continues grazing Dippers face with his claws, "I spent every waking moment thinking of all the things I could do to you. Mentally, physically, eventually the fantasies became more physical than anything. I thought up all sorts of things I wanted to do with you, after awhile they got really, unconventional if you know what I mean."
Dipper doesn't respond so Bill continues, "And I mean if you think about it, I deserve whatever you could ever imagine to do to 't that be nice, retribution for all I've done to you. Sweet sweet revenge," he bites his lip and smiles.
Dipper remains silent and stony-faced. Bill gazes at him slowly moving his hips up and down. Dipper mulls Bill's words over in his head as the demon bobs up and down, penetrating the silence with shuddering gasps.
Dipper locks eyes with Bill, Bill smiles, Dipper scowls. Suddenly Dipper pushes Bill off him and onto the ground then flips him over and thrusts into him.
"Dipper!" Bill yells, surprised. Dipper assumes it's because he's being rough.
"You said whatever I want, didn't you?" Dipper grunts, "besides I know you want to do the same to me don't you?"
"Ah, oh man," he gasps, "I never said I was complaining." he almost laughs but it sounds more like choked moan.
Dipper squeezes Bills hips, digging his fingernails into them.
"Fuck! Feels like you've got a lot of anger towards me," Bill moans clenching his fists in the dirt, "take it out on my ass," he growls.
Dipper slams into him harder and Bill shouts fuck again.
"Man pine tree, your pent up rage feels awesome," Bill gasps. He moves his hips in rhythm with Dippers. Dipper is annoyed at his enthusiasm.
"What are you, some sort of masochist?" Dipper says with a condescending laugh.
"You wouldn't think so wouldya?" Bill cuts himself off with a loud moan, "but I could definitely get used to this."
"But whadabout you?" Bill slurs, "this make up for all the childhood trauma," he asks jokingly.
Dipper stops moving and glares at the back of Bill's head.
"Aw don't stop," Bill whines.
Dipper flips him over and glares directly at his face. Bill's hair has slid off his face revealing his other eye. It looks normal relative to the wide, yellow, slit pupiled one, but the contrast was rather grotesque.
Bill smiles at Dipper, "you wanna see my face when you do me?"
"Not really now that i'm seeing it all, your eyes are fucked up something fierce," Dipper scoffs.
"Rude," Bill pouts.
"Whatever," Dipper thrust into him again.
"Oh!" Bill moans, surprised.
Dipper glares down at Bill. His eyes flutter in ecstasy, his lips are parted, he's making a pathetic face up at Dipper, needy and flustered.
"You feel so good pine tree," Bill moans.
Dipper glares at him, "why don't you shut up?" he snaps.
"But I mean it," he whines, "this is awesome."
"Jesus christ, shut up," Dipper growls, he reaches his hand around Bill's throat.
The needy expression on Bill's face is replaced by a shocked, scared look. He makes a sound like he's trying to speak. It comes across as a sputtering cough.
Dipper keeps moving, Bill looks like he might cry. The edges of Dipper's mouth curl upward. Dipper tightens his grip and tears start to stream from Bill's eyes.
"Aw, don't worry, it'll be over soon," Dipper coos mockingly.
Dipper feels Bill's body shudder violently and then relax and he lets go of Bill's neck as he cums as well.
Dipper looks down at Bill panting. Bill stares back at him gasping for breath.
A smile spreads across his tear-soaked face and between breaths Bill gasps, "that was… so fucking… amazing."
Dipper sits back leaning against the tree again. He tucks everything back into his pants and then zips them back up. He continues to stare at Bill, he's a mess.
Bill sits up and waves his hand nonchalantly clearing away the mess. He stands up and pulls his pants back on then he moves to sit beside Dipper. Dipper half-heartedly tries to shrug him off to no effect.
"Come on pine tree, you can't just shrug me off after that," Bill says, he still sounds like he's trying to catch his breath, "you can't deny that you liked it," he grins.
Dipper remains silent. He's a bit ashamed that he succumbed to Bill's relentless allurement, but at the same time he can't help but feel pride at how he made Bill cry.
"Not talking again?" Bill purrs, "strong silent type are you?"
Dipper shoots him an annoyed look, then suddenly he stands up. He doesn't like the way Bill makes him feel. What he did scares him, what he wants to do scares him even more.
"Wait, where are you going," Bill asks with a pouty frown.
"I'm leaving, I'm going back to the Mystery Shack. This was a mistake," Dipper says turning to go back the way he came.
"Wait!" Bill whines.
Dipper stops, clenches his fist and then starts walking quickly away.
"Please don't leave," Bill begs grabbing up his shirt and shoes and running after Dipper. He grabs Dipper's arm but Dipper yanks it away from him.
"If you care so much just follow me," Dipper snaps continuing away from the clearing.
"I can't leave the fucking clearing!" Bill yells. Dipper stops again.
"If you say I can come with you I can leave, but if you don't then I'm stuck here!" he shouts from the edge of the clearing.
"Well that explains it then, only reason you did this is so you can leave." Dipper says he starts to walk away again then Bill stops him again.
"No!" he yells, "no," he chokes sounding like he's on the verge of tears, "I don't wanna be here, you're right, but-" he pauses, "I'll stay with you I promise, just-," he pauses again, "Please don't leave me alone again."
Dipper clenches his fists, he wants to leave. Partly because he was scared of what he might do, partly because he wanted to make Bill cry again. He swallows then lets out a heavy exhale. He turns around to look back at Bill, at seeing his face Dipper turns back around. Why is this so hard? Why can't he just leave?
"Pine tree," Bill whines, Dipper can hear the sad smile in his voice. A desperate attempt to convince him to stay.
Dipper yells angrily, then turns on his heels and storms back toward Bill. Bill's face lights up for a second and then reverts to his typical condescending expression, as though he was trying to hide his excitement.
"I knew you'd co-," his sentence is stopped short by Dipper punching him in the gut again. He buckles and groans in pain. Dipper turns and marches away.
"Wait Dipper!"
"good bye Bill," he says and then he runs full speed back to the mystery shack before he can change his mind.
He finally stops when he's on the porch of the mystery shack. He pants, what has he done. What the fuck did he just do.
He goes inside and slams the door behind him.
"Dipper!" grunkle stan yells, "how many times I told you, don't slam that."
"Sorry, it was an accident," Dipper lies rushing up the stairs.
He locks himself in the bathroom and catches his breath. He looks at himself in the mirror, for some reason he barely recognizes his own face, "what's wrong with you?" he whispers to his reflection.
He runs the shower and strips off his clothes. He sits in the tub and lets the water run over him. Could he forget this? Does he want to forget it?
He's in the shower for a while, he may have even cried at one point. He can't tell.
When he finally gets out the waters cold and it's almost dinner. He sees Mabel in the hall as he's walking to their room.
"You were in there a while," Mabel, "you alright?"
"Yeah i'm fine," Dipper says dismissively.
"You sure?" Mabel asks with a concerned frown, "you look all weird."
"Mabel I'm just trying to get around telling you I was jerking off," Dipper lies.
"Oh, TMI, sorry" she says.
"That's why you shouldn't press me," Dipper says walking to their room.
"Sorry sorry, I wont do it again," she says and then goes downstairs.
Dipper lays down on his bed and stares at the ceiling. He doesn't know what to do, everything's fucked up. His dream of a peaceful summer is unimaginable now.
Some time later Mabel pops her head in to check up on him.
"You hungry, I made dinner?" she asks.
"Nah, I'm good, thanks, I think I'm just gonna go to bed," Dipper says looking over at her and giving her a half hearted smile.
"Okay, I'll put some aside for you if you get hungry," she says looking a bit relieved. The smile worked.
"Thank you."
She turns the light of as she leaves. Dipper drifts of to sleep hoping for the peace it normally brings, but his dreams are disturbed. He dreams of that morning when he had his hands around Bill's neck. In the dream when Bill's body shakes but Dipper doesn't let go. His hands squeeze tighter and he can't stop them. The tears stream down his face and he looks genuinely scared. His face is turning red.
"Stop it!" Dipper yells, "I don't want this, STOP IT!"
His hands don't stop. Bills eyes start to droop and his body goes limp. Dipper's hands finally let go.
"Oh no, oh fuck," Dipper says in a panic, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I didn't want this I'm so sorry!"
He stands up and stumbles backward. The trees are closing in on him, their branches reaching out for him, wrapping around, twisting around his neck, squeezing. He fumbles trying to get them off, they're too tight, he can't breathe. He gasps for air, there isn't any, hes gonna die…
He sits up in bed sweaty and panting. He looks around, it's dark outside, Mabel's asleep.
He throws his sheets off and crosses the room quietly so as to not wake Mabel. He rushes silently through the house and once he's outside he breaks into a sprint. He dashes through the trees, retracing his steps from this morning, everything looks different.
"Bill!" he yells. "Bill where are you!?"
Dipper is panicking, he doesn't even really know why, he just has to find him.
"Bill!" he screams, he can barely see two feet in front of himself, he keeps tripping on roots and rocks, he keeps going he doesn't care.
In the distance he sees a cold blue glow amongst the trees. He hadn't noticed it before but that morning it had more of a warm comforting yellow glow.
"Bill!" Dipper yells running as fast as he can to the clearing. "Bill!"
Dipper stops in the clearing Bill is lying next to the tree he'd pushed Dipper against earlier. His bodies shaking gently, he's crying. Dipper kneels down next to him. "Bill," he says quietly, "I'm sorry, I was wrong to leave you."
"You're not real, go away," Bill says, barely audible.
"Bill it's me, for real," dipper puts a hand on his shoulder, then he sees his forearm, "oh my god, Bill your arm," Dipper picks it up gently.
"No don't look," Bill yanks in away and hides it from Dippers view.
"Bill please," Dipper says sadly.
Bill sits up still holding his arm to his chest so Dipper can see it. Dipper wants to cry it's his fault. Seeing Bill cry wasn't worth it.
He doesn't cry, instead he rips the sleeves of his t-shirt.
"What are you doing?" Bill sniffs.
Dipper grabs his arm.
"Wait no I don't," Bill says trying to pull it back.
Dipper doesn't let him, he holds his arm and wraps the tattered cloth from his sleeves around Bills bloodied forearm, covering the deep gashes.
Bill starts to cry again, "I'm sorry."
Dipper grabs Bill and hugs him tightly to his chest, "Shut up, you didn't do anything to apologize for. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have left you, that was really fucked up, I dont know whats wrong with me."
"There's nothing wrong with you," Bill sniffles, "anyone- anyone in your position would've left."
"Doesn't mean I should've," Dipper says, hugging Bill tighter, "I won't do it again."
Bill clutches at the back of Dipper's t-shirt, "Thank you for coming back," he sobs into Dipper's shoulder.
"Yeah," Dipper whispers, he doesn't want to let go of Bill.
They sit in silence clinging to each other, Bills body shaking. Bills body eventually stops shaking and Dipper realizes he's cried himself to sleep. He can feels his eyes start to droop as well. He lays Bill down on the grass and lays beside him pulling him back close to him. Bill's back fits against his body like a puzzle piece. Dipper drifts asleep.
Oof what a ride, if you're new here you won't know the difference but if you're cummin back for seconds then you may notice a few differences in the story. Well I apologize if this has just thrown you off entirely, I had a revelation while re-reading my previous work ya see. I was thinking about if Dipper really had just up and left how would that go, and honestly it's so much better to see Dipper sprinting through the woods in the middle of the night, barefoot in his underwear desperately calling Bill's name, Panicking for reasons he himself doesn't know.
So sorry if you liked it better the first way, I do humbly apologize but I feel that this new version better fits in with the speed of their relationship and reinforces Bill's fear of being left behind and isolated. Tell me what you think my dear sweet readers and if any of you newbies are curious to read the previous version, Hit me up, I'll send it to ya so you can decide which you like better.
Thanks for fueling my obsession, see ya next time.