This wasn't supposed to happen. It wasn't supposed to end like this. Dean couldn't take it. There was too much blood, even for this all-powerful and unnatural being.
It had been a while now, since he had last returned to this place. The earth was slowly healing after the battle that had been fought. The final stand between Heaven and Hell. The earth had paid the price and had been drowned in human blood. The angels, for heaven had won and sent Lucifer back to Hell, had been repairing the damages to the entire Earth.
The war had been short, in comparison to human wars, but it had been a tough and hard fought war. And now Dean was back to where it all ended. In a blaze of glory, the 'good' guys won but it came with a price that Dean never liked to remember.
He tried not to go back to places that would remind him of his fallen comrade, his fallen friend, but the memories would find a way to the surface. It was hard the first few weeks after the final battle. Part of Dean still expected to turn around and see him just standing there in that same beige trench coat that he's worn since the first time they met face to face. And then Dean needed to remember that he'd never see those bright blue eyes looking back at him. He would never again get his annoying, unexpected visits that he had grown so accustomed to.
Sam tried talking to him, after it all happened, but Dean, being who he was, never wanted to talk about Castiel's death or what had caused it. Those memories were the hardest to over come. Dean knowing that he had had a hand in Castiel's death hurt much more then anything he had experienced in Hell. Everyone tried to tell Dean that he couldn't have done anything to safe Castiel but Dean always had his doubts.
"Cas, hold on man. We can get you some help ok, just keep your eyes open." Dean was almost in hysterics as he held the body of his guardian.
Castiel just looked up at Dean with those beautiful blue eyes, now filled with a great sadness, yet pride at what he had done. He had saved his charge and fulfilled his duties till his last breath. "Dean," he gasped out, "Don't be sad. This is my destiny. I was meant to do this. I have no regrets at all." A silent tear ran down Castiel's face. He knew this would cause Dean pain, for Castiel knew that he was important to Dean and that somehow they had formed a strong connection.
"Come on Cas, just hang on." Dean looked around for someone that might be able to help the bleeding angel but every one was busy battling each other. He turned back to Castiel. "You can't go. Angels can't die. And what if I fall back into Hell again, no one else but my guardian would be crazy enough to come save me." Dean had tears in his eyes now. He felt like he was loosing a part of himself.
And now he was back, willingly coming to a place that held so much pain. He's not exactly sure why he's back but he felt he needed to come. Somewhere in the back of his mind he knew he had come to honor all that had died exactly one year ago and he owed it to Castiel to thank him properly.
It didn't take him long to find the shrine that the angels had made in memory of all who fought to keep the world safe. It stood about four feet high and was made of what appeared to be crystal. The angels made it special; it would never break or corrode. It would remain in perfect condition no matter how much time had pasted.
Dean looked at what the angels had inscribed into its smooth surface.
"A reminder for those who lost their lives
Fighting something much bigger then themselves
To save the world from destruction.
We will never forget."
Dean hadn't really liked the monument. He didn't know why, he just thought it wasn't really enough for those who died. He wanted to tell the world about everything that had happened but he knew no one would believe him.
He slowly kneeled down in front of the monument. He touched the grass that was just starting to grow again and almost smiled. He didn't quite know what to say so he just started talking. "Hey there, Cas. I know that you probably can't hear me because if you where an angel again then you would have come and visited me right?" The words hung in the air for a moment before he continued. "Besides, I know you can't be an angel, not while I'm alive anyway. So hold on a little longer, my time here is almost up as well. I can feel it. I can't tell Sammy, it would hurt him to much, but he'll be fine, he's got Ruby to look after him now. And don't worry, he won't ever go darkside again."
Castiel placed his hand on Dean's cheek and Dean could feel a warmth spread through him. Suddenly, Castiels' hand emitted a bright, light blue light. Dean could feel the power surging through him and bit his lip to stop him from crying out. It wasn't exactly painful for Dean but it was a lot for his body to take in.
Castiels' hand rested back at his side and he let out a sigh of exhaustion. "It is done now. You will be protected." He said, smiling up at Dean.
Dean just blinked. Castiels' hand was gone but the warmth and power still remained, coursing through him. "What did you do?" Dean asked.
"I gave you a gift. I gave you my grace."
"I thought that was supposed to be painful and that you wouldn't be an angel after that." Dean said confusion in his eyes.
"That's only if you rip it out Dean. What I did was temporarily give you my grace. Angels are aloud to give it as a gift for a time if they feel the need of if they are no longer strong enough to carry out their duties. You will hold it inside of you until the day you die and then you will return it to me and become an angel of the Lord as well." Castiel explained as his eyes began to droop.
"Hey, stay awake. And what do you mean, "If they can't carry out their duties"? You're not dying here on this battle field! So wake up!" Dean said while shaking Castiel slightly.
"I feel I must be going now Dean. Remember, I'll always be with you even if you can't see me. Goodbye Dean Winchester." Castiel let out one last breath and his eyes closed, never to be opened again.
Dean closed his eyes as he remembered that day. All too clearly the memories flashed through his head. He hated this place because it made him remember and yet he never wanted to forget.
A tear slid down his face as he felt Castiel go limp in his arms. He looked around at everyone else that was fighting. Everything seemed to be slowed down immensely from what it should be. He could easily spot Sam fighting but couldn't make a move to help. Castile had been warning about this for all those months and yet he never listened. And now Castiel was the one who paid for it.
Dean could remember every detail of the blade Sam was using, a new one. Something he got as a gift especially for this final battle. A gift from the knife master himself, a gift from Alistair. With that gift he was ruthlessly killing the bodies of the angels and causing serious harm to them. The knife that was the perfect match for the hole that was in Castiels' stomach.
"Sam, what are you doing?!" Dean yelled above the noise of the battle raging around them. "How could you do this to the angels? To Castiel? He was our friend!"
Sam looked at Dean but could not really see him. His eyes were coated over with red and Dean imagined the crossroads demon. "No angel is my friend." Sam said in a voice that was not is own. "I will destroy them all and become supreme ruler of both domains!"
Dean couldn't take it anymore. His emotions were running way to high and he no longer cared about the battle at hand. No longer cared about the war. He didn't even care that his brother had become a meat suit for the all powerful Lucifer himself. He could no longer see anything around him but he could sense everything that was happening.
Every move the earth made he cold feel. The bodies of fallen friends and foes all around. And then the sudden movement of someone close to his position. Sam was on the move, coming straight for Dean.
He reacted on pure instinct and reached for the hand that held the blade. He still, to this day, can't quite remember what happened after that. He knew there was a surge of power but wasn't sure where or who it had come from. The blade was gone, nowhere to be seen. Sam let loose a terrible shriek of pain and a red, ominous cloud escaped from Sam's mouth and eyes. It hovered above the battle field, blocking out the sky. All turned to watch as the cloud slowly evaporated. It didn't just sink back into the ground like most others had done, it just disappeared.
Dean looked at Sam, checking his eyes and instantly being relived to see his clear blue eyes staring back at him.
After the cloud/Lucifer had went away, the demons gave up the battle and returned to Hell. The angels rejoiced but all Dean could feel was a searing pain in his chest and a wave of exhaustion wash over him.
The battle was over now. There were still some demons running around causing trouble but the numbers had greatly decreased.
Dean sat down in front of the monument and laid his head against it. He closed his eyes then felt a hand touch his forehead. Dean's eyes snapped open and there in front of him stood a man in a beige trench coat. For an instant Dean thought it was Castiel but the body wasn't the same. He looked at the man that was now crouched in front of him, bright blue eyes peering into Dean's.
"I told you that I would always be with you didn't I?" The man asked in a patient tone, not unlike the one Castiel used. "Now you need to rest. Sleep, Dean, and when you awaken all will be well again." The man touched Dean's forehead with two fingers and Dean was asleep.
Dean awoke to the feel of a soft summer breeze. It was nice and carried the scent of cheery petals. He forced his eyes to open and when they did he almost gasped. Everything was so bright and vibrant. There were colors floating around that Dean had never seen before.
He heard a small laugh from somewhere to his left. "I told you it was magnificent here." Came the quiet voice of Castiel. There was no body, just a being of light, but Dean knew from the voice and the eyes that this was unmistakably Castiel.
"This is Heaven?" Dean asked, looking around some more. "It truly is beautiful, but why am I here?"
"You still don't get it, Dean. You stopped Lucifer. You saved the world! You deserve much more then just entrance into Heaven. But the war is finally over and you can rest for as long as you like now. There is no reason for you to fight anymore. And don't worry, you were right, Sam's doing pretty well with Ruby by his side. He will be fine." Castiel's mouth-less face somehow pulled off a smile.
Dean relaxed a little bit and then found himself falling into a deep sleep once more and for the first time in what seemed like years, his dreams weren't full of screaming and blood, just a soft, peaceful clearing, in a secluded wood, far away from any fighting o battles.